Cock-Blocking Methods Discussed Here
 

This thread is for all the blockers out there. You know who you are.

I need to copy and paste my story from sophomore year into here. But for now, I will leave you with a great method used at Cans in Chicago last night:

"The dude you're talking to got in trouble for date rape...be careful"

-Rudey

Re: Cock-Blocking Methods Discussed Here
 

Ahhhhh, the old date rape card. The only thing worse than that one is when they say you're friends with guys who've been accused of it and then the girl tries to make up her mind on what to do.

This was my story from sophomore year that I posted in another thread:

OK for this I will bring up my friend in Sophomore year of college. I received the biggest cock block of my life that year. Basically I'm at a New Year's Eve part and I'm holding this girl and saying all these lines that would make you want to barf. We're about to go to this other's dude place and I'm set. My friend basically asks me to get him something from the car because he's sick. When I get back, he's holding the beeyotch. Hence, the Shasty McNasty Cock-Block of Sophomore Year.

At this point you might think I was out for the count. But no. If I'm not getting any play, then nobody will. Cock-blocks all around. Said friend got a quick rabbit punch to the back of the head. He threw up within 10 minutes. I told another girl that one of my friends had an STD so he got blocked. And the first dude that got punched went and put a cold can of beer between a girl's legs that was hooking up with our other dude (Edited to add: I think he also reasoned that she was ugly so he was in fact helping the dude out but I am not sure). Hence cock blocks all around. That was the Shasty McNasty Cock-Block Festival.

What does this story have to do with anything?

Nothing really, except to say that since then I have vowed never to just willingly accept a cock-block. Never again will one of my boys put his arm around a girl I'm talking to and pull a block. Never again.

-Rudey

Re: Cock-Blocking Methods Discussed Here
 

One classic night, summer between sophomore and junior year in college . . .

My buddy Jim, notorious for slumming when in a slump, brings a fairly busted female friend to a fairly busted party in Ames (shocking). She's a bigtime whore - I think we counted 6 people just in the party who had slept with her, but Jim's looking pretty proud and very sure of himself. This cannot happen, obviously, b/c we as his longtime friends growing up have drank enough booze for us to decide, uh, this cannot happen.

Well, Jim tries to introduce us . . . he is met with these two responses:

Brent: "Oh hey - I'm Brent. Jim, is this the girl you told us was a sure thing?"
Tony: "Jesus Jimmy, I thought you said she was a six . . . wow."

Hilariously enough (well, for us anyway) the girl still came home with him - we raced back in an attempt to create a harpoon out of paper and hang it from his door, but didn't finish in time, and instead had to teabag his pillow.

It's lucky there are online dictionaries, to help understand all this! :D :p

These are pretty funny stories.

Has anyone seen girls cockblock?

most girls' cockblocks are far more subtle, and generally more vicious, than dudes' - guys will make up all sorts of STD stories, but girls cut throats.


"Wait, you know she had an abortion over the summer, right?"
"She's slept with over 30 guys."
"You know she's still fucking around with (ex-boyfriend), right?"

Everyone gets a good laugh the next morning over joking about the clap, but usually girls go for personal details . . . more proof that the truth is worse than fiction.

Guys cockblocking other Guys
 

Doesn't this contravene the "Guy Rules" ?

Re: Guys cockblocking other Guys
 

What are you talking about? I cockblock like it's my job and I own the company.

-Rudey

Re: Guys cockblocking other Guys
 

No - it's more of a game with buddies. You do it to each other, and the best cockblocks live on for years as funny stories.

I don't know how close you are with your boys...but in my circle, we don't cock block each other when it comes to chicks. Every girl is considered fair game to anyone as long as it isnt one of our girlfriends. Its that easy. I think its stupid...why try to phuck up your boy's pussy just because you can't hit it? You should suck it up and move on to the next girl in line. When I think about cock blockers....its other girls who do it.



Just my 2 cents.

