panhellenic age limits
 

edited.

the only age-limit thing i've ever seen is (i think) that to be a member of chi omega you have to be at least 14. i'm pretty sure there aren't age limits, beings how my friend's school allowed a 39 year old woman to register for recruitment.

39? wow...i wonder how that will turn out...

As long as a woman is on her FIRST undergrad degree, I don't think Pan-Hel can impose any age limit, other then the one mentioned for Chi-O, that they have to be at least 14 - and even then I think they would still have to let the 13-year-old super-genius rush, but her options would be limited (as would a 39 year old woman).

I dunno John - how DOES that 13-year-old super-genius at undergrad rush work??;) ;)

While a chapter could have limits (or just feel uncomfortable about pledging someone a lot older). I don't think Panhel can.

So I agree with all of the above. :) Someone who's 25 and is more of a traditional student (stretching the definition a bit) would have a better shot than a 39 year old non-traditional student. But that's all campus culture and such.

I agree that it's a matter of campus culture. If a school has a high percentage of non-traditional students, I'm sure that age doesn't matter as much as it would in a very conservative, traditional college. With that said, I don't see a 37-year old with a child getting a bid at most colleges.

There is NO age limit on going through rush, and I'm guessing not to join any sororities either (unless it's a minimum, not a maximum). If there was, the NPC sororities and national Panhellenic would be in a world of trouble and age discrimination lawsuits.

We have a 25 year old new member this fall and she is an amazing addition to our chapter!!! Also, a few years back another chapter on campus pledged a 40+ year old woman, mainly because she was a legacy of sorts. Her daughter was a member of the chaper a few years prior. She obviously wasn't very active in the chapter, but it is possible to get a bid...

The 40+ year old woman went through rush and initiated as a collegian? Interesting. Personally, I wouldn't extend a bid to someone I knew wouldn't be active with the chapter. I'd save that space for someone who actually wants to be there.

While your campus culture allows for non-traditional aged women to go through rush and possibly get a bid, the same thing can't be said everywhere else.

That's what I was getting ready to say. I know the age issue has been discussed on here before, and there's not just one answer. On my campus, for example, there was a 26-year-old who went through recruitment one year and everyone in my chapter was talking about it. We just couldn't believe someone that old would go through! That's because where I went to school, most ladies rushed and pledged as freshmen or sophomores and it was practically unheard of for older students to join. Now, at other schools, it's obviously different.

I am now giggling at "that old". I understand the context and thus the surprise, but I would love to be "that old" again!

Enjoy your youth!! :)

Yes. While 26 or 27 isn't that old at some schools, I will say that this woman most likely will not get a bid to any sorority at UCF. It's harsh but it's reality. Rush is competitive and the chapters can afford to be picky as to who they bid since there's almost 1,000 smart, beautiful, young girls going through.

I remember in 2001 the chapter at ASU actually took a member who was 21 or 22. She was a freshman, just started college and decided to rush. She stayed involved until she got married a few years later (and then decided to go alum, although I'm pretty sure (but don't quote me) ADPi does allow a sister to be married and stay active, but I'm not 100% sure on that :D). I've seen her at some alum events, so she is still somewhat active.

Well, keep in mind this was coming from a bunch of 18-22 year olds. :p A bunch of 18-22 year olds who had mostly pledged before age 20, I might add. 26 sure doesn't seem old now, but it did then! Heh heh.

Hey, if a 26 yo wants to embrace sisterhood, and finds a mutual fit in her ideals, interests, etc., I think it's great. But I totally understand how it might feel weird on both sides. I think the idea of such an age difference will often reflect in a person's lifestyle, habits, goals, etc. Perhaps an older rushee/pledge might not have had the opportunity to go to college at a typical age. But I imagine that this very same person might feel uncomfortable taking direction (note I didn't say orders) from girls 8 years younger.

That being said, it might be cool to have someone as a "big sister (like real life), more experienced" type of sister in your organization, bc she can draw upon life experiences and share them with the rest of the house/chapter.

