What's going on?
 

I notice that often in our listserv in yahoogroups, we get new alumna's who join and post messages that they haven't come because "they don't know anyone". Well I sent out an Evite (Come to our New Member Social) and planned an event for the first week of October geared specifically to new members. I know the first week of October is still a few weeks away but NO ONE new has signed up yet. Anyone have any ideas on how to get these ladies involved? It's not like we don't have at least one or two other events each month either. I know we could call and personally invite people but outside of that, I don't know.......

Did these new AI women have sponsors or contact women during their PNAM "rush"? If they did, maybe use these women as people to be an assigned buddy for alumnae functions. Other options are sending real invites through snail mail, calling them, or having an alumna "stop by" to invite them. A lot of tactics used during the traditional collegiate new member period can work, though distances may be larger.
You might also ask some women who are involved with Junior League what their tactics for making new members comfortable with the group are.

ETA: if these are not AI women and are simply alumnae new to the area, assigning a buddy may help for them, too.

Dont know anyone? Tell them to get off of the dead square one. Sounds better than asses and meet NEW PEOPLE.

My God, they are of the Same Greek Organization and had the same letters, Badge, Ritual.

I guess I am different, I love meeting My Brothers from all over the LXA Fraternal world.

I am about the oldest that theyb might meet, but, that is why I stay Young thinking.

Damn, people are stupid. Cats have more sense of being!:rolleyes:

Find other alumnae that live close to the new members and have them call and offer to pick them up for the event. That way they can meet a 'regular' person in a quiet setting for a little while, then the 'old' member can introduce the new girl around to the other alumnae.

Is there also an alumni newsletter you could advertise in?

Hey, well, I know it is "summer" and all but still no luck with attracting new alums to our events really. It is kinda discouraging, especially when I've noticed they sign up to come to stuff and then it's no call/no show. We have been "advertising" in our National mag and on our website. I am personally thinking of just waiting until the fall again to start stuff up. Thoughts anyone? By the way, I've also sent out the emails to say that if they would like to meet up beforehand, I will do so. Nothing.

As much as I love email, unless you have a relationship with the person, it my not be personal enough to get these women out of their comfort zone. Actually calling them on the the phone and talking might give them a better sense of "knowing" someone.

You have to think of it like recruitment all over again - or in this case COB. You can't rely on the woman to come to the house for COB, you have to go get her to make sure she shows up.

I'm like Tom, I love to meet women from all our chapters and don't have any social anxiety about showing up where I know no one. Of course I also travel as a volunteer so I have done it many times over. But, I know that everyone isn't like this and some need more hand holding than others. Maybe a phone call will be enough to get them hooked. :D

NYC Alum groups
 

We are still having trouble getting people to come out to stuff. With our regulars, I understand since many of them have personal stuff going on in their lives. But I just don't get it when I get so many emails that say"There are a ton of us from our chapter living in NYC, and we can't wait to come" then.........nothing. And now our AA has dwindled down to so few participants, having personal phone calls go out is a bit impractical, which is sad that there is that little participation. Our latest "plan" is to start having a get-together once per month, same day, same place, same time. We are planning to hold it at an Irish pub, because they serve inexpensive food, and if people can't get there say, right at 6PM, it is still comfortable enough to come later. Any other NYC alum groups, or alum groups in general struggling with these issues? I hate to say it, but as the months go by and the same stuff keeps happening, I am starting to feel as if I just don't want to do it anymore..............I just went to our listserv and we have 102 members on it. Even more than that I am sure get our emails forwarded to them. Would it be appropriate to send out a message to the group voicing the frustrations going on and requesting that people serious about participating and creating a strong alumnae group contact me? At this point I really am ready to throw the towel in..............I don't want to sound rude or bitchy, but I've planned events in the past where a whole bunch of people signed up that they were coming and then were no call/no show. I ended up sitting there by myself until someone showed up and then we waited only for no one else to come....... I think that is just downright rude. I am really looking forward to everyone's thoughts.

It does get very frustrating to say the least.

But, the only thing you can do is keep trying!

Keep planning events and then give a follow up note to remind them.

Do you have a good email listing first off. If a so, keep building on it as much as possible to reach more people.


After events, then give a little note to highlight who was there and what went on. Try to keep it as positive as possible. If some think others are having fun and see names they know, they may opt to come the next time.:)

Good luck and hang in there!

The happy hour idea is a great way to get them to come. We did it for years and had a pretty good turn out.

The problem of "not knowing anyone" is a common one, we see it all the time.

We had a BBQ over the summer at an alum's house with spouses and children welcome and we weren't expecting many people (since it was summer) but we got 11 alumnae plus some husbands and kids so it turned out to be one of our best attended events. And about half of the attendees were new.

It takes patience and perservence, we've been at this for 6 years now and we are only just getting good at it.

What She and all of the above said.

Keep it positive and inexpensive. If many of the Sisters are in town working, what a better way for them to miss the crowd. "Happy Hour"!

We do a a Monthly Meeting and I cannot make them all, but is more Social, but does get into GLO or Chapters problems. So just tailor it as it were and let it run its course in the discussion.:)

Everyone will want to talk about problems in one form or another!

Just keep a positive spin on it and be smiliey Face about it!:)

Re: NYC Alum groups
 

As a VP of the NYC Chi O alumnae chapter, I feel your pain and I will say "NO WAY! DO NOT SEND OUT AN EMAIL LIKE THAT!!!!!" :D Sorry for the yelling, but I think this will really turn people off!

We've come to terms with the fact that NYC is a very transient place. When the women get here, they need to make some connections so they reach out to their alumnae chapter. Maybe they attend an event or two, then they start to meet other people at their job or place of worship, etc and the sorority isn't so necessary anymore. So they come to founders' day and that's about it. It happens, but you can't take it personally.

Also, especially in NYC, interest really wanes in the summer. We don't do anything really - except an occasional book club or happy hour. The fall is always the best turnout time for us - weather is still decent, people are in town and not on vacations, etc. I think your idea of same day/time/location is excellent. I also think follow-up emails when people do attend are great, but also if they don't. Send a quick note saying you were looking forward to meeting them - did they have trouble finding you, etc. Then ask them for ideas of things they would like to do. If they feel involved from the start they might be more interested in attending.

And, just know that some people might not be "into it" as much as you are. I'm sort of a Chi O nut, but most people aren't like that. So if only a handful of women attend and they all have a nice time, then you did something great for the sisterhood and you should be proud of that!

I agree with Kathy. Please don't send that email especially since I am on that listserv. ;)

I wish that I could attend more events, but my eyes are still a problem for me. When I get well, I will definitely return to my previous level of involvement. I think many members are going through their own personal situations right now which explains the lower level of involvement. I agree that having an event at the same place and same evening will give our group the consistency that we need.

When I attended some NYC Panhel meetings, alumnae of quite a few sororities complained of the same things that we're experiencing. I was told that having at least ten women attend an event means that it is a success. Most of our dinners have had about that many attendees.

Maybe more NYC or city alumnae/i can weigh in with some suggestions and advice. :)

Yes, it is.

And it's not a NYC problem. The same thing happens everywhere. We deal with it constantly.

I recently went through and cleaned out our listserv and removed people who had never been to anything (and had been on the list for 3+ years). Then I added women who asked to be kept informaed of what's going on.

Even though you have 102 women on your list, they might not be the RIGHT 102 women. As has been said already, they may not be as interested as others.

Thanks guys. It makes me feel better to see that we are not the only one's going through this. I still have a theory that alumnae attendence is also a reflection of their experience in undergrad, especially new alumnae. I have been hearing that chapters in the NYC area, hell, in NYS in general (and probably elsewhere) are having issues so this may be the trickle down effect right there. Another issue is that many alums are only focused on their individual chapter. I have had alums from my own chapter who live in the area say they would only attend something directly related to our chapter. I have also had people tell me that they don't want to attend something that they are going to be expected to pay $$$$/work with headquarters/etc. Yeah, I agree it probably would not be the best thing to send out an email like that. We always get one or two in the pot though that no matter what we do, or when we do it, they never attend and then bitch about it. I can deal with that. I guess if it is that important to you, you will come check it out sooner or later. How do you guys deal with people who would probably be a wonderful asset, but think it is "juvenile" to attend a sorority event after graduation? Thanks for the input, I like discussions like this :D.

