Everybodys wants "brothers" now!!
 

Hello Sorors,

I have been on these sites and some of the topics I see are interesting. Why is it that everyone wants what we have with our Sigma brothers? I saw the new Golden Love Affair with the Iotas and the Sigma Gamma Rhos. One member of SGRho even emailed me acusing me of disrespecting her sorority. I have not dissed anyone, but as a SOROR of 10 years, I am tired of the pseudo brother/sister relationships. what do you all think?

I saw the post in question in the Iota forum and I didn't think that the relationship between Sigma Gamma Rho and Iota Phi Theta is in any way official. I think that the organizations have some unofficial and unrecognized bonds across the country, but I don't see it as biting our style, or somehow trying to capitalize on the bond between Zeta Phi Beta and Phi Beta Sigma.

As it was explained to me by a prominent member of Iota Phi Theta(and in the forum), Iota will never have a sister organization, and they're okay with that. The bond that was represented in the post in question was one of mutual respect and admiration.

What's it to us if the ladies of Sigma Gamma Rho wish to express their gratitude/affection/respect for the men of Iota? How does this (or any other non-blue and white pairing) take away from what we share with our Sigma brothers?

Everybody wants brothers now and that's okay with me. Sororities and Fraternities working together is very positive. Any unofficial or official sibling relationships established by other organizations has NO bearing on the bond that Zeta and Sigma share.

What!? http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif
Let me start by saying, I mean no disrespect to other organization. But here is my point of view.
I understand where True Zeta is coming from.

Zeta and Sigmas work hard at the bond we share. The brother/sister thing is something we don't/or shouldn't take lightly. It's not something we claim or decide, it what we are and what we live and share.

So when other organization "claim" each other as brother and sister, it's somewhat offensive to how hard we work as Zeta Phi Beta Sigma. Maybe other soror's can't relate to this experience, but it's so real to me.

To have mutual respect for each other is one thing. But to actually call each other Frat or Soror?
That is hard for me to understand or respect.
Especially when it is not a part of the constitution. Part of being a "Frat or Soror" is dedication. But when the dedication varies from campus to campus...? Why would you use the terms so loosely?

Where I'm from, Zetas and Sigmas pledge online together. Our goals and objectives , not just our colors, are the same nationally and locally.

I have much respect for other frats. We work with them too and we love them too.
But my brothers are the men of Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity, Inc.

We call each other frat and soror no matter what campus you go to.

Please don't be offended, just understand where I am coming from.
It's irrelevant to us as Zeta Phi Beta Sigma,
but I can't respect it as a member of the NPHC.

With the sweetest Zeta love,
DivineZeta


[This message has been edited by DivineZeta (edited July 31, 2001).]

Soror, please email me. z-phi!

Well Sorors,

I don't know when or where you pledged...but I do know that their are some 20+ year Zetas on this board.

I, for one, understand that you want to smirk at people saying they are frat and soror when they aren't constitutionally bound...but the reality is, it's a free country. We haven't written the book on it(bonds) and we are not the only ones to have a bond, ours is just the only NPHC one to be constitutional.
Pledging "old school" teaches you quite abit about respect for other greeks and about Greek Unity(which is still alive and well) and while we might have sibling rivalry and might jest at others about their "bonds,"(I joke my Alpha friend all the time when he mentions the word "Soror"...we both just laugh and move on) it is of no consequence to us. The biZneZZ of Zeta and Sigma does go on. We have many things that set us apart, and the bond is just one of many.
A good friend of mine(a Kappa) once said, "if your organiZation is da bomb, you have no need to put others down in other to make yours tighter." So, I'll leave you with that thought...Peace and God Bless.

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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

[This message has been edited by PrettyKitty (edited July 31, 2001).]

Sorors,

I see both sides of the coin. I don't so much get put out when other groups claim to have brother/sister relationships, as much as when other folks try and NEGATE the relationship Sigmas and Zetas have, which is usually done in the same breath ("I have XYZ love with ABC and we don't need a Constitution because our love is deeper than that and the Sigmas and Zetas don't even get along on my campus anyway so what does that Constitution prove..."). I was also brought in working closely with Phi Beta, and it was a good experience (for the most part http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/wink.gif). I agree that Zeta/Sigma has to go beyond and above the call to ensure that our relationship is effective (any Soror ever been on a local Zeta/Sigma council...ohhhh weee!). However, Sorors short change the amazing history of our Sorority by jumping bad on THAT battle while allowing people to "bite" our principles (Sisterly Love, Finer Womanhood), or our Signature Programs without so much a whimper. To me, that's the greater crime.

