Recs
 

Hello everybody, I am currently a senior in high school and I've heard that many sororities prefer rushees who have recs from alumni. My problems: I don't know many alumni, nor am I a legacy. My question is, what do I need to do in order to get these? There is no local Panhellenic office that I'm aware of, and I'd like to be well prepared to rush for the sorority that I am interested in. If anybody could help me I would be so appreciative.

The way my sorority works, we do take into consideration any recommendations that the alums may have, but the most important part is the chemistry that we have with a rushee during our rush parties. True, girls with recommendations have an edge, but that's not all that matters.

We had an instance where a girl came to us with a recommendation from an alum. Her high school record was stellar and she looked like a well rounded person. When rush time came, however, she had the "I don't really want to be here" personality. She came to one round and that's it. Needless to say she didn't receive a bid. She was basically rushing as a favor to a friend of her mother's (one of our alums). I don't know what you could do to meet alumnae prior to rush, and honestly, I really wouldn't suggest that. My only suggestion would be to go through rush and be yourself. That's what we all stress during rush period. If you be yourself, the sororities will see that, and that could be the beginning of something special! Keep us posted okay?

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*I'm an Alpha Gam...Yes I am, Yes I am!*

what college will you be rushing at?

Hi Twinstars, I'll be rushing at the University of Alabama. (I've read a couple of other threads, and it looks like I'm not the only one!) http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif Where are you from?

I'm from Ozark, that's only about an hour away. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif I've visited TSU and it's so pretty. What part of AL are you from? About asking around, I do feel a little wierd about it because if I asked someone, would they think I was only trying to use them for a recommendation??? I don't know, I would think that people would be funny about that type of thing.

orchid2 - http://www.npcwomen.com should have a list of the recognized alumnae Panhellenics. Check it out and see what the one is nearest to you. (Plan-ahead commendation for you for checking this out while you still have a semester to go!) Good Luck!

hey Orchid- In my chapter, recommendations are very important. I didn't know that before I went through Rush, but thankfully I was able to get a rec for each sorority. My advice is to try and get as many as possible, because they can only help you. Some sororities won't give rushees a bid without a rec from an alum, whether they love her or not. It's just their decision, and every sorority is different. So just ask around and find out if your teachers and family friends were in sororities, I bet you'll be happy to find out that some of them were and you just didn't know! Good Luck, I'm sure everything will work out for the best. Keep me posted on how everything is going! By the way are you from Alabama, if so what part? I'm from Alabama also and I attend Troy State Unniversity. Bye!

orchid2- Alot of my sorority sisters, including my little sister, are from Ozark. I'm sure you know them. E-mail me @ blondie9796@yahoo.com. About you feeling weird about asking people to write recs, I understand. I know that Dothan has an alum association, I'm not sure about Ozark. I know some people won't write a rec if they don't really know you, and some will. If you know people who have graduated from TSU, find out if they were in sororities. I wish you lots of luck! I hope you enjoy U of Alabama!!

Hi orchid!
33girl is right on the money - it's great that you are thinking about this right now. Typically you would register with the Panhellenic alumnae group in your area to begin with, which is a great way to get recs. Also, you might let your HS counselor know that you are planning to rush -- he/she could then let faculty who are Greek know.

There are also the following venues:
employers, parents' friends, relatives, older classmates from your HS...

I do not recommend ASKING anyone to write a recommendation for you. It can really put someone on the spot. The way to handle it most tactfully and gracefully is to mention that you are going to be rushing at Alabama. (and since you are approaching your senior spring you will have plenty of openings to work that info into conversation, since everyone and their dog is going to be asking you if you are excited about college!!!!)

Then they will take it from there!
Good luck - be sure to let us know how it turns out!

Hey orchid! I will be rushing at Alabama next year too! E-mail me Ü

orchid2-
Hi! I am the state rush information chairman for Connecticut and the sororities contact me and I get the recommendations for the girls. This is just for my sorority but I am sure each sorority would have a chairman that gathers the needed information for them. Our website lists the chairmen for each state -maybe the others do too and you can have reference letters sent directly to that chairman. With us- it is perfectly acceptable to do that. Good luck! Write me if you need any help!

Hi Orchid--

It can be very helpful if you have a recommendation, because the chapter can get to know who you are even before you show up for the first Rush party.

I can't blame you for wanting to ask around; it can be awkward. I do think it pays off, in the end, though.

Bama (being Southern) will look more favorably on a recommendation than a Midwestern school will. Recs are more "necessary" in the South than in any other region, for whatever reason.

Look into finding each sorority's rec chair in your area . . . you should be able to find these on each sorority's website. (Kappa Kappa Gamma can be found at www.kappa.org)

Best of luck to you! I hope you find what you're looking for. The only advice I can offer you, is this: when you're at those beautiful houses, looking all spiffy in your best outfit, try to imagine whether or not you would feel comfortable in your pajamas--with the actives, in that house--because you really want to pledge the place that feels the most comfortable.

Panhellenically,
imsohappythatiama



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Oh, Kappa Kappa Kappa Gamma,
I'm so happy that I am a
Kappa Kappa Kappa Gamma,
Nobody knows . . . how
happy I am!

