Advisor needs advice
 

I am advising a nearby chapter of my sorority and have been doing so for about 2 months. I get the feeling they are not receiving me well. When they first met me they gave me the idea that they wanted me to become another sister of their chapter. I told them thank you, but my role is not to re-live the college experience, and I will attend what they invite me to (academic stuff, meetings, never parties or anything of that sort). They were fine with that, and I figured that I should be one of their advisors first, friend/sister second. I don't know if it is because it is the end of the year and they are tired, but I feel like they have been blowing me off majorly. They plan all this stuff out with me and then never follow through with it. I have a full time job and I am in night school getting another degree. I am too busy to plan around them for them to cancel at the last minute. I don't know what their deal is. I was thinking of quitting and advising another chapter who will be more appreciative. Any advice on how to handle this?

please see my thread, which should have been a reply to your question.

I agree with everything FSUZeta had to say.

What I did was to sit the Executive Board down and go over what did and didn't get done, what went well and what didn't. Then, I compared their sorority experience with work.

"Okay, Sarah, as Social Chairman, planned a Formal for (date). No one would be in her committee, and it fell through. I assume that not one of the sisters wanted to have a Formal this year?"

"Heather, as Housing Chair, did not meet with the full Housing Committee during her year. Therefore, you all did not get any of the improvements that you now see that you need badly - but haven't budgeted for them. Amy, as Treasurer, did not include enough money in her budget for Housing, and yet the Executive Board approved it."

"On the other hand, Hannah did get all of the catsuits properly washed, repaired when necessary, and followed the new standards on ritual equipment - and had an excess in her budget."

"Katie covered each point to her position in Membership Education and we had a 100% retainment! She went a little over budget, but upon asking the Advisory Committee, the funds were happily raised."

etc, etc, until everyone was covered. I would then pass out the basic stats - Name/Office/Budget/Results - to each sister involved, and say, "A sorority is most of your first experience in a corporation. Some of you would have received raises and/or promotions by the way your position was handled. Some of you would have been fired. Let's now discuss what worked and what didn't, looking at it in THAT light."

While I used the same basic discussion more than once, by the second year, things had improved 100%. Their motivation is to get the best job possible, and you are simply showing them how to do so. If they try to use their studies as a crutch (as opposed to a realistic reason for not doing something), then ask them what they would do if while working, their partner took maternity leave and they now had to do the work of two people. IT HAPPENS!

Oh, the last item? No crying. Since no yelling, accusations, or profanity was permitted, neither was crying. Keep it at a business level, and you'll do better at the sisterhood level!

As they say, it's the worst job you'll ever love!

Thanks for the advice and I see what you are saying. However, I can't even get them to meet with me, let alone sit down and go over things. I am thinking back to when it all went sour- they were so nice at first, then again I came on board the week they had a consultant visiting. So maybe it was just for show. It seems as though they want nothing to do with me. I mentioned I was going to put on an educational program for next semester and they got their panties in a bunch! I guess what I need is a detailed description of what they want from me. Communication is the key, though, and I can't even do that! It's frusterating but it is also hurtful, you know?

Of course it hurts! When you were in school, did you fully cooperate with the Advisors?

Set up an appointment with whomever's responsibility it is to set up an Advisor's meeting. Tell them it's a pin attire meeting for the entire board, and you need a hand written excuse for anyone who cannot show up and why. Show up, dressed in pin attire. Hopefully, you have one room where you will stand out. Have your notebook, notes, and pass outs ready. Sit there, ready and smiling, and look at your watch every five minutes. Refuse to be drawn into conversation with anyone else, as "We're scheduled for a meeting at 7pm and I need to be prepared."

If you do not receive 50% participation within a half hour, tell the same person who set that meeting up to set up another one, the same week if possible, same rules. Talk to your superior; she'll have plenty of advice also.

Just like at work - to be an executive, you must ACT like an executive! They have you down as a patsy, and you cannot allow that to continue and still be effective!

