Does Houston and Texas really suck that bad?
 

I was born in Houston and lived in Sugar Land for a few years. My mom says it is a shitty city, and she never wants me to move back there. LOL. I was in Houston recently and it was cold as fuck. I was getting out of a car when I saw a homeless guy chillin in a parking lot with two small chunks of broken concrete in his hand. He was walking around chillin his little broken chunks as I walked away. Suddenly he did his best Roger Clemens impersonation and threw two 2 seem fastballs at a green camry solara. BAM BAM! Holey shit! That is scary thing to witness in Houston!!! But I'll give Houston, and entire state of Texas the benefit of the doubt for that matter. But, after reading the beginning part of this guys article, I'm beginning to wonder. Is it really that crappy!?!?!


This guy Bill Simmons hates Houston


By Bill Simmons
Page 2

HOUSTON -- On the night before I hopped a plane to Texas for the NBA's annual All-Star Weekend, L.A. Times columnist J.A. Adande e-mailed me just to say, "Have fun at the black Super Bowl."

And that's when I thought two things:

1) Perfect. That's the perfect description of why I love NBA All-Star Weekend. It's the black Super Bowl. How could you possibly predict what could happen at the black Super Bowl?

2) Damn, why didn't I think of that phrase first?

Without further ado, some awards for the 2006 Black Super Bowl, which delivered the goods (as always):

All the stars come out for the Black Super Bowl -- even if it's in Houston. (John Sciulli/WireImage.com)

The Phil Connors Award for "City that I can't seem to escape"
In the past four years, I made four separate trips to Houston and spent a total of 24 days here. And you know why I did it? For you, the reader. I covered the Galleryfurniture.com Bowl, the Super Bowl, baseball's All-Star Game, and now, the NBA All-Star Game. And you know what? That's too much freaking time to spend in Houston. My editors just bleeped me, I don't care. Maybe Houston doesn't suck any more or less than 20 other major cities, and maybe the people are friendly and likable, but the fact remains, you would never come here for any reason, other than these three:

(1) For work.
(2) To gain weight.
(3) To get shot.

You just wouldn't. And yet, dating back to the Super Bowl XXXVIII in February 2004, three of the last eight major sporting events were held in Houston. Does this make any sense? There are 30 to 35 American cities that could host the Super Bowl and/or either of the All-Star Games ... and yet Houston pulled off the Ultimate Pro Sports Trifecta in a 24-month span, despite the fact that it's a sprawling city with traffic and safety problems (the three intangibles you always want to avoid for major sporting events). Here's what really frightens me: I have spent so much time here, I actually know my way around. Can I have this information removed from my brain? Is there a pill I can take?

Anyway, I have the following announcement to make: I am never, ever, ever setting foot in Houston again. I don't care if the Red Sox play the Astros in the World Series. I don't care if the Celtics play the Rockets in the NBA Finals. I don't care if my daughter gets engaged to an astronaut and has to have a quickie wedding in Houston hours before he gets launched to Saturn. I'm never coming back to Houston. Twenty-four days were enough. No offense.

With all the Texas residents, this thread is going to bring on a storm...

First of all, a lot of what Bill Simmons says is for comedic purposes; half of what's in the column probably isn't that serious. His point seems to be that Houston has gotten a whole lot of big sporting events lately, and it seems a bit odd to him. He likes to have fun with his columns, and he doesn't shy away from getting people upset, whether he's talking about a certain city, a sports team, or an athlete in particular. (i.e. columns about the Yankees, Roger Clemens, or many other topics).

If he is serious; well, hey, he has his right to dislike Houston, just like anyone has a right to dislike any other city. I've never been to Houston - I've heard great things, and I've heard bad things. I know people who live there and love it, and I know people who lived there briefly but didn't like it so much.

That said, though, I think this could turn into a "My city is perfect and no one has a right to criticize it" threads.

Houston is really not a great city. Stick to the Kinkaide area, very fratty and wealty neighborhoods and surroundings.

Forget Houston and all those Cali-hating Texans. I remember asking this lady when I was in Austin about why there's stickers that say "Keep Austin Wierd." She said all the Californians were messing it up.

GTFOH.....It's California Love, I Got a Grip and I Say Hella.....Austin was tight, but Texas just wasn't for me.

Maybe if "y'all" turn down the heat from Hell to hot maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

Uhhhh, Death Valley "CALI" is the hottest place in America

Record High of 134 in Death Valley
World Record High 136 was recorded in Libya

Ok, now we're just splitting hairs.....

