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-   -   Another PNAM (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=77855)

bichonl 05-02-2006 05:25 PM

Another PNAM
 
I am going to take inspiration from Sister Havana and call my potential new home "Bichon". (I like bichon frises.)

Here's my story:

Over the summer, I decided I would like to become a member of an NPC. Being out of college for five years, I was obviously going to work harder at this process. I researched each NPC in Baird's. From Baird's, I narrowed down my choices to ten sororities.

I contacted Bichon. The officer said it was the summer and other officers were on vacation. She suggested we wait until autumn.

I went on with life. Last month, I contacted the same national officer of Bichon. I wrote a lengthy introduction about myself and why I want to become an initiated member of Bichon. Rapport was built and I was sent the first form for alum initiation.

After filling it out and sending it to the particular national officer, the national officer contacted me about finding a sponsor, which would be an initiated Bichon in good standing.

A friend of my from a local organization is an initiated Bichon and agreed to sponsor me. Bichon HQs sent me the next form, which is the application plus the recommendation from my sponsor.

The Bichon officer said my sponsor and I will send the form to her and "we will take it from there".

to be continued.... :)

Tom Earp 05-02-2006 05:42 PM

Only way to find out is try!:cool: :D

Let us Greeks know!


The Best of Luck!:)

Scandia 05-02-2006 08:49 PM

Wow, that sounds good.

I do not know how much work would the officers of the sororities I like would be doing during the summer. But I did not find out about AI till last month. And I will be going on vacation soon. So I cannot really begin the contact process till mid to late May.

I have no deadline for this.

And I named my sororities after stars. I listed them in alphabetical order of the stars- not of the sororities they correspond to.

Jimmy Choo 05-02-2006 11:27 PM

Good luck with everything!!!!!!!! I named my groups after shoes. If you need anyone to talk to feel free to pm

MJo19 05-03-2006 06:51 AM

Best of luck to you!! :D

bichonl 05-03-2006 12:58 PM

UPDATE:
I came to the part in the application where I have to specify the chapter at which to be initiated. I picked my alma mater, which has a chapter of Bichon. I emailed the officer to clarify my choice.

The national officer said she will work to get me initiated at my first choice. She said I should specify that I will affiliate with the closest alum chapter, but can change to another one if I find a better fit.

I emailed her back asking if I could get initiated at convention this summer. She said that they already have their initiates for convention, but that it was a "good question". She said we can work with the collegiate chapter for their fall initiation.

I'm bummed that I can't get initiated this summer.
But, it's a blessing in disguise because I do have to take 3 classes at a local college for my paralegal certification. And, it would be a stretch to afford college tuition AND transportation, convention, initiation, and badge fee. So, it's all good in the end.

I'm feeling really good about this. :)

SmartBlondeGPhB 05-03-2006 02:13 PM

You're completing paperwork and discussing when you can be initated and you haven't even met anyone in the local alumnae group?????? That's bizarre......

jhujenn 05-03-2006 02:46 PM

It's not strange depending upon the organization. I know of a couple of organizations where the local alum group isn't involved if the woman has a sponsor.

AlphaFrog 05-03-2006 02:48 PM

I believe we have an ASA AI on GC who started an Alum chapter because there wasn't a local one. I guess it's not that strange.

KSUViolet06 05-03-2006 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jhujenn
It's not strange depending upon the organization. I know of a couple of organizations where the local alum group isn't involved if the woman has a sponsor.
I *think* it's the same with my sorority. You can bypass meeting with an alumnae chapter if a member in good standing recommends

SmartBlondeGPhB 05-03-2006 03:31 PM

"Bizarre" was actually me being polite........

You are accepting a woman who has never met the local alumnae so she has no idea if she will get along with any of them and will want to be involved with them. If it's an area with only one chapter then she's not likely to get very involved if she doesn't have anything in common with the other women in the group and isn't comfortable with them. And what's the point of initiating someone as an AI who isn't going to be involved? We already have PLENTY of those who joined in college.

Plus, you are inviting a woman to join based on the opinion of one person and how she looks on paper (the application). You certainly can't judge someone's commitment level based on that. If someone looked at my volunteer commitments they might conclude that I do a lot of things at once (which I do) and they might think that my commitment to each one is low (which would be very wrong) and that I don't have time for something else.

jhujenn 05-03-2006 03:36 PM

For sake of discussion...

What if the woman interested in AI is looking at the org to be involved in an advisor capacity at a local collegiate chapter? Why would it matter if they get along with the local alum group?

SmartBlondeGPhB 05-03-2006 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jhujenn
For sake of discussion...

