A Complete Rush Guide--A MUST READ!
 

I just stumbled across this website:
An Unofficial Guide to Sorority Rush
www.freewebs.com/sororityrush

It's very comprehensive....what do you guys think about it? Trash or treasure?

hijack-- LurksaLot and LaughALot?:confused: weird how these things happen

lol, I didn't even notice!

You can tell that the author really put a lot of time and effort into this site. Good information!

Co-sign, JocelynC! A few things that struck me as potentially misleading include:

* the suggestion that a good topic to talk to your rusher about is your boyfriend, if you have one -- probably not actually a great idea, since many chapters have been hassled all through Work Week to avoid "boys" as a topic, plus you might give the impression that Your Guy is so much a focus that you won't have time / interest for sisters

* the discussion of bid matching -- a really complex topic, of course -- gave me the impression that chapters "see" where a PNM ranks them. Usually this isn't true -- either it's done via computer or, where hand matching is done, advisers / alumnae who are involved are more or less sworn to confidentiality ... right?

* this one's kind of subtle, and is probably unintentional, but the suggestion about getting a "tan" really applies a lot more to women with light skin colors rather than to those with naturally darker skin colors. It would have been okay advice for some of my nieces and cousins, but not for others, for example. I'd prefer for the advice to be more inclusive.

* the advice to ask your recruitment counselor if you have questions about what to wear can be a problem, I'd think. At some schools that are out in the middle of nowhere, for instance, you may not have the ability (even if you have the spare cash) to find a store with the "right" thing(s) at the last minute.

* Designer handbags and Tiffany jewelry -- ohhhhhhhhh-kaaaayyyy, maybe at some schools, but by no means all.

* What if you find yourself cut by all chapters before Pref? Or by all chapters that you feel you click with? This isn't particularly well covered, but it can happen.

* and finally, to be awfully nit-picky, Stanford didn't have an awesome sorority scene in the 1950s; sororities were banned there in 1944 and didn't begin to return until the late 1970s and early 1980s.

cosign exlurker and jocelync

* the bit about Stanford bugs be quite a bit though, as its almost completely inaccurate. I could go on, but I won't.

* very good point about being crosscut

Ugh, I found that whole preparation and appearance section disgusting. I didn't even have the stomach to read any further after reading about losing weight, wearing ONLY designers and nothing fake, and nit-picking right down to putting baby powder between your thighs. If you really want to make a good impression appearance-wise, just make sure you're clean, neat, comfortable, dressed in appropriate styles for the particular day of recruitment, and smile!

I agree. I honestly don't think PNM's really need to see that part. All that talk about appearance can really make a rushee feel like that's ALL we're looking at. I was disgusted by the weight loss thing in particular. I can literally SEE a PNM freaking out and running for the gym and a haircut after reading this :(

Yikes! I hope some of those things were overstated. I would hope that the girls would be paying more attention to my conversation than whether or not my bracelet was fake. I mean, I know people notice those types of things, but geez, that site makes me kinda nervous!

-Jessica

We put in our recruitment handbooks examples of what to wear, as modeled by our lovely Pi Chi's. I love how they make sure to say that pantyhose during recruitment are nice, "but remember, this is August in Alabama!"

Don't worry Jessica. You are absolutely correct about what you are hoping for and I can assure you it is out there. Of course, there are the chapters that will judge you heavily on your dress, jewelery, what your parent's do, etc. And you will get this vibe when you are there believe me.

Dress is important in that it is appropriate, tasteful, you are neat in appearance, clean, etc. All of that goes along with putting your best foot forward and should most certainly be done. However, if you are doing that then don't sweat the small stuff and focus on those houses where you feel most comfortable. Trust me when I tell you that if you keep an open mind and don't feel swayed by 'the crowd' or 'the popular house' then you will find the sisterhood you are looking for.

Keep us up to date - we are so excited for you!!!

hijack-- LurksaLot and LaughALot? weird how these things happen

haha that's funny! i had it first! lol jk :D

I wonder where this girl goes to school? Designer everything? Wow I would be scared to go through rush if I had read this.

gosh, i'm impressed. with the exception of a few things, that person did a good job of rolling recruitment into a nut shell.



#1-pnm's....do not talk about your boyfriend. i have heard horror stories where a pnm was chatting away with ther sorority hostess about their boyfriends, only to find out they were talking about the SAME guy!!!! seems patty pnm's boyfriend graduated a year before her, and after pledging his undying love for her ,headed off to state u., he joined the fraternity scene and meet susie sorority whom he promptly pledged his undying love to(except when he went home to visit his parents and patty pnm), keeping both girls in the dark, until they met during recruitment. as you can imagine, both girls were devasted when they figured out what a heel they had for a boyfriend, and that party was a disaster from that moment on. patty pnm was promptly not invited back to susie's sorority, which had been her favorite. better to find this out After recruitment, when the two girls are bound in sisterhood and can both get even with the cad!!

