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But there is one other comment I wish to make. When LSD's mother & I were actives, a 5-generation legacy went through Rush. She didn't want to go Greek, but was forced to do so - and showed it. We talked to our Advisor about her, and were told that we had no choice. She did pledge, but was initiated at Convention, then fell off of the radar. Maybe it's for the best - but I can't help but wonder if there's a 6-generation legacy about to sign up for Recruitment... |
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Just saying.. things might change. |
Chi Omega also has enough legacies at some schools for 2-3 pledge classes. Our legacies now are only daughters and sisters of Chi Os.
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It seems to me that the best person to deliver that kind of news is someone who is currently actively involved in that rush. We (NPC) go out of our way to create a vacuum-like environment for recruitment. Why do we 'break the seal' for this? |
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So I can see that sometimes this is the case. Not as often as it's seemingly presented here, but sometimes. Thank you for clearing it up. I wish it weren't presented here as being so common, but I understand better. |
When I was cut from my (grandmother's) legacy sorority, they called my Grandfather --presumably because he gave money to the organization every year and she had passed away many years earlier. This, to me, was odd. I was fine with being cut--I knew I would be--and he was fine with me being cut. I would assume they had been told they had to call him, because it was not my Grandmother's chapter and I certainly didn't write anything other than her name and affiliation on my form. And this wasn't even the South!
As a collegiate, I dealt with with some very irate parents. We had two chapters on our campus that appealed to a very specific group of girls and we often had 3 times as many legacies from those chapters as could fit in a pledge class. It happens all over. |
Several things (I spent the last hour reading through the thread):
My chapter in a large Greek system is considered "undesirable" by PNMs and we often get ones who feel that it is beneath them to even talk to us for a short period of time. We have had some PNMs bring sisters to tears. It can get nasty. The stories about PNMs lacking discretion also hits home, because we have a long lunch break during most days of recruitment and as a winter recruitment school, we often don't have our letters visible. Groups of us will go out for lunch (I often run into friends in other chapters) but the PNMs are out too. I have heard some terrible statements about chapters, both mine and others, while the PNM was surrounded by actives! During the actual rounds, we had one PNM say she was passionate about starting a "fat camp." We thought this was a ploy for her to get out of visiting our chapter again, but apparently she told every chapter this! She was serious! I don't know what happened to her, but I imagine it offended many of the chapters. Final comment, we had a legacy issue because someone did not want to make the phone call to her relative. She was downright strange, but she was not released because of the phone call. In the end, she caused a lot of hurt and tension in the chapter, so now phone calls are considered if necessary. |
Gamma Phi Beta's policy on legacies is public information:
https://www.gammaphibeta.org/members.../legacy-policy We leave it to the PNM to make the notification to her legacy-maker. I also like the way the whole policy is worded - it is clear, cautious and supportive of the PNM. |
If anyone wants to read ADPi's policy it is also public: https://www.alphadeltapi.org/files/1...troduction.pdf
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We've had this policy "PNM self-notification" policy for as long as I can remember. I agree with it. |
Legacy
My girls preffed at ZTA but joined another group at FSU. I told them to follow their hearts.
That is a most beautiful picture of a family legacy. |
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Alpha Omicron Pi's legacy policy is also available on our website. Yes, we still "make the call". Sisters/daughters/granddaughters are all considered legacies, and we also specify that step and adopted sisters/daughters/granddaughters are as well. Not sure how many other NPCs include the step and adopted language? https://www.alphaomicronpi.org/exper...aoii-legacies/ |
This is Delta Gamma's:
A legacy is a great-granddaughter, granddaughter, daughter, sister or the same step-relation of a Delta Gamma member. Delta Gamma legacies receive special consideration in recruitment, as they already have a connection with Delta Gamma. Delta Gammas wishing to let a chapter know about her legacy should complete a Sponsor Form. The sponsor can choose to be notified during recruitment if her legacy is not returning to a Delta Gamma recruitment event by voluntarily including contact information on the form. |
For ASA:
A legacy is defined as: -Sister/step-sister -Daughter/step-daughter -Granddaughter/step-granddaughter -Niece/step-niece of an Alpha Sigma Alpha member. https://www.alphasigmaalpha.org/join...ies-referrals/ |
I started Googling and stumbled upon this thread. Keep in mind this was started in 2002, but some might find it interesting to see what's changed and what's stayed the same within each policy.
http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=18486 |
Pardon me for stepping in, LOL!
Just because a person is a legacy Male or Female does not mean they would be right for a certain Chapter for a fit. Is that that the most important thing first and fore most? The Right Fit where a person will feel more at hone and better! Brothers son (# 54) son was recruited, chapter felt he was a lock and moved on passed him. Well, he pledged Sig Ep, right across the street from the LXA house. The Chapter was piss to put it bluntly! My first response was Whose Fault was it? Not the sons, but the chapter. If they are worth rushing, never figure it is a lock! |
I would hate to be the person that had to make those phone calls. Especially when you couldn't tell the person why the legacy was released.
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It can be worse if you really do know the answer. Some of those answers are SHOCKING.:eek:
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I refuse to be the one who tells them, "Here's where you can see a public photo of your granddaughter, drunk and peeing in a sink."
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Oh my......I need to stay more sheltered.....My daughter starts recruitment on Monday and is a triple legacy, but I can say with almost 100% certainty that she doesn't have any drunk peeing in the sink photos...just not her style at all.....I know...mom doesn't always know about these things...but she is pretty "dull" in the party department and her posse hung out at our house and played cards and watched movies most weekend nights......