Sorry about the double post, but listen to yourself:
1) Who cares about their panties? Who has the seniority here, and who's giving it away?

2) What they want from you?! That's not how being an Advisor works - it's what they need from you! I'm sure that you've been given some sort of Advisors Workbook or Manual - you need to re-read it and realize that THEY NEED YOU!!

I'd set some time aside for some serious soul-searching here. Advising is not for everyone, and many burn out faster than others. Admitting it and moving to a position where you will be more useful isn't failure - it's (again with the analogy!) a "career move".

After reading the replies, I realized I needed to mention an important factor that may or may not be the reason I am feeling left out. I am an AI. I was just initiated a few months ago. I wonder if that has anything to do with the disrespect, for lack of a better word.
Also, I never received an advisor manual. I have asked numerous times for the correct paperwork. Nothing.
Thanks for the advice, though! This semester is pretty much over, but next semester I am going to be more firm. Technically as an advisor I do have seniority, but I am sure there are girls who are not so happy about my AI status. Apparently some girls feel AI's did not "earn" their letters like they did.
But thanks. You have given me much to think about.

My personal strategies for advisory success....

I treat my chapter members like adults--and I expect they will treat me as they would a colleague at work. It is important to be flexible with college students, but at the same time you need to tell them respectfully that you were disappointed that they did not cancel with you sooner. They do not invite me to everything and I don't take it personally.

Maybe I am wrong but I established a relationship with the chapter I advise by telling them, initially, that they needed to let me know what they needed from me--that I would offer assistance when asked but otherwise it was their chapter to run. This was a good way for us to establish that I was not interested in coming in and changing everything. I let them know that I respected their standards and appreciated their campus. With time, they trusted that I knew it was their chapter and the relationship is much more give and take.

I then started reviewing their minutes and reports to the national organization religiously and would offer suggestions to individual team leaders as necessary. I also established that my liaison with the chapter would be the president--and I keep her apprised if anyone contacts me regarding anything administrative. I keep things as 'transparent' as possible. I also told the president that I viewed it as my job to help her be as successful in her role as president as possible--that gained her trust.

I attend their chapter meetings as often as I can (it really should be more often--my goal is at least once a month next semester). At first I observed. If someone asked for my assistance, I would offer it. I only speak up in the meeting if I hear something that is not in line with policy. Otherwise, I pass any critiques of how to run the meeting or strategies for success on privately to the president and/or the key team leader.

I DO NOT engage in any petty personal issues among chapter members--ever (and I have told them this.) If there are issues, I speak to everyone and encourage indivduals to talk things out.

To gain the chapter's trust, I tell stories of my own personal experiences as a leader--the good, the bad and the ugly. They also seem to really enjoy hearing about what other chapters are doing, and they actually enjoying hearing little vignettes of my time in college. They see that I too was once where they are now...and that I understand. When the leadership was accused of running the meeting TOO efficiently and not giving everyone time to speak, I suggested they institute a good and welfare at the end of the meeting so that everyone would at least have an opportunity to speak and share if they wanted.

This chapter went from hiding everything negative from me to including me in their challenges. I never told them that they needed me...I simply was there, and worked my way in by building key relationships with the president and the leaders. I've had to communicate some tough things to this group of women, but they know its because I care and that I share their vision to be the strongest group possible. It's important to set high standards, but also important to remember that their success (or failure) is up to them.

Good luck!!!

ETA: I am an AI too, and its only a factor if you let it be.

Why would AI have anything to do with it?

IF they like you, they like you, if they don't, they won't.

But I am not sure what exactly the problem is other than you feeling left out and unappreciated.

OBviously you can attend any meetings that fit your schedule. They happen weekly. I am sure you posses a chapter calendar so you can go to those events also.

If they shceduled some social time with you, well you said you didn't want that anyway . . . I can see why you might be a little miffed at cancellations . . . but in the grand sceme of things that doesn't seem that important given that you can see them formally weekly.

