My son is going to flunk 1st grade
 

My son brought me a note yesterday from his teacher. First off, the note was dated 3/29/05--my son gave it to me yesterday-- not a good start.

The note said he was being recommended for retention. She wrote his math skills are good, social skills are good, lots of friends, etc. but his reading skills are lower than where they should be.

I understand the reason, he needs a good foundation to build upon-- but my kid isn't suppose to be held back.

He has been in the reading recovery program in school this year and is improving, but he is not on the reading level he should be.

I called Sylvan Learning Center today to get him signed up for the testing, so he could get back on track. Sylvan better work-- they are a freaking fortune. $48 an hour, you can prepay in 100 block installments foir a discount of $45 an hour. But if it works it will be worth it.

I have an email out to the teacher to see if Sylvan will help enough that he won't have to be held back. I talked to him last night-- poor guy was so upset.

-wendi

WWCD?

-Rudey

Check out summer school in your district. We know of several children who went and the teacher decided that they'd picked up enough to be promoted after all.

Wendi,

Are there any students studying education in your area who might want to help your son? College kids are not going to charge you an arm and a leg for tutoring.

Best wishes,

Cynthia

Maybe not even that high... try high school students looking for community service hours and even jr. high kids with higher GPAs. But I would go the Sylvan route as a last resort. My brother did something similar... Kumon, I believe. I don't think it did him much good or at least that's what he said.

As someone who is getting a Reading Assessment certificate, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE do not make your son go to Sylvan! All that Sylvan does is have one-on-one time with the student, that is all. Also, that is all it takes :) I would highly suggest that you have an Education student (an "Early Childhood would be best) to help your son. It can help the student and your son, believe me!


If you don't mind telling me, what kind of reading problems is he having? Is he just missing sight words or having trouble with phonics? Does he comphrehend well his reading selection yet prounciates the words incorrectly or the ther way around?

You can PM me also!!

For what it is worth, I second not going to Sylvan. Some of the students I know who have utilized their services were not satisified with their results for the amount of money spent.

I would second looking into tutors in the area. Hopefully, you live in an area with college students around (I would go with a college student as opposed to a HS one because of the maturity level and because of the education behind them). I would expect to pay around $20/hour. I would call your local college's education department and ask the advisor how to recommend recruiting someone. Sometimes, depending on the size of the university, all you need is a flier with your information on it, and you should get some calls.

Good luck with this!

Wendi..pm'ed you about possible Alpha Gam help:D

Wendi -
As a first grade teacher, I was shocked as I read your post. I can't believe your child's teacher would send a note home about an issue as important as retention. In my school district, the process for considering retention is a very comprehensive one. There is a lot of documentation that needs to be filed as well as multiple conferences with the parent, teacher, and a member of our administration (usually the principal). I encourage you to contact your child's teacher about the possibility of not retaining your child; it sounds like he has a solid base with his social skills and other academics. Reading Recovery is an excellent program that is designed for students just like your son; with that extra assistance, I would hesitate to retain him.

As far as tutoring, I would also agree with the other posters who suggested exploring your options. While I have seen some success with students who have gone to Sylvan, it is a "canned" program. Working with an individual tutor could be a more cost-effective and successful option for your son. A program could be build around his specific needs and interests.

Your son is very lucky to have such a caring mom who wants to see him succeed. I wish you all the luck in the world; please keep us informed about what is happening.

Courtney

I'm not a teacher, nor is education my specialty, but when I was in highschool I went to Sylvain for math. I did not help me one bit. I was not given the attention I needed from sylvian and they did not help me with the remidial math skills I needed. It was an afterschool program where I did my homework, and i wasn't even helped with that.

Do not send your son to Sylvain.

look on the positive side. i dont know if this was state-wide or just district only, but if he does get held back and kicks azz in high school by graduating in 3 years, he recieves a $1000 scholarship and still graduates with his original class. they did that at my school.

I'm no expert so I can't really offer an advice, except to echo what others have said (Try Sylvan only as a last resort--they are way overpriced and an individual tutor could probably do just as well!). My mom once told me that my kindergarten teacher was going to recommend that I be retained--yes, I was about to fail kindergarten :p--but apparently I improved so much during the last couple months of school that I got to go on to first grade with the rest of my class. Maybe it'll be the same in your son's case...there's still time!

Thank you everyone for your input.
To answer some of your questions--- my son has issues with his sight words-- often a complete lack of recognition. The Reading Recovery program gives him 30 minutes one on one with a teacher each day. He brings home a book to read every night. For the most part he does great with reading those books, but anything else is a nightmare.

I emailed the teacher this afternoon and still have not received a response. I am very surprised I received a letter sent home in the backpack as well. I would expect that something as serious as retention would have resulted in a phone call, conferencing, etc.

