Don't know anyone
 

I'm going to be a freshman at UF this fall. I have a pretty good idea of the top 3 choices of fraternities that I want try and join. The problem is that the majority of the members come from the same couple of schools (private and the top public schools). My hs doesn't have a very good reputaion (on the poor side and a little violent, although my family is pretty well off and I wouldn't consider myself dangerous).

I don't personally know anyone in any of the fraternities (only 5 or 6 people from my hs get accepted to UF every year), but I do know who a couple people are through friends and co-workers, although they won't know me. One of the guys that I work with is the brother of the president of one of the fraternities that I am considering and I know a girl who knows a lot about the Greek system at UF and has helped me narrow down my choices. (she goes to one of the hs schools that a lot of people in the fraternities are from so she knows a lot of the members).

I was involved in a couple of sports in hs and an officer in several clubs, including class office. I also did a lot of volunteer work and was number 11 in my class. I would consider myself a social person who gets along with almost everyone.

Do I have a chance of getting in one of my top choices (they are also top tier)? Do they already know who they want to give bids to before rush starts? Should I wait until rush or contact them ahead of time?

Go ahead and talk to your co-worker and ask him for advice about going Greek at UF. If you start it off that way, then that leaves him room to offer to pass your name along if he wants to.

The lady who is helping you out has already helped you it appears, so you can be more direct in asking if she could pass your name along and get it to rush chairs.

With 1, maybe 2, people to help get your name passed along- that is all you need to get a good start. I have little familiarity with UF, but as a competitive Greek system there will most certainly be a lot of rush going on now and over the summer. Now is the time to get your name out there.

Also, go to the school website and see if you need to register to rush in the fall. If you do, go ahead and register now in case rush chairs are consulting that list for prospects (some chapters do, some don't- so can't hurt to have your name out there.)

Finally, since you do not know anyone in these chapters yet- while it is okay to do some research and pick out chapters you might like, be careful about getting too set in your mind where you want to end up. You will be surprised at how different they can be when you get there- both from each other and from your original impression from afar, and often it will just be a handful of guys you get along with that will make all the difference.

It is my experience guys are rarely "sold" on a chapter based on everyone there. It usually comes down to a couple of guys you really get along with who also like you and will actively push the chapter to give you a bid.

I have talked to the guy I worked with about the Greek system several times. He was never interested in it so he doesn't seem know that much about it. He also was set on going to UF and didn't get in so he's not overly enthusiastic about anything to do with them. He has said that he would tell his brother about me and ask him some questions, but his brother is staying in Gainesville and he's in Jacksonville and I don't get the impression that they talk all the time.


I think that the girl is my best bet at getting my name passed along since she seems to be well integrated into UF's Greek system.

I can't find anywhere to register for Rush so I'm assuming that you register a couple days before rush begins. I'm going to be on campus next week for orientation so I can probably find out then.

Should I send my current top choice fraternities to rush(I'm going to keep an open mind about other fraternities once I get there) an email letting them know that I'm interested? If so, what kind of information should I include?

I'll be honest. I've always thought that two things are your best bets in any fraternity system in the south. The first is connections and the second is the high school you went to. Since you have neither of those going for you, it is certainly much harder.

I don't know about Florida's orientation, but at Arkansas orientation (was there last night actually), the fraternities have booths where people can sign up on lists to let the fraternities know they're interested. The fraternities usually take 'em out later that night to go boozing and so forth. Try to sign up on those lists, furthermore find out about summer rush parties. Most fraternities at UofA have parties in Dallas, Memphis and Little Rock. There may be one closer to your house.

The connections and my high school are what I have been worried about. Hopefully the fraternities will have tables set up at orientation. Thanks for the info.

If you're not up there Summer B (that's when a lot of houses will target guys for the fall) see if you can find out either by contacting their rush chairs or through friends who are there Summer B when their summer rush BBQs are and try to get to those.

And UFs top tier is basically SAE/KA as 1a and ATO/EX as 1b.