What if the woman interested in AI is looking at the org to be involved in an advisor capacity at a local collegiate chapter? Why would it matter if they get along with the local alum group?

Because they are going to need that local alumnae chapter if they ever need additional help (or monetary donations). If the alumnae chapter members don't like the chapter advisor they are quite unlikely to want to show up at any collegiate function to support them. Plus, it's a bit hypocritical for an advisor to advocate to the collegians that they should get involved with their local alumnae chapter when she doesn't. And I can only speak for my own group but we put heavy emphasis on what a local alumnae chapter can do for alumnae and that the graduating seniors should get involved with the local group when they settle in after graduation.

33girl 05-03-2006 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AlphaFrog
I believe we have an ASA AI on GC who started an Alum chapter because there wasn't a local one. I guess it's not that strange.
Well, there was a semi local one, but not local enough - as in "it's too snowy to go" local. :)

The alum chapter does not have the same weight in all orgs where AI is concerned.

Scandia 05-03-2006 10:04 PM

Unlike the OP, I do not know anyone in the sororities I am interested in. I had several acquaintances in them in undergrad, but nobody that I interact with on a regular basis or lives near me is an alumna or potential sponsor.

Hence I will have to contact the alumnae chapter after the national headquarters refer me to it. Lucky for me, there seem to be alumnae chapters for all in or near this county.

AGDee 05-03-2006 10:27 PM

She did say she has a friend who is an initiated member, so it's not as though she doesn't know/hasn't met anybody. I'd be willing to bet that if a well respected and involved alumna presented a close friend (or relative) for AI, that it could go through without as much red tape.

We often have AIs who are serving in an advisor capacity in remote areas where there are no local alumnae chapters. Most of our advisors for our two chapters in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan are AIs. Generally, they are faculty at the university and agree to be advisors and then they are offered AI.

kddani 05-03-2006 10:57 PM

Shouldn't more than one member (that one person being the "sponsor") meet the PNAM before any definite discussions are made?

honeychile 05-03-2006 11:03 PM

Since I don't know which GLO she's referring to, I wouldn't know - everyone seems to do it differently.

I highly approve of your screen name, though, bichonl. Being a Bichon Mom myself, I wish you the best!
http://www.orangepopdesign.com/peppe...c-1/bf_new.gif

bichonl 05-04-2006 08:25 AM

In my defense
 
I actually have an awesome resume.

Basically, I have worked with non-profit, fraternal type organizations for the past ten years.

In my junior year of college, I was a mentor to a fourth grade girl with learning disabilities. The next semester, I was a mentor to an elderly Hispanic woman who was facing many challenges. My major was early childhood education and my minor speech-language pathology. Again, not only was I studying pedagogy WITH SLP disorders, I was also learning how to build rapport with a variety of people. And yes, I earned academic honors along the way.

I have a master's in curriculum and instruction, so that shows my dedication to working with children and their families.

In graduate school, I was program director of my denomination's campus ministry for one and a half years. I had to resign once I started working full-time.

These accomplishments have all been mentioned on my honor initiation candidate form. Yes, I had to write an essay explaining why I wanted to become a member of Bichon. My sponsor will have to write an essay stating why she recommends me for initiation. My sponsor and I have been attending the same church for three years and have both been involved in various ministries.

In terms of working with the local alum group, I see no reason why I won't get along with the women. I'm pleasant, smart, and open-minded. I am very interested in helping the local community and the local collegiate chapter through various volunteer opportunities. Let's face it, we're not going to LOVE everyone in our fraternities on a personal level. But, we can love them all UNCONDITIONALLY.

I'm glad Bichon is giving me the opportunity to present myself in a professional manner. I'm also glad I'm getting the opportunity to have some say in which alum chapter I affiliate with and where I get initiated.

dakareng 05-04-2006 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by kddani
Shouldn't more than one member (that one person being the "sponsor") meet the PNAM before any definite discussions are made?
Depends on that group's policies. The process that she describes is more familiar to me than many I've read in this forum. Potential AIs in Pi Phi are 'presented' on paper by their sponsor to the club. They may or may not already have a collegiate chapter sponsor at that point. They do not come to any events or meetings. Yes, most, if not all, of them are known to other members and often are mothers or sisters of members. Personally, I find it "bizarre" to have someone come to an event as a potential AI when there is a chance that she won't be accepted. It's one thing to go through collegiate recruitment that way, but we aren't 'recruiting' AIs. If one of my club members says this woman would be a good volunteer, I take her word for it.

Scandia 05-04-2006 06:49 PM

Bichon- wow, sounds like you done a lot.