Also I am not sure feeling unappreciated is fair . . what have you done for them that they should feel grateful for?

Thats not a jab at you, but i have noticed that some advisors feel that their mere presence should generate some type of affectionate gratitude.

So what is there to be firm about?

Also, that invitation of hanging out with the sisters was very nice of them not indicative of rejection. It wouldn't be reliving the college experience for you, it would be giving you an experience you didn't have.

If anything you rejected them and their good hearted offer.

For the record, they have given me absolutely nothing as far as paperwork, calendar, contact list, etc. I do not know when the meetings are because they get changed at times. I was going to go up last week to a meeting and the president called me and told me not to bother because it wasn't going to be a real meeting. She said that the next week would be more effective. This week arrives and the same thing happened, told me not to attend, it would not be worth it.
I don't feel as though I rejected them, I just thought my position was to be that of an advisor. The only rejections I gave were because I was asked to go out with them with an hours notice.
I feel unappreciated because they asked for my help, and I am there to help them yet they are not reciprocating. I am getting absolutely no feedback or communication with them. All I asked for was a contact list so I can get in touch with sisters when I needed to and meeting minutes. I asked for this 2 months ago.

Try scheduling a meeting with the president and eboard. Make sure you let them know that as an advisor your job is to help them and you can't do that if they don't inform you of when things are or cancel at the last minute. If all else fails, when is the next travelling consultant coming up again? Seeing as these girls clearly respond better when they are around, you can set up a meeting with you, her, and the sorority.

Also, get some support from whatever they call your support team... the people above you. I would presume that all of the NPCs have higher level area supervisors of some sort who can provide you with training and assistance. In Alpha Gam, we have Province Directors who oversee 6-7 chapters and who are supposed to be direct support for the Chapter Advisors. Then we have Area Coordinators who support the Province Directors (overseeing 24-30 chapters). All of these women can travel to assist with training and with making sure the chapter officers are trained, have handbooks, are reporting, etc. In addition to those volunteers, there are staff at Headquarters who can assist in getting you manuals and things. You need to get in contact with those volunteers and get some assistance and perhaps some training yourself!

Good luck and don't give up. I have found, as I've moved into various positions with Alpha Gamma Delta, that it takes me about a year to get to know each job well and really get organized with it.

Panhellenically,

Dee

Are you technically their advisor? Like did someone say "you are officially the alumna advisor for XY chapter? Or did someone just say, you can help out with this chapter? There's a big difference. If you haven't gotten any information, then you're likely not an advisor. If you just show up at their door and say hey, meet your new advisor, without actually being their advisor, yeah, you're going to have problems.

If you ARE an advisor, I think that before you do too much you need to learn what an advisor does and how exactly chapters work. As a recent AI, you have not had the collegiate experience and you obviously don't know all the policies, etc. You haven't had the experience of being IN a chapter and knowing sort of how personal relations work, etc. That, of course, cannot be learned from a book, but more observation.

Keep in mind that you're not going to be able to do anything with the chapter until January. It's the end of the semester, most GLOs TOTALLY scale back all activities. Their grades are what's important right now, not trying to break in a new advisor.

I think you need to have a talk with the collegiate director (whatever the title is in ASA) before doing much more.

Where are the other alumnae? Isn't there an alumnae BOARD? Have you spoken to them? If not, you certainly should.

you defintely should not let you being an AI interfere with your ability to advise a chapter. i too am an AI and became an advisor (not chapter) after about a month, then chapter advisor after i had been in it less than a year. all the sisters knew that as they are the ones that initiated with me. i told them there would be a learning process as i learned more about how the chapter worked.

