Another one of those "didn't make the cut" threads
 

Hi everyone! I have just recently joined this site after finally becoming aware of its existence and I was hoping I could have a few questions answered if at all possible :)

I went through recruitment not really knowing what to expect, but I ended up loving the whole process and the idea of a sorority. I am a legacy at the same college my mother went to, but that really wasn't the basis for me going through it. However, because I didn't know what to expect, I was kind of confused as to how everything worked during recruitment. I had an open mind the first day and discovered I really liked some sororities in particular. The next day I was cut by my top four, (including my legacy, which I understand isn't guaranteed) and I was okay with that, but to be honest, my Rho Gams never really went over how the mutual selection worked and a ton of girls were left confused. At first I was kind of sad, but I thought to make the best of it and move on with what sororities were left! I ended up liking a lot of them that I didn't think I had a connection with and was very excited to proceed!

Yet, in the middle of the week (our formal recruitment spreads over two weekends) I get a call from my Rho Gam saying that they had to cut a ton of girls since they had double the amount from last year. Personally, I thought this was strange since I had no idea what the basis was for it. I'm sure people say this all the time, but out of the 5 sororities I still had left, I thought that I had made some connection with at least one of them. So basically, long story short, I never got to enjoy skit or preference night.

I was sad because I was a girl who never thought to be one to go Greek, and suddenly, I grew to love the idea after I went through recruitment, albeit only "half" of it.

However, I got really excited when a sorority messaged me on bid day to extend an invitation to their informal event. I was over the moon and was so happy at the event last night. All the girls were so much fun and I thought everything was going along smoothly. There was no pressure and we were just hanging out as girls having a blast. Yet, once more, I didn't get that call at the end of the night saying I got a bid, and the 5 other girls who were with me at informal all did.

Not to sound cocky by any means, but I am a very happy-go-lucky person that likes to laugh and I feel I am a really positive gal. I guess I'm just confused on what I did wrong, so to speak, if it seemed like all the girls in the sorority and myself were getting along and having a good time.

I know that no one has the answers as to the specifics, and I know these posts come and go all the time, but really, I'm so lost as to what goes into consideration come bid time...or even recruitment in general as I am still confused as to how they could just cut some girls in the middle of the week like that.

There are a few sororities still doing informal recruitment this week, but I don't know if that is invitation only. Also, because of the amount of girls, I think this will be the only time they do informal this year. I really want to be apart of the Greek Life, as I think that I could learn so much from these women, and that eventually I could bring something to the table as well.

Any tips about how to go about this? Anything is appreciated and know I am not asking for sympathy, but a genuine interest as to what to do. Thank you so much for future responses!

<3

I'm sorry you're confused and upset. It is a confusing process, and unfortunately many very nice girls don't end up recieving a bid.

My best advice to you is to maintain a positive attitude, become involved in other ways on campus, and try to talk to your Greek Advisor about the possibility of COR in the future. Most of us won't have any answers in relation to COR at your school, but your Greek Advisor may be able to provide guidance.

Also, you need to walk the line of not becoming a stalker (popping up out of nowhere with "HI GUYS OMG I LOVE YOU SO MUCH") while still maintaining a friendly attitude toward sorority members on campus. The best way to do that is not to ignore them on campus, and if there are sorority members in your classes you can say hello when you see them and offer a smile. Don't be creepy (we had a girl do that while I was in undergrad... eek), but be yourself and friendly. If they can remember your face and associate it with positive experiences, perhaps at the very least you'll have a friend. It could be the difference between recieving an invite to a COR event and not having the opportunity.

ahah okay, thank you so much! That's so crazy about the stalker, yikes! I really appreciate the feedback and I think I will try my luck at informal, but whatever happens happens :D

Thanks again!

Also, don't be rude. Ever. If you're super busy, and a sorority member stops over to say hi, say hi, apologize for being swamped, and tell her you hope to catch up with her later.

Don't just ignore them or say "OMG I'M SO STRESSED OUTBLKAJEGOIJWGOIWEG" and lay your entire day on her.

That happened to me once, too. Wow... maybe my campus was weird or something.

ETA: I'm not saying you do this. Or the creepy stalker thing. My point is that sometimes completely normal people can come off as creepy stalkerish. If you break your arm trying to wave to me while I'm on campus, I'm going to think you're strange.