update on my recruitment week so far...
 

OK so we're on Round 3 tonight... last night we rated... It went like this...

#1 A - Got along great... felt soo comfortable
#2 B - Again, got along great, felt comfy, but not as much as A
#3 C - Got along good, great conversation, somewhat comfy
#4 D - Weird silence, but got along good
#5 E - Really nothing in common, felt very out of place

so for tonight, I check the schedule
I'm meeting with A, D, & E.... I got the worst vibes out of D & E, but that is where I got called back... I'm so confused. I was really hoping at least one of my top 3 I'd have to choose, I just am not sure that I would want to accept a bid where I didn't feel comfy.... and I certainly don't want to put all my eggs in one basket with my top choice and just hope for the best...

I'm going to go with an open mind and hope that maybe things will be better with D & E tonight, but what if after tonight I still feel weird around them??? Is it better to put the eggs in one basket, or just walk away and go for COB????

I see no harm in going tonight to the 2 parties to which you were invited. Is it Pref night? If so, and you're still not "feeling it" with either chapter, then don't sign a preference/bid card and take your chances with COB. I wish you the best of luck tonight!

I'm going to be COMPLETELY honest (and probably get flamed, but whatever)...

You mentioned in another thread that you're pushing 30. You're probably going to want to take what you can get. You might be put in the position to either accept a bid where you don't feel 100% comfy and hope it works out, or not be Greek at all.

It's the hard reality of rushing later in life. I do hope you get invited back to your #1, but if you don't, I wouldn't count on a COB later.

My age should have nothing to do with wanting to get involved. There are members OLDER than me in the greek system where I go to school. I also checked into the age issue for every sorrority on campus BEFORE recruitment... there are none. In addition, NONE of the young ladies asked my age. (I also don't look anywhere near my mid 20's... so it's not like I look like an old spinster or something)

Pref night is Wednesday. I do intend on going to the meetings tonight. I'm staying open, but with not feeling comfortable and being a lifelong commitment to the sorority, I don't want to do something I am not feeling, does that make sense???

Whether they say so or not--age can be an issue. I certainly don't think its a "take what you can get" situation, but you do need to accept that may be a reason why you get cut.

Hopefully group A will work out for you--but you should give all a chance because sometimes its just a bad night or you don't talk with the right people.

You WANTING to get involved and you being CHOSEN to be involved are two seperate issues. In reality, YOU may be mature enough to realize that you could be an asset to a group...but you're not voting on yourself...a group of 18-22 year olds are. They may see it differently. If you say there are older folks on your campus in the Greek system...well, you know your campus better then I do. But, I'm just warning you.

I agree with Delta, you may end up talking to one girl tonight you totally click with and change your opinion of D or E entirely (it happened to me!) so don't discount them too early. It's definitely good to keep an open mind. Also, rushing is really nerve-wracking, think about it from their side also. They're just as nervous, if not more so, than you. THEY'RE the ones who have to impress you, THEY'RE the ones who need/want new members. I felt that when you walked into the room feeling confident like that, it helped my nerves and I was able to have better conversations with the women there, which ultimately helped me find my home. I have to say though, I remember cutting girls because they were Juniors, too busy with jobs, etc. so, though they may tell you they don't care, it is a reality, harsh though it may be. Sororities want freshman because they know they're more likely to be an active collegiate for a longer period of time, it's just the logistics of it.

Isn't "taking what you can get" completely opposite of what a sorority stands for???

and I am a transfer freshman, starting a new bachelor's degree and continuing with an MBA.

I had great conversations with A,B,C, OK conversations with D, and E was OK, but completely weird feeling (on both nights). I missed the skit for B due to class so at the end of the night, our recruitment director arranged for me to have 10 minutes with them so that they could see I was still interested. Even 25 people asking questions in 10 minutes, it was rushed, but all great conversation.

Wait you already have a degree? Do all of the sororities at your campus allow women who have a degree to rush/join?

On the sororities' side, yes, "taking what you can get" is mostly the opposite...

