I am being Harassed...HELP!!
 

Not to get too detailed but I am being harassed by someone who feels the need to make my life miserable. I don't know why. I have suspicion as to who it might be but I can't prove anything. I have been receiving phone calls, e-mails, and text messages from this person for about a month. At first they upset me and now I just want them to stop. The phone calls I have the phone company working on. The e-mails are coming from an account of mine that I haven't had for about 5 years (Or at least the return address says so) and the text messages appear to be coming from the AT&T wireless website.

Is there anyway I can track this or am I just destined to have to change my phone number? ATTWS is not helping; I have called them multiple times. I also would prefer to not get my IT department involved but will as a last resort.
Thanks

If you want to get definitive answers to where the e-mails and wireless messages are coming from, you'll need to go to the police and make a complaint. Considering how harassed you are feeling, this may not be a bad option.

How scary for you!!

You can try the webpage WHOIS which will provide you all the IP information and you can go to http://www.abuse.net/index.phtml to report the internet abuse. I would also recommend you contact the police, who may have more information about your rights and how to track down the user...

If you can locate the IP address, then you can go back to the user's domain and inform them of the harrassment and ask to have it stopped...save all the emails...don't delete them, in case you need evidence to anyone who requests it...

I wich you the best of luck...if you know who it is (or reasonable suspicion), it might be another reason to contact the police...

Do you know who it is?

If so, get a VPO.

You don't really need a lawyer for it. I'm not 100% sure who to contact, maybe the police or DHS (either one could probably direct you on where to go).

There may be some kind of filing fee for the VPO, but it sounds like it'd be worth it. If your fella violates it, he can land his ass in jail.

But wait -- if the cops are already working on the phone calls, won't they know soon anyway?

I say document, document, document. Then FILE A COMPLAINT even if everything stops when the cops confront the guy. Because if he did it to you he'll do it to someone else, and if he has a record of it, she'll have more options than you do.

I said it before, I'll say it again. Make a date in VPO court. You'll be glad you did :D

What is a VPO?

I have contacted the Police. I got the royal brush off of "Is this person causing physical harm" when I said no I got this feeling that they tuned me out. I have had to deal with the police in this area a couple of other times and they are not very helpful. I have SBC trying to trace some of the phone calls but since we have a rerouted phone number it has become a much harder issue to deal with.

Thanks for the advice everyone. By the way if it is who I think it is, it in't a man.

I have no idea which state you're in but there are cyberstalking laws on the books in several states. As for the cops ignoring your pleas, I'd ask to speak to someone higher up to complain about their treatment of you..As a taxpayer, you should demand you're right to be protected by them. They can't pick and choose who to help.

Well the next time (if you speak to them) get on the phone with an AT&T rep and demand to speak to a supervisor. Everytime they transfer you, ask the person if they are a supervisor until you actually reach one. Then, get his/her full name and explain that you will be filing a complaint in court against their company for contributing to the negligent infliction of emotional distress on you. See how fast they respond to your inquiries.

Go back to the police station and speak to a sergeant. Have them take a written statement of what's been going on so they can't say later they never knew you were being harassed. Unfortunately, unless this person is making any threats to you, there is really nothing much the police can do. Without knowing the identity of the person, you're stuck with a problem. Get AT&T to trace those calls...


RUgreek

Because of many things that have evolved, this can be construed as terroristic threats and becomes Federal which is a felony.

Do not let the Local COPS tell you they cannot do anything!:mad:

"You"

tell them you want a Police Report made out and you want the complaint # and a copy of the report. If they are in a place where they cannot make a copy, they must give you the Complaint #. It may cost you some $ but you have it in your hands for further investigation.

if you have a recorder and anything is said, keep a copy of it.

It doesnt have to be just a He She, it can be any combo of things.

RUGreek is right, if your local phone company does not keep a record after you have requested it, they are in violation of Federal Law. You tell the local Tele person I want a Supervisor right now. Point it out to them, they are required to do it I beleive up to three days.

With email, sometimes the headers can give you a lot of information. It's very easy to fake a "from" address, but harder (though not impossible) to fake the headers. If the headers indicate that the mail really was coming from that account, could you contact the ISP for that account and talk with them about what's going on?