We know how hard we work to establish our Bond, and we know we collectively could work much harder on the service level as our Founders envisioned. I also agree that we are all in the running for quality members, but if the only reason a woman wants to join a Sorority is because its relationship with a fraternity, then she is not a quality prospect.

In the end Sorors, our Constitutional Bond with Phi Beta is an important differentiator, but historically it's not the BIGGEST differentiator between Zeta and other organizations. So if other organizations have relationships with others to whom they feel close, so be it. Zeta and Sigma were founded to fulfill similar missions and goals in the community, under the same colors, letters and Constitution. No one will ever be able to understand that, so why hate? Let's clean up our own HOUSE ((clear throat)) Sorors.


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Finer Womanhood: the "Cat's Meow" Since 1920

I have never put anyone down.
But I don't agree with the way they use the term Soror and Frat towards each other.

It totally contridicts what I mean when I used it towards a Sigma or Zeta.

I hope by disagreeing, I'm not seen as being anti - greek unity.
But I just don't agree with using the terms Frat and Soror so loosely.

Divine Zeta


[This message has been edited by DivineZeta (edited July 31, 2001).]

Well I am. I don't like when people call me "Soror" when they don't mean it.
I was never greek, but I am a Zeta.

I loved the Alphas in school. We helped them and they helped us. But when I wouldn't call them "Frat". Nor would I call an SIgma Gamma Rho "Soror" even though I thought they were really cool.
Our bond is not the same.
If I call you soror or frat, I mean it.
When it's used loosely, I'm offended.

DivineZeta



[This message has been edited by DivineZeta (edited July 31, 2001).]

The reality is, sometimes you feel just as much sisterhood or brotherhood to people outside the org...and therefore, out of mutual respect and love you might call them that...but not everyone does it. And I find that as the years go by there is less and less "Greek" Unity felt by anyone in the NPHC towards each other...

I use the term "greek" very loosely...but u know what I meant.

Peace and love...

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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

I was messing with you on the "greek" term http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Although you may have better relationship with others outside of your organization, the word "Soror", in my opinion, is reserved for those within you organization.

And Soror is a word is expected to be true, but is not necessarily the case. In my chapter, we only refered to Zetas as Sorors if you meant it to be true.

With Sisterly Love,
DivineZeta



[This message has been edited by DivineZeta (edited July 31, 2001).]

Say it again Shel! I think u touch on some very important points...so I had to cut and paste to emphasis them.

I have more issue with other Sororities saying they are Finer Women or talking about how they have a Stork's Nest program than someone saying something about a bond.

I love the Sigmas and the bond will alwayZ be there, and my it's a great one...but I am off to fight for the letters I pledged, Z PHI B....

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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

[This message has been edited by PrettyKitty (edited July 31, 2001).]

To each their own Soror...every yard is different...and every locale is different too...I have had Kappas, Ques, Alphas, Deltas, and SGRhos go out of there way to help me...in essence showing me that the true meaning of sisterhood or brotherhood extends beyond the organiZational boundaries and for that I will alwayZ think of them as my Sister Soror or Brother Frater...

There is no mistake though, as to which Sorority I pledged or to which I pledged my heart, my time, and my loyalty to...

SZL,

PK

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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

I have had the same experiences with people in other organizations as well.
I call them my good friends or even best friend. But not Soror. That means Sorority Sister.
Well, we can agree to disagree. No love lost for my Soror http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

DivineZeta


[This message has been edited by DivineZeta (edited July 31, 2001).]

At NPHC conventions everyone is referred to as Frat and Soror. I think its cool and represents our coming together in the name is Sisterhood/Brotherhood and Service. To each his/her own!

