Ugly Babies
 

(Before you get the "all babies are beautiful" propaganda out of your mouth, let me say that this probably isn't the right thread for you! ;) )

So one of my instructors had a baby a few days ago and posted pictures on the web so that the class could see them.

I'm in a largely female professional school, so when my classmates saw the photo, the women went crazy going "Ohhh!! What a cute baby! He's just PRECIOUS!" and all that kind of stuff like that there. Meanwhile, I exchanged looks with one of the only men in the class - who incidentally is a good friend of mine - and we both agreed that it was one of the ugliest, jugheadiest babies we'd ever seen.

I don't have much maternal instinct, I'll admit that straight away, but I'm curious: what do you do when someone shows you a picture of their baby and you know they're fishing for an obligatory "Oh, isn't little Vlad Dracul the cutest!" from you? Do you tell them it's cute, say something else, or make like you're busy so that they don't come over to your desk?

Re: Ugly Babies
 

If approached, lie like a rug! :D

Re: Ugly Babies
 

My mother and grandmother always said you say something like:

"What a fine baby!"

"Look how healthy he/she is"

or the basic "awwwwwww"

Usually you can find something to praise the baby on:

He has such a strong grip!

She's such a happy baby!

Look at all that hair!

I never say a baby is cute unless I mean it.

I normally say something like "Oh, he has his fathers eyes!" or "What a cute romper? Who knit that?" or something to compliment a non-ugly part. Once I was feeling snarky and not a fan of the mother, so I said "She looks JUST like you!"

What Eclipse said.... I'm the maternal type that thinks *almost* all babies are adorable... but damn if there aren't some ugly ones out there. In that case, there's always..

"Oh, look how much hair he has!" (subconciously) .... on his feet
"What stunning eyes"... red eyes? Is this the devil child?
"What precious little features"... for a raccoon

you get the idea :)

LOL!!!!

Anyone who's been a good rusher knows that there's always SOME redeemable quality one can mention, if necessary. And it's ALWAYS necessary when it comes to a baby!

I'm big on the "look at those cute lil toes!" or "Isn't he/she precious?"

Exactly! My manager jokes that I should hold a mock rush school for other co-workers since I'm just so good at complimenting people, even if it is "My what a lovely necklace" while I'm thinking "Ma'am, your neck looks like a tree trunk."

Okay, I am a new mother, and I have to admit...I THINK MOST NEWBORNS ARE UGLY!

I was terrified that I would think my daugther was horrid when she was born. I knew I loved her regardless, but I was scared of giving birth to something that looked like a plucked chicken. Thankfully (and this could be the maternal bias) she's gorgeous and perfect in everyway *gag gag* ;).

But back to the subject at hand...Never, EVER admit you think a baby is less than adorable (trust me from experience-I told a friend in junior high that I thought her baby brother was ugly. Her mother STILL won't speak to me!). I agree with greeklawgirl-lie like a rug, and then gouge your eyes out when you look away :)

I think all babies are fugly for about 3 months at least, which makes me very concerned about ever having one. I'm glad to hear that Nikki_DZ was worried about this too, because I'm horrified of it.

Anyway, you could try the whole "Bless her heart!" Because, you know, kids like that need all the blessings they can get, right?

I used to use the "Don't babies smell wonderful?!" line, until I got handed a muddy baby. blech.

Nothing says birth control like a muddy baby!!

Ginger, you have me crying with laughter over here. "On his feet...". HEE!

LOLZ, I think that everybody knows I don't like babies, at all, so I'm usually not in a situation where I'm expected to comment on one. I'd probably say something like "Oh cool" and run from the room.

Anyone remember the Seinfeld episode with the ugly baby? Elaine and Jerry didn't want to come right out and say that the baby was fugly so they just said, "Oh, what a breathtaking baby!"

When my husband's brother's daughter was born 4 years ago the poor thing looked looked like a sack of flour with tiny, beady eyes. Trying to be diplomatic, but not wanting to lie, I commented that she was, indeed, breathtaking.

I guess my brother-in-law and sister-in-law didn't watch Seinfeld because they still talk to me.


Sistermadly, you KNOW you have to post the link now!!!!!

