Advice about having Mom go through AI...
 

Hi there!

I haven't really got the time to search around for threads about women who have had their mothers go through the AI process, so throw me a little bone...

Here's the scoop: I've discussed AI for my mom with my chapter advisor (her mom did AI, too) and with some of my sisters (who adore my mom), and decided to wait for a little bit before bringing the subject up to her. My mother has been very involved in my life, esp. since joining Gamma Phi and I would love for her to share something like this with me. My big sis, who works with my mom (and my mom knew her before she knew me!) mentioned to my mom today that the Alum Advisory board discussed my mom and one of my sister's moms for AI a couple days ago. My mom hadn't really gotten much info on it, so my big sis filled her in a little bit and promised to bring her info when she could.

Has anyone on GC helped your mom or another family member get involved through AI? I would love this for my mom, but don't really have much information, and honestly, I'm a little hesitant because I don't want anything to "backlash" on me and make my mom and I grow apart.

Thanks!

Carol

I was seriously just about to make this post. And as long as we're on the same thread, there is a SigEp sweetheart that I love dearly and want her to be a Gamma Phi so badly it hurts. How do we go about discussing AI with people to keep them interested? I think for a lot of the younger alumnae, we support the idea but don't know how to broach the topic.

I have not personally had a family member pursue AI but I have been present when the mother of a Pi Phi was initiated and know of at least one instance where the daughter, as chapter president conducted the ceremony where her mother was being initiated. I don't know if I'd be able to get the words out correctly if it was me!!

It would be a special thing to share with your mom but I think you need to first ask her if she is interested and if she is eligible for Gamma Phi's AI process (some groups have requirements for college attendance or degree). When your mom was in college, were there sororities? Was she simply not interested at the time, or didn't have the opportunity to join? She may be very interested to me the involved mom but not have ever thought about joining herself.

Good luck! Let us know if you are able to share the bonds of sisterhood with your mom (sort of a reverse legacy!!)

Great question...
I know that Maharet AI'd into Alpha Phi and then her Mom did too.
Also, I know that AOIISilver AI'd into AOII and then her Mom did too. You may wish to PM these ladies and ask them for their input on this thread?

If you have questions specifically about Gamma Phi Beta, you might want to ask GPhiBLtColonel to chime in on this thread, since she is the "grand poobah" of knowledge when it comes to AI specifically into Gamma Phi Beta.

I'd start by inviting the person to an alumnae chapter event and gauging her reaction from there.

And Gamma Phi does not have a college attendance requirement.

See, the issue here is that there is not an alum chapter that is active where she is living, and she is much closer in age to the collegians anyway. She will be moving to Milwaukee within the next year but really has gotten excited about AI now.

AI for moms
 

I think AI is wonderful for moms. I just asked my mom if she would be interested and showed her the materials for AI....especially since she was already going with me to all of my activities. She was delighted. The collegians were delighted with my mom, and her AI journey took only three weeks total. She will be celebrating her AOII birthday this Saturday.

Does G Phi B have an alumnae initiate brochure or pamphlet to share with your mom?

Silver

And that link is about the only official thing we have, as far as I've been able to find.

Do other orgs have brochures or pamphlets?

We actually have a complete packet of information that goes to the alumnae chapter (upon request) from IH, one for each woman they are interested in. But, it's for the chapter, most of the info does not go to the AI.

I've asked about public information...........

I think that's as good as it gets for the various NPC groups...a blurb on a website, but no "glossy pamphlets" (at least not yet that I know of...maybe soon!? ;) ). DG addresses AI on its website too, as do a few others (Alpha Phi, Gamma Phi Beta, Alpha Sigma Tau, Pi Beta Phi, AOII...can't think of any others right now. I did find a link for ADPi, but I had to seriously dig for it. See my post
here for the various links.)
As for as I know, DG does not have a brochure or pamphlet but I know for me, I filled out a form that was basically for "Prospective Alumnae Initiates". It asked what I was doing now for employment, if I completed my degree, if I had ever been initiated into an NPC org, that type of thing.)
------------------
On another note, I realize that we are primarily discussing AI with regards to "reverse legacies" (for lack of a better word). But, since we are focussing in mostly on Gamma Phi Beta, I wanted to share this beautiful story with you where GPhiBLtColonel AI'd one of her friends (who was a GFB legacy) into Gamma Phi Beta, because the friend's mom was a Gamma Phi Beta and had always wanted her daughter to become one. The Mom was in her 80s and died not long afterwards. It's quite a moving post and since some of you are relative newcomers, you may not have seen it. Click here.

