Joining Another Organization
 

I recently crossed a business fraternity. I am an African American female. As soon as I started wearing my letters, people (some greek some not) have been talking about me saying I am a sell out or teasing me about it saying it is not a real GLO. For those who do not know Delta Sigma Pi is a Professional Business Fraternity organized to foster the study of business in universities.

Things People have said to me

"You keep wearing your jacket like those letters mean something"
"Why would you join that, you couldn't get into a NPHC org"
"Yall the next NU PHI PSI"
"Yall get wood"


Now I am not ashamed of my organization in any way shape or form I just want to know if it is an issue for you and if so why? If I tried to pledge a NPHC would you hold this against me?

I would hope instead of laughing and down playing me, you would be proud of me trying to better myself and advance myself in my career Especially this early in my college career. I stepped outside of my box and comfort zone by pledging was not easy. I am just disappointed that my own people are down playing and talking about me instead of uplifting and congratulating me.

If this is really true:
I guess I'd have to wonder why ask this:
Having a chip on your shoulder will serve as an invitation to even more of the unwanted feedback that you have already been receiving. If you love your org, by all means, participate and take pride in your membership.

But lemme answer your question with a question: You stated you "pledged", "crossed", have a jacket, paddle, and endured a process that wasn't easy . . .so is this what you're repping on campus? If so, then there's no reason to get mad at "your people" for not celebrating your career development and professional advancement if you aren't even placing your emphasis on those things in the first place.

I don't understand why pledged and crossed are in quotes.

yeah, me neither

Members of professional fraternities/sororities are not prohibited from joining a NPHC org. The only problem I see from what you stated is if you over-hype your current affiliation, a NPHC org. might question your lifetime commitment to it.

"But lemme answer your question with a question: You stated you "pledged", "crossed", have a jacket, paddle, and endured a process that wasn't easy . . .so is this what you're repping on campus? If so, then there's no reason to get mad at "your people" for not celebrating your career development and professional advancement if you aren't even placing your emphasis on those things in the first place."

I am not mad by any means I am disappointed. When my paddle was seen I was in the student center waiting for a meeting in which I would present my paddle to my bigs and my ed. And why would I not were my jacket? I had just crossed. People on my campus know that DSP is a business fraternity. You can ask me any question or make any comment, but if you choose to let those be negative then you are trying to downplay me. I have not been asked what does your GLO represent I have been asked Are you trying to make up for not being in a black organization.

And yes I did Pledge and for 9 weeks
And yes I did Cross
Yes I did receive a jacket
And no it wasn't easy

People try to down play me like I just had a walk in the park and picked flowers and berries on my way through.

If you ask me what is Delta Sigma Pi I will tell you that it is a professional fraternity organized to foster the study of business in universities; We encourage scholarship, social activity, and the association of student for their mutual advancement by research and practice

But nobody has asked. They are too concerned about trying to talk about me.

So what are you talking about when you say is this what you are representing on campus

With all that said you still did not answer my question. I asked
1. How do you feel about it
2. In YOUR eyes would you hold that against me if I wanted to pledge A NPHC org

it really doesnt matter what WE feel about it - none of us are members of your undergraduate NPHC chapters so we've got no sayso.

would i hold it against you? i mean you do you. but you also dont know me from a can of paint. of course i do question your discretion. and really, if you are looking for others to validate YOUR letters you SAY you worked hard for, then i would also question that. no NPHC is going to validate you, not my organization at least. lets say the chapter you are interested in DOES hold this against you, then what? you denounce your letters? swear that the organization you pledged so hard for and earned means nada?

i find a huge disconnect between what youre telling us and showing us. in one e-breathe you a. spit me some textbook "XYZ is an organization that..." and b. swear up and down to me your process was no cakewalk.

I'm not greek yet, but I do think you're a sell out.

Thanks for invalidating the second part of your response to her question with the first part.

It really shouldn't matter what anyone says because people always talk about people. It's part of Greek life and life in general. Get over it. Just continue to do your thing and be positive on your campus.

The only thing left for you is not to use this GLO affiliation as a substitute for a D9 affiliation. If you're already on your campus strolling, chanting, and stepping in the name of your business GLO, then I wouldn't take you seriously either. (I didn't say you were doing that, but that wouldn't be a positive to anyone.)

You know, those were actually for emphasis - although after re-reading it, it does come off like the in-person, finger air-quote mockery. tld221 did a much better job of summing up what I intended to get across in the last section of her reply.

