How to know if a house received a rec?
 

I am a pnm and rushing this January. About a month ago, I asked a woman I know to send me a recommendation and told her it would be good to have it sent in 2 weeks or less (because the sororities invite you over to dinner with recs and I thought that would be to my advantage to get it done as soon as possible). But we played phone tag because she just started a teaching job and has been really busy. But she hasn't returned any of my calls or emails, so I am not sure if she sent it yet, but I feel like it would be rude to continue calling.

Basically, is there any way I could find out from panhellenic if the house received the rec? Or can pnms not know that information

no.

the alum might have sent it directly to the chapter, so panhellenic would have no way to know.

do you have the alum's address? if you have not yet sent her a thank you, you could do that now, which might prompt her to send the rec, if she has not yet done so. i agree with you, calling the alum again might come across as rude, although that is not your intent at all.

Yes, do send a thank you. This will be appropriate if she did write the rec, and could spur her into doing it if she has not done so. Beyond that, there is nothing you can do by way of contacting the school,etc.

As a backup, do you have another alum you can contact to write you one? The second alum does not need to know anything about your contact with the first one.

Also, be sure to give any alum you contact for recs your resume and a stamped envelope addressed to the chapter house. This stamped envelope really helps expedite the process.

Unfortunately I don't have her address or know how I could get it! I think I may call her and say thank you on a message, and then she will hopefully remember.