If that's what you've been hearing then tailor the events you have around what they want to do and don't even try for things that they say they don't want.

Have events that don't cost any money to attend.

BUT don't discount those who may have had bad experiences. Just go out of your way to show them that they can also have good experiences. It may take time, but they might come around.

What are some good events to have that cost little to no money? The difficulty we have here is lack of space. It is hard to have a group of women over in a small apartment. Plus many people also have roommates that doesn't make it do-able. A main reason I don't have people over is because some people think it is a trek from Manhattan to Queens although I really don't think so since I live 10 minutes away from Mid-town and 2 blocks from the subway. Oh yeah, and I have pets and some people may be allergic.

I really like doing the Breast Cancer Walk. Some of us did it last year. You put in a donation and get to walk with your sisters/meet new people.

I tried planning a mani/pedi day but no one really signed up (this was awhile ago though).

We met at a Cosi once and had a good response.

We also had a huge turnout and random new people show when we planned a co-ed event with Russ's group (it was him and one of his brother's and I think at one point, there were probably at least 15 of us).

Whenever we have had the get-together's at an Irish pub, there always seems to be a decent response.

I am trying to stay away from the Happy Hour theme because when a few of us recently attended a Volunteer Conference, we learned that we are known as the "Drinking/Partying Alumnae Association". We are SO NOT though which goes to show how rumors fly when using things like a listserv in yahoogroups ;).

Well, the events I was thinking of our happy hours and things like that. And my response to you about the "rumor", at least you're having fun. And if people are showing up, then continue doing it. The only thing that's important is doing what your members want to do. As long as you aren't making fools of yourselves, I don't see what the big deal is. And besides, if a member complains that all you have is happy hour type things well then that's the exact time to solicit ideas from THAT member on what the group should do. Complaints mean little if they aren't going to offer ideas to help.

When my alumnae chapter first formed in 1999, our PAD at that time constantly passed along a negative opinion of events with alcohol at them (even if it was wine at a holiday party). She has since admitted that "those are the events that young people want to go to" and I would think that's even more prevalent in NYC.

I say don't discontinue the happy hour. When we have happy hours, we do them in addition to the regular events.

One event that turned out to be very popular was a day at the horse races. Emerald Downs here only costs $4 to get in and then the money you spend (bets, food, etc) is all up to the individual. Some of the members brought husbands and kids as well.

Pottery painting was good too for us. You just pay the price of whatever piece of pottery you paint.

We have micro-breweries and wineries here as well and we've toured them (no or minimal cost).

We volunteered at a place called Treehouse that helps foster kids. We basically folded clothes and things like that for a few hours on a Saturday.

I have no idea where you are, so this may be totally off the wall, but are there events in Central Park or one of the museums or something that are low cost or free? Those are already planned and you can just tag on. And I am forgetting where this is every year but what about ice skating (when winter comes). I have only been to NYC once (during the summer) but I've always wanted to do that. :D

Granted, they only want to deal with THEIR Chapter, but what about Sisters that are around and need a Sister fix as it were?

:)

We had a big group of new alumnae show up to our September alumnae club meeting last September and they were SO excited to find out that it's not like undergrad was at all! They couldn't believe we didn't have reports and paperwork and all that junk to deal with. It was a huge relief to them. They were also relieved to find out that our dues are only $30 a year! Do they have a clear understanding of what it will be like, or are they afraid that they'll end up doing paperwork and sitting at long business meetings?

Perhaps you could ask for volunteers on the list serv to be responsible for planning one meeting. That way, they feel more empowered and like they own it rather than being told what will be happening. Our May meeting always consists of brainstorming the next year's calendar (over a potluck dinner and lots of desserts!) We identify a hostess and a co-hostess for each meeting so that everybody knows in advance who is planning what.

Given that we have 9 Alpha Gam chapters in Michigan and get women from out of state too, and have over 1000 alumnae in the metro Detroit area, we consider a turn out of 10 women pretty good. There are a few other alumnae chapters/clubs in the metro Detroit area too. The 10 women who show up vary each month also. You may have 2 or 3 who make almost every meeting and the other 7 vary. It gets even harder when there are spouses and kids to work around so sisters who thought they would be there can't always make it if the baby is sick or hubby has to work late, etc.