A VPO is a "Victims Protection Order". It can be obtained from a judge. Here in Oklahoma, they have special VPO court days where people just show up and obtain VPO's against abusive spouses, people who are stalking them, etc. It's mostly to protect from domestic violence, but can be used any time you think someone poses a serious threat to you.

Call your local DHS or police station and ask about it. Or even better, if you have an attorney-friend, ask them how to obtain one. Since you're in Cali, I couldn't really tell you how this would be done.

VPO's vary in their effect. Most of the time, they just forbid the other person to be within any kind of close proximity to the other and usually, they forbid communication. Violation of a VPO can result (and often does result) in jail time.

Thanks everyone! One more question..
Does it matter that this person isn't threatening me in anyway shape or form? They are basically telling me, giving me information about someone in my life that I am already aware of. If it is who I think it is, I think she is just trying to hurt my feelings and make me mad.

Thanks Again

It's still harassment and a type of stalking that you shouldn't have to be subjected to....I'd continue with the suggestions you received...

good luck!

Maybe a restraining order?

Laws vary a lot from state to state on this. As I said before, if you have a friend with a law degree, you might go ask them what you can do here.

Apparently this person's actions bothered you enough to post a thread here with the title, "I am being Harassed...HELP!!".

It doesn't matter if the person is sending you repeated e-mails saying "Hot dogs are great!" Harassment is harssment whether it is extremely vulgar or mildly irritating. No one has the right to subject you to unwanted and repeated communications.

Does this person's actions bother you? Do they make you feel uncomfortable or uneasy? If the answer is yes, then you have a right to proceed with an order of protection and/or police involvement.

.....Kelly :)

Hahaha. Hot dogs are great.

when she emails you, reply back and say you are saving all of her messages and are filing a formal complaint. if that doesn't stop her, FILE IT.

Kelly- "HER" actions don't necessarily make me feel uncomfortable or uneasy. It is just irritating. Yes I feel I am being harrassed but my definintion of harrassment and police departments are obviously different. I say harrassed because "she " won't stop, even though I have made comments and so has my husband about calling the police and also hiring a PI to find out what is going on. I called the courts about a restraining order and since I have NO proof whom it is I can't file. It will never stand up in court. I also contacted the police again and also had my husband call and I can file a complaint in general but not against a person because I don't have proof. The phone company is helping a bit more now but since "she" hasn't called lately I have nothing for them to track.
Lately, "she" has only been text messaging my phone from ATTWS site so I don't have a number whom it is from. I called ATTWS to see if they can track anything and I am getting the run around with them also. NO WONDER, people just give up and let these things happen.

I would get a new phone # and make it unlisted. Then I would contact the email provider and tell them to disable the account that the emails are coming from and tell them why. I totally understand where you are coming from, but I understand what the police are saying also. Just try and make it so contacting you through your cell and email (maybe get yourself a new email address also) are almost impossible-- this person obviously needs help!

ETA: I know it sucks to have to make changes like that-- but you gotta do, what you gotta do to make this stop!

If you like lips and assholes :D

If she's just irritating you, but doesn't seem to be a threat, is it possible to ignore her, or at least avoid giving her the kind of reaction she seems to be seeking? I'm guessing that the text messaging/forged email stuff isn't going to be very rewarding (since she doesn't get to experience your reaction), so she might either move on to something else or drop it. Is it legal for you to record the calls if there are any more? I believe that it varies from state to state.

For cyberstalking, there is an excellent group that can provide you with tips and advice:

www.cyberangels.com

This site has advice (it's from the UK, but still applies)

http://www.thesite.org/youthnet/jsp/...p?d=171&a=2085

Keep copies and a record (as well as a diary with dates and times) of EVERYTHING! Don't respond with fear as that's what the individual is hoping to get from you. Tell them simply to stop.

Stalking IS a crime. Insist on fiing a police report so you can start a paper trail. If the local police won't help you, go to your county sheriff or state police. You can also go to the FBI if there are threats.

You might want to consider taking a martial arts course. It's very empowering.