Racisim within the African American Community
 

Hello Good Brothers(not in the fraternal sense but the cultural sense :) )

I have a problem (hmmmmm) and need to get a solution to why BLACK people act the way they do. I come from a normal (at least i thought i did) until i got to college!! I couldnt believe the drama i got for being MIXED. My father is italian and my mother is black and irish. For some reason BLACK people didnt like the fact that on my father's side it's not uncommon for the men to marry women who are..well white. What is the big deal about marrying a white women and why do the children of mixed race deal with so much flack. They call me "bougie", "stuck -up" "too good" and all kinds of things. I never thought of myself as being better, but it's other who believe this. whats the big deal about marrying a white women.

Oh Lawd--here we go again.
 

My good brother (in the cultural sense),

For me the issue is not about marrying White women, but it is about the motives behind marrying White women. They are not always just about "love."

But I am sure PHAShriner will answer your question in depth. ;)

Re: Oh Lawd--here we go again.
 

:rolleyes: OY! I am sure he will :rolleyes:

Re: Oh Lawd--here we go again.
 

LOLOLOL

I'm sometimes called "bougie", "stuck-up" "too good" and all kinds of things like that and I am not "mixed". :)

Philly's Psycho-Ancestoral ?
 

Hotep Brothers. Mr. Philly, you have posed a very all too common question w/regards to your ancestoral makeup. This is a very complex yet rather simple subject matter. For starters please obtain Frances Cress Welsing's "The Isis Papers" and examine her finding and view of the BLACK GENE and its dominance. You will be able to grasp part of the answer through Welsing's work, but you must go deeper and conduct empirical research and thought provoking analysis whereas you will come to terms w/the importance of tackling Psychophisiological Historical Synthesis and you will surely begin to awaken to the FACT that due to the BLACKMAN'S GENETIC MAKEUP and GREATNESS there exists an underlying FACT, that his GREATNESS is in QUALITY not QUANTITY! One can have fair skin yet be w/more VISION than a SELL-OUT who is as dark as TAYE DIGGS. Catch my drift? You dig where I am coming from? Your GENETIC composition by virtue of you having a BLACK MAN in your GENETIC TREE is cause for you to rejoice and smile. Your stating of having irish genetic composition is really no big deal. The "luck of the irish" is pale in comparison and is of NO MATCH to the "POWER of the AFRIKAN!" Stay tuned. more to follow.:cool:

Re: Oh Lawd--here we go again.
 

I agree with your point - what are the motives and yes, you knew my frat was going to take it there - lol

...
 

any motives that anyone has regarding judging someone because of their cultural background, race ethnicity etc has to do with issues of self. you must be pretty low in character to want to denegrate a person because of who their parents are.

phashriner makes a great point in that you need to keep up with your history. there is so much informationout there discussing our culture and where this awful behavior comes from that you want have the time or energy to engage someone who's mad because they think you have the market cornered on easy living simply because your momma was white and you have'good hair'.

we've got bigger issues to worry about. so tell those haters philly interest to slap some conk in their hair and keep in moving:rolleyes: .

Re: ...
 

The original poster made no mention of his hair texture.

Re: Re: ...
 

*insert lightbulb icon here*

But I think Darling1 was also referencing my post about motives. Unfortunately, I have heard too many Black folx say I want my children to have "good hair" or light skin, therefore I want to marry accordingly. I even had my own mother complain that one of my high school bfs was, too dark and she did not want her grandchildren to be that color. Dang, it was highschool, we weren't even that serious. :eek:

Re: Re: Re: ...
 

Gotcha. He or she could also be referencing his or her experiences.

But, he or she seemed to assume the original poster had a certain grain of her enough to tell the "haters" to put some conk in their hair.

The funniest thing is that black/white does not necessarily equate to lighter skin and a certain hair texture. People who forget this have forgotten the relative "strength" of black genes and that race mixing is not a simple matter of "yellow+blue=green."

Re: Re: Re: Re: ...
 

So true.

Re: Racisim within the African American Community
 

Sweetheart, it is all in the difference of "mental slavery" of the Afrikan mind...

The difference between the "house" and the "field" negro...

The difference between "desire" of what is the quintessence of "beauty" and what is considered down right "f-ugly"...

As others have mentioned, you need to do your research on the topic.

As a start, rent the video, "Feast of All Saints" as a jump off point, then go into more detail...

