Things Your Grandma Told You
 

When I was little, my grandma told me stories that influence me to this day. For example, I always keep my hair back in a ponytail when I am using the electric beater because some little girl once got her hair stuck in an electric beater and it scalped her.

I always jump off an escalator in plenty of time because of the little girl who got her toes amputated when she didn't get off of the escalator in time and they slid under the plate.

I try not to let my kids leave the house with their hair wet because some little girl once did that and, of course, she succombed to pneumonia shortly thereafter. BTW, I'm not sure WHO these little girls are; friends of friends maybe? Or maybe it's just one scalped little girl with no toes who caught pneumonia because her hairless head was exposed to the chilly air?

Oh, and I never, ever eat the white part between the rind and the pink part of the watermelon because it'll give me a bad case of the stuchies (the Polish version of The Runs).

Any words of wisdom from your Grandmas?

the only ones i can remember off the top of my head are

- a man's expensive gifts come with a price
- never sew on sundays
- its bad luck to kill a spider indoors

and of course the wet hair one...

- marissa

My father's mother was old-fashioned Swiss, the type that was SO thrifty, the one time she gave me a cookie, she charged my daddy a nickel! Let's be kind and say I didn't learn much from her.

Even though my mother's mother died before I was born, her advice was repeated to me by my mother a gazillion times.

Never leave the house without enough money to make a phone call - you never completely know if the man is a gentleman!

If you end up in the hospital with not-fresh panties, the nurses will assume you're not a nice girl and you won't receive proper treatment.

It takes so little to be kind. Combine that with Politeness is to do and say/The kindest thing in the kindest way.

And lastly (for now!), never let a man see you in hair curlers. Ever. Even if you're married. I was never permitted to come to the breakfast table as a teenager in hot rollers, because my father would have seen me in rollers!

Be nice to your mother, she is the only one you will have.

and the panties one

From my Grandmother when I was in Junior High -- Don't worry, women are like street cars, another one will always come along.

My grandmommy was a flapper through and through. So she had lots of good stories to tell.......

- A woman should never let a man dictate her life.
- Be who you are, and who you want to be.
- Always look like a lady and always look nice. Never leave the house without some sort of makeup. *I live by this one!*
- A lady should know how to dance.
- Make the day count for something.
- Surround yourself with good girlfriends.

I loved my grandmommy! :)

My grandmother always said put your makeup on before you get dressed. If someone is waiting for you, they will wait for you to get dressed - they won't wait for you to put your face on!

Words to live by, I tell ya!

My grandma always said "any cat can have kittens"


She also said that ladies wear pantyhose.

My Grandmother on my father's side was my favorite and I was her favorite...and eveyone knew it!

Some things she told me are still with me, other are just nuts...and I share both with everyone.

The one's I still believe: :D

-No girl should have a boyfriend until she knows how to cook, wash clothes and be able to take care of herself.

-You don't need a man. Anything you need, YOU can do/get yourself.

-Shut the door behind you...do you live in a barn?

-When walking with a man, make sure he is on the outside of the the street, closer to the traffic...if its the other way around, you look like he's selling you, and that's disrespectful.

-Don't sleep with your shoes by your head, you will have bad dreams

-If a baby has the hiccups, but a red string on their forehead.

- Don't leave the house with wet hair.

- "Sana, Sana....


and HER all time favorite:...

-"You're not happy unless I hit you at least once a day!" ;)



The ones I think are just WAY OUT THERE: :eek:

-To cure a sore neck, Take your partners dirty underwear and wear it around your neck at night. In the morning your neck will be better....:o

-If you swallow your gum, it will turn into a worm and live on everything you eat.:confused:

-When your feet fall asleep, its really the devil poking you. To "make him stop" you must make the sign of the cross on the bottom of your feet until it goes away....

-Don't play with your dolls before you go to sleep or they will come to life and steal your breath.



I'm sure there are more, but this is what I can remember for right now...yes, my Grandma was strange, but I loved her soo much, and miss her everyday. :(

Re: Things Your Grandma Told You
 

Thread about this actually happening.

Re: Re: Things Your Grandma Told You
 

Yikes! I bet my grandma's up there right now saying, "See? I told you so!!!"

My grandma told me to never support Manchester United.

Your grandma is very wise! :D

Oh, I forgot one:

If you do the Sign of the Cross in a Protestant church, your hand will fall off!

Yes she is. She told me that if any of her grandkids shows up in a Man U jersey, she will disown them. I hope she was joking. She's a diehard Manchester City fan.

If a little kid bends over and looks between his legs, his mommy and daddy can expect to welcome another bundle of joy pretty soon. (You'd be surprised at the accuracy of this in my family)

Don't clip your nails/toenails at night. Bad luck.

Don't whistle at night or you'll attract evil spirits.

Girls -- washing your hair while on your period will cause it to turn gray faster.

Never turn your back to the ocean.

One can never have too much 20 lb bags of calrose rice.

Wow, when I live with Granny I never got all of the advices.

She just said, Dont screw up or I will whip Ya!

Be home for Lunch and Dinner, here are the hours if Ya want to eat.

While she seemed very big and gruff, whe actually was a Very Sweet Person.:)

Well for someone having a 5 Husbands and outliving the last one!:D

Pioneer Woman, Tuff, Ruff, and Gruff, but a sweety, I was Her Fav!:)

One of my grandmothers died before I was born. The other one lived very far away, so I seldom saw her. So my grandma-isms came to me indirectly through my mother.

- Never leave the house without enough money to get home on your own.

- (If I scowled) Don't scowl, your face will freeze that way!

- Don't leave the house with wet hair.

