Rush but don't want to pledge???
 

Ok so last night one of my friends said she was going to go through rush, but she wasn't going to pledge. At the University she is attending (private, noncompetitive) she has many friends already in the XYZ chapter. She said she didn't want to take anyone else's spot that really wants to pledge and was asking me and a girl that is an XZY at her school when she needed to drop out. We said after pref as then you will not technically take someone else's bid. However, after I thought about it I realizedyou are taking someone else who really wants it at every part you attend, because of RFM. I've also seen people on here post about their friends who are just rushing with no intention of accepting a bid (yes I know this often doesn't turn out this way:) , but anyway I was just wondering why a girl would want to go through recruitment if she was hard pressed at not joining a sorority? Thoughts and clarification is greatly appreciated :)

She's really the only person who could answer that question. Though I'm sure others have thoughts on possibilities.

To meet people at a new campus.

To check out the sororities and see if it's what they're interested in before they actually ask their parents for the $$.

Because they're nosy. (LOL)

Because they think if they keep saying "I'm just doing this for giggles, I'm not going to pledge" they'll stay calmer and increase their chances of getting a bid - which is what they want to do all along. :)

If it's a noncompetitive rush RFM might not be an issue. Also if she's straight up told one of the sisters that she's just going through for fun and they DO need to cut people and it's between her and another girl, I'm sure that would come up in member selection sessions.

thats exactly what I was thinking honestly, especially from the gist of the conversation ( It wasn't exactly lengthy and well it was in the company of a few girls who a) are not greek but some "thought" about it a decided it wasn't worth it and b) don't really see why I or the XYZ went greek at our respective campuses ) it seemed as if at least a fourth of the XYZ chapter already knew her intentions to not accept a bid:confused: but I was just really really cnfused by the statement all together. SO I asked her why and she said something along the lines of not wanting to pay for it, but that still didn't explain why she decided to rush lol.

You asked for thoughts and I've voiced this opinion before. I snipped the part of your post that restates my thinking.

You should hear from lots of GCers, but to me, having just watched the Auburn recruitment online, I can't help thinking that someone like your friend may very well have hurt another PNM's chances. IMO, recruitment is not the time to be "experimenting" or "trying things on for size" but that's just my take. My opinion is not meant to be argumentative or mean. Rather, I'm considering all the PNMs who sign up with the intention of accepting a bid if they're fortunate enough to receive one, and I'm thinking about the heartbroken ones this morning.

(ps did you get your catsuit cleaned? :p)

Yeah that exactly what I thought and honestly I'm thinking maybe its just that she (and others) don't understand they are continually hurting others by rushing with no intention to accept a big if they are even offered one. I guess they may not understand all the logistics that go in to it however, and that there is a system beind it and only so many people can be invited back (heck I mean I barely understand it and I'm a member ).

(and yes I went and dropped it off at the cleaners, the guy asked me what it was for, I told him we were have a cat enthusist party with some of my friends in which we dressed like our favorite feline....he just looked at me weirdly :rolleyes: )

Most PNMs don't get the system as it is, and if it's a non-competitive school, you'er not realistically talking about a lot of damage done. And I don't think we should expect PNMs to act for the "greater good" so to speak.

Except for being nosy these were all reasons I originally went through recruitment. I didn't say I wouldn't accept a bid, but I wasn't certain I would, either...by the second night I was. Chances are that if she's already friends with girls in XYZ they probably know if she truly has no intention of accepting a bid instead of saying what she does for one of the above reasons.

as much as i agree for this particular pnm she is (or at least she thinks she is). Her exact statment "Yeah I asked XYZ sister when I needed to drop out because I don't want to actually take someone's spot that really wants it, so I'm going to drop after pref"

I wouldn't count a dropout until you hear the boom. If anyone remembers my daughter went through first round rush because I "made" her. Yes, I dangled a Presents dress in front of her. But she made if known that she was gone after round one. Then came round two...round three...and then Preference.

And then there was Bid Night, with my daughter screaming with the best of them.

So, you just can't tell what a young woman is thinking.