I've posted at least a dozen topics in the last few months, none of which got much play. They were fun, light-hearted topics, something to pass the time away, while you all should be working. But this is the one that gets all the attention. I enjoy a good debate, but this is definitely not a topic that everyone will agree on, and can get nasty. Pull up some of my old topics, and lets have some fun.

Respectfully soror, there are many other things that make us different from the other sororities. If we need to hammer in that this bond is the ONLY thing that sets us apart, then perhaps we're not looking deeply enough.

I don't see it as a competition. I see it as each organization has traits, characteristics, and ideals that will fit person A better than person B. It need not degrade into discussions of who's better, or subtly backhanded comments about other organizations.

Calm down Soror. Sometimes we need to vent like this. But I am moving on to your other topics.

Yes, I would Soror have an issue with an AKA that said that...but Finer Womanhood is a Zeta principle not a Sigma one. I pledged Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc. Don't get me wrong, I love the Sigmas...but my first and primary concern is to the organiZation to which I pledged.

We don't have a non-chalant attitude at all...but we do have things to do in our own backyard...or as they say, more important fish to fry...If other people are going to say they are frat and soror, what are you going to do to stop them? Really, what can you do? Why waste time and energy trying to even reply to that non-sense? Laugh at it and move on. It's not that deep


Is our bond with the Sigmas special? Yes
Is our bond unique? Yes(but only w/i the NPHC)
Is our bond the best thing since sliced ham about ZPHIB? No
Is our bond lessened any by others claiming to have Frat and Sorors? No
Would Zeta be any less of an organiZation without our bond? No
Is Zeta an independent organiZation separate from Sigma? Yes


Now, let's move on and continue to talk about more pertinent issues.

Have a Blessed Day!

SZL,
PK

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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

[This message has been edited by PrettyKitty (edited August 01, 2001).]

THIS THREAD IN ENDED SORORS... Z-PHI!!

**hugZ and doveZ** Big Sis...I hope I am as wise as you when I am 20 years into the Sisterhood.

Much Respect Soror!



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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

Since the previous thread was closed, I will respond here.

While I will not stoop to personal attacks, I will say that you (collectively Zetas) seem to be more concerned about your 'bond' than everyone else since the topic keeps finding it's way to the board. Yes, I have bigger fish to fry, but noone has yet to answer the question posed. Oh, well.

Now, back to my crimson and cream life...

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MCCOYRED
Mu Psi '86
BaltCo Alumnae

Dynamic...Salient...Temperate...Since 1913

I was about to respond to your question before the thread was closed. So I will respond here.

Every knows that Zetas and Sigmas are a constitutional binding bond. We all agree that no one else has that.
So we imitate no one.
Others can claim whoever they want. And it can changes from campus to campus from. And it can vary from organization to organization.

With us, it never changes.
It is more than just "claiming" each other. We have significant ideals, principals, goals and programs in common.
So no matter if there were people who "claimed" each other in the past, We are the only constitutionally bounded. That's different from what others had before or have now.
Therefore, those who call each other Frat and Soror, are imitating the real deal.
The Blue and White Family of Zeta Phi Beta Sigma.

Maybe we are more concerned with our bond, because we are the only ones with a bond.

DivineZeta



[This message has been edited by DivineZeta (edited August 13, 2001).]

did i just enter the muthuh fuhin twilight zone or some isht??? what happened to finer womanhood and all that...what happened to being a lovely lady beyond yo pretty face...and what happened to being a delta girl...the finest in the world...uh, huh...i guess that is in face only too...quite frankly i think you ALL are being rather childish...grow the uch up...and be about your business...and quit the petty bullisht...is that clear enough for you...do ya'll understand what i'm saying now...i'm happy flying the friendly skies...maybe ya'll should try it...

peace and many blessings...

[This message has been edited by celestial_blues (edited August 13, 2001).]

Hi mccoyred:

I think it's incorrect to say that Zetas as a collective are concerned with this issue. A few posts by a few Sorors who happen to post in the thread do not constitute a collective agreement among all the members of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc. Just wanted to get that out of the way. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

That being said, I'm going to give my response to ChaosDST's question about who was the first to claim a brother/sister bond:

In the books and articles I've read, no one has officially said when the bond between AKA and Alpha, DST and Omega really began. Perhaps it is because I'm not a member of any of those other illustrious organizations that I'm not privy to the exact date when an edict was passed that AKA and Alpha or Omega and Delta considered themselves brothers and sisters. Yet from Zeta's inception, we were formed as the official sister organiZation to Phi Beta Sigma Fraternity, Inc. and that partnership began on January 16, 1920. It's been documented, it's in our constitutions, and it's an established matter of fact.