- If you share a family recipe, don't share the whole recipe. Hold back an ingredient or change the amounts of your spices or something. (My grandmother took her borscht recipe to her grave. Fine by me - I hate borscht!)

- If there is a rosemary plant in the garden, and it flourishes, the woman of the house is in charge. If it is sick or dies, the man is in charge. (I make sure to keep my rosemary carefully tended, and it is indeed flourishing! ;) )

My grandma she taught me to always be ready for company. Growing up in her house there were ALWAYS people stopping by with little or no notice. Grammy was always ready with something she had baked! She and my grandpa were all about the hospitality.

My grandmother taught me all these cute sayings! "Cover a cough or a sneeze and they'll never accuse you of spreading disease" I still remember

Both ladies had a storage freezer in the back room with extra food...I suppose I will too someday. :) And both of course told me not to go to bed with my hair wet, not to go outside with my hair wet etc or I'll get sick.

Two very different ladies who I miss very much...

My Granny is a great Southern lady, and has handed down a few wacky sayings to her family:

-Girls that play with fire will pee in the bed.
-Always check the toilet and the tub before using either one, because snakes and baby alligators have been known to get into them via pipes from sewage drains. (This one, by the way, has to this day left me terrified of getting near or touching the drain in showers)
-Always be the very best you can be, because when you're older and have your own children, they will do every bad thing that you did as a child.

I'm sure there are countless more that I can't think of now!

I only have one remaining grandparent and she is 86...will be 87 in a few weeks. My maternal grandma (aka Nana)

a man's expensive gifts come with a price
make sure you have clean underwear leaving the house
Any woman who depends solely on a man for financial support is a damn fool
Have your own separate account
You don't need a man. Anything you need, YOU can do/get yourself.
Nana was widowed at 31. When her husband died she had 5 kids under the age of 10 and was pregnant...with twins. Yup, she raised 7 kids alone
Don't whistle indoors...bad luck
Don't put your pocketbook on the floor or you will always be "down" (down and out and broke)
Don't sleep with your shoes by your head, you will have bad dreams
Never leave the house without enough money to get home on your own.
Don't make funny faces or it will freeze that way
Cats are evil! I come from a long line of cat haters. Obviously I don't believe that...I have 2 cats I adore! (Yes they are trying to figure out where they went wrong) :D
No laundry or major chores on New Years Day. It must be done before mid night NYE or it is bad luck

Granted I love my grandmother and have a lot of respect for her, but some of the stuff she said is SO out there! :)

Don't eat a lemon while you have your period . . .

Don't walk barefoot while you have your period . . .

And don't hold a baby while you have your period . . .

To this day, I still have yet to know why . . .

If you wear your coat indoors it won't work when you go back outside.

In reference to jewelry..."Big is beautiful, but gaudy is best."

You should see this one ring she has...I doubt I could lift it!

I'm not allowed to own a green car.

My grandma's psychic told her no green cars and because she had predicted my uncles apendicitis correctly, she'd kill me if she ever hear I had a green car. (My grandparent's were strange)

When i was younger my grandma would tell me to wear clean underwear, in case i was in an accident. Now that I am older, my grandma would tell me to not wear any underwear, just to thrill the paramedic!!!

She would always say to be clean when you leave the house-- if you must leve don't have time to shower you should at least take a PTA bath. (P=pussy, T=tits, A=armpits)!!!!

My grandma is quite spunky!! Last time I saw her I was shocked (my grandma comes off as nothing but class) but get her at home and watch out!! She told me a few years ago her favorite part of being old is you can say whatever you want and no one will argue with you, they just think you are old and don't know better!

These are from my Great Aunt Jane, who was born in 1897:

If something gives you a thrill, you should buy it. You'll never regret it.

You can always tell a lady by her shoes.

When a girl can play the piano, she always has friends.

I was lucky enough to have both of my Grandmothers alive, and mentoring me until I reached adulthood...

My paternal Grandmother was an interesting lady, a little ahead of her time (she was a barnstormer at 16, and ferried planes during WW2):
Be who you are, and who you want to be.
Class isn’t about money; class is about dignity, respect, and honour.
She was also fond of Latin... and I remember a few ;)
Nihil Sine Labore “Nothing without labour”
Semper ubi sub ubi (bad Latin pun – “always wear underwear”)
Aquila non captat muscas “The Eagles doesn’t capture flies” (don’t sweat the small stuff)


My maternal Grandmother was always proud of her Scottish heritage, and always sought to pass on her Gaelic wisdom:
Blood will outlast the rocks, a betrayal of blood will outlast the stars (old Gaelic saying, but I can’t remember the Gaelic).
Cha d'thug gaol luath, nach d'thug fuath clis. (“Quick to love, Quick to anger”)
Cha'n aithnich thu duine gus am bi do ghnothaich ris. (“You will never know a man, until you do business with him.”)
Cha'n fheum an ti a shealbhaicheas an toradh am blàth a mhilleadh. (“He who would enjoy the fruit must not spoil the blossom.”)
Cha dean cridh misgeach breug. (“The inebriated heart will not lie.”)

I laughed so hard when I read this! My granny used to say it too!I hadn't thought of that in ages! :p :D

My paternal grandmother and I are not close at all, since she lives half way around the world. My maternal grandmother raised me and always told me never to wash my hair on New Year's or my birhtday (washes luck away)

I was told never to wear too much "rogue" because it makes you look like a prostitute.

Don't ever call a boy- they should chase after you. (Apparently my grandmother knew since she chased after my grandad and he chased EVERY other woman in town:)

Never wear white after labor day or before memorial day-it shows you have no class if you do.

Cross your ANKLES when you are wearing a skirt. If you cross your legs at the knee you can see right up it.

Pay attention in church!