What is the hardest thing.....
 

What is the hardest thing you have experienced as a result of being in a sorority or frternity? Is it the time committment, attention to detail needed to get things done, inspiring the troops, recruiting decent members, retaining decent members, organizaing philanthropy, organizing paper work and deadlines (MY personal problem!!!), staying positive, reputations, what???

I need to feel I am not alone here!:)

It's challenging to be a new member and learn about your sisterhood while keeping a Dean's List GPA, but it can be done. Just takes a little commitment and time management, that's all. :)

Paying dues on time. :(

The biggest problem I had was working full time, going to school full time, & finding time for my sisters.

Balancing 12 hours a week of work, 16 credits of classes, 3 days a week of karate, vice president stuff with japanese club, church during the middle of the week, and finding time for the non-greek friends and boyfriend...

And I chose to rush knowing I was doing all that? Yup.

Busy, busy, busy, but I loved every moment of it.

I've got another busy looking schedule awaiting me this fall too, but I'm looking forward to it.

I'd say overlooking the negativity and drama that can sometimes occur, particularly being on Exec. I'm a pretty negative, dramatic person, so I think I suffer even more than others. But it always comes and goes in waves- sometimes I have to work pretty hard to see all the good, and other times it just feels like everything is great.

paying bills. Definately.

when my mom got sick, my grades slipped, and I got sick....

all I can say is, I have the most patient sorority sisters EVER.

I think back in the day it was all the hazing, alcohol, drugs and sex.

-Rudey

Getting people to pay their dues. I had to suspend all reimbursements and put half the chapter on financial suspension once. Being VP-Finance often makes you the heavy. :( As a result, I had a rule where I would only discuss financials for an hour after chapter each week. If I hadn't done that, it would have taken over my life.

No question, learning to juggle was the hardest part of being a collegiate member. Class + work+ sorority+ studying = not much spare time!

But, I'll tell ya. It definitely forced me to become very organized and I've managed to keep that to this day.

I would say my very first semester in my sorority was the hardest...having to balance 20+ hours of work a week, 4 classes, new member education, all the activities to get to know people, and deal with a boyfriend (I actually ended up dumping him the nite of initiation cuz I couldn't deal with his negative attitude anymore) who could not possibly understand why I joined a sorority was all very hard. But, I got through it and am now very happy!

AZSigKap

I'd agree with that. But for me that was the ONLY hard thing. But a big part of the reason I joined a sorority was because I needed to learn how to deal with women, and I've learned that when you get that much estrogen in one place, drama is bound to happen.

If anything, dealing with TEH DRAMA gave me a better attitude because I couldn't let it get me down.

It's tough to put my finger on just one thing. Being a part of any organization is a challenge.

When I was a rho chi, I had to explain to my new (non-greek) boyfriend that I had to pretty much disappear for a week for rush because I had to be available for my PNMs and "on duty" during parties. He didn't quite get that just because I wasn't squirreled away in a rush room didn't mean that I could hang out with him any time.

It was also tough deaffiliating and being unable to speak to any of my sisters or any non-freshman women on my dorm's floor (pretty much all the women on my floor were in sororities).

The year after I graduated, I came back to help with rush, and was treated very badly by some of the actives. I didn't have anything to do with my chapter, or AEPhi at all, for some years afterwards.

Probably the toughest thing of all was watching my chapter go through a reorganization. I was an alum, but I was still around for grad school. Some of my dearest sisters were asked to take early alum status; others deaffiliated outright (by their choice). My little was among them. :( The chapter is stronger now than it was then, but it was still painful to watch. :(

Dues! ESPECIALLY when you move from undergrad to grad/alumni chapters!

Imperial1

Interesting... so your grad/alumnae dues are more? Sorry if that's a nosy question. It is the complete opposite for my sorority (and most NPC sororities, I'd assume).

Yeah graduate dues are a LOT more than undergraduate dues. I guess they assume that once we get our fancy degrees we have more money.:mad:

Very interesting. Would you say that the dues being more has any sort of effect on the number of members who choose to be active in grad chapters? I would think, in my sorority, that high alumnae dues would decrease the number of active alumnae, but from what I know of NPHC, it is pretty much expected that you will join a grad chapter and be active.

Well, my sorority decreases dues for a year after graduation. But after that you are on your own.

Thanks for the info, and sorry for the hijack...

My hardest thing is the time it takes to maintain the sorority, keep deadlines and make sure noone is at each other's throat. :)

Just kidding. Normally, the hardest thing is doing what another person forgot to do...a couple of hours before deadline.

It always feels like the hardest 3 hour class and its lab.

There were a lot of hard things...
Balancing everything of course was difficult, but I agree, I loved every minute of the madness.

Also finding a good balance between my greek and non-greek friends. None of my roommates were greek and most of the guys I dated weren't either (including my current boyfriend of 2 years). Sometimes they wouldn't be so understanding, especially right before recruitment when I couldn't go out because of dirty rushing rules and stuff like that.

