questions about pinning
 

can someone tell me what pinning is ....and i don't mean the giving of letter to another person...i know that...i want to know what it MEANS...what does it mean for a relationship? thanks

one step right before engangement. At least that's what i've learned from this board.

Yup.

Where I go to school, we have the same tradition amongst the greek community, but instead of giving his pin, a frat boy gives his beloved his "drop" aka his lavelier or whatever. My boyfriend just "dropped" me!

Here we have lavaliering, which is a serious step in our chapter...basically you give it to a girl who you think is the love of your life. At some schools it's less serious, just a boyfriend/girlfriend thing, but in my chapter it's one of the most serious things you can do.

This is how it works becuase we do ritual for it. Lavilering is before a pin (less serious) but few schools still use "pinning" pinning is supposed to come before engagement, but as i said, it's an older tradition. SO at most school lavilering is seen as the "big step."

Most of the time it was a very serious thing with our chapter too and usually the girl was the love of the brothers life. It was definitely a big step, one where all my brothers welcomed the lady into our family. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

[This message has been edited by Miami1839 (edited March 31, 2001).]

At Kent State, there were basically 3 stages....lavaliering, which meant you were seriously dating, pinning, and then engagement. I got all 3 from my Delt hubby of 6 1/2 years. He had been lavaliered once before http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/frown.gif but never pinned. I kept my pin until after my hubby's dad, also a Delt, passed away....I gave it back to go into the casket so that my hubby could keep his dad's badge. At our school, if a sorority girl was dating a GDI, he could lavalier her with her own letters, which I always thought was stupid. We also had "hurricaning," which most of the fraternities did when guys got lavaliered, pinned or engaged. My poor hubby had to go through it 3 times for me!!!

In the "old" days, we did both. A lavalier was kind of like "going steady" -- although a little more serious, maybe, then pinning was a step away from engagement.

At my school (U. of Tampa), giving someone your letters is a big deal. It means more for a girl to be given the letters of a fraternity than a guy those of a sorority, I think. But I've been to some very beautiful lavalerring ceremonies for DZs, and they made me cry both times.

Jen

can you UNpin someone? because what if they are not the right person for you and you don't figure it out until after the fact...

SimpleJane,

Yes, you can -- but it's not nearly as much fun. Kinda like you can break off an engagement, but probably won't enjoy the experience.

ErikaXO, glad that the relationship with a brother Delt worked out well. Congratulations.

My wife and I were lavaliered in college, but never pinned. (She had bids from Chi Omega, Pi Beta Phi and Alpha Delta Pi, but her parents said they would not pay a penny of her college is she pledged -- which is interesting since her Mom is an ADPi). Anyway, we've been married for over thirty years, though, so I guess it worked out.

DeltAlum