Regarding summer school, he is already enrolled. Our district used the Summer Adventure program by Newton Learning. I am not sure how much teaching is done; I do know the students get paid for attending ($100 for perfect attendance).

Regarding Sylvan, thank you for the input. We are going to do the test. When I talked to the lady in charge of the early reading program she is a certified teacher but just moved her in Jan and has not got certified in MO yet.
Thank you for your input- I will post when I know something

Wendi

My brother was faced with a similar situation when he was in first grade. He is honestly better at math than I, a college sophomore, am, but he can't read well because of dyslexia. While I don't recommend you take the extreme action my mom did (she pulled him out and is homeschooling him), I do suggest you look into other options. Maybe it has to do with the teacher? That's what part of my bro's problem was. Also, instead of Sylvan, try to see if you have a local literacy council. My mom works at one, and that's where my brother goes for tutoring. They are usually free, and it's all volunteers, so it's people who want to be there. Good luck, and I hope everything works out!!

My mother taught me how to read when I was three. I even won an award for it in the first grade but I was categorized as slow because I struggled with math. My father tutored me with math when ever he was onshore but it quickly became apparent that I needed extra help. My parents turned to Sylvan Learning center for outside resources. I can honestly say that it was a complete waste of time. It would have been cheaper for my parents to sit me down at the kitchen table and force me to do my homework. The only good thing about SLC is that I picked up a few dates while I was there.

/sidenote: Even though my math skills border on unbelievable my reading and writing skills have always been above testing standards. Please do not take your sons short comings in a subject area as a deterrent. As important as it is to encourage him to improve it is almost as important to encourage him in his strengths. I promise your encouragement will help balance him out more then any paid tutor.

/sidenote x 2: I’m fucking wasted.

hey

i just wanted to offer my voice of support. I hope everything works out for you and your son!

What would Collin do? I'm glad you asked...

Actually, the high school student idea is really good. At least at my high school, there were a large group of people who volunteered at local elementary schools. College students might work as well, but a high school student would probably have more free time outside of their own classes.

I'm also surprised the teacher hasn't responded as of yet; most teachers should be happy that a parent responded so quickly.

I second to finding out the root cause (if you had not)- before you do anything else. He won't get any help until they find out exactly what is preventing him from becoming a good reader.

I heard Mel Levine's book, One Mind At a Time, is good for discovering your child's acedemic strengths and weaknesses.

I actually heard a segment on Dr. Laura (I know, I know) the other day dealing with this same topic...

Her advice to the Mother was not to retain the child, as each child develops different skills at different times. She believes that holding the child back would be far more detrimental in the long run than promoting them with a lower reading level - as long as the parents are aware of the situation and are working on it. Even though I don't usually agree with her I think I agree on this point.

Good Luck with whatever you decide, and for the record, I second the advice of getting an Education major as a tutor.

I'm an elementary education major like a lot of people on the board and I echo what has been said - you don't need Sylvan! Reading is one of those skills that is best developed with lots of practice and personal attention.

I think it would be a fantastic activity for you and your son to take on becoming a life long good reader together. Set aside a half hour (more if you have the time!) to read together at least 5 times a week. Set a plan, go to the library and get some books and stick to it!

Talk to your son's teacher about diagnosing his current reading level - she should have tests she can either do, or give you to do. Talk to her about how far he realistically needs to come to be "on level"

I agree with everyone else - she handled this all wrong. you don't send a note home about something as important as detaining a student! Kudos to you for being so proactive.

I would have to suggest if you do not get anywhere with your son's teacher by the end of the day on Thursday, call and talk with the school office, hopefully either the counselor and/or the principal, and the district office. See if you can set up 2 meetings. One for parent(s), teacher, counselor and principal/district-staff-member. And a second one that includes your son.
At the first one discuss all options to assist your son in catching up on reading skills. At the second one discuss with your son what will be done to prevent him from being held back and get him enthused to "git-r-done".

Yeah, no I was thinking of someone else.

-Rudey

WhatWouldCraigDo?

Bingo.

-Rudey

:D


I'd beat his ass with a belt and make him read to me every night until he could read and comprehend better than most in his class. He wouldnt be allowed to play any sort of game or sport until he accomplished his task.


ETA: I had the same problem when I was little only it wasnt because I was dumb. I just never did my reading when my teacher told me to. My mother thought I had a problem but my dad thought otherwise. So when there eventually became problems at school my dad beat my ass with a leather belt and then made me read to him every night for 1 year straight. Today I'm the better reader out my sibling and I and my SAT score in the reading section was a 700.

Also, that tutoring crap is bullshit. People need to learn to make their kids do what they want them to do. Its much easier for a child to learn than an adult.