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As a membership adviser for a chapter, my retinas have been burned with images the past few years of young women making poor choices and then documenting those poor choices on SnapChat or Instagram. I do not care what you think....nothing is PRIVATE when you post on social media!!!
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I just got this email from my chapter, and I wanted to share the text because I thought it was a great example of how to thank an alum who submits a recommendation.
Dear Sister, On behalf of the recruitment team for the Zeta Nu Chapter of Alpha Delta Pi, thank you for submitting the Potential New Member Profile (recommendation form)/Legacy Introduction Form for <PNM name>. Our Recruitment Team is gearing up for another successful recruitment at Clemson University, and we look forward to meeting every Potential New Member (PNM) starting on August 19th! As many as 1200 PNMs will register for recruitment at Clemson University in 2017, and each year the women are more impressive than the year before. The PNMs seem to all have exceptional grades and test scores, and each resume reflects extraordinary achievements in the areas of scholarship, leadership, community service, and extra-curricular activities. Please know that we sincerely appreciate your recommendation, and we will carefully consider your input. As much as we wish everyone could find her home in Alpha Delta Pi, the intense competition and the invitation figures established by Panhellenic present major challenges for us as a chapter. The reality is that we will be able to call only about 75 young women our new sisters on Bid Day. In accordance with privacy protections maintained for the PNMs, no member of the Recruitment Team, including advisors, can release or discuss any specific information regarding a PNM with an Alpha Delta Pi alumna. However, if you have any general questions about the recruitment process at Clemson University or in Alpha Delta Pi, please contact Zeta Nu's Recruitment Advisor, <name and email>, or Zeta Nu's Chapter Advisor, <name and email>. Again, thank you for your recommendation. We are so excited to meet all of these amazing women so soon! Go Tigers! Go Greek! Go ADPi! Loyally, The Zeta Nu Recruitment Team at Clemson University |
clemsongirl, very nicely worded acknowledgement! Receiving an acknowledgement of one's legacy reference would go a long way toward decreasing the sting of the legacy being released during rush. At least it gives the alum the courtesy of her feelings being acknowledged by the chapter as she extends a reference for someone who is more than a sorority sister to her-her daughter or her grand-daughter. Courtesy goes a long way in a person's social life as well as in business networking. Kudos to you and your Alpha Delta Pi chapter.
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Wow, clemsongirl, I have to say, that's probably the best response I've ever seen from a recommendation!
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Bumping for recruitment 2018-
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We're in the top 4 at this school (not my Alma Mater) so at this point my thoughts are she's on her own as far as I'm concerned. The one she thinks she'll just get a bid to happens to be the supposed top house. She may get through, and I hope she is happy regardless. Sometimes you just have to graciously back away. |
One of my sister was the local Alumnae Panhellenic President. She told us about one of the gals who belong to the AP Group. The woman was a member of ABC sorority. The other women offered to write a rec for DD. Woman informed the other members of the AP their recs were not needed DD was going to pledge ABC or nothing. Have not heard the results of DD's recruitment.
DaffyKD |
This one is always a good one to bump so---TTT!!!!
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Hello everyone, I am new here and have laughed a lot reading these stories of girls thinking they have the option to choose.
I am actually having the opposite issue with my daughter. My sorority is very good at the school she is attending (SEC school). I have made sure she understands how the process works and made it clear that being a legacy guarantees her nothing. I have also made sure she understands that what was best for me 28 years ago at another university made not be where she finds her home and that this is her chance to really find her fit. There is no pressure to be the same as me. Here’s where I need advice— we have “friends” that believe that they know everything there is to know about sororities and they have her completely freaked out. They have told her that she will be cut by the other houses because she is a legacy and that my sorority is pretty much impossible to get in to these days. She has friends in 5 of the 8 on campus and she has been working her connections— she has made sure she has a rec for every house and has told everyone that she is very excited about recruitment and going in with an open mind. She looks great on paper and her social media is clean. She’s trying to do everything right and instead of being the girl that is overconfident, she’s the one that thinks she’s going to be cut because of me. My advice to her has been to ignore those folks and to make sure she’s making good conversation in the house and making it clear that she has an open mind. Any other insight? What are your thoughts on her being cut simply because she’s a legacy? |
Well, the answer to this is yes--and no. You're more likely to get a heavy legacy cut if you have a sitting sister in the house; this happened to one of my nieces. But you're in the South and you may be in one of the sororities that has ten thousand legacies coming through (you know which ones those are); the sororities won't just cut them all, because there are so many.
Tell her to focus on the rushers, to make eye contact with them, and try to have some great conversations. That's almost everything she can control at this point anyway! |
If she has friends in 5 of the 8 groups, they hopefully know her well enough to know she has an open mind to all groups and isn’t making a beeline to your sorority only. And hopefully they’ll convey that during membership selection.
Soccermom - did you go to another SEC school or something totally different? |
Thank you for your input. She has really worked to make sure that her friends know that she is interested in all the chapters and although they know we are very close she is interested in forging her own path. They have told her that they would advocate for her so hopefully that is true.
This is a school that I do feel will have alot of legacies, not just from my sorority but the other popular ones as well. I thought the same thing in regards to the difference in a sister being active versus a mom from a totally different university. I did not attend an SEC school. |
I saw so many overconfident girls rush this year. None got the groups they wanted and several dropped out of recruitment. Sometimes, as an adult familiar with various school and their Greek systems, you see it coming and there's nothing you can do because they truly believe that their high school popularity, grades, and activities will get them in.
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