C'Mon, LA, San Diego, even wack ass Norcal doesn't get as hot and HUMID as Austin and Houston....

ETA: Although I love Cali, I'll give Texas this:

At least you weren't stupid enough to elect The Terminator as your Governor...

George. 134 dry heat feels like 70 degree texas humidity.

Dude. we have the freakin Terminator. How awesome is that. Texas has George W. Bush. I'd rather have Arnold

no shit sherlock. That was my whole intention of starting this thread

TX does suck
 

I can't wait to leave.

Haha, well ok then.

I've been to Houston once. I liked it a lot...more than I thought I would. :)

I moved to Houston this summer, have visited Dallas and Austin a few times. Texans are very friendly and helpful people, and are also very proud of their state.

I don't think Texas will be my permanent home, but the locals have been very welcoming.

I visited Houston once, when I was a kid, so I really don't remember too much. I have heard people say that their zoning laws (or lack thereof) make for some interesting urban landscape.

Translation.


Texas is where my job is right now so I have to be nice, but there aint no way in hell I am staying here forever

Translation.

I thought I would hate Houston. Instead, I just dislike it

I was born here and I'll die here.

keep austin weird is a campaign to promote local businesses rather than corporations. and most people think cali and austin are very similar.. so that's kinda weird.

Houston isnt my favorite city in Texas. My family lives there; Sugar Land actually.

A critical view tho of Texas.

The infrastructure sucks here. Because of our low national profile (were not on either one of the coasts and havent been a historical population center or site of strategic importance to the US Gov - the funding source). Also, our taxes are rediculiously low, so we cant really afford to find things the way they should; higher ed, freeways, etc.) But thats how most texans like it. There is actually a ban on state income taxes in our state consitiution.

It gets hot as hell here in the summer. Conversely, it is reallyt mild here in the winter. Yeah, it was cold last weekend, but the highs were in the 40's while he was here. Did he run a column on the three feet of snow NYC got two weeks ago? Callign texas cold is just foolish. THis winter has been really mild as well. Christmas day it was 75 and we spent the afternoon out by the pool. We have onyl hit freezing here twice this winter. I guarantee we'll hit 90 in the next two weeks. We almost hit it here a few weeks ago. I am fine with the heat. As I have said a million times before, no one ever dropped dead of a heart attack shoveling the heat outta the driveway. Plus, texas isnt like up north. Everyone here has AC. Pretty much all buildings, so unless you are a day laborer or lawn care guy, you are only in it walking to and from your car.

Most cities in Texas suffer from sprawl. This is because texans dont like governemnt involvment in their lives and most cities have lax zoning ordinances. Here of late, they have strengthened them but its kinda the genie in the bottle thing. Too little too late. So with that comes the attendant problems of traffic and congestion. It dosent help that we are the second or third fastest growing state in the US. Everyone is moving here becuase the job market is pretty good and we have the lowest hosuing costs in the nation here. There is no 'bubble' in texas. You can get a brand new 3,000 sq ft house in a brand new subdivision (yeah its a mcmansion but still) with mid level finishes for about $140K. Of course if you work downtown, your commute is gonna be a half hour...

Each city in texas is different. Houston is new money, and an immigrant center. (Its a port city). Lots of business there. But there is lots of refinerys and manufacturing. It dosent seem to have much of a personality to me. I didnt grow up there and my family has only lived there for 9 years. Yes, in independence day there was a small part of me that cheered when the millitary nuked houston, lol.

Dallas is money. Its the LA of texas. Its the only place where you have to dress up to mow the yard. (OK, dress up to watch your yard guy mow the yard). It is pretty fast paced and has lots going on there. Again, sprawl is there too. I have a sister that lives there and its cool, but it snows up in that part of the state and thats a deal breaker for me. Plus they have tornados up there and I dont go for that,

San Antonio is a cool place. 1.5 million people and still has a small town feel. This is the perfect place to raise kids because its a relatively safe place and the schools are great. Its also a big hit with the millitary retirees because there are lots of services here with 4 bases. It does suck being young here because there isnt a huge nightlife scene (like austin has). If you want fun, you have to suck it up and go do the tourist thing on the riverwalk. The city is in the midsts of an economic rebirth tho. In the last year new companies to the area have brought 25K+ new jobs and Toyota just added its first manufacturing plant in Texas here last year.

Austin is pretty cool and one of my favorite places in texas. Just has a cool vibe to it, and pretty urban. Its a pretty cultured place too, with the academia and the university there.