Is this the same kid who is trying to have a six-pack?

yes it is.

Wendi,

You need to put in a formal request for Special Ed testing now. They are required by law to do it within 30 days. If he's doing that great at math and is struggling with reading, there could be a processing problem that only Special Ed teachers are trained to deal with. All the tutors in the world wouldn't be able to help him if he's LD and simply doesn't perceive things the same way as the rest of us do. The school is REQUIRED to address these needs at no cost to you. It sounds like he needs more than Reading Recovery has been offering. So, request that evaluation and make sure they do it. If he does have a learning disability, he could go to first grade for 10 years and it won't change without a specialist's help.

Dee

So you're saying her son is retarded??

-Rudey

Thats what I got from her post, too.


Unless the kid is a retard and is mentally disabled severely, he doesnt need all this testing most of you are saying he needs. Thats whats wrong with those little fuckers today, they're used to their mommies and doctors telling them something is wrong with them constantly and sooner or later they start believing that crap and it becomes manifest in their lives. If everyone got tested for everything people say get tested for and are then treated, doctors would be the most wealthiest/powerful people on the planet.

Educated people should realize that learning disabilities are in no way correlated to IQ level. People with learning disabilities have brains which process some types of sensory stimuli in a different way, making it difficult for them to learn a particular skill in the manner that it's typically taught in a classroom. With early intervention and accomodation techniques, they adjust. Schools are mandated to intervene and make those accomodations.

Dee

Wendi-As a former teacher with three degrees in Education, I agree with the advice given by Dee about the Special Education testing. They will be able to find out if he has a type of learning disability, and it IS a long process. On another note, I am upset about the way this was handled-a note? A note written in MARCH? You should have been notified and forewarned by several conferences way before this point, so that you could do what you are doing now. I feel the school principal needs to be aware of how the teacher handled this. If not now, for fear of teacher retribution, then at the end of the school year. There is NO excuse for that lack of communication.

I'm a current first grade teacher. I have been teaching for 7 years and have retained a few children. I have tons of advice, but not a lot of time right now! Please PM me and I can try to help you.
Aimee

Sounds to me like you guys are wanting her to find some learning disability issue with her son. Everyone has something wrong them, does that mean everyone should get massive testing done that will probably be long and drawn out? Do any of you realize that it could be a small matter that could easily be corrected without the advice/help of doctors? Doctors arent going to tell you nothing is wrong with your child or else they dont get paid. They get paid to find something wrong with your kid and, in many cases, if there isnt anything wrong they usually make up something or intentionally find something wrong with your kid so you can spend more money on tests and procedures. And what about the son here? What is probably a small issue that could be corrected with the help of both parents could easily turn around and become something much much worse. If the kid keeps having people tell him something is wrong with him then he's eventually going to believe it and end up with all sorts of problems. I know this first hand because it's been done to two cousins of mine (boht males) by an aunt who thinks something is wrong with her kids because doctors and my grandmother keep telling her something is wrong but they're not sure what it is. :rolleyes: They say both of them are a little slow and they're always needing tests doen on them. Its gotten so bad to the point where one of them now has gashes on his head from where they did "tests". Its ironic, though. Everytime they go and see my parents they act totally normal and different than when they are with their mom and dad. They don't act sick, dumb, slow or anything. This has led my immediate family and I to believe its an attention issue, not a thinking disorder. Something was wrong in the family life and it affected the kids and eventually it ended up to other people thinking something is wrong with them. Its out-right sick and enrages me, my brother and my parents that both of them are being put through all this crap and the whole family thinks they're both a little slow when they're really not. We realize that my aunt is a shitty parent who has been married 5 times now and its now affected them to the point where they had problems in school and now everyone thinks they're mentally handicapped to some degree. I spent a couple hours with them both not to long ago along with my borther and both of them were fine. But as soon as they got back around their mother and her husband....they acted completely different.