AOII AI pamphlets and brochures
 

AOII has a complete packet that may be sent to a prospective AI. It contains a pamphlet with information as well as a brand new, shiny large brochure...complete with pictures and quotes. The packet also contains the application for AI with directions on how to fill it out and to whom the filled out papers must be sent. Our Alumnae Service Coordinator deserves props for putting together such an informative and well-designed packet!
:)
The brochure is actually on-line, as well, as part of an issue of _To Dragma_. Right now the AOII site is down; but when it gets back up, I will leave a link to the brochure.
:)
Silver

Re: AOII AI pamphlets and brochures
 

I think this is it here

Yep!
 

That is one page of the shiny neat brochure!
Thanks, Cutie! You are awesome!
Silver

I find this a fasinating and great thing!:)

The simple reason being, that Moms/Dads do live the Greek Life with the Kids and become very attatched to The Particular Organization.

While they do not Know about Ritual, they do know about the workings of The Siblings Group. They do become involved vicarously in a way.

Fraternitys have a different attitude about AI, and While I would love to see my Father be My Brother as He hung with all of the crap that I went through and met most of the guys when I started the Local! I think one of the few times he was actually proud of me!:confused:

I know, We did Iniatite a Advisor who was head of a Dept at school, it is so funny,

We had lunch during a Mentoring session that the Alums run, and the email from him when it was over was it is funny, the Lowest # and The Youngest # who are about the same age are having lunch!

I appreciate you telling Me, My Son who has a lower # than mine is now My Brother, My Son!

I think this is a fantastic Idea!:cool:

Thank you guys for all your help! My dad said my mom is really excited about the idea of AI right now, and he's excited for her. My mom could really use something like this in her life- she and my dad have a great relationship, but my dad has his own circle of Harley riding friends (my mom has a lot of friends, but only a few close ones). With my brother living 400 miles away and the possibilities of me going just as far or further away, I think she might get horribly lonely. Not to mention, her own blood sister has about 13 grandkids and 3 great-grandkids (my mom has none yet... and not counting on it for a long time, lol), so she doesn't have quite as much of a connection with her sister as she used to.

I think I'll try to get my mom out to the first few alum events of the year and see how she likes it. She knows a lot of our alums all ready (from hosting chapter events at my house, Parents Days, helping me plan events, etc), so I think she'd love it- and I hope so!

I'll keep you guys updated. If you have any other advice, please let me know!

Carol

PS: Kathleen- great minds think alike! :)

I have a friend that I want to approach about DG AI. She would be a fabulous addition to our sisterhood. She had a disastrous rush at a southern school back in the late 80s. Her older sister was in a top GLO at UT. She is well versed in collegiate greek life, am not sure she sees the benefit of alumnae greek life.

Have been searching for a way to bring it up to her for awhile.

You could go one of two ways:

1. If you have a group of Sisters in the area, invite her along to meet them and then get a reaction.

2. Just plain come out and ask Her.

Can give maybe one of two answers, Yes or No!

Hey Gphiangel624 ,


I think its a great idea---go for it!!! :D

Mich

I just wanted to say a big "Thank you" to all who have given info on this matter. For the longest time I have wished my mother could join a sorority. Due to personal reasons she was never able to go to college. We've talked about it a lot, and she's told me on many occasion that she's saddened that she couldn't attend college nor join a sorority. I know many times my mother lives through me because she was never able to live out that dream of hers. To top it off, her closest cousin went to my college years ago and was a Tri-Delt here. I bought her the Pi Phi mother's pin to give her a small taste of my affiliation.