But, ask a PNM (or their momma, apparently) who just went through SEC rush, and it's different from the other side. Yes, there are girls who are "top tier or nothing", but there are also girls who were happy to get A bid, ANY bid.

And, you said you checked it out with the GL office and it's fine, but there are GLOs that have rules about bidding women who already have one bachelor's. THAT'S not in the GL Office's control.

I thought it was an NPC rule that in order to be eligible for membership, a PNM may not already have a bachelor's degree.

It's not an NPC rule, because there are a couple sororities that definitely allow grad students...but there are some sororities that have bylaws against it.

Obviously each sorority knows their rules and will act accordingly. Women who are rushing allow for their information is given to those in the chapters who need to that specific information-grades, and anything else on the application that is asked. I'm sure they will accept only those they can take so let's not fret over this aspect as obviously it will take care of itself.

I don't know about that. I seem to remember reading on here that an org had given a bid to a woman and then they had to take it back because it was in their bylaws that they couldn't bid someone who already had a degree.

Plus, I am not sure I've seen a recruitment app that asked about previous degrees. Schools yes, degrees no.

To avoid the heartache, UWO needs to ask this question specifically of the remaining chapters.

I think the heartache has already happened. While it is unusual for degree-holders to seek membership in a sorority, I can see why it might be necessary to ask about previous degrees. Women who are in UWO's position would know going into R what is allowed, as opposed to finding out once R has already started, and even worse, once her heart is already set on a particular org.

Let's face it, if women don't find out about the degree rule until after R has already begun (or once they have received their bids), chances are pretty slim that they'll risk losing membership in an org they desire by ratting themselves out. (I'm not suggesting the OP is the type of woman who would intentionally withhold info in order to increase her chances of getting a bid. I'm just saying that there are people like that out there.)

Whenever you are interviewing/auditioning/applying, there are things that shouldn't make a difference, but they often do. If you want the job/school/part, you can't focus on what they SHOULD be looking for. You have to worry about what they ARE looking for.
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This struck me as a little wierd. Can you be an MBA student and be considered a "freshman?" Even if you are pursuing a bachelor's degree in a different discipline, aren't you considered a "graduate"?

It depends on how the school classifies her. Some schools, if you are enrolled in an undergraduate degree seeking program, are going to classify you as an undergraduate regardless. Now, if she is pursuing her MBA at the same school/sametime, I would assume they would classify her a graduate student, for the sake of ease.

I guess it would depend on how her school classifies students.

After I got my BA, I returned the following semester to take undergrad classes, but even then I was listed as an "unclassified graduate student".

Good point, Low C, that's what I was trying to say earlier.

It's not that older members can't be involved. It's that a member who is that much older than the others is probably going to have different priorities. Also...and maybe no one else has ever experienced this, but I'm just going to throw it out there:

A lot of times, people who are in their 30's or above tend to 'talk down' to younger adults, try to reorganize and run things, and argue with the way things are done based on their "life experience". I'm not saying you do; I don't even know you. I'm just saying that I personally would be hesitant in bidding an older member because I wouldn't want her to disrupt the chapter in such a way. Of course, I would definitely give her a fair chance, but I would be more cautious.

I was talking to a chapter advisor whose chapter is just finishing up recruitment and this topic came up. They had a woman come through recruitment who was 27. On her campus, this wasn't a huge event, but it wasn't out of the ordinary either. The woman did end up receiving a bid, but it raised questions about how the PNM's would feel about having someone is a bit older and MUCH more mature than the average 18 year old freshmen pledging with them. We agreed that there are definite benefits to having someone who has experience and maturity coming through, but also wondering how she is going to "mesh" with 20 other 18 - 20 year old women with completely different priorities who she'll be going through her new member process with.

Anyway, the point of the little story is that it is possible for an older woman to receive a bid, however this woman did receive heavy cuts in the early rounds. Best of luck! Let us know where you end!

Which two are those? You can PM me the names.