I'm not saying this is the issue with wendi, not saying it's a possibility she's a bad parent. But what I am saying is that maybe the boy isnt getting something from one of the two parents that he needs or maybe there are some problems in the home that have affected him and its showing up in school. All I'm asking, wendi, is that before you go and get this testing done (since you've already did the extra help stuff you mentioned) talk to him about other things and find out if anything in his home-life is bothering him. Asking him if everything is ok. Obviously he's afraid of something or doesnt feel that he can come talk to you because he was so late in bringing that notice to you. Its apparent that he feels like he can't come to you about everything otherwise you would have seen that note a lot sooner. The boy is in first grade, he's too young to feel stupid talking to his mom about anything....so there might be deeper issues. To give you an example, when I was about his age I did shit that would get attention and I didnt realize thats what I was doing. When I'd get bit by a bug or scrapped while playing, after a scab would form I'd pick it off. It would piss my parents off to no end. My mother thought something was wrong with me, my dad didnt understand why I wouldnt quit. Eventually, after seeing a guidence counselor, they found out I did it because of attention and issues in the home life. I didnt have some sort of illness or mental problem like some people thought. It was suggested that my parents pay me 5$ for every week I didnt pick a sore when i'd get injured or bitten by a bug and within a 2 months I didnt do it anymore. That and the homelife changed, my dad stopped being so hard on me for every little thing I did wrong. After that things were fine. Why don't you suggest to your son that every time he does well in his reading you'll treat him. If you can't afford paying him to get over this try treating him to his favorite dinner or take him somewhere he likes to go, maybe even the zoo. All that testing should be the last resort...it's the worse thing a kid can go through and often times it leads to more problems and the kid will grow up thinking somethign is always wrong with him and that he isnt normal. It doesnt take a rocket scientist to know that isnt good for a child at all.

Cashmoney

as someone who went through the testing, I agree wholeheartedly with cashmoney

as a teacher for 5 years i have some different opinions.

first off, none of us know your son so please don't listen if people say "oh he doesn't need retention" or whatever. get involved with your son's teacher and do what's best for HIM. some students DO need retention, and the only right time to do it is usually kindergarten or first. never later.

second, sylvan's "edge" is that they test your son a FULL YEAR below where he really is. then when he makes all this "progress" your son seems like he really improved when he's really where he needs to be.

third, i'm a reading specialist and i charge $65 an hour. unfortunately if you want a qualified person who can make a major improvement in your son, you need to pay a premium. honestly, high schoolers have no idea how to do anything but help with homework. college reading majors can probably help and won't be as expensive. if your child really needs major help, pay for the one-on-one tutor. if you get a good one, she's worth it. ask for references and recommendations.

fourth, i know that i am REQUIRED to send a "FYI" home to parents about retention based on certain requirements but for most of them i would never even CONSIDER it. it's just a technicality and unfortunately makes some parents freak. i don't want to do it, but have to. look into it.

fifth, meet with the teacher BEFORE you meet with the principal. the principal will probably have no clue about the history of your child. if the teacher is being difficult and won't talk to you (not the next day, rather if she continues to put you off for a week) then call the principal. DO NOT CONTACT DISTRICT ADMINISTRATION. they know nothing about specific children.

sixth, with regards to special ed (i teach in a blended/inclusion classroom) it's 30 CLASSROOM days, which is over 3 months. don't expect anything to happen this school year. honestly. but it doesn't hurt to look into things. ask the school psychologist how to begin the process.

it really doesn't seem weird to me that now is when you'd be hearing about retention. i know i am not ALLOWED to say anything about next year before may. nothing at all! crazy i know, but those are my rules. it sucks.

best of luck to you and your son. please PM me if you need anything or have any questions.

Yea, no shit man. That crap sucks and more often than not the kid doesnt even need the testing. All thats needed is some serious time invested with the kid with BOTH parents involved.

Actually, the testing I'm talking about is done by a psychologist, not a medical doctor and it involves doing puzzles, math, answering questions verbally. Typically, if a child is having emotional reactions to a stressful situation, they would perform poorly in all areas of education, not just in reading. Wendi said that he is doing well in math and that his verbal skills are good, he is just having trouble with reading. I agree that ADHD is WAY overdiagnosed, but that isn't what I'm talking about here. We all have things that we don't do well. I can't carry a tune in a bucket. My eye/hand coordination isn't very good so I'm not good at things like ping pong, tennis or hitting a baseball. Lucky for me, these aren't necessary life skills so I don't bother doing anything about it. With the right activities and some adaptations, I may be able to do them. When the skill that someone has trouble with is reading, it will affect their whole lives. Children are perceptive and realize that other kids are doing things that they can't do, which can also cause a lot of stress. All I was suggesting is that they do the tests to find out if there is a learning disability. It could also just be that he's really good at math and is focusing on that and not putting his efforts toward learning to read because it's boring or something. It won't hurt to find out though. I'm not talking about medicating the child or doing invasive medical tests. I'm talking about IQ testing combined with achievement tests. When there are abnormally large differences between IQ subtests or a big difference between IQ and achievement, they can use that information to figure out how to help him learn to read. If he is with his class developmentally in every other way, holding him back may not be the best idea. He could be able to stay with his class and just get some extra help on the side from the special ed teacher. When kids need help with speech, they go to the speech pathologist. If they need help with reading, they might need to go to the special ed teacher for a little time each week.

Dee

I know what kind of tests you are talking about, they are hell. He might not realize everything about them but later on he will. If you decide to test him then please realize he will need lots of extra love and attention during the process.