In the meantime, i did know how to be an advisor - making sure officers were following through with what they said they were going to do, helping mediate chapter problems, etc. It took about a year for me to feel fully comfortable with being the advisor. i also got ahold of the chapter manual with all the policies, procedures, officer responsibilities and expectations listed. it took a month or two b/c the old advisor had it. once i did get it, i read it and became familiar with everything in it.

if the previous advisor does not have one or is not willing to hand it over in a timely fashion, call your HQ and have them send you one. you can either pay for it or have HQ bill the chapter.

some social time can be good with the chapter...things like dinner or a movie night so you can get to know the officers and members better. i am still very close to some of the undergraduates and absolutely love them. however, they know that i am (was) their advisor and they needed to keep that in mind. they didn't talk to me about the latest party or how fun it was to get out to the clubs, unless it involved some sort of disciplinary question. you can walk that line of being advisor and friend, but you have to let the women know what your boundaries are (i would never contemplate going out to the bars with them and even at dinner, they rarely had a alcoholic drink -maybe once- and then they asked me if it was ok).

you have a lot of options out there and honeychile has good ideas. you do have to establish that authoritative position with them. i let my chapters know that i was pretty much HQ's rep on a local level so it was my responsibility to make sure they are meeting the expectations of HQ and following the rules. once you establish your position, i suggest beginning to build trust and respect with officers on an individual level by meeting with them one on one and asking how they are doing, what do they need help with, what ideas do they have, etc.

this is a hectic time for students but i usually took advantage of that by taking the pres out to lunch or dinner, my treat, to help her relax and do a stress check with her.

and go to executive board meetings. if i couldn't go to chapter meetings, i would def make it to exec meetings. that's where i would talk the most and had the opportunity to give positive and negative feedback in a closed environment. and i didn't have to hunt down people during the week to tell them something.

another thing to remember is that we often wait to hear from students...for them to tell us when something is wrong or that if they don't contact us, that they don't need us. that is simply not true. as advisors, i feel WE need to make that effort and reach out to the students. they may not realize how they need us or how we can help them until we show them.

i could write tons more, but i'll stop. let me know if you want to talk more.

which office are you advising? for instance, i am the recruitment advisor-i work with the recruitment vp to make sure that the chapter is well prepared for formal recruitment(and for cor if need be) ,i attend their recruitment workshops and recruitment parties, i observe the voting and attend the bid matching and make sure that i know the most current panhellenic recruitment rules. i was formerly the general advisor-i sat in on the executive officers meetings and attended the chapter meetings, which were held on the same day.


different advisory positions require a different amount of time. if you are the general advisor(or whatever asa calls it) then i would imagine your duties would be to attend the chapter meetings and the executive officers meetings. the girls really run the show though. in the executive officers meetings, they each bring information unique to their position to the table, the vp1-coordinator of committees shares her committees plans with the other execs, they set an agenda for the chapter meeting and all this is observed by the general advisor. she is not telling them what to do(unless they are way off base)-she lets them make the decisions. she is there to help keep them on track and to answer any procedural questions they might have. she should be famaliar with the national general manual as well as the colleges rules.

has this chapter been operating without advisors for a while? if so, then the avoidance is not aimed at your personally, but rather, at you the ADVISOR. i would hazard a guess that the chapter thinks that they were doing fine on their own, and somewhat resent an adult presence. this will take some time to conquer, but after a few of the chapters administrations have come and gone, and you have hung in there, they will come to accept you.

i have found giving suggestions, rather than telling them what to do works wonders. for instance, you felt that the chapter would benefit from an educational program. there must be some officer, either elected or appointed that is ordinarily in charge of something like that. speaking to her directly about your idea for an education program might be the way to go. let her make the arrangements, line up the speaker, schedule the time, etc. you just pass on the idea and answer any questions as they arise.

you need a manual!! you should contact your headquarters and request one, be sent to you. you should also have a copy of your national by laws.

do you have an advisory board or are you it? find an older alumna who has served as an advisor and pick her brain. contact the national officer that is over your areas collegiate chapters .

as for not feeling appreciated-i think that goes with the territory. but honestly, how often are you appreciated at your job? does someone say to you on a daily basis,"gee, thanks for X"? most likely not. but i think that most of us who advise do it because, like you, we want to remain connected with our sorority on a local level, and we want to make a difference in some young womans life.