During undergrad, I was in Alpha Phi Omega service fraternity, mentored two children during my senior year of college, was webmaster of my major's club for 2 years, belonged to the church's youth group, and was in Golden Key and Alpha Lambda Delta Honor Societies.

In graduate school I was the archivist for the Student Organizations for my major. Plus I substitute-taught both years, as well as worked as a part-time librarian the second year.

Now I have worked with immigrants and inner city communities for outreach, among others. Out of work I have taken a foreign language class. I have almost finished my first year as a full time librarian. And I go to the gym often. So I have kept busy.

Hopefully this will make a good impression to the sororities of my choice. While at the same time, I hope to not sound like I am bragging. I want to market myself, not impose myself.

LPIDelta 05-04-2006 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SmartBlondeGPhB
You are accepting a woman who has never met the local alumnae so she has no idea if she will get along with any of them and will want to be involved with them. If it's an area with only one chapter then she's not likely to get very involved if she doesn't have anything in common with the other women in the group and isn't comfortable with them. And what's the point of initiating someone as an AI who isn't going to be involved? We already have PLENTY of those who joined in college.

Plus, you are inviting a woman to join based on the opinion of one person and how she looks on paper (the application). You certainly can't judge someone's commitment level based on that.

I find nothing strange about how Bichonl is going about AI--in fact, I find it a little refreshing. It drives me a little batty that everyone seems to think that its ok that AI take years. Potential AIs, if you take anything from this board, understand that EVERY GROUP IS DIFFERENT. When collegians come through recruitment, we may have met them over three days! And as far as determining someone's commitment level from an application and resume--that's what employers do when they are hiring for a position.

There is also nothing that guarantees that traditional alumnae will like the people in their local alumnae chapter either or that they will be involved at all. In most cases, I have much more faith that an AI will want to contribute than I do that a traditional alumna will do the same.

There are many more ways to be involved as an alumna than just through an alumna chapter. I know my experience seems to be an exception, but I have never been in an alumnae chapter officially, and yet I have been VERY involved with the international organization and local chapters as an advisor, director and international leader.

My group only requires the nomination of one sister--and I am ok with that, because I trust that my sisters will only want to initiate women of strong character, willing to commit to our values.

Good luck Bichonl! Based on your resume, I would love to have someone like you in my org. Sorry to hijack...we can now return to our regularly scheduled postings.

33girl 05-04-2006 09:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Heather17
I find nothing strange about how Bichonl is going about AI--in fact, I find it a little refreshing. It drives me a little batty that everyone seems to think that its ok that AI take years. Potential AIs, if you take anything from this board, understand that EVERY GROUP IS DIFFERENT. When collegians come through recruitment, we may have met them over three days! And as far as determining someone's commitment level from an application and resume--that's what employers do when they are hiring for a position.
I don't think anyone thinks it's "OK" - more that they want PNAMs to know that just because Annie AI completed her process in 3 months, that's not necessarily what will happen to them.

Yes we give bids to collegians we've only spent a few hours with, but we can also terminate collegians if down the line, it's shown that they are not living up to the commitment they made to the group. It's quite a bit harder to terminate an alumna.

Oh, and employers also do face to face interviews, often more than one. There are very few people who get hired solely from their resume.

It sounds like bichonl is in a different position than many of the GC PNAMs we've seen - because she already knows someone in the group. When you know someone in the group before AI even came up and are not approaching them out of the blue, naturally it's going to flow more smoothly. As far as her participating or not with the alum chapter, it's not a necessity. We have women who are national volunteers but don't participate in alum chapters, either because there isn't one by them, they didn't get along with the other women in it, or they don't have the time to do both. It all depends upon the structure of your organization.

bichonl 05-16-2006 08:34 AM

LIFE HAPPENS: I missed meeting up with my sponsor because she had two emergency business trips. Last week, I mailed the form to her house because we both have no way of seeing each other due to hectic schedules.

She let me know she received it, but had to go out of town again. She will fill it out this week.

I'm surprisingly calm about this. I know life happens. I know we all have crazy schedules. Besides, I will have to wait until the fall to get initiated with a collegiate chapter. I won't have a pledge period or any other pinning ceremonies, so really the only thing I'm waiting for is the official invitation from the national officer in charge of alum initiation. I am going to call her Mrs. Frise from now on, to go along with the "bichon" theme!

On an unrelated note, I decided not to become a paralegal. I'm going to remain a teacher.

kddani 05-16-2006 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bichonl
LIFE HAPPENS: I missed meeting up with my sponsor because she had two emergency business trips. Last week, I mailed the form to her house because we both have no way of seeing each other due to hectic schedules.

She let me know she received it, but had to go out of town again. She will fill it out this week.

