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carnation 05-01-2005 02:31 PM

Radiation and Chemotherapy
 
My father-in-law was diagnosed with lung cancer in November. He had beat it before with radiation but somehow the radiation screwed up his beautiful singing voice. This time they gave him chemo and the cancer didn't advance nor did it shrink. However, the chemo destroyed his sense of taste and wore him out. He hasn't been the same in months, this wonderful, selfless man.

Last month, the doctor said he figured that he had about 2 months to live. :( If my father-in-law had known what the radiation and chemo were going to do to him, I think he would've refused both. At 6 feet tall, he's now down to about 120 pounds and I can only pray that his remaining weeks will be comfortable.

Now I know why when diagnosed with breast cancer, my mother and aunt had mastectomies but refused chemo and radiation. They said if the cancer came back, they'd rather die than go through what they'd seen their friends and one of their sisters did. Luckily, they've been cancer-free for years...but do any of you wonder whether chemo and radiation are even worth it? I mean, I've known a few people to be cured by one or both but it seems like usually, they suffer horribly from side effects and die anyway.

AchtungBaby80 05-01-2005 02:36 PM

I'm so sorry about your father-in-law. :( When my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer, he had all kinds of treatments...radiation for sure, maybe chemo. It made him so much sicker; he couldn't eat because he couldn't stand the taste of most foods, and even smelling food would make him nauseous. He could no longer stand to eat the foods he used to love. It was awful seeing him like that, and I wondered the same thing...is all that worth it?

In my mom's case, I think it was worth it because they caught her cancer early enough to where she's fine now, but they recommended radiation just in case they hadn't removed all the cancerous tissue. The treatments made her sooooooo tired, she couldn't even take me shopping for a prom dress, but now she's all right and I'm really glad for that.

damasa 05-01-2005 02:49 PM

Re: Radiation and Chemotherapy
 
Quote:

Originally posted by carnation
but do any of you wonder whether chemo and radiation are even worth it? I mean, I've known a few people to be cured by one or both but it seems like usually, they suffer horribly from side effects and die anyway.

Yes it does work. Yes it does suck. Yes people do suffer but no not everyone dies anyway.


Yes, it's worth it. In my case it worked and I'm grateful for it.

tunatartare 05-01-2005 03:09 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry about your father-in-law. When my grandfather was diagnosed with leukemia, the doctors told him that the cancer wasn't at an advanced stage and advised him not to go through with treatment for it because he was so sick (heart disease, diabetes, etc.) that the chemo would have hurt him more than helped him. When he passed away, he didn't even die from leukemia.

nucutiepie 05-01-2005 06:32 PM

I have very mixed feelings on it.

My mother had breast cancer when I was in high school - she had a lumpectomy and treatment with tamoxifen, and so far has been fine without chemo or radiation, God bless. (it was caught very early on).

My grandfather was diagnosed with stomach cancer, also when I was in high school. They gave him six months to live and recommended chemo and radiation - my family decided that if he was dying anyway, it was heartless to make him suffer through chemo and radiation. He wound up living four years and was relatively comfortable for three of those years.

My friend was diagnosed with cancer this year. He's 22. He's suffering through chemo and radiation now, but his long-term prospects are excellent... i guess i think it's strictly a case by case thing, and the age of the patient is important.

Tom Earp 05-01-2005 06:57 PM

Dad Had Radiation, hasnt been the same since!:(

Will bite a bullet first!:) Take it to the bank!:(

Just love The Cure thatr fucks up Your Life from on out!:mad:

CUGreekgirl 05-01-2005 09:10 PM

Sorry to hear about your father in law

If it weren't for chemo and radiation I would have grown up motherless.

When I was 8 my mom was diagnosed w/ breast cancer. After her masectomy she had radiation. Because she was not able to work during this time she become my 2nd grade class' "class mom" I loved that my mom who was usually otherwise busy with work was able to use her time during radiation to devote to me and my class.