ASAlady -

Dani is right, make sure you are **technically** the advisor. Are you the primary advisor or one of the others (i.e. recruitment, financial etc)? The reason I ask is because some of the state schools require that the main advisor of a Greek group MUST be a faculty member.

As far as not getting your materials etc - let your district facilitator know. Email her on the hour, if necessary.

Yeah, I am "technically" an advisor. I received my letter of acceptance from HQ and everything. The letter directed me to get the proper paperwork from thte chapter, the stuff that was not available from the website. I am meeting with my alumnae chapter this week and the DF will be there. I have voiced my concern to them but I will be more detailed and clear with what is going on. The main reason I posted was to get another POV since national reps are more business oriented, where honestly I kind of feel slighted from these girls. They are my sisters and I don't want to feel uncomfortable around them.
Thanks for all the advice!

What kind of advisor? You seem pretty fuzzy on the details here. Why did you get a letter of acceptance from HQ? Acceptance to be an advisor? Did you apply? What paperwork from the chapter?

Before I worried about how the girls are treating you, I would figure out what exactly your role is supposed to be. You don't seem to have any idea of what your role with the chapter is actually supposed to be. Straighten that out first!

I understand that you're upset that that girls are brushing you off. I can see where they're coming from, as you've been a sister for less time than the vast majority of sisters in the chapter, and now you're coming in and want to tell them what to do, etc. Especially since you don't even seem to know what you're doing (which isn't your fault, that's okay, but you gotta see it from their point of view as well).

I think the collegians always feel a little uncomfortable with new advisors. They need time to get to know you and understand that you have the chapter's best interest at heart. You can convey this by spending some time telling them what they're doing right. I usually get reports by telling my chapters that this is their way to brag about all the wonderful things that they're doing. I remind them that our convention awards and merit programs are all based on the reports that are received. I want them to get credit for what they're doing from IHQ and our International Officers. I encourage them to boast! I challenge them to the best that they can be and to show the world what a great group of women they are. When they do something amazing, I praise them to everybody. When I was at the Province level, I encouraged them by challenging them as a group to be the best Province in the Fraternity. I got them excited about earning stars in our 5 Star Program, etc. They always get excited and competitive when it's Greek Week. You have to get them excited and competitive about being the best that they can be in ALL areas. Be really positive and upbeat. When they see that you have their best interests at heart, they will accept and respect you.

Dee

For those who asked:
Ritual Advisor
They asked me to take on the position (although I expressed interest in helping out in any area) and with ASA there is an application process where we both fill out proper paperwork and the chapter sends it in. The letter is just a formality I guess, to state that I am "official."
I am trying to figure out my role with them, and I guess that is why I am sad that they are not reciprocating with me. I am ready to jump right in and offer assistance! I really hope after the winter break they are enthusiastic about me coming on to advise. I am glad to hear that I am not the only one who has dealt with this (although not really glad to hear it happens!)

Are you a sensitive type person? You keep mentioning feelings and etc. I am not sure that how you feel is all that important.

ITs more important what you do. I think Kddani and others are giving you good advice when they say you need to define your role before you go much further.

This is important because you have an operational role with the chapter that transcends how you may feel or not feel about them.

Also take a deep breath. You have only been Greek for three months. You were only greek for one month before being made an advisor.

ITs a little like putting a freshman pledge on the e-board. So just relax, you have years to learn about the chapter, about its members, and about greek life in general.

In the meantime, get the officer manuals from the national . . . they are usually on the web site, maybe in the sisters only section. They are normally downloadable, if not the national can probably email them to you as an attachment.

Get familiar with the officer roles.

Also, in the meantime take a Servant/Leader approach . . you are there just to help. To help them be more efficient. To just be supportive. You are not there to make it any harder for them.

If they haven't been able to make time for you, make time for them. Meet them on their own time and turf. Be pleasant and not demanding. Be charming. Just listen a lot. You won't know enough at first to really want to be critical.