As you meander through these travels, if you can get to the transcendence of watching "Sankofa", then the Universe might speak to you and evolve your wisdom accordingly...

Stay blessed.

thanks lady greek
 

i was commenting from a general standpoint. hair texture/grain is another stereotype associated with your complexion. my comment about conking has to do with my belief and experience that those who are darker toned have self-esteem issues. on some level they want to be lighter and have the 'good hair'. it was my attempt to be slightly lighthearted.

btw i am a woman.

Re: thanks lady greek
 

Gotcha.

Your attempt at lightheartedness really does nothing more than feed into stereotypes and colorism nonsense. People of all shades of blackness have self-esteem issues. All of us were ridiculed by whites. Lighter skinned blacks were simply told that we were more acceptable and more beautiful than are our darker skinned brothers and sisters. Lightskinned and darkskinned blacks actually believed this nonsense and it became ingrained in our mindset and socialization. THIS is why we have colorism within our community. THIS is why darker skinned blacks sometimes pick on lighter skinned blacks and vice versa.


Thank GOD that I was not raised in a color struck and hair texture conscious family. My family loves its diversity of hues and hair and you will NEVER hear us talking about who is whatever complexion and who has whatever type of hair. We are all beautiful...period.

Re: Re: thanks lady greek
 

For real. That's silliness at its best. Some of the old folk really need to check themselves. Also, we must realize that colorism goes both ways in our community and there are just as many people who I know who feel self-conscious about their light skin. Therefore, it is a problem that affects us all. It's all crabs in the barrel and, although Willie Lynch was proven not to have really written the letter, it's still the Willie Lynch principle exemplified.

Crabs in the Barrel.

And to the posters who have experienced negativity. We *all* have. There is nothing more or less unique about your experience. Children tease (about any and everything) and unfortunately, some college students (and some adults) never grow out of it. This is not unique to the Black community so I disagree that it's something that we do to ourselves as Black people. Others do it as well. Do you know that in every culture, there is the notion that if you are lighter or have lighter hair, you are more beautiful? It happens in various cultures (Latino culture for instance). We all just have to learn to ignore and have a little confidence.

SC

good point..
 

i think if nothing else we agree that this whole issue is nonsense. i wasnt raised in a color struck per se. my family preached knowing your history at the same time relaxing my sister's hair and telling me that i have good hair so i dont need to get a relaxer. we all have issue, no doubt. this is one that i wish in the grand scheme would just go away.

Re: good point..
 

Your family wasn't "color struck" but it was "hair struck" and that is ignorant.

Re: Re: Re: thanks lady greek
 

Yeah, I was teased for my light skin by my peers. I was told that I thought I was cute because I have "lightskin and long hair." I was told that "God didn't keep me in the oven long enough." In the past few years, I have been targeted by brown and darker skinned "pro-black" and Afrocentrics who feel vindicated by uplifting darker blacks at the price of telling lighter blacks that we aren't "black enough" or "lightskin is ugly." As if we all can't be uplifted and beautiful.

It is stupid.

Re: Re: Re: Re: thanks lady greek
 

Wow, you are light-skinned with "good hair?" Who knew? :D

Re: Re: Re: thanks lady greek
 

Oh honey, ain't that the truth? As much as I love my grandmother, she is guilty as sin and yes I called her on it. Quite a few of my kin are guilty as all get out.

"She is so black but she is really pretty". :rolleyes: If that is not a backhand, I dunno what is.


Yes, I was targeted when I was younger because of my dark skin and my loving summer outdoor activities.
I still love summer outdoor activities and could care less how dark I get in the summer :D

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: thanks lady greek
 

My hair is GOOD because it is healthy, thick, and long.

But, my hair is no where NEAR "finely textured." I was once told "you're the ONLY friend I have with NAPPY HAIR!!! The rest of my friends have silky, thin textured hair!!!"

;)

Good thing I never miss my relaxer touch-ups. :rolleyes: :cool:

Good hair definition according to me:
if it is on your head where it should be and you like it, then it is "good hair"

period.

Re: Re: good point..
 

amen!!!

for non-thoroughbreads
 

download the song by PETER TOSH entitled "AFRICAN".

<----- has thin textured, NON-silky hair. ;) Wouldn't grow long because it broke off so easily. Now, locs=long.

Your hair is GOOD because it is PRETTY and HEALTHY. :D