Summer 2003 she was diagnosed w/ colorectal cancer. She had to go through radiation before and after surgery as well as chemo before and after surgery. She dropped down to 90lbs (she's 5 ft 2). Chemo left her drained of all her energy, but she never gave up her will to live. It only took a few weeks after her last chemo for her to be back to her old self. She is now 67, works 30 hrs a wk (she considers that retired), participates in Bible Study weekly, is a member of the Red Hat society, takes care of 4 rambunctious dogs, cooks and cleans. yes, I thank god daily for chemo and radiation treatments.

aephi alum 05-01-2005 10:24 PM

I'm so sorry to hear about your father-in-law, Carnation. You are all in my thoughts and prayers... every one of you who has been through this or has had a family member or friend go through this. Chemo and radiation therapy are difficult treatments to endure, but they can help if the cancer is detected before it spreads.

honeychile 05-01-2005 10:44 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry to hear about your father-in-law.

I am very fortunate that my knowledge of cancer is from work, not my immediate family. What I've noticed (as a geriatric counselor) is not whether or the cancer patient selects radiation or chemo or both - it's their attitude. If the patient has a positive attitude, a need and desire to survive, he will do MUCH better than others. When negative people are around, it's harder to maintain that attitude.

Crazy as it may seem, I really do feel that some people in this situation chose when to die. "I'm going to dance at my daughter's wedding!" or "I'll be 60 in two more months," or whatever - many clients have asked me the date, as if they're counting out their days.

I'm sure your family will be do their best to keep your fil comfortable. I truly hope that they can prolong his quality of life!

Peaches-n-Cream 05-01-2005 10:46 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry that your father-in-law is going through this. You and your family are in my prayers.

I can't really comment with any authority about chemo or radiation.

AWJDZ 05-02-2005 09:24 AM

I am soo sorry to hear about your father-in-law...

all of your families are in my thoughts and prayers.

3 months ago, my mom was diagnonsed with colon, liver, and lung cancer. One of her diabetic meds. had masked all the symptoms and she had not had a colonospy (sp) in about 7 years. She is 57 years old and they believe that she has been walking around with this for about 3 years. Her meds. made all of her lab results come back normal and her symptoms were the same as the side effects of the drug.

She has been on IV chemo and takes 2 doses of oral chemo for 21 days and then 7 days off. It is rough, there is no getting around that. She also goes in for iron infusions, platelet replacements, shots, and how knows what else. There is not a day or night that I do not pray that we will all get through this. She is very determined that she will do what it takes. If it were not for the chemo, they said we would have around 4-6 months with her. Her cancer counts continue to drop after every round. Her dr. is very hopeful and optimisitc. There days that she does suffer, she is tired, and she feels like crap....but for every day that she feels like that, there is a day were she shops, cleans, gardens, and lives normally. We pray that one day, all of her days will be like that.

My grandfather was diagnosed with pancratic cancer, refused all treatment and was gone with weeks.

GeekyPenguin 05-02-2005 10:03 AM

My mom had radiation when I was 2. She's been in remission since I was 3. I'm almost 22. I'd say it was worth it.

honeychile 05-02-2005 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by AWJDZ


My grandfather was diagnosed with pancratic cancer, refused all treatment and was gone with weeks.

Not to be a voice of gloom and doom, but pancreatic cancer is usually the hardest to beat, and the quickest. :( I usually cringe when one of those cases come in.

FSUZeta 05-02-2005 12:16 PM

dear carnation, i too would like to let you know that your father-in-lawand your family will be in our prayers.

i agree with an earlier poster, that chemo and/or radiation sre best decided on a case by case basis. i have a dear friend here in naples who had lymphoma-she literally almost died. they gave her massive doses of chemo and brought her back from the brink. this was about 8 years ago and is doing great. but, as honeychile says, attitude seems to make a huge impact . my friend never held a pity party and was constantly upbeat and positive. a true rolemodel!!

our niece was diagnosed with lukemia when she was 5. chemo cured her. she is now 16, healthy and a star athelete!!

astroAPhi 05-02-2005 12:48 PM

carnation, I'm so sorry about your father in law. My grandpa's funeral was a week ago from today, so I understand what your family is going through. In his case, it seems like it was more the treatment that killed him than the cancer. He got too dehydrated from the chemo and had an infection in his mouth. The cancer was supposedly gone, but they told him he should finish the treatments anyway. A whole lot of good that did him. To be fair, he was 80 years old and lived a good long life. But I wish we had just forgone the treatment because he was simply too weak to do it.