Dee

maybe you are having too many events. if you are trying to do more than one thing per month, then that might be too much. maybe even one event is too much for your group.

have you tried meeting at a museaum? have you polled the group lately about things they would like to do? do you send out recaps after each event? if people know how much fun they are missing then they will be more likely to come next time. even if there were only a few people you can talk it up. tell something funny that happened to the group, etc. send pics with everyone who attended.

we have the same issue here. we have many more lurkers on our list than we have people who attend events. personally, i am glad that being in an alumnae group is so flexible. it is great to know that if i can't make a few events in a row, people won't give me a hard time!

You know why Happy Hours work - because people feel comfortable strolling in and out as they please. As opposed to a set "meeting" where you are expected at a certain time.

We do bowling events - we did Bowlmor once but found the alley at the Port Autority is cheaper. ALso, this week we are doing "Martinis and Manicures". For $10 at Beauty Bar (231 E. 14th Btwn 2nd&3rd) you get a manicure and a martini. We have 25 people signed up to attend!!!

Also, Book Club is a good, free event. We have a point person who sends out an email saying "Then next book is ____ and we'll meet towards the end of October. If you'd like to attend or host the event, please email me at ______" Then if no one can host, the point person picks the date and a location - like DTUT.

Another thing is to poll your members on not only what they are interested in, but what they might like to contribute. We have a spot on our membership form for occupation. When we started talking about a finance semincar we remembered one of our members is an investment advisor. We emailed her - she rarely comes to any other events - and she happily said she would do it no charge. We're using the Yorkvillle library - the libraries that have meeting rooms usually rent them for cheap - I think we are paying $45 which came from the budget so no cost to the members.

Hope this gives you some ideas!!

These are great ideas ladies! I am starting a new less stressful job next week, which is also located in Manhattan, so hopefully I will have more time to devote to planning. I like the idea for the Manicures and Martini's. Have you city girls found a good day that tends to attract people? I am thinking of doing it on a Tuesday. I figured, Monday is hectic with being back to work, and lots of people have classes on Wed & Thurs. A lot of us plan random stuff on the weekends too that is not necessarily sorority-related (like b-days) and people come to that kind of stuff also. I also wanted to tell you guys about an event I had that totally bombed. Stay away from theme restaurants! I thought it would be fun to go to Lucky Cheng's. Well, this is one particular event that a bunch of people signed up as "yes" and then never showed. It ended up being only three of us, and it was kind of uncomfortable and awkward being put on the spot like that and having to get up on stage with such a small group. Afterwards, one of my sister's shared that she had spoken with a couple of other alums who said they didn't go because they had been there before for bachelorette parties and once was enough. I would also be interested in networking with the other alumnae groups in the city. I have been meaning to get to a NYC Panhel event for the longest, but the fact that I haven't I guess is proof right there of what you are all saying about life getting in the way!

I'm going to echo what the other ladies have said here in my comments.

We hand out a survey at our first Fall event, held in mid-Sept, which asks what events ladies are interested in. Tho we have a full calendar of events planned before this event, some are more specific than others so it's helpful to see what ppl would be interested in.

We usually plan just one event a month, on a different day of the week for each event. Happy hours are good ideas for the reasons Kathy suggested, people don't feel like they have to come on time or will be stuck there for a long time either. We've done dessert nites, book clubs, pottery painting, and are tryig to expand our volunteering events as well. Our co-ed events are well attended by both us & the fraternity too, and are pretty fun as well. Some people want a formal meeting so we usually have that in the general purpose room of someone's office/apt building. Events where we work with the local collegiate chapter , during recruitment, new member meetings, etc, are highly attended as well, and we have to go to Jersey!

This year we made our dues slightly lower for returning members & recent grads too...and had cute party favors at our fall event too!

I just met a lady yesterday at Race for the Cure who's a Zeta and had lived in NYC. She spoke about how membership & interest goes in cycles for alumnae groups...I think she's very right! We seem to have a core group after a good year plus of building the group back up.

