My rush at UNT
 

I wanted to go ahead and start my thread about my rush at the University of North Texas. I am extremly excited about next week, but at the same time really nervous. No one in my family is Greek, and I have no idea what to expect! I hope things go well and I find a home that fits me perfectly!

I have been talking to numerous girls in sororities and all of their advice and insight has been wonderful. I cannot wait to start rush! I am partial to two of the sororities that are on my campus, they seem, by those that I have spoken to, to be great places. However, I am not going to make up my mind at all. I am going into rush with a completly open mind and showing everyone what I can bring to their chapter. My only fear is being cut from all the chapters the first day! Eek, that would be horrible.

There are six chapters at my school and I will begin to update this link right after the infomation meeting on August 23, and then rush lasts for three days after that.

Good luck to all the other PNMs out there!


edited to add more information

WOOOHOO!!! Another Texas Rush thread! Although I didn't attend UNT, I am a member of our Alumnae Association that supports our specific chapter at UNT.

From what I hear, all of the organizations there are awesome!! Best of luck to you!!!!:)

ETA: b/c i can't spell!

YAY for Texas!! LOL. Hope your recruitment goes great!!

Best wishes

Yay! Good luck with rush:)

Ok so I'm a TAD bit biased, but I LOVE the ADPis at UNT. They have always been the hugest help to the Baylor chapter. Good luck with rush!

Yea! A UNT thread! One of my graduate degrees is from UNT, so I'll definitely be reading. Have fun.:)

Sweetie...
go out there and have a blast. dress well, enjoy the experience and totally be yourself.
then see what happens. that's the marvel of the recruitment.

Yay! I have a cousin who goes to UNT!!! She loves it there and says all of the sororities are awesome! Best of luck! I will definitley be reading your story!

Have a great time at rush!!!

I think we have several girls on GC from UNT chapters (including ours).

I hope it goes well for you. :)

Edited
 

Edited to conceal potentially revealing info.

Thank you for all of your support so far. It is great to see so many enthustatic for my experience!

I am not skinny either. Size 16...and was that size when I rushed. Granted, I went to a Northern school, so it could be different than down South, but PLEASE don't let your size bother you. In all honesty, would you really want to join a sorority that cares more about how you make them look with your outward appearance than whatever else it is that you have to offer? I'm sure you have plenty of other great qualities about you that will make you stand out much more than your size--and in a positive way too!

I too admit that I care about what people think about how I look--but it's all about what you wear and how you wear it. Most people don't realize how heavy I am because I wear flattering clothing that's completely in style. I suggest wearing clothes during rush that you feel comfortable and happy in--if you're not worried about how you 'look', then you'll feel more comfortable when you're talking to people. There's nothing worse than feeling insecure and having people know it!

Enjoy your new haircut! That always makes me happy;)

Dont worry...you and I have similar minds. I am not a skinny-minny either. I'm around 5'3 and wear a size 9-11. I am also so very self-conscious about the way I look. Dont let that hinder your rush experience. If a sorority cuts you or doesn't offer you a bid solely on you weight...then you really don't need to be part of that sorority. When you go through Rush, just do your best....let your personality shine through! Just have fun...no worries!! lol.

Oh congrats on the new haircut...I got a new hairstyle too (but I didnt cut my hair, I just permed it! lol)

go girl...
just be beautiful in who you are and let the rest of it take care of itself.

Thank you
 

I would like to thank everyone for their encouragment.

I've decided to talk about my edited post so others that may feel the same, can see that they are not alone with self-indenity issues.


Regarding my edited post earlier. I deleted my post to conceal my identity (because of my worry and that I posted information regarding my fall schedule). I posted that I am concerned with my weight compared to others during rush. I struggle reguarily with such thoughts, and recently have tried becoming more healthy. I had posted that I am scared that my weight will make me stand out from other girls. I am not ashamed of myself, but I do compare myself to other girls reguarly not just with weight, but with style/brand of clothes, personality, etc. Those that have told me to be myself and not to worry, have been so welcomed and helpful. I've realized that to be happy, I need to not worry so much and show others see me but the type of personality and qualities that I possess. I am excited about next week, especially that others have shared their experiences with me.

Thank you again for those that have sent encouraging words.

(Sorry about my poor spelling skills)

You know, I have met many stuck up boring sticks who I would rather chew my arm off than be their sister. Weight doesn't matter, and especially don't add that worry to an already stressful time. Recruitment is supossed to be fun!! Be yourself and HAVE FUN.

