How Do You Know...
 

With all the talk on here about promise rings and brides-to-be, it got me thinking...

How do you know when it's the right guy, and it's love, and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them?

When I can't think of why I love him and I just do :D

I think you're going to end up divorced with 3 babies and some sort of a pet bird.

-Rudey
--That's just what I think though.

Re: How Do You Know...
 

Good question.

Ehh...I'm not much for birds..maybe a dog though...

Don't ask me...I've failed at my past relationships. But I will tell you this much. You know he's a good guy when the Pro list starts outweighing the Con list ;) OH! And when your family/parents like him...really, really like him!

Don't ask me....never been in TRUE love!!

Don't ask me, either...no one in my family gets it right, so I doubt I will either! Let's see...everyone's been married at least twice, and my grandmother's on her fourth husband, so...the odds don't look so hot! :p

i always wondered about that question. i hate the anwser, 'you just know':rolleyes:

i thing that when you sacrifice your happiness for theirs, that is true love. but you dont look at it as sacrificing, you just love them so much that you want them to be happy. when they go through the crap of life, you unselfishly go through it with them, because you dont want them to be alone.

just my opinion

Our director of Greek Life once told me at a retreat "When you know, you know" (he had been talking about how he married his wife after only knowing her for three months). I thought it was all a bunch of b.s. until I met my now fiance--- and it's true--- when you know, you know.

when your relationship doesn't feel like work - it is still as much as fun as day one

he sits by the toilet with a wet washcloth on a Saturday night with you when your hurling because of a migraine

he goes with you to an Oral Surgeon appt to get your bridge worked because you are scared to go alone - and then doesn't make any toothless jokes

your head fits in that little cubby under his neck on his shoulder

even after years of waking up to each other, he still kisses you on the forehead when he thinks you are still asleep and whispers "I love you" before he heads out to work


hmm....I'll think of some more here soon :)

I agree with people on the "when you know, you know" theory... there's just one problem - sometimes you think you know, and you turn out to be wrong.

You hear so many stories of couples who thought they were going to be together forever... and then it ends. It's sad...

Anyway, I have a new boy... hopefully it's going somewhere good! :)

When you can potty in front of each other and not be self concious.

Then I do not ever want to be in love.:eek:

I know people get used to one another and all, but naw playa...ew.....

hahah. I mean you handeling biznass and its ok if they gotta pass through to get somethign in the bathroom. I dotn mean being all in there for the full effect. lol.

I really find that to be foul. My roommate is always using the bathroom with her boyfriend in there and it totally grosses me out!

As someone who has talked to two different pastors for counseling on this very topic in the past week, my feeling is that:

When you are willing and do give 100% to your relationship, putting that person in the front of whatever your plans may be

AND

When that person ALSO is willing and does give 100% to your relationship, putting you in front of whatever plans are made.

Marriage isn't 50/50% - it's 100/100% There's a lot of sacrifice involved, but it has to be made by both partners, not just one. It's when you start to think as "we" and "our" and forget about "me" and "mine".

Quote:

Originally posted by lifesaver

I'm guilty of doing that with my ex-boyfriend. And he and I were very serious... we did discuss marriage once randomly on the beach and we were like yeah, let's get married! It felt right at the time... but months later we broke up after a year and a half, we just grew apart... and now I know it wouldn't have been the right decision for me, being the person I've become now and the same for him.

I will probully Jinx myself for saying this...
 

You just know.


Sad to say because when i wasnt in love i would HATE when people say that but now that I am and have been for a good time I just know.

Its when you get the butterflys ALL the time. When he is all you think about. When for once you heart and you head tell you its right.


You just know....and one day it just clicks and life FINALLY makes sense.:)

Re: I will probully Jinx myself for saying this...
 

I'm just wondering what you consider a "good time." Two years when you're a college junior is a lot different from two years when you're out of college.

It's also kind of true that it's really about timing... You can be insanely compatible with someone, but just not be ready to be together and settled forever - based on the experiences of so many people I know and know of (and myself), it's not just love. That's not enough. You have to be mature and ready to handle a relationship.

So if you are ready, you can meet and just know and it will work. But if you're not, you can meet and know and love each other and still it won't work. Did that make any sense?

I agree. I also agree with the posts from MereMere and honeychile

That's probably why I'm not ready to get married yet. I don't want to sound selfish, but there have been relationships in my past that I gave more and them less, and I wound up putting things I valued and hoped for on hold.

It's all about compromise in my opinion. I don't believe anything is ever 100%/100%. No one can get along and come to a conclusion that benefits both all the time. It's a matter of making concessions and knowing the limits of the relationship.

But marriage is a whole different story :p

P.S. I TOTALLY believe in pre-marriage counseling with a religious figure! I think that is EXTREAMLY important and from what I've heard it puts EVERYTHING out on the table. Lets face it, there are certain issues couples don't always think of until it's too late.

I've always thought it was the whole "when you know, you know" thing, too.... But I thought I knew once, got scared, and bailed on him.

It only took nearly 3 years, a long different relationship and break up with someone else, and a ton of idiots I've dated to realize I screwed up. Now I'm hoping I'll be able to get a second chance and actually let myself go with it this time...