Do you have any leadership experience? Have you been a budget unit manager or something? Captain of a sports team? President of a club with more than 20 members? Student government? Read a half dozen leadership/management books?

I know I said before that being an AI shouldn't matter, but I wonder why they made a new AI the ritual advisor--that seems a little bit like they may have the wrong person in the wrong seat on the bus. (It's nothing personal, I just know from experience it often takes experience to fill roles like that....going through rituals more than once helps.)

I agree with what everyone has said about defining your role with the chapter--talk with other advisors, talk with the president etc. to determine how your skills can best match the needs of everyone involved.

I do not know if you were Greek as a collegian (I was in a local as an undergrad)--but it can be difficult to learn all the lingo, all the traditions, all structures in just a few months. Even with training, it takes time to acclimate. I was a volunteer for more than 2 years before I felt comfortable with all the specific info about the group, and even today I am still learning.

There are many ways to volunteer--if you're really unhappy as an advisor, you might look into something on the national or regional level where you can learn more about the organization, and still contribute your skills to benefit the organization.

Okay, "ritual advisor". (Which we don't have in KD, ASA's, is this a common thing in ASA?). This explains why the chapter is overwhelmed with you. It seems that ASA wanted to give you a way to be involved that didn't require too much.

A chapter has ritual, what, several times a semester at most? You don't need to be in contact with the chapter frequently, and certainly not with most of the chapter. You need to be in contact with a sargeant at arms or whoever is in charge of setting up the rituals. And maybe the president at times. And you don't need to meet with them all that frequently- maybe once a semester to inventory your ritual equipment in preparation for what's coming up. It's not like you're advising a standards committee or something that needs more involvement from an advisor.

I can *really* see why they would get upset... if someone who has been through ritual once (as an initiate, not even on the chapter side! there's a HUGE difference) wants to come in and tell them how to do it, when many of them have been through it possibly even 6 or 7 times within the chapter.

Today's collegians are OVEREXTENDED like crazy. HQ each pushes the chapters to do, IMO, way too much. By this point in the semester, they're burned out on ASA and need to concentrate on finals.

Honestly, despite your first post, you seem to be looking for the collegiate experience you never had. That ship has sailed. You're not going to be super buddies with the girls in this chapter.

Your advisor position is a limited one. You seem to be trying to force yourself upon these girls to involve to you to a level that you aren't supposed to be involved.

What assistance can you give them in this role? Honestly, close to nada.

You are an ASA alumna, and an alumnae initiate. Get involved with an ASA alumnae chapter. Yes, you can help out with the chapter- WHEN THEY NEED YOU. But your focus should be on being an alumna.

If I were you, before I started getting pissed at the chapter, i'd be a little upset with whoever the National Officer was that had put me in this position, for not providing the materials needed and not actually defining what your role should be.

Ritual advisor is a limited position. At most, I could see you helping out with Preference, whatever new member ceremony ASA has, and then Initiation. I suppose Founders' Day or other special days you have could fall under that hat as well, but it is not like you are the chapter advisor where you will be at their weekly meetings, chaperoning socials, in constant contact with a lot of members.

I would send the chapter a nice email or card wishing them good luck on their exams, and then next semester ask that the ritual chair contact you to make your master plan for the semester - you could arrange to have the catsuits cleaned, see if anything needs to be ordered, plan out dates for the ceremonies so you can make sure you're available, etc.

OK, that clears things up. I would wager they've never HAD a ritual advisor before so they have no clue what she does. This is a relatively new position period. All the collegians know is that it's another adult coming in.

What you might want to do is contact some of the other ritual advisors (ask your DF for how to find the contacts) and ask them what they have been doing in the position. That would probably be your best bet. Start with the other RA's from your district if possible.

But right now is not the time to be doing ANYTHING with the girls in the chapter - they have finals and holidays and formals and are basically stress balls waiting to explode.