My other grandpa passed away from cancer a year and a half ago at age 83. The small doses of radiation he got were enough to keep him comfortable and give him about 6 more months with us. He never got sick from the treatments and it was only his last few days that were bad.

I think chemo and radiation can do wonderful things for some people, but isn't a viable treatment for all people. In the case of the elderly, I think it's just a good idea to make them comfortable so that they can put their affairs in order and go out peacefully.

trojangal 05-02-2005 07:49 PM

Candie,

I am sorry to hear that things are not improving with your father-in-law.

Medical decisions are so hard to make, whether it's cancer or any other major medical threat.

My college mentor did the chemo and it wore her out when she had it; she was 'cancer-free' then went back to work. A year and a half later the cancer was back, and she opted not to do the chemo because of how severe it was on her. I also saw a friend with pancreatic go in less than 3 months, and it broke my heart.

I'll continue to keep all of you in prayer, your father-in-law for healing, and you all for strength.

Hugs,

Cheryl

AKA_Monet 05-02-2005 08:17 PM

I hate cancer!!!
 
Given that my Sorority's chapter in my location JUST gave a "health forum" on several issues, including colorectal/prostate/breast cancer this past Saturday; I have come to realize that I HATE CANCER as a disease to study and as a disease in people... It is unbearable to watch those that suffer with little options for survival...

Key things to consider:

The American Cancer Society, The Susan B. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation and the National Lung Institute have several guidelines as to how to "predict the survival outcomes" in patients that undergo some kind of treatment options.

The main idea from my own Sorority chapter's event--of which I chaired this committee that put it on--"the early caught, the better the outcome".

Now some cancers are just too invasive and it won't matter what treatment you give, it just won't respond...

However some cancers are completely avoidable with constant monitoring and check ups by healthcare professionals. Considerations of familial histories are important as well as poor environmental factors, i.e. smoking, abestoes [sp?], eating a high-fat diet and obesity...

Carnation, I have no idea about your FIL's case and I cannot comment, legally...

However, I am interested in how and why chemotherapeutics cause heart failure in some cancer patients... There are numerous underlying genetic factors that play a role in the response pattern to a drug from various organs...

The other issue is, no matter what, if you get old, you will have a problem--i.e. pick your poison--either you die from cancer or chronic disease (heart, renal, hypertension complications, stroke, etc.)... The onset varies from early exposures to environmental toxins or genetic components. But getting checked on a consistent basis is of the utmost importance. As well as, educating yourself immediately upon diagnoses to cooperate with your healthcare provider for the best treatment option...

There are drugs out there that are NOT FDA approved, but are still in clinical trials... This may be a last ditched effort, but could be a saving grace for some patients... One has to be persistent in getting onto a trial... And they also do "hospice treatment" when someone is on their last leg...

However, the interesting thing is "stem treatment" with "suicidal vectors attached to a drug bomb" and HAART therapy might work as a future to destroy cancer cells...

We will beat this cancer thing... In the meanwhile, keep the Spirit and Hope alive--participate in the Cancer society activities--they are for research...

AWJDZ 05-02-2005 09:58 PM

one thing I have learn through my mom's ordeal is that there are hundreds of different chemo treatments. I was always under the impression that chemo was chemo....you get sick, throw up, feel miserable, you hair falls out, etc. One of the effects of one of my mom's chemo (she is on two different types) is that she VERY sensitive to cold. She can not eat, drink or touch anything cold while she is on it. It will actually cause her to freeze up and choke. Hair loss is not a side effect of either of hers. She only experiences nausea when she goes in to get a shot (that one that they advertise on TV, I can't remember the name, but it starts with a P) All and all, I think she is doing very good. Her dr. says that being on two different chemos at one time is very tough, but she is a very strong willed, tough lady.