I HATE getting cockblocked. My best friend does it to me all the time. So in return I always cockblock her. Usually by just hitting on the guy to divert his attention to me. Then when she walks off I wait until I see someone and I know and go "OMG Josh!!!" I run off to say hi leaving the guy standing there.

Haha.:D

Exactly. Hell, if one of my boys is getting ass I'll cheer him on. Just like they'll do to me when I leave the bar with someone. I don't think I'd be friends with someone that tried to fuck my game up all the time...I'd probably kick them in the nuts.

For us, girls aren't the end all be all of our lives. For us, girls aren't some difficult thing to get. Other guys may see things differently.

The whole point of this is to be cool and to joke around but at the same time not end up the chump.

-Rudey

Now why y'all interested in being a bunch a cock blockin' suckas mudda fcukers?

I mean, like DAYUM...

If you gonna pimp, roll with the tight ride... And don't hate the playaz game...

If you treat all women like ho's, then you will get caught up with one of dem... It's called the Ghetto Games 3000... You'd be some baby's daddy... If not already...

But a woman can slam yo' chit too, if you don't watch it tightly... However, you will lose out... Be roamin' around all poked like in "Boomerang"...

Forget the game... Just don't play... Do it for the sport of it...

and you all think I type in slang?

anyways. i wish i would have discovered this thread sooner. Nothing works better than playing that, " philosophical card" on a girl because then they will see you are deep and that other guy is a chump.

Or how about the " ohhh you are goin out with him!? :eek: look. Then just walk away.

Or the...." hey you are hot what are you doing with this guy?" (be careful, that will most likely start a fight)

how about the one where you walk in between them and start talking to the girl only.

hmmmm or the " i wouldnt trust what he puts in my drink" line

man there are many more i just can't think of them.

There are various methods of doing this:

1) You go up to her while they're talking and put your arm around her and as you all talk you keep getting more flirty.

2) You see them dancing, so you walk up from behind and you dance with the girl too and the dude becomes frazzled so at that point you totally dominate and take her as your own.

-Rudey

Have you ever seen that skit on Dave Chappelle with the Hater's Ball? http://www.breadmansworld.com/hatersball.wmv

It's not as mean as that, but it's funny like that.

-Rudey

I was expecting an answer like that.

I can find much better ways to 'be cool and joke around' than trying to cockblock my friends.

I started flirting with this guy's girlfriend at a party once. He came up to me and was like "What's Up?" So I said "if we were in prison, I'd make you my bitch." Oddly enough, he left the part and went home. I thought for sure he would have wanted to fight me. Anyway, I cockblocked him by flirting with his girlfriend. Hell yeah.

dude you're way too cool for this thread, sorry it was posted - rough stuff

-RC
--my buddies hit on gross girls - hence they get blocked. capice?

Put a cold can of beer in between her legs. That was hilarious.

-Rudey

KSig RC-
If you cockblock your boys from sleeping with nasty girls when they ae intoxicated, then isn't that wingman behavior? What's the difference then?
-M

A wingman gets you a hot ho...there is a difference.

-Rudey

It's sort of similar, perhaps the photo-negative of the wingman. Usually the "wingman" is there to up the ante, and give you a better shot at a girl; in this case, he's serving a similarly altruistic duty by saving your ass from crabs and/or cellulite, but in a different capacity. It's sort of like training a dog - you give them a treat when they do well, and a swat with the paper when they do wrong. Same general goal, different implementation. Oh, and also the dog's not super bombed and probably isn't being beergoggled into oblivion.

you guys are funny.

I've heard guys calling one of my friends a cockblocker because she gives my phone number out to guys she thinks I should date, regardless of whether or not I'm seeing someone. That makes for some awkward situations...

Unintentional cockblocking, as in having ugly people around you is the worse...

I've always used the wingman to...take the grenade.

This is also acceptable behavior, assuming your wingman is a.) drunk and/or b.) not picky (or c.) just lucky to be along for the ride)

"diving on the grenade" is quite the feat for the wingman - earns himself a beer and probably some serious jokes