Too old to join a Sorority?
 

This is my first thread (and first post of anythig...as I've just joined). So work with me if I'm not doing it right :) I'm transferring down to University of South Alabama next Spring (would be Fall, but my boyfriend is in the military and is going to be home for the first time in a year in August...) and at that time I'll be 22. I waited awhile after highschool to start college, so I'll only be a sophomore when I transfer down there. Do you think 22 is too old to join?

When I read the title of this thread I thought you were going to say you were Moses sister or something:D ....you really think 22 is too old. I know ladies of both NPC and NPHC who would not think 22 is too old.

USA is a Deep South school. Your options may not be as extensive as others, but go in with an open mind and you may end up with a positive outcome. Keep in mind, however, that the members of your incoming class will be in the 17 - 18 year old range.

I'm at UAB.
Several of my line sisters are 18 or barely 19, I am almost 23. I don't have any issues with my LS's, but sometimes they want me to go to parties with them (the 18 to get in), but they understand that if I go out to a club (which is extremely rare) I prefer the 21 and up crowd. That is the only thing that is noticiable...the few of us who are 22 and another is 23 are almost never at parties. I think that the maturity thing is not an issue for me since there are other seniors on my line.

As an advisor, I always told my active members to consider the woman - not the number. I think a more mature student would be a real asset - so by all means go through rush. Do be ready to discuss why you waited to go to college - and why you think that will make you a better sister!

Great Advice
 

Thanks for all the positive advice :) I personally don't think 22 is too old, but as I've been reading, Greek life is big in the South and 22 might be too old for down where I'm headed (that makes it sound like hell lol) Im from Indiana, IU and Notre Dame are big, but I don't know anyone who goes to either thats too into sorority life...Notre Dame=huge football (obviously) and IU=party party party. Both are pretty expensive to get into, its cheaper for me to go out of state than go to either one of these two colleges that are in state for me. Anyway thats besides the point. Hopefully I'll be able to post a good recruitment thread in about a year...if not its not the end of the world and most certainly not the end all be all of college. Just seems like something that would be fun. And as I'll be going down alone, not knowing anybody, I'll most definatly have an open mind. Thanks again for the advice

as had been said in numerous other recruitment threads, please, try your hardest to secure recommendations to all the sororities at u of s. alabama.

best wishes to you!!

LOL Well...not quite, I am a Sarah though, so maybe sister to Abraham is more like it...but I'd never marry my brother. *shudders and vomits a little*

I'm transferring to USA this fall, and I plan on rushing. I don't know anyone who has been in any of the sororities there (or ones at other campuses), and I'm having a hard time finding alum. for recommendations. Since I don't know anyone, I'm worried that I might not be classy enough to join a sorority. :(

I don't think so. I think it all just depends on how well you get ot know the members of the sorority.

I have to disagree. I think it has to do with the campus culture. On some campuses (especially in the South), 22 (regardless of class standing) is too old, especially when the majority of those going through rush are 17-18 years old and sororities may look more favorably on them.

Hey definatly keep me informed on how that goes for you, maybe you can give me some tips for when I transfer a semester later lol. Where are you transferring from? You can PM me if you don't want it public.

Weither or not 22 is too old I think I'll try anyway. You never know unless you try right? Technically I'll still be 21 when I rush, but I'll turn 22 that April.

Knowing people does not make you classy! Knowing people just helps to ensure that the sororities get a clear picture of who you are and what you can add to their organization. At USA you will need recs for each sorority so make sure you exhaust every possibility to secure them. Good luck!

Booper Doo-

I don't want to seem rude, but a few things struck me from your posts that I just thought I'd mention so you don't go in thinking it's going to be a cake walk.

• Your age will likely be a factor, especially at a Deep South school. Those schools are sellers' markets and the chapters have their pick. All else being equal, a freshman will have one up on you.
• Being a transfer student at a Deep South school is also a strike against you.
• Being from Indiana (or any state other than Alabama) will likely be a strike against you. (Of course I would count it as a point in your favor, personally!)
• You mentioned the expense of IU and ND - make sure you evaluate the financial obligations of a sorority before you rush and get your heart set on one.
• You mentioned that your plans are influenced by your boyfriend. Some sororities may frown on that. I hate to say that, because it sounds like your situation is very unusual and I am very supportive of what your boyfriend is doing.

I am sure that at many schools your situation would have little or no affect on your recruitment, but the reality is that USA is Deep South, and Deep South is different. I would recommend getting great recs and also thinking of how you can sell all of your "shortcomings" as assets. Also, it seems that all the things I listed as concerns are things that are now beyond your control. Be sure that the things you CAN control, like your grades and extra-curriculars, are stellar.