AKA_Monet, I'm with you...I hate cancer too. It has effect me from a very early age...I lost my nanny when I was 10 from oral cancer, my grandmother had breast cancer, my granddaddy had prostate cancer (but is doing VERY well at 87), my papa had pancratic cancer, and now my mom with colon, liver, and lung (no she has never smoked, it was just that far spread when it was found). I hate it, I hate it, I hate...and I pray that one day there will be no such thing!

carnation 05-02-2005 10:46 PM

Thank you all for your words of support. It's a rough time for the family now. My father-in-law is totally alert, although he can only whisper to us. Supposedly he doesn't know how little time he has left but you know, he's not stupid...all of a sudden, all his brothers keep visiting from out of town and people from church are visiting in droves. Just like when his brother was given a couple of months to live several years ago.

Until he had chemo, I didn't know that one can receive it and not lose hair or be nauseated. He didn't have those side effects but it wrecked his body. Thank God he's not in pain.

EEKappa 05-03-2005 11:27 AM

Carnation, I am so sorry to hear about your father in law. I hope that he is somewhat comfortable.

To answer your question re: radiation. My only experience is my step-dad's. He first had prostate cancer in '92, which was treated with radiation. The radiation created some gastro-intestinal obstructions, which when inspected revealed stomach cancer in '94. He's also had several occurrences of invasive skin cancer on his temple in the past five years, which was also treated with radiation. Though this treatment has created problems above and beyond the cancer, we are thankful that he is still with us (at 85) and enjoys some quality of life.

A co-worker beat stage 4 breast cancer 9 years ago with chemo and a stem cell transplant. She's been healthy and vigorous until just now, when hysterectomy revealed ovarian cancer. She's off for more chemo, but as her doctor said "Last time you were on fire, this time you're just smoldering."

Hugs to you and your family at this difficult time.

moe.ron 05-03-2005 01:53 PM

One of my aunt recently passed away because of cancer to the throat. I know she had chemotherapy, but it was too late by then. Just wanted to send much love to Carnation and her father-in-law.

AKA_Monet 05-03-2005 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AWJDZ
one thing I have learn through my mom's ordeal is that there are hundreds of different chemo treatments. I was always under the impression that chemo was chemo....you get sick, throw up, feel miserable, you hair falls out, etc. One of the effects of one of my mom's chemo (she is on two different types) is that she VERY sensitive to cold. She can not eat, drink or touch anything cold while she is on it. It will actually cause her to freeze up and choke. Hair loss is not a side effect of either of hers. She only experiences nausea when she goes in to get a shot (that one that they advertise on TV, I can't remember the name, but it starts with a P) All and all, I think she is doing very good. Her dr. says that being on two different chemos at one time is very tough, but she is a very strong willed, tough lady.

AKA_Monet, I'm with you...I hate cancer too. It has effect me from a very early age...I lost my nanny when I was 10 from oral cancer, my grandmother had breast cancer, my granddaddy had prostate cancer (but is doing VERY well at 87), my papa had pancratic cancer, and now my mom with colon, liver, and lung (no she has never smoked, it was just that far spread when it was found). I hate it, I hate it, I hate...and I pray that one day there will be no such thing!

Although I am no expert in this, your mom is cold sensitive because she lost a lot of "fat cells" with the chemo... Fat tissue insulates organs and are environmental sensors--hot/cold exposure. How these fat cells work is under intense research, because 1) they can become cancerous rapidly; or 2) they affect other organs causing chronic disease, such as heart/renal failure and attack, diabetes, obesity (if they enlarge), etc...

Your mom may have a genetic predisposition that was unknown at the time of her diagnosis that her fat cells are highly responsive to the drugs... I would demand they keep tabs on that by measuring blood glucose levels, because sometimes the side effects of chemo drugs is diabetes and fat cells play some role in that process... Just tell them to keep an eye on it...