But again, there should be a mutual fit; and while it might not necessarily be an age issue, it might an issue in terms of generational differences and the fact that the "typical" collegiates "grow up" together in college. Much of sisterhood is the sharing of new experiences, personal growth, and learning more about who you are an who you want to become. In that case, I can see where it would not be a good mutual fit.

Forgive my rambling.

Has this PNM thought about how she might feel as a pledge sister of mostly 18-19 year olds? If she rushes at 26-27 and receives a bid, she will most likely be older than not just her pledge sisters, but also the upperclassmen and officers. She might be fine with that, but I know that it might make me a little uncomfortable to pledge if I was that much older than my chapter sisters. But hey, if it doesn't make her uncomfortable, I say she should go for it!

As for having officers younger than you...if you have issues with someone younger (but COMPETENT) giving you orders or making rules, that sounds like an attitude problem. Will you not take a job because the boss is younger than you? That's not common, but it's not unheard of. It's also kind of along the lines of a man not wanting to take orders from a woman. If someone is competent in what they do, it shouldn't matter what their background is.

I agree! It certainly is reality. Within the last decade, I can personally remember several older PNM's going through at UCF and not receiving bids. There was one particular older PNM who tried going through formal a couple times and then tried to COB at practically every house that participated. I'm not saying that it's right that someone in this situation not be given a fair chance, but that's simply the reality of UCF recruitment. It's too competitive of a situation for a house to give up a place for a potential 4-year member to someone who may not be able to commit as much time or energy.

All of this being said, I can see how someone at that age who is "young at heart" or living a typical college life style might choose to expand themselves with sorority membership. I can also see how important that PNM's attitude and presentation would impact their ability to actually be extended a bid.

I was a 23 year old freshman when I became a colony member of Alpha Xi Delta. I didnt have the opportunity to be an 18 year old freshman - had to get that 4 years of military out of the way first. And even though I'm older than the next oldest sister by over 3 years, none of the girls treat me any different. They still respect me as a sister. The most depressing thing though, is we took on a new member this year who JUST celebrated her 18th birthday. Good lord, I'm 4 weeks shy of being 8 years older than her. Dig the knife a little deeper! :p

Now, I will say that when I colonized, we had a 35 year old single mom also colonize with us. She dropped before Installation, but I will say that with her, it was a burden, and a HUGE hassel. She wanted to be our mother, and not our sister. Everytime we made plans to do something it was always "I dont have time for that, I have a child at home..." and it was a huge pain in the ass to have to make plans around her child. We would have, and could have, worked with her, but she finally realized that her child was a bigger priority in her life than sorority (as it SHOULD have been) and she dropped. Fortunately, for the rest of us, the tension in the colony left with her. We actually began to feel like a sisterhood after that...

I think amanda6035 definitely makes a good point here! If you have similar priorities and are at a similar place in life as your pledge sisters, it can be a great experience regardless of pledging age. However, if you're enough older that your priorities are totally different (like the 35 year old) it can be really hard to enjoy your membership... I mean, can you imagine the hassle of being fined for missing chapter every time you had a commitment for your child?

That's basically what I was trying to say earlier. If this PNM is at a similar place in life as her potential sisters, I would totally encourage her to rush... but if she feels that she is enough older that she might feel out of place or as though her priorities were totally different from those of the girls in her chapter, it might not be the right experience for her.

In my pledge class, we had a married mom who was in her late 20s. It did cause some issues when we needed to do certain things as a pledge class... without everyone present, some activities/goals could not be completed. It did cause a strain within our class, but we were able to overcome it.

I think the most important thing is that the PNM has the same level of commitment/time/energy/availability as any other in the potential pledge class. Every situation is different.

Believe it or not, we had a 25 year old in our chapter in the late 90s-- but she was the rare exception. She had been in the military and then came to UCF. She was incredibly stunning-- absolutely beautiful and fun-- and I think she was definitely the exception to the rule. She also had a long time BF and while she followed chapter obligations and came to the date parties, she wasn't very, very active. I think by your mid-20s you really don't want to hang out with a group when the median age is 20.

