Becoming a Fraternity Sweetheart
 

I'm a freshman and a few of my sisters have been named Pi Kappa Alpha's Garnet Gir, Beta Theta Pi roses, etc.

My question is (and it's probably a stupid one): how do you get that title? Are there certain things the fraternity looks for and if so, what are they?

Thanks!

TSteven posted helpful Sweetheart of Sigma Chi information here.

I imagine most fraternities select their sweethearts in a similar fashion.

Lots of sweetheart-related posts recently...hmmm....

This is by no means a definitive list and may include many other attributes depending on the specific fraternity, chapter and campus.

Campus activity, activity within the chapter, general achievements, community service, academic performance, character, personality and public speaking abilities. Most candidates are encouraged to have a firm understanding of the values and ideals the Fraternity.

FYI: Many of the Sigma Chi chapter sweethearts I've had the pleasure of meeting are (biological/step) daughters, sisters and even cousins of Sigma Chis. All being upstanding, well accomplished, and intelligent ladies.

I was wondering about this too. Must be selection time for a lot of chapters.

With few exceptions, they are dating someone in the fraternity. On a lot of campuses, they are in a sorority with which the fraternity has good relations or would like to have good relations.

I was unaware that there still were "Sweet Heart" programs.
SAE dropped "Little Sisters" years ago, in part due to RM issues.

My friends in three different fraternities have told me that sweethearts are chosen based on how close the girl is with the guys in the chapter (but they NEVER choose a sweetheart who is dating one of the guys), looks, and how well they do in their interview. Also, the gifts they bring up during their interview plays a big part.

It seems wild to me that in some fraternities, this is something that's 'campaigned' for.

I was chosen to be a Sweetheart because I wasn't the girl getting drunk and making a fool of herself at the parties, showing as much skin as I could possibly show, wasn't making out in some corner, etc. I presented myself in a respectable way and I looked out for the guys who were at the time just my friends.

But, I'm sure that's not how it is in all other fraternities. Haha.

sorry to yell, but for the ookabillionth time...
 

SWEETHEARTS AND LITTLE SISTERS ARE TWO TOTALLY DIFFERENT THINGS. SWEETHEARTS ARE TO LITTLE SISTERS AS APPLES ARE TO SOCKS.

A sweetheart is one person chosen by the fraternity in an honorary capacity. There is no such thing as a sweetheart "program." It's like being a homecoming queen or something similar.

Little sisters go through a pledge program and function as an auxiliary group to the fraternity.

Meh. "Love is in the air..."

--is holding back a gag at how sappy that was

News to me-thank you for the information.

"Little Sisters" type programs were all that I ever heard of in any way, shape or form. First, second or third hand.

But I still have to wonder about RM/liability risks and issues. But that thread would be better off in the RM section.

IIRC, we started our Little Sister program about now and announced during our Spring Formal.

No Sigma Chi Sweetheart (chapter or International) is now - nor ever has been - a member of Sigma Chi Fraternity. Thus there are no Risk Management or liability issues per say.

There could be issues just like there could be issues for a House Mother living in the chapter house. Or an employee at IHQ. But again, to be clear, Sweethearts are not members of the Fraternity at all. Nor or they considered "sisters". Little or otherwise.

To the very best of my knowledege, there has been only one (1) woman member of SAE.

"Little Sisters" were not members as such.

The RM issue came up years ago and I just do not recall what the reasons were.

I don't recall the specifics (Title IX maybe?), but my understanding is that the "risk" has to do with federal law regarding keeping social GLOs single sex. A fraternity with an auxiliary group ("little sisters") that is recognized by the fraternity could open the door to the fraternity loosing that single sex status.

That risk (loss of single sex status) does not exist with having a chapter sweetheart.

The risk explained
 

My understanding of the risk in having little sister groups is related to how women became little sisters. Little sisters groups at some schools were formed much like any other "sorority" in that members were recruited and then "pledged". I have heard several tales of sexual favors or related activities for the fraternity men being a "requirement" to become a little sister. I have heard of groups where the women were treated as "servants" to the men in order to gain selection. There was bviously nothing honorable about being a little sister with these groups.

In terms of the law, if it looks like a duck and walks like a duck, it can be called a duck. Just because a little sister group are not initiated members, does not mean that fraternity will assume no liability for their actions. If they wear letters, if they wear t-shirts and do activities in the name of being a little sister of the fraternity, the fraternity can be held liable. Discouraging little sister/brother groups is one way to limit liability for the fraternity or sorority.

Heather and Steve;
The matter may or may not be some sort of a combination of both your posts. As I indicated, I just do not recall the details at all. Just a very vague image of it relating to RM more than anything else.