I know that you want to not "cross over the line" as far as being an advisor and going out with them and such - but if they feel you are putting up too much of a boundary, they won't want to get close to you or trust you. A very wise sister once told me she wished we could get rid of the terms "alumna" and "collegian" and just all be "sisters." I wholeheartedly agree. That doesn't mean you need to go to mixers with them, but to TGIFriday's or something like that is fine. That's when you really get to bond with each other. It can't all be done during prescribed meeting times and scheduled rituals and workshops and such. Anyone who tells you it can, is dead wrong.

Let me know if you have any questions.

Great advice, 33. I agree, the friends thing is a fine line. But you do have to develop the trust.

I used to have a semesterly outing with my girls-- I advised between 5 and 10 officers and our "sisterhood socials" included lunch at the student union or going to the movies (I was advising when the Ya Ya Sisterhood movie came out-- it was the perfect outing!) And being outside the chapter house was when they could open up, ask questions and see me as their sister in addition to being their adviser. Not everyone could make it, and sometimes it was just me and 2 other girls. But they knew I was a stickler when it came to following policy and could be there for them, too, if they were experiencing any growing pains.

My first boss out of college was like this, too. She was a strict task master, but outside of the office we'd go to college football games, lunch on the weekend, etc--- the relationship was well-defined and I respected her as a supervisor but knew when was appropriate for her to wear her friend hat, too.

We haven't worked together in years, but she remains a close mentor and friend.

I agree with GP. I would maybe attend one ritual meeting and see that the meeting is being held according to ritual, then just as the others said... attend initiation, help them plan dates, make sure they have all the "stuff" they need for rituals.

I would try to take things so personally, you seem fairly new to the organization, so I know you're probably ready to jump in there, but give it time, you'll find your place and they will get to know and appreciate you. :D

I don't remember our ritual advisor attending any rituals - I don't think she even went to Initiation. I do remember her coming to several chapter meetings, and also she was a part of the New Member Ed./Advantage team. And I do also remeber her bringing the god-aweful ASA sing along tape right before our Phoenix Degree. (Shelia, if you've heard it, you know which one I'm talking about). She also went to our final "new member" meeting after initiation to do a thourgh explination of our badge, which was REALLY awesome, that was probably the best thing she did for the new members.

dear asalady, as a former ritual advisor i feel somewhat qualified to share the following suggestons:

as ritual advisor your role to to make sure that the rituals are followed to the letter. you will work with the ritual officer to help her do her job . you may be asked by the other advisors to attend advisory board meetings from time to time, but other than that, you do not need to worry about the other officers. of course, as an advisor you may be called on by a chapter member to be a confidant, but your main interaction will be with the ritual officer and her committee if she has one.

make an appointment with the ritual officer of the chapter, and goe thru all the ritual equipment:make sure it is in pristine order or help her to form a plan to get it in pristine order. if things need to be replaced, suggest that she make a list so that she can present it to the executive officers for the okay to replace the items. help her to formulate a timeline so that these things get replaced in a timely fashion. find out if she has a committee-if she does not, she might like to have one. her committee could help her in setting up the room and cleaning any equipment as needed.

ask her if she feels that all officers(or sisters) who have active roles in the ritual know their stuff. find out if they hold practices so that the ceremonies are flawless.

find out if the every member of the chapter comes dressed appropriately for each ritual. find out what the consequences are if they are not appropriately attired. help to make sure that the consequences are enforced.

you might attend some of the practice sessions before the next initiation, but let them know that you will attend

attend the next initiations to see to make sure that the chapter is attending in the right frame of mind and that all rules are being observed.

if you want, attend any post initiation training the new initiates attend. it will reinforce your own initiation experience and help the new initiates see how important the ritual really is. again make these arrangements with the ritual officer.

Does ASA have a manual for advisors? Many sororities do, and that can help clarify your responsibilities, as well.