[quote=gator6288;1667080]
I don't personally know anyone in any of the fraternities (only 5 or 6 people from my hs get accepted to UF every year), but I do know who a couple people are through friends and co-workers, although they won't know me. One of the guys that I work with is the brother of the president of one of the fraternities that I am considering and I know a girl who knows a lot about the Greek system at UF and has helped me narrow down my choices. (she goes to one of the hs schools that a lot of people in the fraternities are from so she knows a lot of the members).

I was involved in a couple of sports in hs and an officer in several clubs, including class office. I also did a lot of volunteer work and was number 11 in my class. I would consider myself a social person who gets along with almost everyone.

[quote]

Sometimes, barriers are stronger in our minds than they are in reality.

First, the fact that only a few kids from your HS go to UF may be in your favor. People may not be aware of the supposed "reputation". If they are, they may be impressed that you stood out academically and athletically.

Your class ranking is fabulous (unless it was out of 15, but that doesn't sound like the case), you were a member and officer of clubs (leadsership skills), you played sports (you are a team player) and you volunteered. For someone to be able to exist and excel in several areas of life, you would have to be a decent all-around, likeable person.

I suggest that you do everything that the guys above suggested, but try not to listen to the negatives - if only to put positive energy out there. Try to visit as many "booths" or events that might be happening. Wear something (a certain hat or belt) or tell them something memorable about yourself, kind of having a "thing" that people might be able to remember you by.

ALso during orientation, show interest in some clubs or other groups - you may meet brothers of the different fraternities in different settings. The more that you are "out there", the more likely it is that people will get to know that you exist.

Best of luck!!!

Hopefully you are right. I'll visit all the booths for everything, not just fraternities and try to get my name out there that way as well.

I finally found the rush application. It was on Facebook, which I thought was kind of weird. It wasn't even mentioned on Greekgator.com, UF's fraternity website. I had to call the IFC to find out where it was.

Use this is an example of what NOT to do. http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=93669

Elephant Walk, CrackerBarrel (and TexasWSP if you see this), what do you guys think about this?

It is a question that comes up a lot, and I really don't know the answer since I came into the rush process back in my time without having to call anyone to get the ball rolling. It was known I was interested, and I was contacted. I figure it was the same for you guys too, but as active chapter members you have a better handle on current practice than I do.

My inclination is that it is bad form purely on the grounds that the "connections" angle we have been discussing is how names get passed around. I know in my chapter the rush captains get names from alumni and from actives who check around with their younger siblings or friends still in high school. We don't really get people contacting us first, and I assume it was like that when I was an active too.

I could see direct contact ("cold calling") to the chapters as okay for someone coming from out of state who is very unlikely to have existing contacts in the area, but from an in-state individual it seems like it would raise a red flag.

Gator6288- don't let any of this freak you out. You are asking the right questions and taking the right attitude. These little details are important and so that is why I want to get some consensus on this question of yours.

I hadn't thought about it.

It's rarely, if ever, done to my knowledge at our chapter or others (except obviously emails from alumni's telling us to "watch out for this guy") on campus.

A properly worded letter that says the right things (I'm not sure exactly what those right things are, however), could be beneficial.

I almost suggested using Facebook to do this because then the Rush chair could feel you out better based some on your profile, but I feel it might be to informal for something as serious.

Likewise, our rush chair doesn't check his email but once a week, but that's mainly cuz he's an irresponsible student.

If you're a legacy or are good friends with an alum from the house, have those people send a letter. And then if you want to go to the summer stuff and aren't doing summer classes, maybe email the rush chair once summer classes start and say you're in and out of town and wanted to know if they were having a bbq over summer or anything, but I wouldn't just send them a letter saying you want to rush.

If you said you have some friends of friends in the house, maybe just casually try to talk to them about the house and say you're thinking about rushing so hopefully they get the picture and tell people to keep an eye out for you, but just writing to the rush chair to say "I want to rush!" would be a bit odd. I would at most just ask if they're having any bbqs over the summer because you wanted to get a feel for the house before rush or something of that nature.