As for your posting Heather, I have very little doubt that somewhere, at some school or chapter that did go . Just as I have very little doubt that it goes on without the "cover" of Little Sister or Sweetheart:( :eek:

And I will say say that to the best of my knowledge it did not go on at my chapter. And any activities that did happen, were consensual and not part of the selection proccess.

And my best friend to this day from College is my "Big Sister".:)

Actually TSteven is right, the biggest risk is/was Title IX related. Little sisters threatened fraternities' single sex status.

Some little sister programs weren't run honorably, but some were more organized than the fraternities OR some of the sororities. It varied greatly from group to group, school to school - same as NPC sororities and NIC fraternities. When all little sisters are characterized as sluts or servants it pisses me off no end, as some of my best friends in college were fraternity little sisters. It was usually sorority women who spread those rumors - I'm guessing because they were jealous at the proximity the little sisters enjoyed. :rolleyes:

I don't want to see the late, great "Little Sister" program given a bad rap. I'm truly sorry to see it go.

I was a "Little Sister of the Shield" at Phi Delta Theta. It was a fabulous program. At the University of Florida, there was indeed Little Sister Rush. The fraternities held themed rush parties (similar to the informal rush parties the sororities held). There were "casino nights," "western night" etc.

Since the UF programs were quite regulated, I had never heard of any of the Little Sisters from any of the fraternities being labeled in any derogatory manner. The school's Interfraternity Council kept a pretty close eye on these programs.

Women were given a bid.. but there was no "pledging" per se. You became a Little Sister when asked. My group did hold a Little Sister initiation. It was more of a fun event hosted by the older sisters for the new sisters coming in.

The programs were very reputable. The little sisters were treated like gold, not like "slaves". The sisters were invited to dinner once a week, were invited to all fraternity parties, and most events. I remember going to the beach with them, swimming at a sink hole, and going water skiing. We were never asked to "clean the house" or act as "rush bait." It just didn't go on.

I just feel very fortunate to have been a part of this program. It's too bad it's not allowed anymore. Not only did I make new friends (I'm still in touch with one of the brothers-- he's married and has two kids now), but I met some fabulous women who I never would have met had I not joined the program.

UF ended the Little Sister program in the early 90s, soon after I graduated. BlueAngel, I'm guessing you were a little sister in the 70s-80s? It was a different world back then. But even still, the program still was as organized as you had described.

[QUOTE=33girl;1394657] It was usually sorority women who spread those rumors - I'm guessing because they were jealous at the proximity the little sisters enjoyed. QUOTE]

Actually, a good majority of little sisters WERE sorority women. It was a big deal at our house to have a bunch of members as little sisters to certain fraternities.

It was the 1980's.
What do you mean by "different world" back then? Not arguing.. just curious about what, specifically, you mean?

I was a Beta little sister for about 2-3 months of my freshman year (basically in the couple of months prior to sorority rush that was in November that year), and though it was completely harmless for me, I can imagine how it could get really shady. All we did was go to the Beta parties...we were like recruiting tools to make the guys look cool prior to rush. There wasn't any fooling around that I knew of (other than the occasional random date/hook up)...most of the girls were planning on rushing and didn't want to hurt their chances. But, I could see freshmen girls especially being vulnerable to pressure in situations with older fraternity guys.

I think my freshman year was the last year of fraternity little sisters at my school...it was heavily frowned upon by our panhellenic, and it was a hangover from the old local greek system anyway. But, as others have pointed out, Sweethearts, or pageants like "Kappa King" that's held at my school, are still going strong and they're completely different from auxillary groups.

On our campus one of the little sister programs was almost entirely made up of women from a certain sorority. They were usually little sisters first then pledged the sorority. So obviously they were all cool with it. Some sorority women were just completely against it though - and to be fair, there were little sisters who were pretty anti-sorority. Two of the fraternities didn't allow their little sisters to be in sororities which I think is where the animosity came from.

- Girls that hung out a lot at the house and were friends with the group, or girls that dated one of the guys were usually made Little Sisters. They came from all sorority houses, and some were non-greek even. We had a ceremony for them and everything. All formal and stuff at the house.
- They usually got a Lil' Bro from the pledge class.
- At the end of the year, before the White Star Formal, we had a vote at meeting. That was how the years Sweetheart was determined. The week of the vote was greatness as there were cookies, and other baked goods brought to the house by the front-runners daily :)
- Sweetheart was announced at the Formal. My Junior (or senior?) year my gf got Sweetheart. Had to stuff all those roses in my car... She was also on the composite for that year. ;)

Kappa Sweetheart
 

does anyone really know the process to become a kappa sweetheart?? is it as intense as it is like pledging..i really would love to be a sweet. what are the do's and do not's if anyone knows. tHANKS

This (two-year-old) thread is not about those types of sweethearts.