How often do you guys have E-board meetings and that kind of thing? How do you gain structure with such a small group of women? I am finding that several people have these big ideas, but we just are not there yet. Especially because several of our regulars have been faced with serious events lately (ie. Peaches, CyberDPhiE). I don't want to step on anyone's toes, but in order for these things to happen, even as simple as sending out a card to acknowledge the death of a sister's family member, there needs to be organization. We don't even have a bank account opened yet. I get frustrated because I get emails like this from "members" of the group saying more or less why aren't these things done, but then no one is coming together as a group to address these things (especially the ones wondering why they aren't done). Does that make sense? I also don't think it is fair that a couple people have to take on all the responsibility. Do you guys have these same kind of issues with your groups? I swear, sometimes I feel like I am still in college when this stuff comes up!

don't try to do big thigns
 

Have you tried coordinating interest groups? Any idea the ages/background of these individuals?

Our local alumnae organization has 225 active no-kidding members at the moment; and ironically it is because we are very decentralized. We have 14 active interest groups and this is where 96% of our membership comes from. We have a day and evening book club (evening is mostly working women/women with kids, day is mostly retirees, some stay-at home moms); we have a day and evening bridge group, a needlepoint group, a happy hour group, a wine-tasting group, a runners group, a moms and tots playgroup, and a few "zip code" groups - groups of people that meet to do random gatherings based on area. Most of these groups have 20-30 people on the list, and any given meeting is 8-12 of them getting together once a month. This solves the get-to-know people problem - once these core groups get established it is very easy to connect because now you are not trying to get to know 200 people, you are connecting to 20-30 people.

We have 4 "big" events a year (they are fairly well attended - 50-60 people) but otherwise all events are done on a small scale. There is no obligation to attend any given event, and participation in an interst group does not require the person to attend other functions. Each interest group has a "chair" that organizes meetings, and we do have an executive board - but otherwise it is a very low-key approach.

As these eager members email you - suck them in. Have them be the chair for one of your groups.

Hi Paula. I think one of our major issues, as was pointed out by one of the other NYC women that posted, is that NYC is such a transient, and busy city. I get interest emails quite often, but no one really willing to take that extra step to make a committment. We also do not have OLDER alumnae. I would say honestly that all the women who express interest are in their 20's and 30's tops. A long time ago I got a couple of women who actually took themselves off our list because as they put it "They don't do happy hour and we are too young for them". I would love it if I had more people that were older expressing their interest but they don't. I have tried to have interest meetings in the past specifically geared to new people, but no one shows. I can still keep trying, but it does get discouraging after awhile planning all these events and no one shows. I am not discounting the regulars who do by any means. That's another thing too that I think hurts us. As I mentioned, we have had some serious things happen with the regulars. So when we don't have them, unfortunately, the group gets even smaller and smaller to the point where it is almost like "What group?".............

We had those issues for a LONG time. For the first couple of years of our existence, our chapter was run by myself and our Treasurer (the MOST important position in a chapter). Both of us were of the opinion that if someone complained that such and such should be happening, then it was time to tell that person to step up and do it. Usually, they shut up. You can only do so much so just prioritize what you want to do and complete the things as you get women to help.

I like the phrase "that's a great idea but we just don't have anyone to head it up, would you like to?"

It does get easier and you will eventually get a good base of people attending and helping out with things. It took us about 4 years before we had a good core.

And..........most of our members are in their 20's and 30's. It can be done. If that's your age group, then play to that group. It might sound bad, but don't worry about the older women. Start with what you do best and go from there.

I agree with Paula, as women email you get them to help.

OOOOOoooooooo that's a great line. I definately plan on using it. It's an interesting observation as well that I will send multiple emails out to the person that has these ideas and I don't hear anything, or I hear a negative response. As soon as I plan something though, they jump in with all these ideas, or more negative reaction to them. I guess until we get a bigger group of people that are actively planning things, I am not going to worry about it. Yeah, I see your point about the treasurer. We definately need to get that into place. That is my main goal for the next few months.

Our re-organization in '03 happened this way. There was the past pres who was pretty much the only carry over from the last EC and 6? of us new gals who wanted to do something. Depending on the time we could commit, we almost chose positions on EC ourselves. Since then we have had ppl move away from NYC & new ppl have filled the positions in more formal elections. And as a whole our EC is very different women, different collegiate chapters, personalities, jobs, which helps bring different ideas & opinions to planning. That original EC from '03 came to be bc we spoke up & said we were interested in helping somehow and the old Pres took us up on our offer ASAP.