It was also very hard being the recruitment chair because you have to explain so many things to your chapter and you have so many people who get their feelings hurt and stuff. You are torn between pan rules, your sisters, national requirements, etc. And there are so many things that can never be discussed due to liability issues (which is great), but its so hard when people pressure you to know why their friend got released (as if it was all my fault). But it was an experience I wouldn't change for the world. (I also had to give up being an Orientation Assitant to be the recruitment chair, which really sucked because I love orientation, but i had done it for 2 years so I thought I needed to do this for adpi)

Being the rush chair and trying to get 45 women psyched for work week, and then 1 1/2 weeks of formal recruitment. But as with most things, sisters went in saying how sucky it would be, and in the end, they were sooooo happy with the results of recruitment. :)

Amen, shadokat and PennyCarter...i think that this year is going to be the hardest because of the VP Recruitment thing...and it's always so hard to balance everything that you WANT to do, not just have to do...particularly the fact that sorority stuff most often conflicts with another major student activity that is my other love in life, it's so hard to run back and forth from meetings every day, or even worse, choose between them...i almost feel like i'm not getting the most out of my college experience by being torn, but i know that i wouldn't be happy if i chose greek stuff over it and vice versa :(

Frankly, for me it's the negativity. When activities are done, it should NOT be an obligation. All girls should be happy to attend & participate. I've seen girls come to something unhappy & just bitching about everything. If you're gonna have that attitude, stay home. I understand legitimate excuses but I've heard things like, "I'd rather be with my boyfriend right now", "How long do we have to stay?", etc.

Ditto. It's even more difficult for me now as an adivser. You only have those few short years as an undergrad and once those are over, that's it. You can't ever go back to it; anything you missed out on then is gone for good.

And realizing that not everyone is as gung-ho about my chapter and Greek Life as I am and that's okay. I can only do as much as my capabilities will allow, the rest is up to them

Yeah, but then no one actually shows up ever, even to optional stuff! We had some great social events planned that no one came to because everyone had a homework/studying thing! And i'm not talking about crappy stuff - these were free yoga classes, Superbowl parties and other FREE occasions...and then the chapter complain that we don't have enough social events. i wanna be like "well, you should come to the ones that we have!!!" i could absolutely die.

The hardest thing I went through as an undergrad was enduring another organization specifically going co-ed to eliminate my chapter. It literally dominated my chapter's existence for the whole of my active years as we struggled to adjust and survive.

And they did eliminate it-- but two years later (after I graduated), it came back.

~ Mel.

The hardest thing for me when I was an undergrad was trying to balance everything. I worked 2 jobs, took b/w 12-16 hours, volunteer work (besides Ronald McDonald House), and held offices w/in my sorority. It was difficult, but it took developing great time management skills. Although it was tough balancing it all, it helped me to be who I am today.

Dealing with petty drama and people that are easily influenced by a couple of negative members in the group is what stands out in my mind from my undergrad day. Drama always exists when you put that many women with different personalities together. Also the crap that used to always happen with other orgs because someone in my org was supposedly messing around with someone from the other orgs boyfriend or vice versa. So many Greeks hated each other back then cuz they jumped on the bandwagon "supporting their sister" (or brother, happened with the frats too) over a rumor that it made Greek life unbearable sometimes.

The hardest things for me were having parents that didn't really understand why I went Greek, and a mother who didn't really care in the least. I agree with PennyCarter, balancing the greek/non-greek friends was slightly difficult at times as well. I learned very quickly though how to time manage efficiently and still have a good time (especially with a full course load/ job/ high position in another prominent organization/ community choir/ boyfriend/etc.)

The hardest thing was striving to make our chapter grow. It was so hard because with only 6 or 7 actives, how do you recruit when the other GLO has 20+? Girls went with the other chapter. :( We worked really hard though and now we boast about 20 actives, but it was soooo hard along the way.

This goes for any org... but if you put 52 girls in a room together, NO ONE will agree on anything unless there is much debate, complaining, and drama. For some, change was hard, especially with the older members. When you have half the house wanting change for the better and the others thinking things are fine, it's hard to convince the older members that it's not the way it used to be and we need to adjust.

I didn't have much of an issue with trying to get things done AND participate in everything possible. Still had great grades though.

Another thing that I am noticing now as an alum is that there is huge heirarchy difference in the house. People without committee heads or on exec almost feel intimidated by those in power. It's so lame because we are all equal on some level but un-positioned girls feel like they don't have a say.

The hardest thing for me was the pressure I felt from members of my family that wanted me to give their GLOs special consideration. It wasn't like they were mean about it, I just felt like I would end up hurting someones feelings. So I ended picking my own path and going DG;)

Time commitment was a big one. As President, it was trying to balance the interests of everyone and make decisions that would ultimately be best for the chapter.

So many things go into helping start up a chapter. I couldn't even begin to decide. Probably the hardest thing I did was being treasurer. I didn't want it, I didn't like being it, I just realized that I was the only one that could do a good job. I did a good job and now they make me the chapter advisor on financial matters after graduation..

What's the moral of the story kids? Never do a good job at something you don't enjoy :D

But it's okay now, I don't have to do anything besides tell people what a good (or bad) job they're doing and how they can do it better. I have no plans to help collect past-due dues in the near future.

I dont know how many of you have gone through a rally rough year, but we did last year and I almoste considered dropping out. It is really tough when your houses are university owned and everyone in the off-campus party houses drop out and it seems like you have no fun and its just work. Luckily I have more character than to quit something I put soo much time into. But If your chapter ever goes through a bad year, you will know what im talking about.

When I was in my local sorority the whole experience of being active was tough. I felt as though I was the only person doing anything (you all can see the thread I had here.)

However, FGP taught me how to be unselfish. Ironically, it was my selfishness that brought me to the sisterhood and to my sisters I am eternally greatful.

Leaving my boys, the school and the chapter to serve the country, and go to war....

No regrets just hard to do..

Youll never meet a better man, then a PIKE

The hardest thing for me is getting sterotyped.... a lot of people think that most greeks are spoiled rich kids, party animals, and very permiscuious (sp???).. and in my opinion that is the farthest thing from the truth... I mean every chapter will have a "bad apple" however I know plenty of greeks that are the farthest things from the sterotypes!!