This is part of the problem (which I admit, I may have mistakely encouraged with the quotes):
I think that folks are way too busy being pressed and seeking validation for their process (and that goes for plenty in NPHC orgs too, but I digress . . .)

Anyhoo, DSPi: I didn't ask if you actually owned or did any of those things. My question was "Where are you placing your emphasis?" You are frustrated that others are focusing NPHC similarities instead of the fraternity's purpose - but if you are putting all of your energy into defending para and a process, then you seem to be serving as your own distraction.

^^^ Gotcha.

Although I sympathize with the original poster's frustrations, I can't say that it's happened to me (I pledged APO and wore para, etc -- no problems) and several of my friends pledged a foreign service fraternity. I've also seen DSP, AKPsi, and Phi Sigma Pi on other campuses. It really just all depends.

Also, I think that African Americans who pledge these organizations tend to introduce our own flair into them. And it's okay to have soul. But you also have to be wise about it. If you're the only one in your chapter wearing a jacket, then maybe you want to tone it down a little, just to reflect the values of your chapter more closely AND to recognize that the NPHC members on your campus would question it.

If you don't care, that's fine too, because it's all rather trivial. But remember that you have to be selected to be a member of an NPHC organization -- it's a lot more about the intangibles than it is merit.

I want to know why a business or other professional organization has a 'process' where you 'pledge'? I have never been in one, although I am considering joining a business/entreprenure-focused org because of my career direction. I will probably join NBMBAA or NAWBO or something like that but I don't understand why a FRATERNITY?

*shrugs* maybe its jut me....

Why a sorority? Why not a service club?

If you ask me about it I will tell you about it. The conversation never goes "what is that org" and I reply with a "man this was so hard"




If you ask me what DSP is I will tell you but when you already know what it is and all you do laugh and all you do is disrespect me for wearing my jacket, thats just mean. I honestly guess that really is just life.

I just trying to further myself in life and just grow as a person, I should say this.Some do actually show real interest. Not everybody acts that way towards me but most do.



I would just take it for what it is, if the interested organization chapter would hold it against me and I would try in Grad. But I will never denounce my letters

But thank you all for your feedback

As I was pledging I asked the same thing.
The girl replied with "Because this is a fraternity, we do what any other fraternity would do. If you have a problem or don't like it you night want to join AMA or CBA which are just organizations"

Her response just sounds like faulty logic to me.

If your process is not organic and intrinsic to your organization but rather an attempt to "do what any other fraternity would do"....

The correct answer should have included the words fellowship, close association, and brotherhood.

Exactly.

that really IS life. people will hate on what's not the norm/expected. it happens. and what makes you think a grad chapter wouldn't think anything of your affiliation?

ehh, whatever. youre a freshman. these next 3 years are gonna be a whirlwind. you may not even recognize yourself by graduation.

Okay, here's the thing. YES, some people are going to hold it against you especially if what they see you and your org doing on campus is a lot of para-wearing, stepping, and strolling and not a whole lot of business-related activities. You have to SHOW the other organizations on your campus what makes you different, work to EARN their respect, and make people realize why your org is not just a knock-off. Otherwise, no one is going to see any reason why you should get the chance to pledge a D9 organization. In the eyes of everyone on campus, your group might as well be a social, albeit just not a very good one. It's up to you and your chapter to change that image. (Spitting some pledge book rhetoric isn't going to help much, either.)

I totally agree. When I joined GSS at my school 10 years ago I experienced some of the same things as the OP...people telling us that we weren't a real sorority, why are we stepping and strolling and etc. when we were a service sorority, we heard it all. It made me a stronger person as an individual actually.

DSpi, if you're going to represent yourself in that manner, you're going to have to have a thicker skin and realize that sometimes no matter what you do, people are just going to have their opinion regardless, so you might as well channel your energy into making your org and your chapter look good and do positive things on your campus. Eventually folks are going to accept the fact that you're not going anywhere, or they're not. And also, if your chapter JUST STARTED doing this on your campus, then this was to be expected anyway. I'm not saying it's right, but it is what it is.

As far as your desire to join another organization, I can't speak too much on that...but from knowing my own sorors who have gone on to join D9 organizations, they just made it their business to present themselves in the best light possible. That's really all you can do like every other interest out there.