Also, BTW Notre Dame has no Greek Life, but it is beyond huge at IU. That is one of the 3 largest Greek systems in the country.

if you pnms have not done so, you may want to visit the usa greeklife website. all the sororities have nice websites. be sure to check out the download on the main greek life page-it shows the suggested outfits for sorority recruitment and describes each days events.

USA
 

I just wanted to say that I know a little bit about rush at USA and from what I have observed it is not highly competitive. This is not to say that you will have your pick of groups, but I think there is a home for everyone who goes through and keeps an open mind. I don't think your age will be a huge factor there.

Hey, your not being rude. Just looking for advice here, and thats what you gave :)

I guess I should stress again, I don't come from an area where greek life is big. IU is SOUTH Indiana unless your going to a local campus like IU-south bend. In which case I compare it to Ivy Tech...which you are prolly not familar with but its a community college. There is no ANYTHING at IU-south bend. It's a very boring campus. I come from North Indiana. Different world.:o ND is in North Indiana. (as I'm sure you know). I don't know any of my classmates who went down to IU who wanted to go greek.

I honestly do not mean this in a rude way, so please don't take it that way, but comparing the cost of ND or IU to greek life is like comparing the cost of buying a mansion to renting an apartment. ND tuition is about 50 grand,(nd.edu :
Tuition and FeesRoom & BoardBooks and SuppliesPersonal ExpensesTransportationTotal
while IU is more like 20 grand (iub.edu:Tuition and fees$7,460$20,472Room and board *$5,616–$7,164$5,616–$7,164Total for Academic Year$13,076–$14,624$26,088–$27,636* Based on a double room with a full meal plan.
Other Personal Costs for an Academic YearFor new full-time undergraduatesIn-stateOut-of-stateBooks and supplies$650–$740$650–$740Personal expenses and transportation $2,400–$2,950$2,400–$2,950
Just because I can't afford these schools dosent' mean greek life at USA is out of the question...I don't know of ANY sorority that expects 50 THOUSAND dollars a year in dues.:eek: But I respect what you said about evaluating financial situation before considering rushing, because as I've said before I don't know much about greek life and until I started persuing information on it, didn't know that some dues ARE quite expensive.

Thanks for the point in my favor as for coming from Indiana :) If transferring from an Indiana school is going to affect my chances of getting into a sorority that badly, honestly its not something I want to be a part of. I fully plan on giving everyone a fair chance, and hopefully they will do the same for me. But forming an opinion of someone based on where they come from as a reason to not accept them is about as shallow as not accepting them because of their hair color. :rolleyes:

Also thanks for supporting what my boyfriend does. But this wouldnt be something I would bring up rushing, as from what I've read boys are a no no to talk about. I would give other (equally truthful) reasons as to why I didn't attend in the Fall.

Thanks for the great advice, yours is one of the best responses I have received.

Have a great day!!

P.S. sorry about the IU/ND cost part, they were tables until I posted it and it kind of got meshed together :confused:

I agree with this. It really depends on the campus you are on. I pledged at 22 and had no problem whatsoever, but had I been on other campuses in this state I would have had no chance of getting a bid because of my age and junior standing at the time.

Let me clear this up...nobody is holding your home state against you. Nobody cares that you are from Indiana or New York or Arizona. The problem is that nobody went to your high school, church, summer camp, etc., so you don't have the personal connections that other girls may have prior to rush. You may be competing with girls who already know a lot of sorority members, and you have 20 minutes to impress sorority women who have known other PNM's for years.

THIS IS WHY RECS WILL BE CRITICAL. They can not replace personal friendships with women in the houses, but they will help.

So, I know this is not always right, and it's pretty laughable since a good number of you know the ancient age I was when I went through a recruitment, but whenever I see this question, I just want to answer...

"Yes."

I've been in a pledge class with girls much much younger than me. I've had a big sister that was much much younger than me. In the south, they will be much younger than you. The seniors that you will bond with won't be there very long. You will have differences. You will want to cringe or roll your eyes often. That being said, recruitment is fun. Do it. Being in a sorority is a blast. But it is hard when you're older.

I'm from Illinois and went to U of I so I know where you're coming from regarding the differences in Indiana. As for the financial aspect - I know that Greek life is no where near as expensive as an entire college education at ND. Not knowing your personal finances, I was just bringing it up because you had mentioned finances as a concern. It sounds like you are knowledgeable about the costs associated with Greek life - too often girls get swept up in sorority life only to find out half way through their pledgeship that they can't afford to initiate. I'm glad that won't be a problem for you.

