How do you know if you're in love?
 

Sappy thread, I know.

How do you know when you're in love?

It's been so long since i've been in a relationship that's gotten to that point, and to top it off I am so analytical and think about everything probably too much.

So, you GCers out there, how did you know when you fell in love with your spouse or bf/gf?

The things that would ordinarily drive you nuts, you think are cute.

And then when you fall out of love they drive you nuts again. :)

Hahaha... that is SO applicable to my BF

if you have to ask, then you aren't in love.

its just one of those things you sort of know.

^ I hate that kind of answer.

I refuse to believe that if and when I meet my future spouse, I'll just "know."

I agree. I'm too logical of a person. I feel it, but my nature is to argue with myself. I do trust my gut instinct about things, but the way I process everything in my life isn't condusive to that sort of thinking (I call it an occupational hazard of my profession, thankfully the bf is the same sort of thinker). Particularly since i'm a little older than last time I was thinking in this sort of light, i'm much more serious about it. Instead of oh wow this guy is fun and I really like him, i'm in love with him! It's more along the lines of is this the person i'm going to spend the rest of my life with.

Honestly, I just knew; there was a point when I thought "hey, I actually love this girl," and that was that. I thought a bit about it, but there was a point where it didn't seem crazy for me to say "I love her" or to tell her that I loved her. It wasn't a specific moment or a specific thing, it just happened.

I'm a thinker too, and generally a overthink things. Honestly, I probably overthought this too.

kddani,

I am so happy that you have found love. Sign that prenup because you don't want some sap takin your cash.


You don't just "know" you are in love. The feeling that greeklettergirl is talking about is called lust.

you know you are in love when you talk about the other person alot, you just smile when you think about them, or you get an erection when you see them naked.

Hell, it's been about three years since I've been in love.

Of course, I can't say the same for having my breath taken away. That happened this semester, not that it matters all that much.

This is spot-on. You just know and don't have to ask -- at least that's how I've experienced it. Like they say in Taoism, "the name that can be named is not the eternal name." It just is. It doesn't matter what you do for a living or how old or serious you are. Those things speak to different issues -- they don't tell you whether you are IN love, but they tell you how you will react to love when you have it, or what you will accept as "love" if you don't.

who are you and what have you done with my favorite lesbian Valkyrie

Lesbian? I thought I was known far and wide for digging black men?

Wtf. You aren't a lesbian?


And why have you not posted in my Rocky IV thread yet? I will bust you fool!

I've never seen a Rocky movie. Isn't bustin' a foo' a Mr. T thing?

We want prenup!

When a boy sends you a note, and it says "Do you love me? Check yes or no" and then it has the two little boxes with "yes" and "no" written next to them, and you check the "yes" box.

that is the most correct answer

This thread is too dayum sappy, but this is how I look at love too. You just know.

Hmmm, I don't really look at love quite the same way. I guess I measure it more by my reactions to the person/relationship, rather than an inherent knowledge/feeling. When I'm in love with someone then I'm constantly concerned for their well-being (I pray for them and worry for their safety, etc). I never want to be someplace other than with them. I am saddened by the thought of not being with them. I can't imagine that I'd be happier in a relationship with someone else, and the appeal of dating another man fades to zippo. Being with them feels natural. They are my best friend (next to God and mommy). I have a feeling of respect and admiration for them. I just feel like we match one another. I guess for me, after I realize all of these things, then it occurs to me that I love the person; then I feel like I could marry that person and not want to shot myself in the foot in 6 mos.

I pointed at gun at my girlfriends head and asked her if she loved me. She said yes, but for some reason she sounded a little nervous.

Meh

Tell her to listen to M.O.P. Ante Up. She'll get some backbone in her and won't be afraid anymore.

Ok sweet. Let me inflate her back up and we'll listen to that song.

dammit LOL

Everyone's got a different idea of what being 'in love' is. You have to figure out how YOU define it before you can know if you're in it or not.

Thanks, Platitude Police!

LMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAO

Dammit I hate GC sometimes!

Just because I had to look up what platitude meant before I responded, it doesn't mean I'm any less insulted!!!!!!!!!!

A++ post of the day.

I also thnk it can depend on the person you are in love with. I was in love with my college boyfriend and I'd describe it as the always smiling when you think of him, caring for his well-being, making me happy kind of love. But he was really laid back and a totally different personality than my husband.

As I've gotten older and lived with and am now married to my husband, a lot more issues come up that are more serious than college and it's not the same for me. Sometimes he drives me nuts and definitely doesn't make me smile! :p But I always feel I would be happier arguing with him then never being with him at all. I always tell him he knows I must love him because I wouldn't put up with him if I didn't!

Plus, here's a good one my girlfriends and I laugh about - you know you're in love when you can pass gas in front of them!!! :o :D

Okay in all seriousness, I want to ask about this. Do most people do this? Or even use the, um, bathroom facilities in front of each other?

I think thats more of a sign of being comfortable and sloppy than love.

But that holds true with your very closest friends, as well. What's the difference between 'in love' and an awesome friendship? Is sexual attraction the only tipping point?

In my opinion, yes, as far as love goes.

Whether you choose to make the person you are in love with your lifetime partner through marriage takes some cognitive analysis too though. (about life goals, role expectations, desire to have children or not, etc)

We are, but I was asking a side-question.

Not the only tipping point.

A girlfriend should be my friend. And a girl.

And there should be mutual physchial attration.

And physichal compatibility, like where your bodies fit together.

Plus, I have to be able to put my arm around at church/the movies.

Maybe for you, but not for me. Really.

And yes, valkyrie, I pee in front of him when needed but I don't do the other...though in an emergency once I did while he was in the shower...:o TMI, sorry...

I hate to say it, but you just know. Or at least I just did, and I'm sure I'm not the only one out there.

It's just a feeling I had and when I looked back on previous relationships where I thought I was "in love" I knew that the feeling I had was much different and I just knew.

It really is sappy, but it's something that I find difficult to explain.

Married but not in love...
 

It's sad...not to know love, that is. I was once in love! How do I know? Well...no other woman would interest me or get my attention in any way (no matter what she looked like or what she had on - or not); I would smile with every sensation of her existence; The truth of things would come out naturally - lies did not exist; Life felt easy and pleasant - it was easy to learn anything, deal with any situation no matter how unpleasant...I felt like Superman although I couldn't fly or dodge a bullet! Need I mention that it was only then that I was the best man I ever wanted to be...my dreams seemed possible, my possibilities endless! What a woman!!! I could trust myself in her hands, I could close my eyes and let her take the wheel and guide me through any uncertainty. I had not one sad moment - I know...it sounds impossible yet it was true - I miss being in love and I hope that those who deserve it find it...Agapa alh8ina kai mhv pwnas...dwse tov eauto sou kai deksou ths agaph sou th psyxh -