Lots of the big cities look just like any of the other big cities anywhere in the south or west. Big box stores and mc mansions for miles. Where my family lives, there is nothing around that has been there more than 5 years. I kinda miss character of older areas. My neighborhood is about 40 years old and I like it that way.

I dont know if you can qualify why some of us are so passionate about texas. Its about being tied to the land and your people being from here. Its a nod to the history and what made this land ours. Would I ever leave texas, sure, if it was for a job or something, but I'd always want to and plan to return. It is just a part of who I am. This place is in my blood. Is it perfect here, hell no. Do I have a list of things I'd liek to fix? Yes.

I also dont think someone could live here for a year or two and 'get it'. You have to have spent a long time here to get it or in some cases, like it. I think thats true for a lot of places tho. A year or so isnt long enough to fall in love with a place and consider it your home. But thats just my opinion.

Thats the worst comparison ever. We HAD George W. (he's not the governor anymore, btw). And he was actually a great governor. I cant stand him now but loved him as a governor. He had HUGE approval ratings while in office. Plus, Bush isnt 'from' Texas. As Jon Stewart said, "He was born in that quaint small texas town called CONNECTICUT.

Also, cali had both Reagan AND Nixon. As governerors and presidents. SO you all had good and bad. All of us do. But Kinky Freeman is the shit. He could win the governorship in Nov. I think hes cooler than Arnold. Def. funnier.

Houston is like any other big city. It's good, it's bad, overall it's OK.

I love living in Denver, but that doesn't make it perfect. Noplace is.

I'm a born and bred Texan. I love this state with all my heart.....

That said- HOUSTON SUCKS!!!! There is only one reason that I look forward to going there these days, and he will hopefully be back in the ATX in a few years. ;)

As for governors- true we don't have W anymore.... And I would take the Governator any day over the jack-ass we DO have right now. :p

And eh, I don't think it's too hot here. Yeah it gets pretty steamy in the summer time, but I would rather have that than blizzards. And I enjoyed being able to wear shorts on Christmas Day. :D

isnt he a fellow aggie of yours?

Yes he is, but I don't claim him. ;)

Though, I will claim Will Wynn, the mayor of Austin. He is an Aggie. I have even seen him at some of our Aggie happy hours- hanging out at the dive bar drinking a beer with everyone. I think that's pretty cool.

I live in Houston now and I like it.

Lindz,

Were you at the last aggie happy hour at Don's depot? I was there, hadn't been in years but hopefully will start going more often from now on.

I have been to Houston about 4 times and I find it to be a very disgusting city, IMO, the cesspool of Texas.

I grew up in San Antonio and could not wait to leave. You could not go to a park without worrying about being kidnapped or shot. I know things have changed some but watching the evening news there reminds me why I left-too much crime. Austin is much safer and much prettier :).

Sweet Jesus are you serious. I am from Austin, Home is stll Austin. Austin is nothing like California. I think that comment made me throw up in my mouth a little.

And to whomever said Kinky FRIEDMAN, foe Gov........hell yes. "My Governor is a Jewish Cowboy."

Y'all's funny as hayle...
 

I lived in Dallas for a year... I got very sick and my boss relocated and I had to leave...

I knew that once I moved outta of SoCal it would be a oneway ticket. I'd never be able to afford to come back and live. A portapotty is a million dollars in SoCal--Tijuana, B.C. to be exact...

And the other thing is it was getting crazy in SoCal--like "Didn't even havta use my A.K.--gotta say it was good day..."

But Dallas made me gain too much weight!!! And everybody is married there. The heat and humidity didn't shock me because I was use to the good ole southern mason dixon line heat--too many family members in from actually Houston to Montgomery to Tallahasee to ATL to Daytona Beach...

I did like Houston... I did go to the summer Concert in the Park to raise money for young people... It was like a Kareoke [sp?]--dude got up and was singing, "turn out the lights" and forgot the rest of the song and kept shouting "turn em off!" And my husband and I just busted up laughing...

But I'm sorry, Texas has waaay too many mega churches for me... That is a strange concept to me. But hey, whatever floats one's boat... I find them too cultish if you ask me. But I do like Joel Osteem--he's pretty good. And I attended Friendship West Baptist in Dallas when I lived there...

The Pac Northwest ain't got nowhere near the kinna church that you get in Texas...

