OK where do late 20-somethings go to meet men?
 

Hey everyone, I am 28 and recently got out of a long-term relationship earlier this year. I am looking to move on but WHERE do you meet quality guys? It seems like everyone close to my age is either married, gay or has too many "issues". *SIGH*. I am enjoying being single and just doing my own thing though, don't get me wrong. The latest guy I was dating just decided he is moving to Florida in 3 wks. Actually that is okay because I wasn't really "feeling it" for him. OK, I am sure this will get the conversation going :) :) :)

Although I'm not single, I can tell you where NOT to be guys. Bars. There may be some women out there who met the man of their dreams at a bar but I've never met those women.

My friends in their twenties have met their significant others through mutual friends or co-workers. Also, get involved in some community organizations. This is another way to meet someone.

My friends have found that meeting someone through mutual friends/co-workers or through an organization that they're a member of (Kiwanis, fitness club, Church) that they'll meet someone they have more in common with. With a bar, many of times the only thing you have in common with the other person is....well....hooking up. That's not to say that a great relationship can't blossom with someone you met out at a bar but many times people go out to meet someone for just a one-night stand rather than an actual long-term relationship.

my parents met in a bar and my sister and her husband met in a bar, so my old roomate at school told me that i need to hang out at bars more often b/c it's in my family genes to meet someone in a bar!

Re: OK where do late 20-somethings go to meet men?
 

Well, your question is hard to answer. Most people in their late 20's should have moved on to a point in their life where they don't have a need to be out in the streets all the time.

The best way to meet a person you will like is to get out and do things that you like to do. Salsa dance, take a cooking class, join an improvisational theatre, go to faris and expos. Go out and do things that you enjoy and surely you will meet a person who likes the same things.

Some things to keep in mind:

Do engage people in conversations
Do not talk on your cell phone
Do smile at everyone
Do not wear shades
Do try and find some friends that simply share your interests
Do not try a force a love connection

That's a good question that I do not have an answer to! I don't do the bar and club scene, but I wouldn't want to try to make my love match there, anyway. Most people in my grad program are women. So, I have no idea where to meet someone!

hey, i hear all of ya! especially DZ girl. i just graduated from social work school so it was majority women. i go out a couple of times per week but i am not into meeting guys in bars either, it has never worked out for me. and i am very pessimistic to that whole meeting a guy on line thing. oh well. i think it takes awhile to meet the right person especially in this day and age.

I hear you! I haven't the faintest idea where to find a man. I have joined organizations and stuff but all the men I meet seem to be married or otherwise taken.

I know they have to be hiding somewhere. :)

Or workaholics! That's a big one here in NYC! They care more about working 80 hrs a week then having a g/f. Or they live a bit too far away for me. I find a lot of guys live in NJ or Long Island which is a hike to get to from the boros of NYC. And finally there's the ones that (no offense cuz this may sound bad) there is absolutely no attraction towards (physically/emotionally).

I just met my latest late20something guy thru a friend who teaches at a different school. So watch out, the NYC late 20somethings are being scooped out by the early 20 something gals :p In all seriousness, the summer's coming who knows what great people will be in our most fabulous city!!

Nothing wrong with that.

-Rudey

I'm only in my early 20's so I don't know if any of this will help. But here's what I've learned about guys: you just cannot meet someone if it's not time for it yet. So what do you do? Instead of going crazy trying to meet someone (because trust me you'll prolly end up settling for less than you should), then wait for it to happen. I don't mean sit around at home and expect that. :p But, like others have said, find some things to get involved with. You live in NYC, and I KNOW there are a lot of things in that city to get involved with. Persue things that interest you, and you are BOUND to meet someone who shares your interests. And if not, then you've made friends and gotten involved in something really cool.

I know I'm rambling, but to sum it up: concentrate on YOU. Do what YOU want to do, persue YOUR interests, live your like how YOU want to, and things will eventually fall into place. Yes, it does take time. :)

Good luck sweetie. :)

hey sairose, you are right. i have learned way too much from my last significant relationship to not just settle anymore. there are too many guys out there that aren't worthy of our time or emotions. i've always met guys anyways when i wasn't actually looking. most of them too were already friends of mine that i had no idea were even interested. good luck to everyone who is searching for mr. right! :)

Hey Hey Hey! Maybe you were the evil one in the relationship! ;)

James, Allison is not evil at all! :p

Just go out and do your thing. You'll meet someone before you know it when you are least expecting it.

BTW I met my bf in a bar as have many of my friends.

I know this may be a big no-no for some people, but I met my boyfriend at work. If you don't want to date a co-worker, maybe your co-workers can introduce you to some of their friends.

Thanks Noreen! I don't know how "my being evil" was interpreted by that post.

Regardless, break-ups are not always a bad thing, you learn a lot from them, and also many people are not meant to be together. It doesn't make either person "evil".

Obviously the person getting dumped often is angry at the person doing the dumping in the beginning but everything happens for a reason I believe.

Granted some people do "evil" things to each other when they are together but that post was not called for James.

Re: OK where do late 20-somethings go to meet men?
 

Do you play any sports? Sign up for a coed intramural league. It will be 90% guys. For a girl that looks good it will be like shooting fish in a barrel.

I co-sign on getting involved in something else that you enjoy. I know that can be hard since you probably spend a lot fo time working, but the more you enjoy things, they more boys will enjoy you :-)

Interesting way to put it . . . .

I met my latest guy through one of my alumnae sisters actually. They are cousins. We are going to a BBQ tonite with a bunch of his all HS friends. Should be fun times.

I've known a lot of couples who have have met at work, but the best way is if you're in a different department. You know what type of worker they are, you know they have a job/income, and you have more opportunities to find out what you have in common in a neutral setting.

I've always wondered about this. I've never known anyone in my field to have met this way, but have heard of it in others. Maybe that is because I am a Social Worker and everyone is so concerned about "ethical responsibilities" and all of that stuff if ya know what I am saying, and how it "reflects" on our work, especially related to clients and "if they (the clients) found out. "

In both places it's been in the financial services field, it's never been an issue really. The only time it was an issue was when the two people were on the same team, but they both had the Jerry Springer element to them anyway (talk about an HR nightmare). I've never dated anyone at work for that reason (and there was no one hot enough in another dept. to pursue ;) ).

LOL. I feel ya. There is no one at my agency of hundreds of employees that I would be remotely interested in anyways. I also believe in the expression "not sh---ing where I eat", to be blunt:D

Re: OK where do late 20-somethings go to meet men?
 

In colonial times you would be labeled an old maid- like my sister!

I wouldn't hate on bars -- I met Mr. valkyrie at a bar, a cheesy sports bar no less.

Parties.

Parties are as social as bars, w/o the stereotype. Usually you and anyone you meet at a party will have something in common that brought you there.

I met mr. amycat at a party two years ago today. he was on a date at the time. lol

Playa playa!

I don't know. Guys our age (I'm 28 too) just don't do the 10-2 bar crawl anymore. Or at least not nearly as often. You can still meet a solid guy in a bar but he's more likely to be out for Happy Hour or around dinner time than late night.

What city are you in? A friend of mine just joined a sport/social club. Also...MATCH.COM!

Happy Hour is absolutely correct. You can't go wrong with the afterwork crew.