Boyfriend obligations
 

Let me ask you something - just because the guy is your man now, doe that mean you should have sex everytime you see each other? They think you are obligated to have sex with them cuz they are your man now. Whenever my man tries that shit with me - i put him on no sex probation - he can just use his hand and lotion. I wonder if husbands try this same thing.

You shouldn't ever be obligated to have sex. Ever. And if that appears to be all the guy is coming over for, then I suggest get out NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

nope you are obligated to put out its written in the constitution's fine print.


i am kidding you are in control of that and you know it. And if thats all he is after you should send him packing.

I've been in that situation before.

It's not fun.

If you are in that situation, get out now. It won't go anywhere healthy.

Obligated! Right....

Any guy who even thinks that should be cut off ..... for at least a month! Like you said, they've got their lotion and tissues and you should only do what you wanna do!

Well, instead of "feeling obligated" shouldn't you want to anyway? :confused:

Forget probation-- it sounds like you need to drop his ass. Now, if you only saw each other once every three weeks, I could see where he might be feeling the need every time he sees you. :p But there's still no reason to feel obligated to do anything you both don't want to.

[After marriage? Same thing. (Sheesh, I'd think most people would get sore-- I mean, if you see each other every morning and every evening and all day on weekends.. that's a lot of hooking up!)]

Seriously. If the guy wants toi have sex a lot and you want to have sex drastically less, there is a problem. He will need something extra on the side :)

I had this problem with my ex-fiance. I felt obligated after a while, and it eventually killed all sexual desire I had for him whatsoever. Definitely bail... NOW.

No one (men or women) wants sex all the time. Sometimes you don't want to do it, and that is OK! Anyone that you are with who can't get over themselves enough to undestand that you don't always want to have sex needs a big reality check. That being said, men get really wierd when you aren't horny for extended peroids of time (like a week). It's like cosmic disorder to them. Somehow your stress (or other reason you aren't horny in the first place), becomes a personal thing you must have against them. Can you tell my ex never understood when I was having a hard time at school or work? He'd just say that more educated people have less sex. Go marry a high school dropout!

Uhm, speak for your own gender. :p

I would say that we (boys) don't exactly want sex all the time . . . more that we are poised on the verge of having sex every second of every day, we just need a partner.

ETA: An eternal state of readiness.

And if you expect us to stay loyal, we should have a reasonable expectation that are needs are being meant physically. Thats a major part of a romantic relationship after all.

Re: Boyfriend obligations
 

Gwirlfriend... Do you want to keep this man? If you don't, then do what everyone else here is telling you and drop his ass...

But if you do want to keep this man, then, well, sweetheart, your performance ain't up to snuff... Basically, you ain't layin' IT on him to tire his ass owt... He has to KNOW that if he's dealing with you then he's gonna havta be pullin' an all nighter (sookie-sookie, naw) with deep drilling for new (Kama Sutra) positions...

Besides, he's probably leaving the room and you are feeling robbed and abandoned of affection...

Hey, if you don't want to give it up, just 'cuz you want to keep your wits about yourself, then lay limp and he might give up...

But, probably since both of y'all are youngin's and can actually go all night looonnnngggg, then, you may want to do some "slow motion" with him... One idea is called the "Sets of Nine"... Kinna like a "reps"... Takes some concentration... But, it will keep the sticky spunk in him longer and keep him "stronger"... It works like this, "One deep, 9 short"... "2 deep, 8 short"... "3 deep, 7 short"... Dumbassed boys are incapable of getting to "9 deep, 1 short"...

Also, practice top motions with him. Such as the "spin moves" in quarter turns with some agitation... For some reason, it works wonders... He might slow his roll then...

Margot Anand's books are rather interesting as well as Tantra.com...

These kinds of things should affect ALL the senses... Sight, sound, touch, smell and taste...

Think about it... Practice makes perfect...

And yeah, my husband tried that chit when we first married, then I did some spin moves on his ass, he had to lock me outta the bathroom!!! :eek: ;) :D

Re: Re: Boyfriend obligations
 

CTHU . . Nicely said AKA_Monet.

If your man is fed and sexually exhausted he is not going anywhere.

Yeah, if you feel obligated, then the priorities of the relationship itself are all messed up. Relationships should have nothing to do with an "obligation" to have sex. It's just not about that.

LOL - I should explain more - we dont see each other that much but we both live with family so acess to a place to have sex is difficult unless his family goes on a trip for a weekend ;) Nah I prefer to give out a little (taste) for marriage then after marriage his ass will be sore LOL....... I believe if you just give it to a man whenever wherever you will just be a sex object or a booty call. It is a phenomen - whenever you withhold sex the guys want to get married and make a honest woman out of you so to speak lol.......... if girls want to get married here is my advice - say no to sex until then :) lol ;)


Joking..............................or am i? :p

Quote for the day:

"When you are not doing your man, someone else is."

Re: Re: Boyfriend obligations
 

THIS IS THE BEST POST EVER.

I think it's complete bs that men think women have to step up to their sexual overdirve to "keep them faithful". It's a moral decision to cheat or not to cheat, and it's a piss-poor excuse to say your girlfriend or wife drove you to cheat by not having sex with you everyday. Take responsibility for your own actions.

Sweetheart, you are exactly correct in that statement. You ought not have to up the drive if you ain't that type for loose man. Because no matter how wild and loose a woman is, a man will still cheat on her.

And, if he's coming home, day after day, knocking down the door to get some with you know what doing the knocking and you ain't givin' it to him to "rock his world", then believe me, he will find a way to relieve that "tension"... It may not be cheating on you physically, but, the tension does have to be released, just like his brains get all oozed out...

The fact is, with the Tantra, his performance has be upgraded... Because he cain't be no "one minute man", that's just a dayum waste of time to a woman who knows her errogenous zones and chakras points...

And most women who want an orgasm--multiple if possible--have to build up at long time to get to that level... It doesn't matter, it takes time on female anatomy--just how a woman's built. So pullin' in and out too fast is not gonna get a woman very happy anywhere. That's only if the man ain't into bangin' and bustin'... If he is, then he can go find a hole in a fence...

It's not a purely moral argument - if a woman feels that she's not being given enough attention in a relationship, then you'd be perfectly willing to allow her to go elsewhere for that, no?

Sex is a NEED in a relationship - not physical intercourse necessarily, but sexual/intimate contact. If you're not down for meeting each others' needs - and COMPROMISING if your needs are 'lower' than his - then he's perfectly apt to get his needs met elsewhere.

Now, should he break up and find it then? sure - but if he's cheating for that reason, then you'll need to be able to see the causation.

Simply put - if you want to be frigid, find a dude who can deal with that, or you're in for some noise. Sorry, but it's a compatibility issue, just like hating the Yankees or living an active social life.