But I would be a nasty Californian and Kalifornicate half of Texas with land grabbing. Only thing though is folks carry and shoot concealed weapons and hit their targets in Texas. The Californians wave guns, shoot them in the air, spray bullets all over the place and maybe get bystanders. But I would never wanna be killed in SoCal. You'd find my toes on the roof somewhere if that happened... You'd never find my head. Folks are crazy out there. But it will always be home and I will love it!

I love Texas...although I haven't been to a lot of different parts. I went to Dallas once, and HATED the weather, but i never really did get to travel the city.

I HATED midland and odessa (although i do have good friends in both cities..lol).

I LOVE San Antonio.

And i've NEVER been to Austin or Houston.

Although sometimes I hate El Paso, its just an all around good place. Boring? yeah probably, especially if you are use to having shit to do....but itsa pretty good city. 2nd or 3rd safest city in the US. Friendly people, and just laid back. PLUS we don't have the humidity that East Texas has.

So I just happened to pop on here today and low and behold all this info- and I have to fly to Houston tomorrow to drive to Beaumont for the night, spend four hours in Beaumont Wednesday, drive back to Houston and fly home.

Can I tell you how excited I am after this?

And btw this is my first time to any part of Texas- but for some reason I have always wanted to go to San Antonio- probably because back in the day I met five guys from there and they were all smoking hot!

sorry that you have to go to those places on your first visit to Texas.....bad representation.

Pretty much. Houston, anyway.

Houston is not Texas...so, even though Houston Sucks (which it does, in fact, suck - I just spent the weekend there @ DZ's Southwest Regional Weekend), Texas, rocks.

Grew up in the Dallas area (so it is almost a matter of law that I hate Houston - there was even a Texas Monthly article years ago about the rules of being a Dallasite, and one of the rules was "Hate Houston and everything it stands for, even if you have never been to Houston and don't know what it stands for" or something like that. If you want to see a city suffering the effects of the lack of zoning laws, Houston's the place to be...

Dallas is not perfect, but I liked living there until I had kids.

Grandparents lived in Austin and I was born there, so it has a special place in my heart...it's still a little too humid for me.

Midland/Odessa - big city attitude but podunk.

Lubbock- Way out in BFE, but actually nice place to live (and go to college, I hear)...mild climate year round, low humidity...nice people good school system, but it's a tad too conservative for my liking, not to mention, far away from the "real" big cities....

I too, am saving myself for Kinky. Petition drive starts in 11 days...looks like we have 3 potential sigs here? 44,547 to go.

Hey now...I live here. I have to speak of it....and I have to respectfully disagree w/your assessment...

I am generally not a Texas Tech fan so we might agree there (I only went there for law school). However, I can say that although I thought those other things you said were true before I moved here 5 years ago, I have been pleasantly surprised...the weather you mentioned has occurred here, but it isn't the daily norm (today we expect a record high of 85...light & variable winds). Actually, our average climate is very mild - summers are so much more bearable than any I spent for the first 30 years of life in Dallas...the nights cool down so that you need a sweater & we don't have SMOG (dust storms pass...Ozone alerts tend to stick around all summer in the metroglob)...winters are cooler, but not freezing by any stretch (Amarillo is colder and Midland/Odessa is hotter) we've only had one unbearably cold winter since I've been here, and that was the first one......dust storms are actually not the norm (although w/the lack of rain this year, we expect it to be one of the worst in recent history). It's worse if you live on the outskirts of town (e.g. your house was built on a cotton field), but we hardly noticed inside the loop. Dallas is as almost as flat as Lubbock - main difference is they have extra trees and a few hills...but they also have the pollen (which I can live without).... When I think of disgusting, I think of Houston...Lubbock is just sort of bland....

But, to each his/her own...like I said - I would have agreed whole heartedly w/your comments 6 years ago but now I know better....

What's the weather in Dallas like at the end of April?

I spent some time in San Antonio, and I'm a little on the fence about Tx. The weather their was awesome during the winter and spring, but it did get a little humid by June. I was also dissapointed by the lack of things to do around their ( not a big fan of the tourist traps). I have always wanted to go to Austin though, so I guess I really can't judge the entire state on just SA.

A lot warmer than Boston.

Hah. A lot of places are a lot warmer than here! Especially with the ridiculous wind we've had this week.

Your first mistake was spendin your time in San Antonio

No, I missed the last one because I was sick. But, it is VERY rare for me to miss an Aggie happy hour- no matter where it is. That is how I met some of my best friends in this city, and we always have a blast! :)

I'm still trying to figure out where the next one is, but if you go you should look for me!

BTW- One of the Don's Depot HHs is where I saw Mayor Wynn drinkin' it up with the other aggies. :)