Advice for second time through
 

I went through formal recruitment this past year and it didn't really work out in my favor. I thought I was a shoe in for XYZ, but I later found out that several girls had voted no for me based on rumors. I've worked my hardest over the past year to make my reputation pristine and better my chances of getting in this year.

Does anyone have any advice on how to have a successful second time around recruitment?

A senior on my track team told me her story about how freshman year she didn't get a bid anywhere, but as a sophomore joined a colonizing sorority. We're going to have a colonizing sorority here my junior year (which sorority is still TBD.) I'm scared that if I wait until junior year to try and be a colony member, I will get rejected from that too.

1. You have no way of knowing WHY you didn't receive a bid, no matter what anyone tells you. BTW, no one is EVER a shoe-in, anywhere.

2. If you have reputation issues, work on those. Keep your eye on your schoolwork.

3. Try to enhance whatever wasn't stellar during this past recruitment (grades, personality, conversation, energy, put-together appearance, lack of activities, making friends with people), and work on that.

Your chances of getting a bid next time around? NO ONE can tell you that. In most places, waiting until you are a junior on the slight chance that a colonizing chapter will take you is not the best idea. Just because they will probably need upperclassmen doesn't mean that they will take just anyone.

Do you care to share what happened during recruitment? How far did you get? Did you receive a bid?

Was XYZ the only chapter were you attended pref? Did you put any other chapter on your bid list? I think the most important thing to remember for anyone going through recruitment, but most importantly for someone going through a second time, is to keep an OPEN MIND! Do NOT think you are a shoe-in for any chapter and leave all of your options open. Realize that all of the chapters on campus have something to offer. Recruitment is an artificial environment. If you don't click with the group during recruitment and you get a bid to a group that may not be your favorite, don't despair! Give it some time and effort. If you put your heart into it, more than likely, you will find women who you respond to, values that resonate and experiences that will make your college life memorable.

I didn't mean to say that I was guaranteed but I had a lot of friends in this sorority from sports, classes and clubs. One girl actually cried when I didn't get invited to pref. party.

And I have really worked on my reputation. A month before recruitment I started dating a boy who I've fallen head over heels in love with. This is going to sound cheesy, but he's the one for me and I've been with him since. The reputation issues from recruitment were that I was a "promiscuous" PNM. Now, I'm pretty sure that cannot be brought up next year, especially when I am in a committed monogamous relationship.

To be honest, I don't know what wasn't "stellar" last recruitment. I've always been a social person and good at conversation, etc. At my school, appearance really isn't part of the greek system. The majority of our campus is in varsity or club athletics so lots of girls will go to recruitment in their practice clothes and all my teammates/athletic friends who went in their practice clothes (except me and one other girl who was sick for two of the four rounds) got into a sorority. So I think that rules out the being "put together" category. I don't know. I've spent a lot of time with my sorority friends this year regardless of the fact that I didn't get in. I know this is a little backwards, but my best friend from home is a texan sorority gal and I'm going to spend lots of time with her this summer and have her put me through recruitment boot camp. If she can get me ready for southern recruitment, I think I can handle anything. :)

I actually didn't get invited to pref for XYZ. I got invited to round 4 for XYZ but then not to pref. I know it must sound like I am some social leper since I didn't get invited to pref party but I had a good amount of girls that I met in recruitment scratching their head as to why I didn't get an invite.

Not a bad idea:D As for the "put together" issue, even though people have gotten bids without putting their best foot forward, you are already at a disadvantage. You should do EVERYTHING to make yourself look your best. Hopefully people will forget any crazy rumors about you and your reputation.

I mean stellar as in, put the best food forward that YOU can. Being put together - I don't mean designer duds or hair in an up-do - means dressing appropriately for the occasion. What would you think if someone showed up to your wedding in shorts and sweaty from playing sports?
Honestly, could you not have packed a change of clothes to change into after practice? I know that you said that "every" other person who showed up in practice gear (besides you and the sick girl) received bids, but is that accurate? How many people overall didn't receive bids?

Clothing also changes the way we act. If you were playing soccer and showed up somewhere in your soccer uniform, you would likely be more rowdy and unreserved than if you were wearing a nice shirt and shoes. I'm not telling you not to be yourself - because you do sound like a nice girl with a lot going for you. I am not saying that it's all about appearance. There are other factors. I don't know your grades or anything else about you. There are probably 100 intangibles that go into membership selection.

You are not a social leper. No one is allowed to tell you why you did or did not get a bid, so perhaps the "good amount of girls" who are "scratching their heads" are just following the rules. If you are at the school I think, you don't have a lot of sororities, and if another one is coming on campus soon, my guess is that there is room for another.

If you can handle possible rejection, go through recruitment next year. Keep building upon who you are. Chances are, your friend from Texas will advise you to dress accordingly. It can't hurt, right? Take another look at EVERYTHING you did and said. Chances are, there is room for improvement (there is for all of us). Just keep polishing yourself. Good luck.

I am also going to be a sophomore this year who is rushing for the second time. I was wondering what the chances are that a sorority that drops you the first time will consider you the second time around? If I was cut the first time will I automatically be dropped again or is it likely that they will even remember me?

No. One. Can. Tell. You. What. Your. Chances. Are. In. Any. Situation.

Either go through and be able to accept whatever may or may not happen, or don't go through and forget about it.

Thanks everyone-

a bit of information I thought I would provide- upperclassmen teammates who were already sisters left practice at the same time as us, and except for putting on their letter shirts, or whatever the shirt was that night, they were in their practice clothes, sweaty and gross as the rest of us.

I am not sure of the overall number who don't receive bids. I never looked into that number.

I give up.

Srsly. The girls on your team who went to the parties fresh out of practice were ALREADY in chapters! Maybe you don't want to admit it, but not dressing up could have hurt you especially if your recruitment was competitive! I don't know if your practice schedule will conflict with recruitment if you choose to do so again but I would highly recommend a change of clothes and at least some dry shampoo (the big sexy hair brand is AMAZING) along with makeup/deoderant to look as put together as possible. Even if others will be going in practice gear, since you will be a second time PNM, anything you can do to help yourself stand out would be good! I know if I were an active at that school and knew you were coming straight from practice I would be impressed that you took the time to freshen up! I mean, as was said before, you wouldn't want someone in sweats at your wedding. Recruitment isn't quite the level of a wedding but for us sorority members its pretty damn close :)

I accept, I accept! I don't know why so many people come on here and get their panties (and/or boxers) in a twist...GC IS FUN!