Susan_Renee 05-03-2005 05:43 PM

Carnation, I am so sorry to hear about your father in law. I'll be praying for you and your family.
Personally, I think the whole is chemo or radiation therapy really worth it just depends on the person and their views. I think the best thing anyone can do is research it and become aware of what they may go through if they decide to go through with it, talk to their doctors, and really consider if they think it's going to be worth it. Many people dont, many do. It has good and bad characteristics. Everything does really. Radiation, for example, can cause cancer as well as help treat it. Yes it's hard, not only for the person, but us as well (I've been through it with a family member too). Not everyone is helped by it, but many, many people are. Because of that, I personally view it as a good thing with good possibilities, but all this is just personal opinion.
Anyway, I'm very sorry. You're in my prayers.

wrigley 05-03-2005 06:39 PM

Carnation, I'm sorry about your father-in-law.

When my mom went on chemo she suffered the side effects of nausea, vomiting, hair loss, and lack of energy. Even though her cancer is in remission she still suffers from some numbness in her hands and feet. Lifetime side effect courtesy of chemo.


My mom's sister died last year of lung cancer. She had previously survived colon cancer 12 yrs. ago. When they found the cancer this time it was too far gone. Chemo and radiation wasn't going to give any extra time. It was a quality of life issue for her and she was surrounded by her family when her time came.

AWJDZ 05-03-2005 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AKA_Monet
Although I am no expert in this, your mom is cold sensitive because she lost a lot of "fat cells" with the chemo... Fat tissue insulates organs and are environmental sensors--hot/cold exposure. How these fat cells work is under intense research, because 1) they can become cancerous rapidly; or 2) they affect other organs causing chronic disease, such as heart/renal failure and attack, diabetes, obesity (if they enlarge), etc...

Your mom may have a genetic predisposition that was unknown at the time of her diagnosis that her fat cells are highly responsive to the drugs... I would demand they keep tabs on that by measuring blood glucose levels, because sometimes the side effects of chemo drugs is diabetes and fat cells play some role in that process... Just tell them to keep an eye on it...

I think that the sensitiveness to cold is a side effect that is directly from one of the chemos (pos. the pill one) because she is not sensitive during her 7 days off. She was also already diabetic before the cancer. One of her meds (gluecophage (sp?) ) masked all the signs and symptoms until she had the very rapid weight loss. She has been taken off of almost all of her blood pressure meds. and diabetic meds. She still keeps track of her sugar levels and is very aware of what she eats. Right now, her goal is to start putting weight back on. It is hard because she doesn't want her sugar to get out of control and a lot of the sugar replacements they use now (sugar alcohol) she is allergic to. She eats a lot of atkins protein bars and shakes inbetween meals. I am sure all of this complicates everything she goes through. I know how hard it is for me to handle, I can't imagine what she goes through.

Carnation~ hang in there!

AKA_Monet 05-03-2005 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AWJDZ
I think that the sensitiveness to cold is a side effect that is directly from one of the chemos (pos. the pill one) because she is not sensitive during her 7 days off. She was also already diabetic before the cancer. One of her meds (gluecophage (sp?) ) masked all the signs and symptoms until she had the very rapid weight loss. She has been taken off of almost all of her blood pressure meds. and diabetic meds. She still keeps track of her sugar levels and is very aware of what she eats. Right now, her goal is to start putting weight back on. It is hard because she doesn't want her sugar to get out of control and a lot of the sugar replacements they use now (sugar alcohol) she is allergic to. She eats a lot of atkins protein bars and shakes inbetween meals. I am sure all of this complicates everything she goes through. I know how hard it is for me to handle, I can't imagine what she goes through.

Carnation~ hang in there!

Explain to me what her diabetic diagnosis clearly is? Did she have a type II diagnosis or a MODY? Glucophage is a drug that "forces" the sugars into cells... Well chemo kills ALL growing cells. If you overeat, fat cells grow... So chemo drugs kills growing cells... Some chemo drugs do it specifically, others do it generally. I suspect your mom's oncologist made the chemo drug determination based on the "kind" of cancer that your mom had--i.e. the "pathology" of it--is it a "carcinoma", a "squamous cell tumor", an "adenocarcinoma", a "lipoma", etc. Those kinds of things are done in pathology labs under microscopes with specific slides and stains... Hence the reason they biopsy these things...