Way back in high school and early college I thought that I was hugely overweight. I was 5'3 and varied from 125-135 back then, and wore a size 12. I didn't go out for majorettes in high school because I thought my thighs were too big to wear one of those little skirts. I thought when the guys on campus were hooting and hollering out the dorm windows at me that they were making fun of me. I thought the Tekes who nicknamed me Adrienne (for Adrienne Barbeau) that they were making fun of me. pic of Adrienne, in case you don't know who she is

I thought I was the "biggest" girl in my sorority. In my head, I was.

In retrospect, I look at pics of my whole chapter back then and I realize the truth. I looked great. I had curves, yes. I had a very curvy but short body and thought that meant I was fat. I was NOT the biggest, in fact, I was right in the middle.. not real skinny, definitely not fat. In my head though, I was huge. The result? I decided at some point that I couldn't fight it anymore and if I was fat, I was going to be fat and happy and eat whatever I wanted. I am now a plus size woman and I think it was because I thought I was big all along.

I worry when I hear young women saying the same things about themselves. If I had seen myself realistically back then, I don't think I ever would've gotten as heavy as I ended up at one point. A size 12 is not big.

Dee

Clothing question
 

I'd like to offer my advice, as An Alumna of ADPI from UNT...

A jean skirt will be more than appropriate. And yes, it will be hot, so be cute, but comfortable. :) Does that help?

As for your weight, be yourself. Any chapter that cuts you because of weight isn't looking beyond superficial characteristics and isn't worth being a part of. You will find a home at UNT, but only if you are yourself 100%. :) Good luck!

Any more questions to prepare you for next week??

Ditto on what everyone is saying about your weight.

If the chapter can't look past the outside to see the inside (which is what counts), you wouldn't want to be part of that chapter anyways ;)


As for your clothing. Sounds good!!!!! You must be so excited!!!!

Why did you chose a black dress for pref? I ask because it seems to be that if I were the rusher that I would remember a PNM better by their clothing. I can remember what people were wearing over their names. But that is just me cause I'm a dork that way. I don't remember names I remember clothes. LOL.

best wishes going your way, myersm!!

clothes
 

Personally, I'd say a jean skirt would be okay- but I consider jeans and a jean skirt to be very different things! Check with your Rho Gamma to be sure. One comment, though- since you don't know your seating situation, a skirt may not be best. You may not sit at all, or you may have couches/chairs, but sometimes sitting on the floor may be necessary. If you're comfortable sitting on the floor in your skirt then that's not a concern- if not, you may want to consider that.

Also, for the pref wear (your night 2 outfit sounds great!), if you are set on the black dress I would suggest wearing unique jewelry, doing your hair in an interesting (but semi-sophisticated) way, or having something else that will help you stand out. Generally every member of a sorority will not meet every pnm, or if they do it may be brief, so you don't want anyone to confuse you with someone else!! We always used articles of clothing or accessories to describe people to ensure that everyone knew who a woman was (e.g. she had the awesome long pink sparkly earrings; she was wearing the grey sweatshirt with jeans; she had that really cute red skirt; etc). Also, I know at least at my school some groups wore all black on their preference rounds so that the pnms stood out- that could be different at your school (since the picture has two women with black dresses!). Again, check with your Rho Gamma to be sure. If you love your black dress or are sure that'd be best, definitely do something else that can show that you are unique so people can remember you. I generally don't think of these sorts of things as detracting from the recruitment process- it may be a conversation starter, or maybe it'll just help them identify you.

Hope that helps- and wasn't too confusing! Sorry, I tend to ramble ;-) Good luck with everything!!!

Tonight it begins
 

Re: Tonight it begins
 

Great idea! I don't know how things are where you rush, but what about a colored scarf or something around your neck? I wore a black dress when I preffed, but had a short red neck scarf around my neck. It put a little 'oompf' in my outfit and made it stand out, but it wasn't distracting. When I went to bid day, girls were talking about how beautiful it looked and how great it looked on me. It was definitely a way to be remembered.

The scarf idea is great! Be aware of your color choices. You do'nt want one sorority being offended if you wear another sororities color. I know it sounds petty, but it can be taken that way,.

As for the black dress, you will fit in quite nicely. Most of the PNMs wear black dresses now. It is simple and once you pledge, you have ot have one anyways. :) Way to be one step ahead!

all the best of luck to you...
have fun and as the camera said -- see what develops.

Orientation
 

Have fun tomorrow.