I think it's time I give her some AI info. :)

Pi Phi does have AI info right on their website.... :)
http://www.pibetaphi.org/alumnae/alumn_initiates.html
These 2 links are from the "old website" but I still wanted to include them
http://www.pibetaphi.org/pub/focarch2.htm
http://www.pibetaphi.org/alum/alinitiates.htm

Thank you Cutie Pie for all the great comments. :) I am happy to chat -- via email -- with anyone seriously interested in Gamma Phi Beta AI either for herself or for her mom, sister or whoever. I emphasize the "seriously" because a few unnamed GC PNAMs have emailed me about Gamma Phi AI but they let me know they were also considering other GLO's.

Regarding moms & AI: About 7 years ago, I talked to my mom about it and she said okay -- she was excited. She had never completed college -- instead she got married to my dad before her freshman year ended. She did go thru rush while she was at college and she told me she would have pledged a sorority had she stayed in college. Well I was hoping to have her initiated into my chapter. Unfortunately, one of my biological sisters got Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma during her pregnancy and passed away 2 years after being diagnosed. My mom's heart was just not into sorority stuff after that....until my youngest biological sister pledge Theta! Now we argue about which GLO my mom should be AI'd into and my mom just holds up her hands and says Girls, stop arguing! Sigh! :rolleyes: When I go back home for Christmas I think I will seriously ask her again about Gamma Phi AI.

Here is how I approached my son's teacher last year about becoming a Gamma Phi AI -- I created a little "propaganda" flyer about Gamma Phi and why it was such a great sorority to belong to etc etc...it just so happened that four other alums in our alum chapter here also knew her and said they enthusiastically supported her becoming an AI. But none of us really knew how she'd respond. So I set an appt & met with her when I knew she had some time (the kids were in P.E.) and I gave her the flyer as I told her that Me and Joan and Sarah and Larkie and Suzanne all want you to be a sister in Gamma Phi Beta. I even had all these Gamma Phi magazines to show her - esp the one with the cover of the President of Ohio State (where she got her Masters degree) - who is a Gamma Phi! I was all set to do the hard sell! Well, I only got a few words out and she wouldn't let me finish --she jumped up from her seat and said Yes Yes Yes!!! It was wonderful! I did her "pledge" training along with CLUEY from GC --(she flew in from Jacksonville).

There is indeed a folder that Gamma Phi AI candidates get after their initial paperwork is sent in -- that paperwork is signed by the alum chapter and the collegiate chapter where the initiation will eventually take place. The folder has info about Gamma Phi and the services/benefits of membership, but it is not real detailed. For the "pledge" training, our wonderfully huge history book is sent to the AI candidate and the test (open-book) is taken from there. I usually do a three hour training session with the AI candidates.

I am a HUGE supporter of AI!

Geeky Penguin and I have talked already about her mom -- whom I personally think should be initiated at our next convention in nearby Chicago next July -- hint hint!) and gphiangel624, please email me if you want OK?

gotta go -- my fingers hurt!

;)

Wow... Just a thought I'd never considered... What if your mom pursued AI with a different group than your group?! :eek: I am a only child so I guess it would be a little more hurtful than Cele's case (if her mom chose Theta for whatever reason at least she could justify it some, through her sister) but gee... I mean, I know we always encourage PNM legacies to follow their hearts... But for me, I think it would be even harder with my mother than my (future) daughter.

UPDATE!
 

Hey there! So today was Bid Day for my collegiate chapter and I attended with a bunch of other alums, including the collegiate and alumnae chapter presidents (spent the whole weekend with both, helping with recruitment). The collegiate chapter advisor brought the official alumnae packet for me to give my mom and she's even more stoked now! If everything goes right, I'll be sponsoring her and she'll initiate with the new members of Delta Lambda chapter in January, and another sisters' mom as well! YAY!!!!

Re: UPDATE!
 

Yay for you! I think my mom is coming to the next alumnae function with me. I still don't really know anyone at school and I think she appreciates that I have Gamma Phis who are there for me.