However, if your mom had diabetes before she had to undergo chemo, AND she dropped weight drastically after the chemo, and if she has a decent blood count and does not need EpoE (sp.?), then she really needs to stay away from that "perservative foods", like Atkins unless the medical doctor told her to eat that stuff...

She ought to be eatting more lean cuts of meat, preferable fish (salmon) and chicken--free range, organic and LOTS of broccoli... She needs to live off of Chicken broth to gain weight and boost her protein levels with whey powder or soy if she can handle it... In fact, if her cancer is not related to estrogen levels, then she would WANT to be drinking SILK on a DAILY basis... And red meats are out of the question--too carcinogenic... She can eat pork, but it MUST be little fat in it--like the extra good cuts...

All of this is to say if she can keep her food down...

I'm sorry, but those bars are just too risky to eat given that she probably has metastasis to multi-organ cancer... Too many carcinogens in these bars... And they screw with your blood insulin levels too... And all that processed drinks that you buy in the store--NO... You need to see the food before you make a smoothie...

That is my PROFESSIONAL OPINION based on my scientific research with cancer and diabetes--why they go hand in hand--nobody knows...

carnation 05-06-2005 03:38 PM

Well, we'd been told that he was in no pain but BlazerCheer just came in and reported that he has a prescription for morphine. :( And even though he supposedly doesn't know that he hasn't got long, she saw his will on the kitchen table. This is happening too fast.

EEKappa 05-06-2005 04:25 PM

(((((Carnation and Family)))))

carnation 05-18-2005 06:36 AM

Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night


Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

-Dylan Thomas-

He has only days left. He looks like a skeleton but he's still fighting. I am going to miss this man so much.

AUDeltaGam 05-18-2005 10:39 AM

:(

*hugs* to the Carnation family!

AWJDZ 05-18-2005 10:42 AM

my thoughts and prayers are still with you and your family. I could not imagine going through what yall are dealing with. be strong....

leesek 05-18-2005 11:24 AM

Carnation,

Hugs and prayers for you and all your family!!!!

My dad died from lung cancer 20 years ago. He knew he had it and refused all treatment. We didn't know until he was in the end stage so we only had 8 weeks to come to grips with it. At least it was a very short time for him once the cancer totally took control.

I was diagnosed with Breast cancer in 12/03 and I had bilaterial mastectectomies and did chemo. For me it was worth it. I never got sick but did lose my hair and was very, very tired (took about a year to get all my energy back) but I would do chemo again if necessary.

As others have said it is a very personal decision and every cancer is different.


I love life!!! I will do all that is necessary to live!!!

carnation 05-19-2005 12:01 AM

:( :( He's gone.:( :(

Dad, I know you're singing with the angels tonight with that beautiful baritone voice that God has given you back.

Peaches-n-Cream 05-19-2005 12:04 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by carnation
:( :( He's gone.:( :(

Dad, I know you're singing with the angels tonight with that beautiful baritone voice that God has given you back.

I am so sorry for your loss. You have my deepest condolences. God bless your father in law. May he rest in peace.

ZTAngel 05-19-2005 09:13 AM

I'm so sorry, carnation. :(

Maybe we can reschedule the ATL meeting for another time.

AOIIsilver 05-19-2005 10:43 AM

My deepest sympathies to the entire Carnation nation....
Silver

tunatartare 05-19-2005 03:58 PM

Sorry for your loss Carnation. You and your family will be in my prayers tonight.

trojangal 05-19-2005 11:51 PM

Candie,

I'll be praying for all of you tonight and this week.

Cheryl

MSKKG 05-20-2005 12:22 AM

Candy, although I knew your FIL was ill, I just saw this thread. Please accept my condolences for your loss. Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Dionysus 05-20-2005 01:58 AM

Sorry for your loss. :(


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