MySpace Hoax Victim Kills Herself
 

I haven't seen this addressed here yet, but I imagine most have heard about it. Any discussion? Should MySpace be responsible? How about the parents, especially the family who "created" Josh? Is this an infringement of Free Speech, or is it more like yelling, "fire!" in a crowded theatre?

"Reforms urged after MySpace hoax's victim kills herself

By Betsy Taylor
Associated Press
from pantagraph.com

DARDENNE PRAIRIE, Mo. — Megan Meier thought she had made a new friend in cyberspace when a cute teenage boy named Josh contacted her on MySpace and began exchanging messages with her.

"Megan, a 13-year-old who suffered from depression and attention deficit disorder, corresponded with Josh for more than a month before he abruptly ended their friendship, telling her he had heard she was cruel.

"The next day Megan committed suicide. Her family learned later that Josh never actually existed; he was created by members of a neighborhood family that included a former friend of Megan's...

'''But when adults are involved and continue to screw with a 13-year-old, with or without mental problems, it is absolutely vile,'' she told the Suburban Journals of Greater St. Louis, which first reported on the case." (continued)

I absolutely think the mother that created "Josh" should be held at least partially responsible.

How damn cruel can one person be?:mad:

I saw an interview with Megan's parents on the Today show yesterday. It was the first I had heard of this story.

Before anyone here blames Megan's parents for allowing her to have a MySpace account (someone left a message about this on the link honey gave us), they said on Today that Megan and her parents created the account together, but only the parents knew the password to log on. So Megan couldn't access MySpace without one of her parents there. At first I thought, "Wow, talk about heli-parenting!" But then I realized that Megan was a 13 year-old girl on anti-depressants... and her parents probably realized she needed to be protected more than (probably) most teens.

This is such a sad story. I can't imagine that a mom would be so wrapped up in what someone might be saying about her daughter online that she would create a fictitious character in order to spy. Now, THAT's a helimom.

To address Honey's questions, no, I don't think MySpace should be held accountable at all. I think all responsibility falls on the family who created "Josh".

I realize that people create online identities that are far from the truth, and people will continue to do so. I guess I don't really see the harm in that except when those identities are created solely to cause someone else pain.

I can't believe the parent would get involved. "To see what Megan was saying about her child"? I don't have a myspace. Couldn't they have just seen Megan's postings? Did they have to create a boy to flirt and lead the girl on?

I hope they never have a peaceful night of sleep the rest of their life. That's not enough, but it's something.

That is the most disgusting story I have read in a long time.

That the neighbor/mother created the ficticious account with her daughter and then toyed with a depressed 13 year old's emotions is just awful. I can just imagine the mom and daughter sitting together, coming up with flirtatious things to say as "Josh," then laughing when the poor victim responded.

Poor parenting in the extreme! This takes heli-parenting to a new low.

They may not be legally responsible, but they have some moral responsibility in the suicide, and I hope they regret their actions for life. The weight of a child's death on your concience would be a heavy weight to bear.:mad:

I don't even see this as heli-parenting, say what you will about heliparents, in all their variations I've never heard them described as deliberately mean to other children.

This chick actually strikes me more as a Dina Lohan type - wants to be her daughter's "buddy" instead of parent, so she thinks it's "cool" to get on MySpace and screw with someone's head. How could she have known that her daughter was having problems w/ Megan unless her daughter told her and was fully in on the charade?

Good lord, I can't imagine what her parents are going through. Would they at least have a civil action against that woman for willful infliction of distress or something like that? Can't one of those 1-800 lawyer-types find some way to get at her somehow?

The Mother reminds me of the Mom from "Mean Girls"-- doing almost anything to be considered the "cool" mom. And she should be held responsible for what she did.