#2-as for the getting in shape a bit, i think that it is good advice.many campuses are large and spread out. the campus of florida state is very hilly (for florida!)and pnm's walk a good distance to get from one sorority house to the other. the scheduling of your parties often has you racing from one end of campus to the opposite end and back again.if you are a couch potato and not used to so much walking, especially in the bright florida sunshine, you will arrive wilted-sore feet, flushed face, and "glowing"(gentlemen perspire, horses sweat and ladies "glow"). not putting your best foot forward.

#3- if a pnm asked to use the bathroom at a recruitment event, i never took it that she was not interested in my house. i took it that she had been to a lot of parties where beverages were offered to her, and to be polite she drank them all, and consequently she needed to go!!

#4- even though she got into a great detail about grooming and clothes selection, i feel that it could be helpful to a pnm, if taken with a grain of salt. her list of stores should be used as a guideline. you can go and look at the stores listed to see what they have, and if you can't afford it, find something comparable at a less expensive store.while we were all fortunate and our mothers told us about eyebrow plucking and makeup application, everyone hasn't been as fortunate. but pnm's, the most important thing is to be neat in appearance, clean, deodorized, mouth washed or breath minted, hair clean and nicely brushed. if you are rushing at a campus where it is especially hot and humid, and there is a nice long break for lunch, you could use the opportunity to take a quick second shower to freshen up. it just might make you feel better and give you a confidence boost. redo your hair and makeup and possibly change clothes if it has been an especially hot day.

I agree, but in my own opinion, it seems like the author of the website made more of an emphasis on losing weight rather than getting in shape.

A skinnier person might be cute and skinny b/c her metabolism is awesome, but if she's not used to moving around (e.g. walking up hills) she will be just as tired as anyone else who is not used to that activity whatever their size is.

I have to disagree with some of the things. First, the spagetti straps rule in the South. There are a lot of nice spagetti dresses that the girls model in my schools rush brochure. Next, about the cell phone, DO take your cell phone with you in case of emergencies, however, leave it on silent or quiet. However, I agree about the emergency kit.

i know at UF, tasteful strapless dress are acceptable

Plus, it just sounds STUPID. The boyfriend has nothing to do with the sorority.

white shoes...
 

My favorite part is the mentioning of no white shoes after Labor Day...I know my grandmother worries about this but I didn't know it really mattered!!!!!!! What decade is she in??

If you're rushing in the south, it matters. "No white shoes after Labor Day" is still in our chapter rules. I guess it is considered a standards infraction.

The part about thongs was foul :rolleyes: as was the emphasis on getting a tan.

What I didn't understand was the part about no hoop earrings. Do hoop earrings = trashy? I guess I am thinking of small silver or gold hoops.

Haha, Gammaphibabe, I think that she may have meant those gigantic hoop earrings that people wear. I agree that it is better to go for the less is more on the jewelry and makeup....although I think that people should apply that to every day life, not just rush!
As for the workout/tanning/clothing comments, I really think she was just being honest and conveying her experience at a competitive school. I don't want anyone to get upset at me for saying this, but as we all know...rush is a very superficial process-particularly at a competitive school. Just like a job interview or first date, first impressions are very important during rush. If you feel like you look your best, you are most likely to convey confidence to people...which is an attractive quality. A pnm should try to make a good first impression just as the chapters are trying to do the same thing. (We always had our rush outifts months before, had to go through dress check, etc.) So whatever it takes for you to feel like you look good, whether that is working out during the summer, wearing your nicest dress, mystic tanning (which is great by the way!), wearing your favorite necklace, whatever...do it and you will feel your best during rush!

LOL, I expected the site to piss me off after reading the comments here, but really it didn't. I don't think it's a bad thing, for example, to tell PNMs not to wear fake designer things. As a handbag freak myself, I can generally tell a fake in seconds, and I wouldn't think less of someone for carrying a fake, but I'd wonder whether she is so insecure that she feels she needs a Louis Vuitton when she can't afford one. She doesn't say that designer clothes or accessories are necessary, but I think her point to either wear designer or something cute and inexpensive but not fake is a good one.

I don't understand the tanning thing, though. I didn't even know people still tanned.

Your age is showing. ;)

Tanning has surged in popularity in the last five-ish years . . . I remember looking through sorority formal pictures online and seeing maybe one girl in every house that wasn't fake-baked. It's ridiculous.

Tracy, I am so glad that PNMs are not allowed to bring their handbags into the room with them during Recruitment. I just can't deal with the fake Vuittons.

The most disgusting thing about the tanning was her seeming to say "if you're too much of a wuss to tan the REAL way, you can fake-n-bake." I don't know, I may be wrong but that's how I took it. Although beds can cause damage same as the sun...I don't use self tanner because we need to stamp out the whole idea that a tan is desirable, period. If that's your normal skin color fine, but for most people it's not.

hahaha!! i love that quote. seriously, 99% of the LV-patterns around are really Bouis Bouttons.

Seriously, some of the points in this would work at PSU which isn't as competitive as Indiana, Purdue, Illinois (PSU is a smaller rush than the other Big 10 schools with the exception of Minnesota) but if someone wants to get into the Big 12 sororities, they better be prepared to be as trendy as possible. However, the white after Labor Day rule doesn't count as much up north.

sorry!!
 