I must say that DSP has been on our campus since 1942 and you are right I am just going to have to brush it off and keep it moving. I think it is just shocking to others as well because I am 1 of 4 African Americans out of our 85 person chapter. I do feel like this is making me a stronger person slowly but surely. I know I still have more growing to do in how to handle people and the negative comments that they make. I am really thankful for your input and encouragement.

DSTren13

We do a lot of Para wearing, we always have programs and meetings at least 4 times out of the week. For Meetings you are required to were professional dress and pins and for all other programs you are required to were your letters. I don't think there is much of a problem with my organization there is more so a problem with me being in it. But we don't step or stroll we do a lot of fund raisers, we have a store that we run in our Business Building, we bring in Professional Speakers, do community service, and have chapter meetings. But any way thank you for you input as well.

Exactly what! She put those thing in parenthesis and I didn't know if she wanted me to clarify or if she was trying to be funny. So due to my slight confusion I just let her know that those things were true.

DSpi, what do you guys sell in your store?

My school was the home of Mu Chapter, which I recently learned was dechartered. :(

I think that you are questioning you own intentions.

I can only speak from my own experience regarding being in more than one organization with Greek letters.

I pledged Alpha Xi Delta, an NPC sorority, at my first college for the entire semester, but had to leave school due to health reasons, the week before final exams. I ended up not initiating. I had to leave my school after my sophmore year financial reasons. Two years later, when I matriculated at one of my state schools, I pledged and initiated at Gamma Sigma Sigma, a national service sorority. GSS is a service organization - it exists for different reasons, and although we pledged and wore letters, our existence was very different than that of NPC sororities. We didn't have formal rush, mixers or formal dances. I have been an active alumna of GSS. Two months ago, many years later, I was bestowed the honor to initiate into Alpha Xi Delta as an alumnae member. Becoming a sister of AXiD does not and will not change what GSS is to me.

I plan to be an active alumnae member of both Gamma Sig and AXiD. (Although this past year I have been very ill and have not been able to do a lot of extra stuff). What is amazing, is that I recently found out that a few founding mothers of Gamma Sig were actually also members of social sororities!
So to sum up my long post - people can belong to different groups, and it is commonly accepted. However, you have to make clear the reasons why you exist in each one. Blurring the lines in either organization may be what is confusing people. The thing is, if you are "repping" your Business GLO in the same sense that one would a social GLO, people may wonder where your allegiance lies. If you make them both equal in your eyes, then how are others supposed to see you?

Yes that was the Georgetown University Chapter. We mainly sell food like pizza,coffee, hot dogs and snacks in general but we also sell tickets to various sporting events basketball and football games to help out the sports teams, we sell cd's for the different choirs. I came up with an idea to sell bracelets which all proceeds go to the American Cancer Association, so they will implement that next year.

I agree with much that has been typed.

I want to add that I do and always have found it funny that professional organizations try to carry on like NPHC orgs (I am not including service orgs like APO in this, although it is interesting how that also varies by campus). I was in Phi Alpha Delta in college but never knew it was supposed to be something so heartfilled and important until I saw other schools having lines and stuff. Reppin' it HARD like "Phi Alpha Delta 'til the day I diiiiiiie" type stuff. But at some schools, the band is a frat with a crossing ceremony and "line names." LOL.

You might need to distinguish between your professional goals and your organizational goals. You also need to know what "lifetime commitment" means to you. What happens if you change your career goals (like I did, which is why I stopped being active in Phi Alpha Delta my senior year--still have my pin and probably my decorative paddle--college memories I guess)? Are you no longer wearing your business fraternity 'nalia and reppin' it to the fullest?

You won't be clowned if you aren't clownable. If you pursue an NPHC org just don't walk around like you've had the "NPHC experience" because you're in a business frat that cared enough to have line jackets and stuff. That business frat doesn't really mean anything as far as many NPHCers are concerned. Don't disown your business frat associations or respect for your business frat, though, just understand the different levels.

why?

I would find that funny as well but know that we are not trying to be like BGLO's. We were established before every single BGLO and founded before every single BGLO except for Alpha Phi Alpha. We have carried out all our traditions the same. So know that you have it twisted and flip flopped we do not in any way shape or form try to carry on like NPHC, I can truly say that about mt chapter. If anything BGLO's carry after the white fraternities, how can somebody who has done all of there traditions way before your time copy you. Any organization reppin till I die, why the LOL, unless you are in it you have no idea what they went through and all they are just letting you know that they love their organization that much. People in BGLO's do the same; do you LOL them.