I think that sometimes people don't fully consider the repurcussions of what they do/say online because being online can sometimes shield us from visually seeing the other person's reaction. I think that this should change -- cyberbullies (like the creators of "Josh") need to be more consciencious of what another person may go through because of your joke, scheme, etc. When you intentionally set out to screw with someone, you're responsible for what happens (with some limits). For this girl's death, I think the Josh-creators (adult or of any age when you know better than this) should be at least partialy liable.

I used the term heli-parenting because she used the excuse that she was trying to find out what Megan was saying about her daughter on line to others, and that is why she used a ficticious my space account, to gain Megan's trust. It's sick if she truly believes that the ends justified the means in this case.

I think you are more on the mark that she was trying to be her kid's "friend".

This story ranks up there with another extreme case of "parent from hell" - the cheerleader mom in Texas.

Would you "blame" an ex-boyfriend for dumping a girl who committed suicide as a result?

It's not the same thing. This was an adult perpetrating a deliberate and cruel hoax on a child that she knew to be unstable.


And in answer to your question, if both parties in question were adults, no I wouldn't blame an ex.

The thing is...the mother who created "Josh" didn't want Megan to kill herself. I don't think that was the desired result. What they can charge her with might be limited. Also, she has to live the rest of her life knowing this hoax caused a girl to take her own life.


ETA: I am not saying what the mother did was right, by any means.

I doubt the adult knew the actual extent to which the child was unstable - I doubt anyone did, quite honestly, or different actions would have been taken.

Also, being cruel is not the same as causing someone's suicide - this is beside the fact that many breakups end with one person intentionally inflicting hurt on another. I think the analogy rings far more true than you give it credit.

Child vs. Adult is one thing, but that's also part of my point - we're overreacting because of the adult's involvement, when we should be focusing on the painful and preventable loss of a child who likely did not receive the treatment, support or attention she needed.

I am sure that the woman in question didn't mean for it to go this far. Cynically or naively I guess,I would just like to assume that an adult should know better from the start than to deliberately set up a situation like this. I'm not even talking about the suicide. I am raising a child around this age (11) and as an adult,I can't even imagine setting up one of her friends in a like situation. I would call it unthinkable to me not in the horrific sense but that I know that I would never even think of something like this as a means to problem solving.

I work with small children for a living so it is very difficult for me to view this situation unemotionally. I can't get past the "what the hell were they thinking" stage.

According to this article:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071203/...ternet_suicide

there will be no criminal charges filed against the people who sent this girl the cruel messages. After the case went public, however, lawmakers have been asked to review state laws in order to better deal with internet bullying cases in the future.

Ok, this whole story was sad, but I laughed when I read that. Y'all know why.;):p

Because that is the type of person you are?:rolleyes::p

Someone posted on another board I read that this blog is from the mother who created the profile: Megan Had It coming

Wow... I can only hope this blog is a fake, because this is downright scary to read. :eek:

Under the assumption that it's real: An adult, a parent, doing to a 13 year old girl the very things that were tearing her daughter apart.

She claims that she merely encouraged others to stand up to Megan, and that in the process "oops" some thing slipped out. Sorry. Uh uh. she should have taken away MySpace from her own daughter, or gee, made her profile PRIVATE. How can you 'prank' on someone whose profile you can't see? To turn around and inflict it on the perpetrator does not make you some beacon of internet justice, it makes you a vengeance-seeking hypocrite.

And then to keep your mouth shut because "well they lost their daughter, what could I say?" How about telling them everything you knew, witnessed and participated in. How can a parent be so callous when another parent loses a child... Oh because covering your ass and keeping your mouth shut clearly trumps honesty.

The fact that her blog's name is "Megan Had It Coming" just goes to show that Lori Drew feels no remorse whatsoever for her hand in Megan Meier's suicide.

She feels confident enough to tell her "story" to the world now that she knows charges will not be filed, but in reality, she should feel damn scared as hell for the vigilantes who'll stop at nothing to make sure Lori Drew pays for what she's done.

I hope that this haunts her and eats at her for the rest of her life.