It's interesting the difference in recruitment from place to place, even on something like age.
It was a big deal this year that we had a lot of sophmores go through rush, and a couple juniors instead of almost all freshman.
I'm pretty sure at Purdue it would be nearly impossible for someone older than 21 to recieve a bid from any of the 15 houses here; it was hard for the few girls that were rushing as juniors even to get a bid, and almost unheard of to have a senior rushing this year.
It might be in part how large and competetive our greek system is, but a lot of houses also have a concern with difference in maturity and years of commitment that an older memeber would be able to put into the house.
We had a junior on our list before rankings for pref day and it caused a huge debate over whether she would be able to live with girls two years younger than her her senior year (she would be one of the only seniors living in), and her ability to contribute to the house in just one year.
So I guess it's a case by case thing, but I've noticed that the standards here for older women to get into the house is significantly higher than those going through as a freshman and make it very very hard for anyone rushing after sophmore year to get a bid through formal recruitment

we had a 28 year old go through formal recruitment this year, and she really seemed very enthusiastic about it too. however, she was MARRIED and even if she wasn't, there were far more 18 year old freshman that were just as enthusiastic and could fill her spot.... so needless to say, she didnt get called back to any of the sororities the next day.

Maybe I read your post wrong, but from what I understand basically every sorority discriminated against her because she was married and 28 and therefore cut her.

If the school allowed her to rush and the individual sororities don't have "rules" against it (like a rule that said no married women or a chapter rule saying that a new member can't be older than 25, etc...), she could claim discrimination.

I'm not saying that if she filed a discrimination lawsuit that she would have a "slam dunk" win, I'm just saying she could probably do it (sue).

People sue for lamer reasons than discrimination. (Remember the women who put her HOT coffee between her legs, than spilled it and then sued Mcdonalds for her stupidity, what was worse is that she won).

However she has no proof that this was why she was not invited back. People have tried that before, but this is why no one is supposed to know why they're not invited back.

She does if she reads this thread.

Kinda. There's only a representative of one chapter on here, probably not enough to make a lawsuit work but yeah I know what you're saying.

That's an extremely condescending thing to say. You have NO IDEA what this woman's status was, or whether she would have enjoyed being in the chapter. Everyone is different. Age is only a number.

That's like you going into a store and them refusing to sell you a pair of pants and saying "this is for your own good, you wouldn't like them or look good in them."

Some groups force married women to go alum, but not all (thank God). And I would bet even in those groups where it is "policy" that there are chapters who ignore it, because it's a really stupid rule.

We give married sisters the OPTION of becoming an alum. It's not required. Not sure about other chapters' rules.

"It's for her own good" IS offensive no matter how much collegians think that married women don't have time for sororities.

/Ewww Marriage cooties

Your last sentence tickled me but so very true.

It does probably help that you were in said sorority in college. I kind of wonder how difficult it would be to relate if you were just starting college at 28 or so and had already been married/kids etc. It's certainly not impossible, but I think it would seem weird that these 18-22 year olds are in a completely different place in their lives.

You know, shouldn't you be with your husband instead of on GC all day? :p

/Don't hit me!

I agree.

I sometimes wonder why an older/married woman would want to go through recruitment on campuses that have mostly 18-22 year old sorority women. My chapter had a girl a few years ago that ended up taking 6.5 years to graduate and she said that it was sometimes hard being 25 and trying to relate to the freshmen sisters. I'd imagine it would be even worse if a woman had tons of life experiences (marriage, children) that none of her sisters shared.

Don't get me wrong, I think any chapter would benefit from bidding an older PNM. It just seems like it would end up being a bad deal for the older PNM! I think I'd honestly go crazy if I were 30 and I had to deal with things like recruitment t-shirt drama or neverending mock rock practices.