I have distinguished between them. I do also know what a lifetime commitment is. If you change your career goals you are still expected to carry on in the fraternity because we encourage the association of students for their mutual advancement by research and practice meaning that we expect people to continually change and grow within our fraternity but know that we support you still the same. So yes I will represent my fraternity to the fullest and stay active, and in doing that you have to where your naila at every event that deal with DSP.

So being different and stepping out of your comfort zone and putting yourself into a situation where you know that most people of your stature are too afraid to go because it is established by the man and doesn't have enough black folk in it, is clownable? Wearing a jacket that everybody in the fraternity wears, is that clownable too? Why because I am a black female? Am I clownable because I am not following the slew of African americans? Am I clownable because I follow the traditions and the expectations of my fraternity?

I understand that they are on different levels and I always have. That is not the issue, the issue is others do not and I get called a wanna be.

Everything said doesn't need a response.

I respond to what I feel is necessary. You can choose not to read it.

And you can chose not to be pressed. Which is becoming more and more evident with each post.

I am that is why I am on her and I am the one that started the post. I amstill interested in what people have to say.

DSpi:


Thanks for answering my question about what you'd do if you were no longer interested in business and your understanding of a lifetime commitment. :)

You're defending and explaining your organization here but that confidence and understanding should be saved for your in-person assocations. Just don't get cocky and tell the members of the organization you're pursuing that they have it "twisted and flip flopped." :)

Oh and you're clownable as far as many people are concerned because you, among other things, boast of a difficult pledge process and crossing for a business fraternity. This is why your representation of your business fraternity has gone beyond just sporting a jacket. You were quick to assert that NPHC orgs are in fact copying white fraternities, you need to scratch that cocky line of reasoning if you really want to be taken seriously as an NPHC sorority aspirant. Some of the things that you are doing with your business fraternity are more often associated with NPHC orgs and you knew that before you came to GC to ask us this question.

So don't think it's just because you're a black female who has "gone against the grain." You aren't really going against the grain in a general sense (maybe on your campus you were) as much as you are just attaching a lot of meaning to a business fraternity affiliation. Blacks do stuff like that all the time on some campuses. So don't feel too much like a unique trailblazer in that regard. ;)

:wassat:

No disrespect but if your comebacks to the people in person that are pressing you are as snappy sounding as they are to the people on the board, I can see why people continue to bother you. The killer part is that you asked the question but argue/debate everyones answer. I was wondering if you wanted an opinion from the board or you just wanted people that agreed with your position.

At any rate I once heard that quote, knowledge speaks, wisdom listens. Just food for thought.

To the OP:

I say this in love (really, I do): Take a break from your thread (and the reply button), and come back to re-read everything in it carefully in a week or so. Shoot, maybe even wait until August. You asked for opinions, and you got plenty of 'em.

Offline critics? Answer 'em with a shrug and a smile, and keep it moving. From now on, pass on the hyping up or defending your business frat's process and para. That's just less energy you have available to participate in the org itself (not to mention school & getting your credentials in order for any attempt to pursue NPHC sorority membership).

Wow! Such composure. :D I was fired up ready to spit out a snarky reply.

Just wanted to comment on this point.

DSpi, it seems like the characteristics described above might be limited to yourself. I was a member of AKPsi in college, and I still work closely with my undergrad chapter when recruiting for my current company. Delta Sig and Phi Gamma Nu were also on our campus, and our chapter operations/customs were very similar. We NEVER mimicked NPHC tradition. Hell 98% of the membership probably wouldn't even know what they were in the 1st place. You stated that you were one of 4 AAs, so this makes me think that your chapter operates similarly...much more closely aligned with NPC/IFC customs (ex. rush, pledge classes, pledge families, initiation). The fact that you are using words like 'crossed' and speaking of wearing your jacket makes me think that you are interjecting customs and emphasis where there traditionally is none.

What I would suggest to you is that you learn to appreciate the existing culture of your business fraternity. While the customs are vastly different from those in the NPHC orgs, your years spent as an active chapter member can be very rewarding. Don't try to make this experience into something different from what it already is, and I doubt that anyone will get your intentions twisted. However if you continue to try to parallel the two experiences, then I would have to say that you most likely will not be pleased with your results.