If I'm happy, then why am I crying?
 

I've been in a relationship for four months now, but once in a while, I'll start sobbing for no reason. The relationship is good. We talk almost every night online or on the phone and see each other once a week. We have a lot in common...we're both at the beginnings of our careers, grew up in the suburbs, etc, etc...when we talk, we could go on for hours....once, we were on the phone for three hours!

This never happened when I was single. Has anyone had this experience?

I cry all the time, but it's usually not when I'm sad. I cry when I'm angry, or when I'm frustrated, or like today, when I had to blink back tears of relief after my supervisor told me not to stress because I'm going to be able to get all my work done. :p

Have you noticed anything that seems to trigger the crying?

tears of joy?

Is it a long distance thing? Mine is, and even though it's going really well, sometimes it's so hard being far away from each other that I feel really sad for seemingly no reason.

I never did it when I was single...I didn't miss anything until I had something to miss.

I could be totally off the mark here...so either way, good luck/feel better!

Nope, this isn't long distance. He lives like 15 minutes away from me. I don't know....things are really good right now, and maybe I'm just worried that it won't stay this way

pms??

You have a boyfriend that lives only 15 minutes away from you, yet you only see him once a week?

Things are going great?

Ok. You are crying and you don't know why?



Am I the only one who thinks there is something weird about this?!?!?!?!

Um no you're not, I am in total agreement with you. Unless you're mean like me, in that case I understand why you only see him once a week, that's about all my boyfriends can usually stand of my bitchy attitude....oops. ;)

I find it odd as well. I've never seen someone I've been dating for several months so infrequently. I'd be wondering if he's married with a family or has some big, secret life.

Yes, that is a little weird; I thought so as well.

As for the crying thing; is it because of the relationship, or is it because of something else. Are you really stressed? It could be any number of things.

Try living 1500 MILES away from your boyfriend. You should maybe seek help from a mental health professional. I just moved 1500 miles away from my family, friends and boyfriend, and you don't see me crying about it.

There's nothing weird about it. She's busy. He's busy. They're in daily contact. They coordinate schedules to get together. If she were asking to spend more time with him you'd say she's being clingy. Based on what's she's shared, it sounds like she's being smart about it. Guys aren't the only ones who need space.

The crying could be a way of her soul unstressing. She's trying to fit everything she wants to do and making sure all of her bases are covered. It's not always easy to take time out for just yourself.

I'm thrilled things are going great for Taualumna. You go girl!!!:)

That's just rude. What's worse, crying or being judgmental and snotty on a message board because you think your problems are worse than someone else's?

Cynthia,

maybe you're upset because you miss him?

I know there are times when I'm feeling down because I don't get to see Mr. Pi Phi as often as I would like.

My boyfriends lives 15 minutes away and we only get to see each other on the weekends. We're busy during the week, but still communicate by phone and email. So your situation isn't unusual. People are busy-- grad school, 12 hour workdays, personal errands, life.

You're probably crying due to 1) other factors you're not realizing, or 2) you're just anxious because things are going so well and you're waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Talk it out with your girlfriends. New love can be overwhelming.

Most guys I know don't understand the female psyche, and so I wouldn't recommend talking to your bf about uncontrolled sobbing or trying to have a deep conversation about feelings unless you've been dating a very long time. At this point, the feelings are there, but that connection to just share anything isn't solidified. It will just confuse or freak him out, unless he is one of those rare guys who understands why girls cry for no immediate reason. It's perfectly fine to share that you're happy being with him, and if he does do something to upset you, you should communicate that to him (except in this case, it doesn't seem that he has done anything wrong).

Rely on your girlfriends, enjoy your new relationship, communicate and turn off any Lifetime TV movies!

Ahahaha. Ok. you calling someone else rude? What do you always say? Pot meet kettle?


Why don't you go to Alabama and climb a mountain or something.

Eh, whatever.

I totally do not agree with this. Reason being, in my experience, and from talking to my friends - if it seems too good to be true, then it probably is. In almost ALL of my previous relationships, if I got that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, I just KNEW something was about to happen. I didnt know when, I didnt know why and I didnt know how until it actually happened. But I would always try to ignore that feeling and not discuss it with him because I didnt want HIM to get paranoid, and lo and behold, something crappy always happened.

One of the reasons I knew my fiance was the right guy for me was after 3 months into the relationship, and still no sick gut feelings...

Trust your gut. You're crying for a reason. You dont know what, but there is a reason. It might not be bad - it might not compare to what I said above....but definitely trust your gut.

This kind of cracked me up. Put in simpler terms "Honey, I am marrying you because you're the only man who doesn't make me sick" :D

Heh - PRETTY MUCH! hahah!

Just for the record, this is the most pessimistic post I've ever read on this site - and that includes all of the crap on the Hazing forum, as well as Hoosier's posts. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but this level of pessimism may not serve others as well as it has served you.

Looks like you just trumped me.:rolleyes:

There is nothign wrong with trusting your gut. It's alot better to trust your gut than to be stuck in a relationship that you're always anticipating the "What if?" scenario - and then when it actually happens, you blame yourself.

No sir, not for me. That crap is for the birds.

I can't imagine those two things being the only two options - it's a false dilemma, which was pretty much my point. It's great that it's worked out for you - but there are other issues at play, and as such this strategy (and yes, it is a 'relationship strategy') may not work for others.