I'm surprisingly calm about this. I know life happens. I know we all have crazy schedules. Besides, I will have to wait until the fall to get initiated with a collegiate chapter. I won't have a pledge period or any other pinning ceremonies, so really the only thing I'm waiting for is the official invitation from the national officer in charge of alum initiation. I am going to call her Mrs. Frise from now on, to go along with the "bichon" theme!

On an unrelated note, I decided not to become a paralegal. I'm going to remain a teacher.

Glad to hear that you're making progress, but I have to ask...

If you're too busy to meet up with your sponsor, how are you going to have enough time to be an AI and participate in activities?

I would also caution you not to say that you'll be initiated in the fall, etc. until you get a definite invitation and definite information from your potential organization.

bichonl 05-16-2006 06:17 PM

::sigh:: I have requested that this post be taken down. I am just uncomfortable with this whole post. I will also be cancelling my account. I am still going through with my alum initiation process, but I will not be writing about it anymore. Thank you to everyone who responded to my post or sent PMs.

Drolefille 05-16-2006 07:40 PM

I wish you luck in your AI journey.

And I hope you come back after everything's done.

To KDDani: Don't most adult women have hectic lives? It sounds like the sponsor's life is equally hectic yet she manages to actively participate.

kddani 05-16-2006 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Drolefille
I wish you luck in your AI journey.

And I hope you come back after everything's done.

To KDDani: Don't most adult women have hectic lives? It sounds like the sponsor's life is equally hectic yet she manages to actively participate.

Of course most adult women have hectic lives. But we as members of NPC orgs do have a right to ask the simple question of how much time our PNAI may have for the org, just as we would for undergrad PNMs who go through rush. It's a valid question.

Scandia 05-16-2006 07:50 PM

Bichon- I'm sorry to hear that you will be departing. Good luck with AI. I just took a couple more small steps myself, and am awaiting to hear more information.

MJo19 05-16-2006 08:21 PM

I am sorry to hear that you are leaving. I hope things work out for you!

Drolefille 05-16-2006 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by kddani
Of course most adult women have hectic lives. But we as members of NPC orgs do have a right to ask the simple question of how much time our PNAI may have for the org, just as we would for undergrad PNMs who go through rush. It's a valid question.
Yes, and if you were her sponsor or a member of the chapter that was rushing her, that would make sense. But otherwise it kind of comes across as harassing.

I just don't want GC to give her a negative experience of sorority women, alumna or collegiate.

kddani 05-16-2006 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Drolefille
Yes, and if you were her sponsor or a member of the chapter that was rushing her, that would make sense. But otherwise it kind of comes across as harassing.

I just don't want GC to give her a negative experience of sorority women, alumna or collegiate.

Asking someone if they have time for our organizations is harassing? By what definition?

We don't know what organization she is pursuing. It could be mine. I care about who joins my GLO. This is why a lot of people dislike this AI subforum... there's so much sunshine blowing. When someone asks a real question of a PNAI, they get chastised. A few other people have also discussed this particular thread and had similar thoughts as me, I just happened to be the first to post it.

I'm sure that someone as accomplished as the OP would know better than to have a negative view of sororities based on someone asking her a question on a message board.

SmartBlondeGPhB 05-17-2006 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Drolefille
Yes, and if you were her sponsor or a member of the chapter that was rushing her, that would make sense. But otherwise it kind of comes across as harassing.

I just don't want GC to give her a negative experience of sorority women, alumna or collegiate.

And if I was her sponsor, I WOULD be asking the question.........

MTSUGURL 05-17-2006 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bichonl
LIFE HAPPENS: I missed meeting up with my sponsor because she had two emergency business trips. Last week, I mailed the form to her house because we both have no way of seeing each other due to hectic schedules.
She didn't say that she was too busy to meet with her sponsor. She said that her sponsor had emergency business trips.

Tom Earp 05-17-2006 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MTSUGURL
She didn't say that she was too busy to meet with her sponsor. She said that her sponsor had emergency business trips.

Oh, glad I wasnt the only one who saw that.:)

Steady down everyone!

Maybe she is enthusiactic for a reason and is joyful!

Be nice or dont post.:rolleyes:

Have a nice day, everyone!:D

kddani 05-17-2006 04:36 PM

I still read her post to say that she was also very busy and that was part of the reason why they couldn't meet up, but hey, everyone interprets things differently.

She requested that the thread be closed/taken down, Tom, so are you going to respect her wishes?

Tom Earp 05-18-2006 08:52 AM

Well, since You so deem it, I will make it so.


But, I am doing it as some seem so adament about how a person should try PNAIing.

It is their business how they are doing it and how they feel while doing AI.


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