And about being from Alabama v. from Indiana. DeltaBetaBaby understood what I meant. Some southern chapters feel like out-of-state PNMs are a risk because no one can really vouch for them. Plus, some groups like to brag that they got all of the Birmingham girls or whatever the city-of-choice is. At some schools, taking out-of-state girls is looked down on. That always seemed silly to me, because at Illinois it was really cool to get out-of-state girls. But, as we've established, the south is just different. Mostly though, a good rec will help negate your out-of-state status since they will have that chance to know more about you.

As for the boys thing - you have obviously done your homework since you know not to talk about boys!

Good luck!

Ahh, just letting DeltaBetaBaby know, I did read your response before I got to this one, and thanks for the clarification, I honestly didn't think about it that way...just got in defense mode. :o

I wondered if you were from up arounds here irishpipes, my cousin was at U of I for awhile I think. Thats kind of funny taking pride in accepting all people from one paticular area. I had something somewhat mean about that to write here...but I'll bite my tounge (or fingers?) as I don't personally know anyone in said groups to be mean about it. I've noticed this question popping up alot since I joined, and I'm sure there were hundreds before mine. It's not a big deal to me if I don't go greek, so I truely won't be too heartbroken if for whatever reason (I'm too old...too Northern...too random...I have green eyes...) I don't get in. Who knows :)

Thanks again for the great advice :D Have a great day

It IS possible, but as others have pointed out, at a Deep South school it's not necessarily a guarantee (not that it is anywhere, but it really may be more difficult).
I'm not in the Deep South--just in Florida--but there were 3 girls in my new member class that were 21 and turned 22 shortly after initiation. They were all at junior standing.
The rest of the girls were between 18 and 20, mostly freshmen and sophomores.
A lot of schools look down on taking upperclassmen, but the age may not be a factor if you just mention the fact that you're a sophomore.
I defintely think if you open up about your situation, they will be understanding.
Definitely, as it has been suggested, get as many recs as you can so these women can learn as much about you as possible before you go into the homes.
Best of luck!

I am 36 years old and I am pursuing my goal of membership with everything that I have in me. I live in New York and attend a local college, so I do not face the 'campus' issues that you will encounter. My biggest challenge is not being available for every activity that I possibly can because I am a single mom and cannot always work around my son. My biggest fear is not being considered 'real' by any sisters (when I make membership) because of my age or because I didn't attend a 'campus' school. You'll notice that I said 'when', not 'if' cause if it takes me til 76 yrs old, I'll never stop. Like IrishPipes said, I can only do what I can control with all the excellence that I can muster.

If you don't have any children yet, you have the availability to be as active as you need to be. Enjoy your entire college experience, especially the bonuses of "campus life" and definitely rushing.

I wish you every success and will put up a prayer for us both!! Please, keep us updated!:)

Thanks hun, and the best of luck to you as well :) I'll keep you in my thoughts and hope that you update as well!!

might not matter...
 

Well, all this questioning about age might not matter too much as I have been looking at information on Spring recruitment for USA...and haven't found ANYTHING. Is this something I would normally be able to find easily? I just found that the only information I can find anything on (including stats on GC for recruitment) is for Fall. And by the Fall I will (unless my credits fall JUST short) be a junior. Though I will most likely be there for more than the traditional 4 years (My major *to be usuful in the field I want to go into* requires min of 6 years).

Anyone have any input?

They may only have COB rush in the spring. It means "continuous open bidding" and it means that the groups who did not pledge quota in the fall can still have informal rush in the spring. If this is the case, and I don't know that it is, it might make is harder for you because know one will know you to invite you. You'll have to work harder to get to know the women in the groups.

I'm not saying this in terms of the sorority thing because I don't know how important it is in the long term, but are you sure you need to take a semester off to be with your boyfriend? If he is that big a part of your life that you'd postpone your education for him, why wouldn't you choose to attend college closer to him to begin with?

ETA: Reading this hours later, I realize that I'm really overstepping with my second paragraph, but what you've said here and what you said in the GPA thread made me think that you might not be making the best systematic decisions about your education. I know it's none of my business, but doing things the way that you've described is really limiting your options and if you take a semester off because of the boyfriend's return, you may be compromising joining a GLO if that's really important to you.

I'm pretty sure USA has something like that, but I think that is ends up being only 4 girls or less for each that does it group. Like Alphagamuga said, if they don't reach quota, I guess. I'm not completely sure, I don't go there yet. Most of the people that I know that go there are guys :rolleyes:. Only one of my friends actually rushed at USA, and didn't get a bid.