I realize you have a few 'regulars' who have some things going on right now but that's why you need a Treasurer, a Secretary, a Service Chair, etc. If you don't delegate tasks & planning it will always be just you & you'll get frustrated. Consistency is key. People aren't going to like every event & they'll tell you so but it seems with us that as long as there's one event per month, we get a core group of women coming out. This tho is after 2years of working at it.

I think the biggest things to understand are:

1) You won't please everyone. Worry about those people who actually come to the events, do what they want.

2) Those who complain need to be offering to help. For our chapter, a lot of those complaining were (are still) women who are not even dues paying members and sorry, but their opinion doesn't matter AT ALL.

3) It takes TIME. Years to be exact, not weeks or months.

4) Get as many people involved as possible. Even if it's just planning one event.

5) You aren't unique, apathy is very common among alumnae.

Hold a variety of events that appeal to various women in various stages of life.

Set up interest groups-- dinner club, book club, knitting circle, mom's club, Young Alum group

Don't overprogram!

Try to do some chapter support. Working with a chapter or planning a social together appeals to a wide range. Also if there is a local chapter, try to host a yearly event with their new members to plant that "alum involvement" seed in their heads-- they are your new members in 4 years, potentially!

Hold events at different times. After work, mid morning, weekends, etc.

Send out a quarterly newsletter as well as setting up a Yahoo! group.

Ask for input and engage your members

Have a welcome packet for new members to your assoc and someone to call them and invite them out for coffee. One on one is sometimes less intimidating.

Utilize your national officers who work with alumnae for ideas

Get the names of women in your area from HQ within a 50 mile radius of your location and do a yearly mass mailing. You will pick up lost members this way. This effort revitalized my Orlando Alum group and now it is thriving! Despite there being tons of alum and a strong collegiate chapter in the area, we could just never get it together... that mailing made all the difference and we set an event around it-- Founder's Day.

Contact the area APH and hold some socials with other alum groups.

Include non members, spouses, sig others, and kids for some of your events! "BYOB"-- Bring your own buddy!

Most alum go their own way because there's really nothing to hold them to a committment. As others have stated, don't worry about alum apathy. Just work with those who are interested.

I think you are doing a tremendous job - it is hard and exhausing to always be the cheerleader/organizer/recruiter when it feels like no one else cares. I've been in that boat before - it sucks it sucks it sucks and then all of a sudden things start clicking and it takes off.

I'm going to add to my comment and say the best way to get people involved is to ask them directly; face-to-face if possible. (email is too easy to ignore)

I read somewhere once that if you ask for volunteers and send to many people on email; you will get few responses because of the "bystander" issue - everyone will assume that someone ELSE will step in to help. However; if you ask personally the individual will rarely say no. (Of course this is sort of blackmail :-) )

I hear you on the trancience. I live in the DC area, and we have a revolving door of members. We have a fairly large organization and a fairly large board and we still struggle - we have 2-3 board members move out of town yearly it seems (we're already on our third treasurer this year) - just the nature of the city. which is why the small group approach has worked well for us - the groups self-sustain, even through membership turns over. Other than that there is not much you can do about it - just go with the flow I guess :-)

I moved to Boston and became co-President of our AC almost immediately. The chapter had been huge a few years back, but now we'd get maybe 2 or 3 sisters showing up to events besides us. So what I decided to do was concentrate on what interested me. I don't know what women with children want to do or our older membership, so I didn't deal with it. If someone had a problem with our programming, they could help out I figured. Two years later we now have 20 sisters coming to our Founder's Day event this Sunday. I had to rent out a room because the restaurant can't handle that many people in one party! And we now have 4 women on our exec board, which is so much help, especially since I don't have to be president.

So, I say stick to what you know, the things you want to do, and it'll all work out in the end. And if it doesn't, since the programming interests you, you'll still have a good time with whatever you are doing! Good luck with everything, your sorority is very lucky to have you!

Re: don't try to do big thigns
 

I think PaulaKKG and I are in the alumnae association. It is an excellent resource. I am involved with 2 of the interest groups that she mentioned.

Even smaller alumnae associations have a lot to offer as well. I have relocated several times to hubby's work and have always found the association to be nothing but welcoming and inclusive.