I'll send a facebook message to the rush chairs of some of my top choices. Since the rush seems to be pretty connected to facebook (the rush application), that sounds like it might be my best bet. Thanks

Do keep in mind, anytime you facebook message someone this gives them access to parts of your profile.

If they had access to my facebook profile it would give them the opportunity to learn a little bit about me ahead of time. Is that a good thing or should I let just wait and let them form their opinions of me in person?

Depends on what's on your facebook profile. It can either make you seem cool or like a douche.

I obviously think that my facebook profile would make me look cool since its mine lol. Can you think of some things that would make me look like a douche on facebook from a fraternity's POV as opposed to a high schooler's POV(mine) without actually seeing my profile?

Did you just show up for rush or did you get involved in some of the parties and BBQs during the summer. I don't start until fall so I don't have the luxury of hanging out with all the fraternities over the summer and meeting them that way, but Jacksonville is only about 1 1/2 hours away so I can go up to Gainesville for a couple of events if I get invited.

1. Sorry about your school choice... enjoy four years of fat girls, nerds, and good football teams. Also: Eat Gumby's pokey sticks
2. DO NOT contact rush chairs via facebook, it seems desperate.
3. Read my thread on biggest rush mistakes at any institution and pay attention to everything as you are rushing an SEC school. Granted, its the SEC's bastard child, but SEC nonetheless.

I am new to all this
 

I am serious about coming to North America to pursue a career in military medicine, and I have a great interest in studying medicine in an American university.
I am currently living in Britain and I am 16 years old so I need to start considering my options about a university placement next year. But I also think the Greek System is nothing short of brilliant as it instills in to many young men the idea of brotherhood and teamwork that are vital skills to become a good person in future life. However this system is regrettably lacking in UK universities.
I was wondering that me being British, would i be even considered for a placement in a fraternity or would i get shunned away because I would be new to the culture.
In my last public exams I came fourth in my whole year group of about 200 teenagers this year, I play county field hockey which I imagine would be similar to someone playing for their state, i am also 12th in the UK for U18s tennis. With my high school I also participate in a lot of voluntary work where i go to a homeless shelter regularly and help in the soup kitchens. i consider myself to be a social person who gets along with everyone.
Thanks for any replies http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/icons/icon7.gif

Being British would not hurt you at all.

Have you got any advice on things I would not to research before considering rushing a fraternity? or things i could do so that i would stand a better chance?

Check some of the older threads out Wil-IIRC that has been covered once or twice here.

I think being British may help rush, I would bet that there are houses that think it would be cool to have a British guy assuming you are still up to their standards as a rushee.

I got some great news from my brother today. I'd asked him a while ago if he knew anyone in our family that was in a fraternity. He had told me that my dad's school didn't have them and my uncle quit school and had to quit his fraternity. Today he sends me an email with a link to a website that his wife had found. It was to a yearbook website for a large university up north and listed my grandpa as vp of the fraternity that is my top choice. So now I guess I'm a legacy which should hopefully help my chances a little bit.

This could potentially be a plus for you. When you register for rush with UF, make sure you note you are a legacy through your grandfather on the form. I assume they ask for that data as is done at other schools where I am more familiar with the rush process.

Strong southern chapters of some fraternities are very different from the northern chapters- in fact I think this exists to some degree in most organizations which have a strong presence in both the North and South. It is largely reflective of cultural differences at large, not necessarily anything resulting specifically from fraternity members.

I just say that to be realistic and let you know this could help- but don't count on it to make things happen on its own. When I was an active, we once had a guy come through formal rush who made no attempt to do summer rush or anything and just assumed that because his Dad was from one of our small chapters up north that he would be a shoe in for us. He was never invited back. I'm not saying you're "that guy"- just offering the advice to let it be known you are a legacy, but don't assume it will make or break the deal.

That said, if you keep on making discreet inquiries and getting results as you have been- it certainly can only help you that you are legacy. It will be one more plus in an overall solid package.