Also, if an NPC sorority colonizes on a campus while a student is a graduate student, would collegiate membership be allowed in that case as well?

to answer all of the questions, i have an Associates Degree. I am a transfer freshman because UW only allowed one of my credits, so I am only entering the semester with 3 credits... so I AM AN UNDERGRAD. Once I finish my bachelors (BA and I want to do a BS)I want to go into their MBA program.
Yes they all know of my degree. I spoke with the greek life advisor on campus MONTHS before school even started.
I have completely honest with all of the young ladies I have had conversations with. I was invited back to 3, there were some girls who were invited back to one or none.
I do "mesh" well with younger people... I have to communicate with them daily in my line of work. Most of the people I do know since moving up here... are in that age range.
I'm not doing this the wrong way or hiding anything from any of the young ladies.

I would say that it's probably the case here...

I know everyone is different, but I'm 24, and I couldn't imagine wanting to pledge with a group of 18 year olds. I'm in a different stage in my life. Even if I wasn't married and a mom, I don't have the same interests as I did when I was an undergrad. I'm on my district's Education Coaching team, so I'll be doing a little supervising, but I wouldn't want to be committed to going to meetings and events constantly.

What if, in a make believe world, the OP does already have a bachelors degree, but fails to disclose that on the recruitment application?

Since there are only 2 NPCs that take post-grad members, and the likelihood of both being on her campus is probably not high, what were to happen if she got 'found out'?

I actually think that there are more than 2 that accept post-grad students. The two that are referenced are ones that specifically have it in their bylaws that they accept them. I don't think a majority of NPCs have rules either way.

I think it's sort of like the homosexual issue...there are a few groups that actually have it in their bylaws that they accept homosexuals, and others have no bylaws for or against it...it just is. Likewise, just because it's in their bylaws that they accept homosexuals, doesn't mean that in reality they will. The difference in this issue being that I doubt any NPCs have bylaws excluding homosexuals, whereas there are some NPCs that have bylaws excluding post-grads.

And regarding age, even if.. let's say you do look like you're in your mid-twenties, and let's pretend you don't already have a bachelor's degree, besides all of that, it is a much different experience when you're older in a sorority... especially if you are just a freshman.

There's this thing called a maturity level that will greatly differ (unless you happen to be an immature 30-yr old adult) from the 18-22 yr old girls.

I'm not saying all 18-22 yr olds are immature... just sayin' the difference between that group, and someone in their 30's is pretty different.

I am not an "immature 30 year old adult". I have my "home life" and my "school life". I work with young adults in that age range. For me to associate, communicate, and work with that age group allows me to better function and communicate with my line of work. It helps me to remember what I was going through at that age, what was going through my mind at that age. It easy to have a counselor tell you what to do because they read it in a book....but some people would prefer to have a counselor who is understanding and can relate to them on a greater level. I volunteer with many groups in that age range and I learn many things that I didn't when I was their age, it gives me a better sense of understanding. What I went through in my early 20's is different from what is happening today...

My suggestion would be to be yourself with the three sororities and be open to those you weren't as comfortable with. You will actually never know the exact reason you were cut from the other two groups - it may be your age and it may not.

Good luck to you and keep us posted on the rest of your recruitment experience!!

Go Titans! :)

What about AI? I know that I would feel uncomfortable rushing as a 25 year old and much more comfortable with alums who were more likely to be my age. I'm not trying to discourage you from rushing, just saying how I'd feel. I mean, I rushed as a sophomore and my pledge class was full of upperclassmen, so I was lucky, but subsequent pledge classes were mostly freshman and the longer I stayed a collegiate, the older I felt next to them. We had some older sisters in our chapter and they eventually kinda formed their own little group so I know they felt a little different from us, some even acted like they didn't need to participate in everything. That's another story though. My point is, would AI be an option? You have an associates but not a BA so I'm not sure if it would be allowed in some groups...?

Let’s not bring up AI because it is not a solution or an option for most people.

Ditto...let's not go there...

BUT...I'm pretty sure that NPC rules prevent anyone who's eligible for undergrad rush to AI, anyway, so I think it's a moot point.

Everytime someone says "What about AI?" a baby kitten dies.

THINK OF THE KITTENS!!!!!

As opposed to an adult kitten??:p;):D

Just kidding.