When I have served as an advisor I have always tried to allow the chapter to be as self-governing as humanly possible--- I would point out when they were going against their own bylaws, or the sorority's bylaws, but I would very rarely tell them what to do. While I am a sister, I was not a voting member of that chapter, you know?

As ritual advisor, though, your role really is to understand ritual and make sure it is followed to the letter. My first step if I were you would be to familiarize myself with every aspect of ritual I could and become a resource to your officer. Find out what her goals are in terms of helping the chapter and then figure out how you can help her meet them.

Do you have an advisory board chair? She should be a resource for you, too, in terms of training and assistance.

I'm assuming that the letter from HQ was an appointment to the position of sorts. I think it's strange that it sounds like you're supposed to get your manual from the chapter? When I joined my chapter's AB two years ago, the Advisory Board Chair had a bunch of manuals for me - I've kept it in a carrying case to make it easier to lug around. It sounds like you were kind of thrust into this position without a whole lot of training, which is unfortunate. While it may not be as time-consuming as advising recruitment, ritual is still important and I'm sure you want to be adequately informed on all the policies and procedures. Ritual has been one of the positions that I've been advising the past two years as it fall under the Vice-President that I advise.
I also think it's strange that the president said that the one meeting was really that important. Our Advisory Board rotates and takes turns each week attending the weekly meeting because it's required.
When do the officers switch, and new ones come in? Will that be in January? If so, you might have a different experience at that time dealing with your advisee since she'll be brand new to her position and all fired up.

I, too, am a recent Alumane Initiate and am now the Campus/faculty advisor for my chapter, as it is a requirement of every group on campus (not just GLO's) to have a member of the faculty or staff as an advisor, in addition to the Chapter Advisor. I was more than happy to fill the need and although I had NO clue what my official role was, I knew that open communication would be the key with the collegians. I am thrilled to be able to support them as an AI and I really think I have been able to make a connection with them so they can ask me for any advice, suggestions and support as needed. I'm not going out with them to socials or keg parties, but instead attend at least 2 of their meetings a month and keep a steady line of communication via email with the chapter sisters. Since I'm not their Chapter Advisor (actually their chapter advisor just resigned), I wasn't given a manual, but I'm trying to learn as much as possible by asking questions, observing the chapter interaction and inner-workings and by attending meetings.

It's a work in progress being an advisor as an AI, but be patient with the collegians. Remember your life at their age and remember how hectic/crazy things were for you...That's just my 2 cents!

One big difference though is that you are being paid by the University so I would think you have to side with them if there is a conflict of interest.........

Spammer attack!
But I have been meaning to bump this thread anyway to give an update.

My chapter has been working with a consultant. I am so proud of them. They are so awesome, they have come a long way since my post. They just needed a little guidance. I never wanted to tell them what to do with our ceremonies (that is why we have consultants) but now they know and they are doing it. So needless to say I am set with my position and this was a great semester. I dont' think they ever had a RA before. I attempted to contact some other RA's in the area, but there aren't very many, and those I did contact did not get back to me. I may have had a e-mail that no longer works. I met with the consultant as well and that was a great idea.

However, everything is wonderful with the chapter. I am developing a great relationship with the president and we are both attending convention in July. Hopefully, attending convention will help me better understand my role as well.

I really like the girls. I pop in here and there and I try to attend about one meeting a month. They invite me to social things (when it is appropriate for me to be there) and I am really getting to know the girls well. I am developing a good friendship with a few sisters, and I am glad that they consider me more of a mentor/advisor in all areas. For example, a few of them ask me for specific guidance or an opinion on something. I am happy that they are able to open up to me.

I have so much confidence that these ladies will become a crown chapter in no time. (That is a recognition for outstanding chapters in ASA). They are so awesome and I am sad to see the semester end.

Glad You are doing so well and attending You National Convention can be a big PLUS for You!:cool:

If it is like Ours, there are many work shops that are inter active to get information and aid.

It is a lot of hard work but it is a lot of fun.

At our last on, I met a lot of GC LXs there and had a ball, little sleep though!:D