Regardless of who was first, the fact remains that we're the only officially bound NPHC organizations. If the Alpha Nation or the members of Delta and Omega want to make their bonds officially and constitutionally recognized, then so be it. If they desire a more informal relationship, well, that's all good too.

Now, I -- Cecily (in the guise of SoTrue1920) -- am not trying to downplay the very real affection that Alphas have for AKAs and Omegas have for Deltas. I know (albeit only from a cursory investigation) about the Alpha Nation and Coleman Love.

It's a dangerous thing to try to speak for anyone who's very capable of speaking for themselves, but I think that the bone of contention that some of my Sorors has raised is over the distinction of official and constitutionally bound brother/sister relationships.

I personally don't have any issues regarding whether the Alpha Nation or Coleman Love are real phenomena. From where I sit, it doesn't take anything away from the bond I share with my Sigma brethren.

My previous post was not to be a personal attack, I stated truth, in my frankness if I offended you, that was not my intent...but I am TRULY TIRED OF THIS TOPIC! As was stated by Cecily, only a few members have an issue with this, I am not one of them. So your ASS U m(e)ption is invalid. If you want to say you have a bond and reference things in the past, I am not going to stop you nor will it bother me in the least bit. I feel that am too old to be concerned with these matters, and I was made in Spr 95.

Peace!


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The Epitome of Beauty, Style, and Grace, Always Exemplifying Good Taste, A Zeta Woman, A Finer Woman, That's Me!

You know what...despite how weird and ridiculous I think your posts usually are...I actually AGREE with you on this one. Point taken...and look who it had to come from.


CHAOS

To be honest this whole discussion is pointless. I'm amazed that it has continued this far so I had to say something. Why are we so concerned about the dealings of other organizations? As someone stated earlier we, sisters of the Dove, have a LOT (I don't think I can stress that enough) more issues to tackle then whether or not other orgs are claiming each other as Frat or Soror. As a nation of Black people we have a history of tearing each other down(crabs in a barrel) and I don't think something like organizational bonds should be added to the ongoing list. Let's support Skee-Phi, Coleman Love, Indiana Love, Golden Love and all the other informal bonds. In the end it says that Black women and men are coming together in the name of service and sisterly and brotherly love to have a positive impact on our communities.Isn't that what we are all about? I love being a member of Zeta Phi Beta Sigma and I know about our bond and that's all that matters! The Dove has spoken. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

The NONGREEK speaks,

As a nongreek who was once researching to see which organization would best fit me I found out many things and many little pitty patty things that I could of done without.

Some might wonder why I as a nongreek would even comment but I feel that what I have to say might open some eyes.

I looked into all 4 NPHC organizations: and many said the only way was XYZ, the road to go is XYZ, and there is no other than XYZ.

But point is all they were doing was telling me bologna-that wasn't providing me with a penny in a nickel.

I dont want to single out anyone cause more than just Zeta did this-but a few of the members made extreme point to stress we are the "ONLY" organization that has a constitution to say we are brothers and sisters. Lovely, but it was very irrevelant being that I wanted to know about the "finer womanhood" because that's what impressed me. I have many Zeta friends and they love there brothers to death and vice versa-but how come I couldn't just get something than that same thing everytime.

Personally, if I was looking for a male affiliate like that wouldn't a so called little sister organization been what I should of looked for.

As for brother and sisterhood. People have the right to claim whoever, whenever they want.

I've heard them all:
Skee Phi Love
Indiana Love
Golden Love
The Phirst Family
Crimson and Creme Connection
Coleman Love
Poodle Que Pounds
And many others even with NPC and LGLO organizations.

My complaint is to focus on what you have not what others are admiring and developing. Isn't that part of the principles being role models and leading the way. Well what way are you trying to lead people-something to think about don't you think. Just remember to take all sides that could be effected before going through such.