I went to a very small school in Arkansas that doesn't even really have formal recruitment. We call it formal but compared to these stories I have heard it's nothing!!! (We also only have 3 npc groups on campus.) Anyways, If I offended you I am soo sorry...I am just used to everything being very very informal and laid-back. I promise I didn't mean it that way. = )

after reading that site, i must say.. i'm kind of intimidated! it seems like a lot of work! :eek:

I don't know a whole lot about sororoity recruitment but it seems that a lot of people are getting all freaked out and making more out of it than it should be...

Now be honest... Recruitment is going to be different anywhere you go, so write an article that would fit every school's standards and guidelines of recruitment would be damn impossible.

Her article is well written and seems to be written from experience. It is most definately biased from her views of her own greek system (a large and compeititve one) so I'm sure many of the things which she writes about that many of you disagree with may not fit your greek system specifically, but fits those similar to hers. Shes spreading information to help prepare PNMs for rush, not creating a set of strict guidelines which everyone must follow.

The weight and hair issue... I dunno how to get into that one. She doesn't say "go get skinny"... It seemed to me that she was just merely suggesting that if you're out of shape and want to insure the best chances for you getting a first choice, get in shape... Look as good as you can... As much as many of you will try and deny it, how you look is a part of the decision process. It is much easier to get a haircut, wear nice clothes and possibly get in better shape (note she said better shape, not get skinny. it is a fact that better shape includes better endurance) than to say "make sure the grades that you've already completed are good" or "make sure you have an outgoing friendly personality"... You can't change your grades and you can't change your personality but you can choose how you appear to people. First impressions are very important and ask around... The first thing a person will judge you on when seeing you is how you are dressed. How you look... etc...

I can see in a situation like rush where there really just isn't much time to show all of your other great qualities, how something so seemingly insignificant as your haircut, clothing, etc can have quite an impact. Every little bit helps...

I think she did a very good job writing this. Nothing should be taken to heart, as with most other things you read, but it is very informative and could really help a PNM get off to a good start.

Thats my 2 cents.

-Matt

You are very smart for a boy. I agree with what you've said.

I agree with FSU Zeta comments. Florida is HHHOOOTTT and HUMID in August so to keep your energy going between houses (without looking wilted and drained), being healthy and in shape is a smart idea!! (The baby powder between the thighs was a good tip too). I don't think the author of the article meant that in order to get a bid, you needed to look like a supermodel. I think it meant that you needed to make the most of what you have. Eat a balanced diet, exercise, wear something that makes you feel special.

Rush is a very superficial process. HOLD ON. I say this because you get a minute here or there to make an impression on multiple strangers on multiple days.

Someone who appears physically fit, well-groomed and put-together is going to be considered more desirable. Studies have been done that show EMPLOYERS select more attractive people over less attractive people in job interviews time after time. So, if you are going through rush in the fall... take the time to look classy and composed. If you don't what that means, pick up an Ann Taylor catalogue. You can still add your own personal flair with signature jewelry and your makeup. Also, if you're going to school in the South, Northeast, Southwest, Mid-west, West Coast... there are going to be different "looks." College Panhellenic websites are a beautiful thing to get a feel for those looks.

Also remember that while your individuality is respected, as a sorority member, you are becoming part of a GROUP. And as diverse as each person in that group, there is a certain amount of conformity-- rules of conduct, etc. And like it or not, some chapters do have a certain unintentional "look" about them-- it just comes of a group of women living together. It's not an attempt to squash anyone. So while you're not a total conformist for being a sister, there is still a level of conformity that will vary from school to school, chapter to chapter.

Ditto to greencat's comment about the looks component being a neccessary evil...it sucks that recruitment is like that, that you only have five minutes to make a kick-ass impression, but hopefully someday sorority recruitment will change to reflect the growing disatisfaction with the process...

However, showing up looking unkempt, unstyled and sometimes gross is not the way to express your individuality or to prove a point...i think a lot of chapter members complain about the superficiality or conformity of rush and then sabotage their wardrobe choices or looks just to prove a point...but really, it's cutting off your nose to spite your face...some PNMs might appreciate the 'relaxed' nature of your chapter but i think most of them actually will prefer another one that presents a poised and maintained image...

...though i do think that image does not always have to have Louis Vuitton bags and Tiffany diamonds :eek: now THAT was funny, since i remember the one complaint of my Rho Chi group was about one house who had all of these girls wearing Tiffany bracelets with the logo on them and they thought they were just showing off

Re: Designer handbags
 

Ok, no white shoes after Labor Day... that rule never disappeared!

I go to a small Southern school (3 NPCs), and while we would by no means consider white shoes grounds for a no-pref, it's still nice to follow the most basic rule of shoes. ;)

That said, no one needs to wear a fake Louis or Prada or Kate Spade... I would actually be more impressed by a one-of-a-kind purse. Get a cute purse from a boutique or even a thrift store (or handmade if you are creative) if you can make it work. It adds a little uniqueness, and if it looks good with the outfit, you will probably get tons of compliments (you will also be remembered). My friend from high school always wears the most unique clothes (often homemade), and she was voted "Best Dressed" in our school.

Just another option.