I know it doesn't guarantee anything and that it is a bad thing to keep bringing it up over and over during rush, but since I am missing some key things (lots of friends in the fraternity and not going to the "right" hs), it seemed like it was something that could make my rush application stand out a little bit before I even get there. During rush, do I wait to be asked if I am a legacy or mention it once or twice and leave it at that?

Make sure you mention it to the rush chairs and if someone asks why you're interested in that house tell them all the other reasons that it's your first choice and mention that you also wanted to check them out because you're a legacy.

I'm also kind of interested in how you know they're your first choice if you haven't been at UF and don't know anyone in any house, but if you have your reasons, ok. I would make sure you at least look at all the top tier too if you think you have a shot at bids at those houses.

All 4 at UF are strong and you want to make sure you pick the one that is the best fit for you, the big 4 (SAE, KA, EX, ATO) are better than the rest of the houses, but there isn't one that is significantly better than the other 3 to the point that it should be everyone's first choice.

Another reason to look at multiple ones is that if you suicide rush and don't get a bid at your first house by late in the week you're out to dry. Spend a good amount of time at any of the houses you would consider taking a bid at if you got one.

To add to this, if you don't mind crackerbarrel, don't make it look like your blatantly using it to up yourself, it'll be on the forms you fill out, so they will know. As far as when to throw it out there, gauge the conversation, like Crackerbarrel said, if someone asked, say it. Don't go around telling every person in the fraternity your a legacy, its a little overkill. Just be smart about it, and use it sparingly and when the time comes. I'm sure you've read other posts about it, but being a legacy does make you entitled to shit. They don't have to pledge you, they sure as hell don't have to initiate you, they don't owe you a thing.

Right, in fact if you make the fact that you're a legacy a big point to everyone you may hurt your chances because it makes it seem like you think you're entitled to a bid.

At our chapter the only legacies who are pretty much assured a bid are younger siblings of active brothers or kids/grandkids of the really big donors who we can't piss off.

Words of wisdom.

That's life...sad, but true...isn't it? ^^

I dunno, I am ok with things being like that. A chapter has to be able to be very selective about its membership in order to maintain overall quality and reputation.

I think legacy is important in that the son of a fraternity brother is more likely to have parental support for joining one himself. It can also sometimes be an indicator of someone who comes from an environment/background that is desirable.

But beyond that, if a guy is not up to chapter standards I don't care how many of his relatives were in my fraternity- he doesn't need to get a bid unless the potential future financial value to the chapter of his legacy relatives outweighs his own shortcomings. Sounds cold, but all part of the idea of running a chapter like a business.

The points made, in part above, are all very valid. They are valid, in part, because they are the flip side of each other.

Yes you would like to at least show the appearance of keeping a "family" happy. But do you do that with a person who may just be the "black sheep" of a branch of that family?

Interesting balancing act that my chapter fortuitously never had to deal with.

Back to OP, follow some of the rather sound advice above.
Yes, it is alright to bring up your family connection. But remember that discretion can be the key.

Back to OP, follow some of the rather sound advice above.
Yes, it is alright to bring up your family connection. But remember that discretion can be the key.[/quote]


I would have to agree. It also depends on the chapter at that school. I would love for my son ( if i end up having a son one day) to be in the same fraternity as me. However, if its an awful chapter at that particular institution, I wouldn't blame him for going somewhere else to find a better fit.

You know I love you

With sororities, the grandmother would send a letter introducing the girl going through to chapter. (I think most groups even have a form for it.) Do you all not do that?

Sorority rush seems a lot more paper-based and bureaucratic generally so it's not really surprising that you guys wouldn't, but in this area it saves the person rushing the problem of how much to hype the connection since you could be sure that the chapter knew it without having to drop the info into the conversation with the right people.

It also might be a way to get the guy's name to the chapter early enough that they could invite him to summer rush events. Would the guy look bad if his grandfather sent such a letter?

Awwww. Bromance. :p

Quiet, yank:D