I think for me it would be encouraging chapters to move away from the thought that "oh their married" or "oh their 28" as a reason to cut a woman. You have to look at what the other stuff. Do you think she would be a good fit? Tell her about the time committments and ask her if she is willing to committ. I think we tend to forget that actives don't have to attend the date parties or the dances or stuff like that. They do have to go to chapters, philanthropy events, pledge class stuff (as a pledge). But if they don't want to put forth the extra effort they don't technically have to (although they won't really get to know the sisters well if they don't, it seems).

If the PNM understands, than who is to say because she is 28 and married that she wouldn't be an excellent sister. (The same goes for single women with kids). We don't look at the color of the PNM's skin or their religion as a basis for cuts, why should we look at if they have a wedding band on their finger or a kid for that matter? (Now obviously, if the sorority has rules against taking members who are married or with kids in their bylaws, this "theory" of mine wouldn't apply :D).

I'm kind of rambling and I'm not sure if I'm making any sense. I apologize. Long day doing a school improvement plan (for actually the last three days and not done yet), so I'm a little exhausted. :D

I guess I should say upfront that I'm not in favor of discrimination* in general. However, it's not surprising to me that at a many campuses where the majority of new member classes are 18 year old fresh-out-of-high-school kids, a 28 year old married woman would have a hard time getting a bid. Decisions about releases are made for pretty superficial reasons, not that that's a good thing, but something that seems at all atypical might get you cut.

As far as the "she could sue" idea, it's probably harder to really assess that we can do here. It's much more likely, in my opinion, that the groups would get in trouble with the university or their national group for violating their own non-discrimination rules.

As bad as it might seem sometimes, fully private groups on their own retain the "right" to discriminate.

At some campuses, despite the proclaimed values of the groups, meeting and dating hotties are the central reasons people go greek. If that's an important part of the system, many group members are going to find it weird that married folks rush.

I agree that it would be cool for groups to get beyond that.

*I'm being obsessive, but I want to clarify that on some level discrimination just has to do with telling differences or treating things differently. Generally, when people use the term they have in mind discrimination based on race, gender, age, nationality, etc. Obviously, I think that kind of discrimination is wrong. But I'm in favor of discriminating between people that I know who are idiots and people that I who are awesome. The faster you do it, the better.

Believe me, I've seen some 18 year olds that act more like old non-fun married people where their boyfriends are concerned than 28 (or heck, 38) year olds. I'm sure there are some cute young girls who got pledged at the school that cut this 28 year old who have turned out to be as much fun as a root canal.

HAH! I cannot freakin' STAND it when a girl says "oh my boyfriend won't let me..." or "my boyfriend wont like that..." blah blah blah. Hello, I'm the old Mama Hen in my chapter, and i'm engaged and my fiance doesnt stop me or prevent me from doing anything that I want to with the chapter. We had one girl quit last year because she was styuck so far up her boyfriends ass that it was a relief. She was a damn prude. :rolleyes:

I agree with an earlier post that there isn't no right or wrong answer to this question... there are certainly exceptions to the rule and not all 18 year olds are fun and energetic...

I pledged my sorority at the age of 18... in fact I was the second youngest in my class! I am very active... however, the oldest girl in my pledge class is 25, but she pledged when she was 23... she's very active when she can be... but work is very important to her... which shows her dedication...

There were rumors about a 42 year old woman going through recruitment at my school this year. I think she registered, but I didn't see her at any parties...

I think that there shouldn't be limitations to going through recruitment... as long as the person understands that they may or may not get a bid considering the circumstances and considerations of age, scholastic aptitude, campus/community involvement, character, ratio of Freshmen/Sophomores/Juniors/Seniors going through recruitment, etc...:)

ditto.


We have a few international students who are a little older--only about a year or two--and I would never have guessed that they were older because they're just as fun and down to earth as anyone else.

I would say a bigger drawback would be her class in school (a senior) than her age. Plus, you're never required to tell anyone how old you are. My school didn't give out birthdays (maybe others do?) and I think it would have been pretty tacky if someone asked her age in the middle of round one.