I don't know what bothers me more...that she seems to have zero remorse for what happened while "defending her daughter" or that she is defending what she did.

But don't you understand!!! I was just defending my daughter in the only way I knew how!

An anonymous commenter made this comparison:
"Your 10 year old son beat up my 10 year old son, so it's ok for my 34 year old husband to go beat up your 10 year old son" It's not a perfect analogy, but the point is spot on.

Or that she filed a police report because she feared that people would harrass her or damage her property.

Jezebel has been pretty good about discussing this situation.

I seriously couldn't even bring myself to click into one link to read anything further about this situation or that awful woman, I am so thoroughly incensed and disgusted, I just don't know what I would do if I were Megan's parents...

I saw this story on the news not too long ago. It wasn't secret that the girl who killed herself was on anti-depressants for a very long time.

When the parents tried talking to the woman, her (the woman's) response was "get over it".

That lady has absolutely no remorse for what her actions did and that really bothers me.

The women sent messages (under "Josh's" name) like "the world would be better if you never existed" before the girl committed suicide.

Okay... maybe I'm just a little naive about blogs and the posts on Megan Had It Coming are from two different people... I think, though, that the first blog post at the bottom of the blog is Lori Drew (once again) pretending to be a teenager. She says that she was at Megan's school and Megan was a bitch, etc. Does anyone else find it really disturbing that Lori Drew started the blog out as a complete impersonation just like her impersonation of "Josh"?

So I'm guessing by her lawyer's statement on the Today Show that the whole issue of this latest blog is pretty moot. It seems that there are enough inconsistencies between her blog and what her "story" has been with the prosecutor that it is pretty safe to assume the blog is a fake.

Oh, it's not a moot point at all, because even in light of evidence (and every shred of reasonableness possible/Occam's Razor), it's still WAY more fun to assume that the woman is an unmitigated monster and that everything you read on the Internet is true.

Seriously - evidence, guys?

While I don't think that this woman is criminally responsible for Megan's death, I do find it disaturbing that this woman would go out of her way to create a BLOG about the girl after she died. While I agree that not everything in a blog is always true, I seriously question her sanity (and maturity) for doing this.

. . . and this is exactly illustrative of the point I was trying to make.

There is evidence the blog is not, in fact, Lori Drew. So . . . yeah - let's wait to find out if it really is hers, before we pile on any more?

That's not what I said (or even implied) - an Internet witch hunt just makes us look like uncivilized cretins, when it would be pretty simple to let the situation resolve itself before we assume a freaking blog is completely, 100% what it purports to be. It's inane.

Responses made on the assumption that the blog is true aren't the same thing as being certain that it's true.

That this person is so adamant in the defense of Lori strongly suggests that this is not some random internet crazy but someone close to the case. That 18 year old co-worker's looking like a likely suspect. So's the daughter. But it's either satire so well done no one's catching on, or someone very serious.

Ok, seriously. Who is this fool posting either random non sequiturs or just inane/trolly responses all over the place? Is this a situation where we can call in a Mod or do we just have to ignore and hope it slithers away?

Local news is reporting that a new investigation has been opened into the 'megan had it coming' blog. So, we'll see what happens. :/

Right, and I had no problem with (for instance) your post that stated as such - that's a totally fine way to handle a discussion, and it doesn't let the signal-to-noise ratio get pissed all over.

I do apologize for the hijack here, guys - seriously, my bad. However, it just seems crazy to make assumptions about such a horrible, horrible case like this, when the truth shouldn't take long to come out.

I was thinking the same thing as you.

As for the topic, I posted the link to the blog because I was surprised that anyone involved in this case (whether it is the mother, daughter or employee) would take a blog that far. It will be interesting to see what comes of this new investigation. I personally was blown away by the interview the mother's lawyer gave on the "Today" show.

While I can understand that the girl who committed suicide had some mental issues going on. At that age, I can only imagine that the thought that someone her age would say things like that was devastating.