Not overstepping
 

It's ok, your not overstepping. Its a legit question given what limited information you have on me. I'm not really taking a semester off, I'm going to school here. I'm just not transferring down to USA in the fall, because I haven't seen my boyfriend in a year, and he won't be coming home until the beginning of August. Right when you need to be transferring down to go through formal rush and all that (as I've read on their site, they have a mother/daughter event August 11th...*ha, my bf's birthday*) to introduce them to campus life and all. I want to be able to spend time with him, but I'm not throwing off education for it. I'm just not transferring until Spring. Still going to school

Thanks for the explanation of COB, have been wondering. And for the really great responses in both threads as well as the re-read of your reply to this. As said before, your not overstepping, but I thank you for the kind reply :)

How weird, my boyfriend's birthday falls during rush week as well. Just thought that was interesting.

I know for us age is not really a question. We don't normally ask or talk about that at all during recruiment. We may ask what year you are, but there are some girls who are very ahead, and some who are behind. During our spring recruitment we had a girl who was 27 come through. She's amazing and she pledged, and she hangs out with us younger girls just like she is one. It's all in YOUR mentality and how you come across. to me, 22 is NOT that old!

That is pretty interesting. My bf will be 22 that week. If yours is the same we should definatly talk. LOL

I wondered if it would come up, but I figured they would have that info on me anyhow. Glad to hear that it worked out for someone who wasn't the traditional age to pledge :)

Am I too old to join
 

:confused: Hello out there. This is my first time posting so please help me if I'm doing something wrong. I'll be going to CSUS in the Fall of 07 and I would really like to join a sorority but I feel like I'm too old. I had to wait to return to college and I never got to fullfill my dreams of joining a sorority. I don't want to look stupid trying to join but I feel like if don't try then I'll never know if I could've be a sister. Does anyone have any advice for this lost sole? I also wanted to know about starting a new chapter or sorority on the campus of CSUS. Is anyone tring to start a new chapter and need members or does anyone have any information about starting one out.:o Someone help your girl out:)

Welcome to GC.

It's really hard to know if you're too old without knowing how old you are. Generally it would depend on the campus. I don't imagine Recruitment at CSUS is ultra competitive, but since I didn't go there I'm no authority.

Starting a new group is a huge undertaking. Why not check out what CSUS already has to offer first. There are several sororities already on campus: NPC, NPHC, Multicultural, etc. Take a look:

http://www.csus.edu/studentactivities/clubs_soro.htm

Good luck!

COR and overall maturity
 

As others mentioned, Coninuous Open Recruitment may be a good option for you, although you may have to take the initiative on this. It sounds like, on several fronts, it may be a good idea to contact the Panhellenic Recruitment Chair at USA, with a letter of introduction, request for information about formal recruitment and COR, advice about getting recommendations, etc.

Here is prime opportunity for your maturity to come through -- YOU've taken initiative and thought through how to achieve your objective -- skills any chapter would welcome, and you show self confidence, again, score!

In your letter of introduction, paint an honest picture of yourself, while also MANAGING YOUR OWN PRESS! Set the tone for the positives (as others in this thread encouraged) you bring, before others can view them as negatives. Also, ask questions about academics and GPA standings and importance, about philanthropic involvement on the community by the various Sororities, about relationships between Greek life and campus life, administration and the larger town community, about panhellenic involvement and activities and how people get involved, etc. These types of questions show you've researched Greek life, you take it seriously and you want to be involved.

Perhaps you could ask if, when you go for a visit, if you could meet her (Pahel Recruitment) and/or others. Maybe if she might even have any time to give you a tour or to meet you for coffee. Don't be offended if she says "no," and also be clear SHE HAS TO BE NEUTRAL and is NOT the key to a bid.

If you do this, though, and have expressed your interested in COR, you can ask her to make sure the chapters have your name for invites to COR events, and without actually influencing any chapter actual decisions for recruitment, she (at least personally) would be influenced by your committment and could potentially stem any negative tide that might develop from your out-of-state and/or older status. And, hey, now you know a Sorority sister at USA!

For formal (esp.) and even COR, STUDY! Study harder than you even would for exams. KNOW colors and history. KNOW 1-2 famous alums from each group and why you admire them. Turn the questions to the sisters about how proud they must be to have so&so as one of their alums. Are there others they can tell you about?

Good luck.

I am a new member and I am going to be 22 this Aug, my girls didn't have a problem with my age. I think that it is more a question of when you are going to be graduating.

I dont know about sororities, but there is a fraternity on this campus that initiated men in their late thirties this year.

And where you go to school.

i don't think so at all...one of my line sisters is 29 (!), and we just crossed this semester. it's all about finding an organization you will be comfortable in and that will be comfortable with you.

also, what are you taking at USA? my stepmom is an OT instructor there...just wondering!