LOL, "You gotta see the bay-beeee!" :D

I thought about posting the link, but I figured it might be kind of cruel to do it publicly.

Of course, that doesn't mean that I won't post it in PM. ;)

This is what I do, too! Usually the parent takes it as a compliment, when I mean it the complete opposite way of course. It works out quite nicely ;)

I'm a postpartum nurse, and I'll be the first one to tell you that many newborns look like monkeys.

I have perfected the straight-faced "Oh, what a cute baby he is!"; along with "That's a beautiful name!" (I don't know what some people are thinking when they name their kids).

As a mom of two, I think all newborns are ugly. My son's baby picture was so hideous that I didn't even send out baby announcements. Luckily, both my kids were much cuter by the 3 month picture!

Dee

Their teeny tiny fingers and toes, especially fingernails are amazing though!

"Oh, that's a baby all right!":p

All babies aren't attractive, but again they're babies, why should they be?
But NO BABIES ARE UGLY!!!!!!!!!!!!111:mad:

tehetehe
:D

Ya'll mean

I usually just say," Hey the baby looks nothing like you, you are so much taller and have more hair."


Cause, i hate it when people are like, "omg he/she/it looks just like you (the un-DNA-tested parent) . . . please.

I guess it goes with the whole get your eyes examined theme in this thread.

Ha..that's too funny

That reminds me of a friend of mine, Judy who could compliment a hemmorhoid.

The girl with broad shoulders gets complimented with, "I bet she's really strong and works out!"

The guy with the bad haircut gets, "I bet its so easy to take care of!"

The girl with the potty mouth gets, "She can certainly communicate how shes feeling!"

Re: Ugly Babies
 

In the tradition of our old friend KABillyMac, I nominate the above for quote of the week.

Show us the jughead baby! :)

I think that most babies are really cute. If they aren't beautiful, they do really cute things like make funny faces or stick their toes in their mouths.

My bf and I saw two babies a few weeks ago. One was really pretty, and the other was just ok looking. He said that he felt bad for the parents since their baby was so ugly compared to the pretty girl. He's really mean, but funny. :p

Re: Re: Ugly Babies
 

I'm gonna have to second that nomination! :D

See, I didn't know all newborns were ugly. I've never been close enough to one that was just "pooped out" to know. So maybe that's what is wrong with this kid.

But for starters? The kid only has one eyebrow and he looks like a Monchichi gone wrong. It has to get better, because it can't get worse!

ETA: My instructor's kid could give the kids on this page a run for their money.

BWAHAHAH! :D

I need to learn this skill. I'm a steel magnolia with too much "steel" and not enough "magnolia".

Whoa! Follow the link, then look at the picture that's the last on the right in the top row. That baby looks like he's melting or something. Or else like a really old melty man dressed up in a romper.

hahhahahaha!!!!:D
That poor child 8th in from the left on the top row-- It is pretty ugly too---- and damn, the 9th and 10th on the top row--I thought my boys had BIG heads--I was wrong!!! wow!!!!


And yes, as a mother of two I will say, some babies are just plain ugly!! As a parent, you don't want to admit it--but you know it!!!
-wendi

OMG yall need to STOP. This is to damn funny. First with the monchichi (i have a brother we call that, lol). But then with the 'really old melty man'.

lololol. hahhahahahahha.

Stop, ya'll are killing me.

BTW - baby #11, IS baby Jean-Luc Picard from the FUTURE!

HELL AWAITS ALL OF YA'LL!!!!!


:D

*gets her marshmallows ready for the toasting* ;)

I was an ugly baby :(

yeah, I got my seat saved already, so.....


I always say, "what a SWEET baby!" and I NEVER use boy/girl, cause sometimes, you just dont know!!!! I have always had this fear of "what a sweet little boy", as the parents give me the death look and say, "ITS A GIRL".
a friend of mine has a little girl who has RED hair and glasses, and is just not cute at all! and I feel so bad for her, (the little girl) and myself, cause I know I am just evil to think that about this little 8 year old. Owell, maybe she will have that "ugly-duckling" syndrome and end up beautiful. Wow, I am so terrible.

O well.:cool: