Really Need Help w/ Recs! I'm confused!
 

Hey everyone!:)
I am planning on rushing this fall as a freshman, so I have started thinking about getting recommendations. It seems like a big deal at the school I will be going to. I don't know where to start though, because I can't figure out where my local Panhellenic Association is? Also, I don't know who I could ask for recommendations.. I am starting to get frustrated, and I really could use anyone's help!

I live In Fort Smith, Arkansas.. and plan on attending the University of Arkansas in Fayetteville this fall. If anyone can help me out, I would greatly appreciate it!!!:o
Thank You!!

http://www.npcwomen.org/alumnae/a_directory.php

Email NPCCentral@npcwomen.org to obtain the current Association President's name and mailing address.

Please provide reason for requesting contact and/or information.

You will definitely need recs to all sororities at the U of A. I would ask your mom to help you - see if any of her friends or acquaintances are greek. Also ask your teachers, ladies from church, etc. Good luck!

This is a good suggestion - you might be pleasantly surprised to realize that you already do have a connection with some NPC women. (Or even that they could put you in touch with women who are Greek.) I'd also add to the list - neighbors, families you've babysat for regularly, your friends' parents, etc.

I'd be willing to bet that you know at least one or two NPC women, even if you don't realize it!

As susan314 noted, expand your list. As such - and I've said this before and I'll say it again - PNMs should check with male friends, family members and other male "connections" as well. Some might be married to an NPC member, have relatives that are members, and or have friends who are members.

From personal experience, I've been able to direct a few of my friends' daughters to NPC members who were then able to help them secure recommendations.

You probably will want to reach out to the Alumnae Panhellenic in Fayetteville for help (I'd guess they are very used to being asked) and not rely just on Fort Smith.

Do you have older friends you can ask? I was able to get letters for tridelta and axo from some friends at other schools.

Don't forget to ask your favorite teachers, counselors, etc. - When I taught I was able to help many of my students get recs!

Is it just me, or....
 

Haven't recs really deviated a lot from their original purpose? Originally a rec was supposedly a way for an alumna who knows the PNM well to assure her GLO that the PNM would be an asset to the organization. There had to be a relationship between the alumna and the PNM, or it was meaningless.

Now recs seem to be given so casually, by friends of friends of your parents, or by an alum chapter member who meets the PNM for 15 minutes at Starbucks. How much meaning can those types of recs really provide in the membership selection process? Think of a job recommendation: would you ever provide a formal job recommendation for someone that you didn't know really well? I would not, and I think sorority recs should be treated the same way.

And to the alumnae who agree to provide recs to young women they don't know or don't know well: obviously you are doing the PNMs a big favor as they scramble to check off all the GLOs on their campus, but might you be doing your sorority a disservice?

I think most rec forms have a place where you indicate both how and how well you know the PNM. A rec from a friend of the family who has known the PNM for years is going to carry more weight than one from someone who is providing an "information only" rec.

I think that the main thing is that rec. writer indicates the level of knowledge of the young woman. You make clear if you know her personally, for how long, etc, or if it's really more of an informative rec. without personal knowledge. But in most cases even a friend of a friend who did a little research would know anything that would keep a women from being an asset to the organization. If you hometown reputation was terrible, a hometown rec. writer would probably know it. (For example a girl from my hometown who embezzled from her part time job probably would have a hard time getting a strong hometown rec.)

In a lot of cases, it's just a question of finding out the affiliations of the people that you do already know. Unless you're from an area without a lot of female college graduates, you probably know more people who are greek than you realize.

Many orgs do not accept recs from active collegians.

I disagree. I can't speak for any other organization's rec form, but our rec form asks specifically how well you know the PNM. The chapter receiving the rec knows what level of knowledge the rec is based on and considers it accordingly. This is why PNMs on GreekChat are encouraged to exhaust all sources who know them well for recs before resorting to going through the local Alumnae Panhellenic or other contacts who wouldn't know them personally.

If a young woman in my community wanted to meet me for the purpose of obtaining a rec letter, I'd be happy to oblige. However, the rec letter would certainly not carry as much weight as one from someone who has known her/her family for years, and I'd make sure to let her know that. If she had no other options and felt that recs were a necessity at her school, I'd assist her. I don't feel that it would be doing a disservice to my organization, because they would be well aware of the level of my acquaintence with her.

Really? I thought there were more orgs who do allow their collegians to write recs than those who don't.

Alpha Gamma Delta collegians are allowed to write them. If I'm not mistaken (and I recall reading this somewhere on GC), Kappa Delta does too. I thought I saw a list of sororities that do allow recs from collegians, but I couldn't find it.

I don't know the breakdown, but PNM's should be aware that in some orgs, a letter from a collegian would be considered a "letter of introduction", not a formal rec.

However, those initiated collegians can assist in putting the PNM in contact with local alumnae. ;)

ASA allows collegiate recs.

Actually, Kappa Delta only allows recs from alumna members.

KD clarification
 

Correction:

Kappa Delta allows recs from collegiate members for women going through recruitment at other schools. This has been in effect since at least 2005 - maybe a couple years longer.

LOL...it was your post correcting someone else about the KD rec policy that I remembered reading! ;)

Likewise for Kappa. I am under the impression this the policy for many organizations that allow collegiate members to write recs.

Phi Mu does not. I would be surprised if we are the only ones, but either way, the PNM should make sure that the woman writing a rec is really in a position to do so, that's all.

We once got a rec from a woman who had turned in her badge. Um....?

Sorry for getting off track, but how did you know about her badge? Did she volunteer it in the letter or does everyone check the status of the women who submit recs? (I had just never thought of this before, and it's interesting. I guess you'd have to check so people didn't fake them, maybe, but it still surprised me.)

I remember hearing a story from an alum once about her chapter checking the membership status of rec-writers... and apparently a girl had a rec one year from an "aunt" who was never even a member of the org! The woman who told me the story said it was so hard not to ask the PNM whether the aunt was a fabrication or the aunt was a big fat liar. Either way, I'm sure the PNM was cut.

I wonder if lack of checking on the status of rec-writers opens the door for more instances like this one (especially in chapters that receive 2-3 recs for nearly every PNM).

It was someone who had been in our chapter recently enough for people to remember her.

I guess with most (if not all) sororities having their member database online in the Members-Only portion of their website, doing this wouldn't be so hard -- especially when the RIF (as ours is called) asks for First & Last Name, Chapter of Initiation, and Date of Initiation.

zta's rec. policy is that if a collegian writes a rec., she must have an alumna co-sign.