First day!
 

good luck sweetie...
good observations, good thoughts...just see what happens.
lots of water. comfy shoes and a big smile.

Wow, it sounds like half of your experiences were fabulous! That's great! Good luck waking up at 7am (if you can even get to sleep!!) and good luck with your invites! :-D

your observation that you felt the conversation was prepared at cheesecake could be right. your hostess may have been on the sorority side of recruitment for the first time this year, and does not feel sure about herself.she might have been using the "cheat sheet"-the list of prepared questions to use when you can't think of anything to talk about. the fact that it was also the last party of the day might have contributed to the stilted conversation too. remember that while you were getting ready for your first party, the sorority girs had been up for hours decorating, setting up and practiciing for the arrival of the first pnm's.

best wishes that you have a wonderful day today.

Well, I just got my invitations back.

I'm a little disappointed; I only have two houses to go today: cheesecake and cupcake. I was really hoping to go back to snickers, because I had a really great time. THat's ok though, I'm excited about going to the two that I have today and learning more.

I heard so many girls get excited because they were invited back to 4+. I just need to realize that I'm lucky for getting invited somewhere.

If anyone reads this this monring, what are some good things to talk about with the sisters on the philantrophy day? (other than just the philantrophy)

I'm so excited that you kept an open mind and were like "I'll give them another chance". I love "hearing" a PNM say that!!!


You could ask what types of fundraisers they do for their philanthropy? (Like if they have an annual fundraiser that they do every year). You might also ask what the philanthropy means to that particular sister. (I say this b/c we have a sister from Delta Epsilon, where there were 2 chapters AOPi and us. Her daughter had been really sick at one point and she had to stay at an RMH, so when she rushed she felt a connection to ADPi b/c of RMH). Now, this is not to say that every sister has a "connection" with the philanthropy but they might.

Its only 5:30 in the morning here in AZ so I'm not quite awake yet.

Just remember: all it takes is one. I got cut a lot, too, but as long as one good fit continues to invite you back, that's all that matters.

One comment on sounding "canned" -- the last party of the night is often painful for both sisters and PNMs It's really hard to keep focused and energetic through all the girls and all the parties. Glad you're cutting them some slack.

You probably know this already, but you'll want to think back on service projects or fundraisers you participated in during high school, and communicate how much you enjoyed them. Our sorority was very aggressive about our school's Dance Marathon, and we wanted to be sure PNMs would approach fundraising with enthusiasm rather than dread.

Also, if you bring any unique skills to the table -- art talent, calligraphy, webmastering, running meetings, organizational skills, experience with databases, athletic skills, anything -- don't hide your light under a bushel! It's not bragging to let them know you're excited about Anchor Splash because you swam/coached swimming, or excited about helping with party planning because you ran the Junior Prom. Sometimes it's like pulling teeth to get actives to agree to handle some of these jobs, so the thought that someone might actually volunteer to run a formal or keep the website up-to-date can make a PNM look very appealing!

I would ask the sister(s) with whom you are paired if the chapters philanthroopy project have any special meaning or memories for them?

What other charitable projects does the chapter support in the community, outside of their official philanthropy?

I think the other ladies have given you some great advice about what to talk about. I'm very proud of you for keeping an open mind about these two that asked you back. I know from personal experience at UNT that even if you don't get asked back, don't drop out! I have had more women become sisters out of those that didn't get asked back during my tenure than I can count on one hand. And those were some of the best women in the chapter! :)

Another thing you can ask, is what their first semester in the sorority was like? What was the pledge period like for them individually? What events do they enjoy the most in the sorority? What other community service does the chapter do besides their philanthropy. I know there are several on UNT that do more than just their national philanthropy.

You can also ask about sister sororities and campus involvement. Think more on a personal level with these girls than just chapter-wide. Each one of these girls joined their respective sororities for a reason and each one had things that touched them. Ask about these. Don't be too deep, you'll have time for that later, but show interest.

I remember the best advice i was given, If you can walk into a house and know beyond doubt that you can call it home, then you are in the right place.

Remember that these girls may become your sisters. Good luck! And, i'm rooting for cupcake. :)

Round 2
 

I'm sure someone else will chime in on this one, but the fact that you were left alone does not reflect poorly on you at ALL! I might get jumped on for this one, but it seems like bad planning on the sorority's part. It was a golden rule during recruitment at my house, especially this far into recruitment, that PNMs are not to be left alone or left out of conversations. Sorry you experienced that.:(

Bonus though...you enjoyed Cheesecake! Yay...best wishes for a great pref.:D