This is totally true, although I haven't figured out exactly why. When I was a senior (I'm from North Florida, aka "Lower Alabama"), the ladies from our local Panhellenic came to talk to all interested senior girls about Panhel recs and Rush registration (I had a HUGE manila envelope full of stuff). I was slightly overprepared for Rush at my school (in New England), as I found out later on. My school doesn't even use the recommendations, if they receieve any at all. I'm glad I sent them in, however, because the sororities on campus knew about me before recruitment(our rush isn't until February).

about recs being important at southern schools... it's definitely true. i go to school in virginia. none of the houses requires a rec in order to pledge a girl, but it helps more than we let on. i'm northern, so of course i had no clue as a rushee how important they were, and panhel told all the rushees not to worry about getting them, that it is the responsibility of the chapter. but i think that's BS, since i know my chapter doesn't do anything to obtain actual rec forms for the freshmen girls... but if the girls get one sent in to us, we will use it and it is to her advantage.

i realize this doesn't help you much since you know you need recs, but don't know how to get them... but hopefully northern girls rushing in the south will see this and understand that recs are important, no matter what the school says.

Hi, just wanted to say thank you to all who offered advice. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif I am trying to make a list of prospects to talk to, I just am so afraid that I'll look like a blithering idiot when I say, "Hi, I just wanted to let you know that I'm rushing at UA this fall." It would seem like I was expecting a rec or something!!!I mean I'll be more tactful than that, of course, but I will keep you guys posted! Oh, another question. Does anyone know if people who graduated from ANOTHER school, but who was in one of the same sororities that UA's campus had (different chapter) can write recs? I mean, will they count? For example, say that I knew a lady at Auburn U. who offered to write me a rec for her sorority. Would it hold any weight? Thanks so much!

[This message has been edited by orchid2 (edited December 30, 2000).]

Orchid - I am also from Ozark. I pledged a sorority at college this fall, so if you need any help with names of sorority people in Oz just let me know!

YES!!! it doesn't matter at all which college an alumna went to--if she was in a sorority which has a chapter at Alabama, she can write you a rec! this is the cool thing about NPC sororities--they are NATIONAL groups. i'm not sure which sororities are at Alabama, but for instance, if theta is there, then you're looking for any woman who is/was a theta ANYWHERE to supply you with a rec. some sororities will even allow active members (still in college) to write you a rec. in my chapter any rec holds the same weight, whether it is from an in-house alum or from any other chapter.



[This message has been edited by twinstars (edited December 30, 2000).]

[B}twinstars[/B] is right! The alumna can be from ANY NPC chapter anywhere and still write the rec!

As far as actives writing on your behalf - I know in my sorority that is called a letter of reference or a letter of introduction, and can also qualify as a rec for rush purposes. Even better if you know an active - she might just call up the house or talk to the actives she knows in the chapter!

As AlphaChiGirl mentioned, it's better to be over-prepared than under-prepared. I know that everyone will officially tell you that recs don't matter, and that the chapter will get them for you if you need one...

but I'm with twinstars here: at my school and most schools in my region, that is not very accurate! A rushee w/o a rec won't get invited back, and the chapters don't have the time to go out and secure them for the rushee. It isn't that they don't want to -- nothing is a bigger heart-breaker than meeting a special girl who would make a great addition to the house only to find out she doesn't have a rec -- but with hundreds of rushees, photos, piles of paperwork, and about five days to get it all done, there's rarely enough time.

So, as awkward as it might feel, you really have to take control of your own destiny and spend the next few months marketing yourself and making contacts and shmoozing for the recs! I'm sure you will do wonderfully.

Another thing, if somebody is willing to write me one, do THEY have to get the form or do I hand it to them or what...?
I know that some websites have forms for alumni to print out and send in...but I am not entirely sure how this works!

the alum will take care of getting the form... but it is helpful if you can supply her with a list of your high school volunteering/leadership activities. you could also give her your high school gpa and test scores. try to find two nice headshots of yourself that you can give her so she can send those in with your rec. these are all things that 'recommenders' have sent to my chapter about rushees... just offer to supply all this info and she'll tell you what she needs.

Kind of like a formal resume?

I was given a form, on which I had to paste a recent picture (I used my formal senior pictures), and list my name, my parents' name and professions, my school information (high school, college, major, and test scores), my extra-currics and school activities. Also, I had to list any groups I was a legacy of. Not only were these sent to each sorority at my school, they were also given to the women in my area to write my recommendations.
I've heard criticisms of those forms, especially in some large southern schools, where the sororities supposedly use them to weed out minorities (using the picture), and girls who may not be "wealthy" enough to join (using the parents' occupations). If these forms were really being used for these purposes, then it'd have been exposed by now.

orchid2,
I was looking at different NPC websites and noticed that several have "Rush Information Forms" on their websites that you can print off or save. I saved the ones that I could find (I was interested in comparing their differences) and would be happy to email you the files (they're PDF files, so you will need Adobe Acrobat to view them).

If you want them, just say the word and I can send you them via email.

I found and saved the Rush Information forms for:
Alpha Omicron Pi
Alpha Phi
Alpha Xi Delta
Delta Gamma
Delta Zeta
Pi Beta Phi

Just to let you know, several of these "Rush Information Forms" give the alumna member the option to check off "I do not know this individual personally", so even if they don't know you, the form can still serve as a source of information to the collegiate chapter.

Good Luck! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

orchid,

some of the rec forms that my chapter has received have included attached "resume"-type things that the rushees gave their recommenders. it's basically just a list of your high school activities and leadership positions, typed up so it looks nice. this way, when the recommender has to answer questions about your leadership ability or your involvement, even if she doesn't know you well, she'll have something to say. it just makes things easier on the woman writing your recommendation.