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Wake Forest Chi Omegas Relinquish their charter
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I just read that whole post and I feel so sorry for those poor girls. :( How sad.
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It is sad. One of my high school friends is a sophomore Chi Omega there. She really enjoyed it. They were definately one of the top chapters on campus.
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Statement Concerning Charter Surrender
By Zeta Lambda Chapter of Chi Omega Ken Zick, vice president for student life and instructional resources 9/5/03 he University administration was informed today by the president of the Zeta Lambda Chapter of Chi Omega that the group has surrendered its charter to the Chi Omega national office. This action was taken by the local chapter after a visit by five national representatives this week. During the week, the team of national officers and staff members had met individually with chapter members and advisors. The national team met with the group on Wednesday evening to inform the Chapter of the decision to place the group on social probation. National representatives met with administrators on Thursday to share the results of their inquiry. The inquiry arose from a report to Chi Omega national at the end of the spring semester regarding an alleged violation of the national’s Policy on Human Dignity and Hazing. The national organization has a responsibility to investigate such reports. The University was not aware of such a report and was not notified of this week’s campus visit until August 27th. Administrators met on Friday with Chi Omega national representatives and the former president of the Zeta Lambda chapter to explore possible alternatives to this situation. This discussion did not result in a change of outcome. We lament the decision of the local chapter to surrender their charter. The Chi Omega chapter at Wake Forest has a strong history of solid academic performance and community service. The sisterhood has produced many campus leaders, in all areas. University staff members will meet with former members of the Zeta Lambda chapter early next week to answer questions arising from the closing of the Chapter. The University understands that this is a difficult time in the history of this group and seeks to provide assistance with transitional issues |
I got about a sixth of the way through that post before I got so uncomfortable with what I was reading I stopped.
I felt that what the poster wrote was inappropriate for a sister of Chi Omega. I'm not saying she's a bad sister; I'm saying, from what she wrote initially, her alliances clearly lie with Fideles and with her *chapter* sisters. Her frankness and descriptions of quasi-ritual events and clear disrespect for Chi Omega nationals made me feel like it was disrespectful for me to keep reading the post. |
Wouldn't these girls be considered Chi Omega alumnae? Normally, when a group loses their charter, the members go alum.
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This really broke my heart. :-( I hate the fact that the consultants seemed to take pleasure in the whole ordeal. I've dealt with people like that -- THEY SUCK!
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Her descriptions really rang true to me - my chapter was local for 102 years before we chartered with Gamma Phi Beta, and aside from a few dates, we've lost all contact with Nulli Secundas/the Athenaeum Society. It seems like these girls had done a good job blending the two groups. |
I agree, but I also think there's a certain amount of Chi O bashing going on, which is certainly not cool.
Sounds like they did do a good job blending the two, but it also sounds like they were basically trying to be members of Fideles AND Chi O at the same time (reference her comment on "Wake decided that.... for insurance purposes...." NOT, "going panhellenic was a great idea, because X, Y, and Z.") Isn't that like trying to be an ADPi and an AOPi? Both great groups, and I'm not saying a woman can't divide her sympathies -- but, there's a REASON we have rules against that. |
This is tough. On one hand, this woman seems to have some amount of sorrow that they lost their Chi-O charter. On the other, she freely admits to breaking the National rules and the law. And says she would continue to do it. And if Nationals doesn't like it, tough luck. It's the way it's always been. It's that attitude that flies in the face of this woman's pleading.
If the consultants really were smug and smirking, it's a sad commentary -- but we're hearing those descriptions from a young woman who certainly has an ax to grind, it would seem, with the sorority. We weren't there and don't know the whole truth. Clearly, it would seem that the university felt good about the chapter. Is that because the chapter really was that good (while admitting to breaking the law, etc.), or was the school asleep at the switch here. As regards parents being legally responsible, that is probably true whether the women signed any paper at all. There was a thread on this topic here on GC recently. Parents have been held responsible for their children's actions -- as have chapter advisors, house corporation members and national officers for the misdeeds of undergraduate members. There must have been a reason for this "investigation" to have been staged. Can a national organization allow a "rogue" chapter to make it's own rules and live by it's own decisions if they are in direct opposition to what the other chapters are expected to do? I have a huge amount of respect for Chi Omega nationally, and it will take more than the writings of one member who has openly admitted that she broke the rules to change that -- no matter how badly she feels she has been personally wronged. If someone can offer proof that these women were somehow treated shabbily, I'll be happy to change my mind. But the evidence would have to be pretty convincing. |
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I do see the Chi O bashing also, I just hate to see a chapter closed for something that doesn't appear to be, in my opinion, a good reason. |
This is so sad :(
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Those girls were no more Chi Omegas than I am. If they weren't willing to incoporate the ideals, ritual, and policies, they never should have petioned to join them.....they only did it because the university made them. They may have had great sisterhood between them but they weren't willing to become part of a much larger sisterhood. They obviously didn't care enough about Chi Omega to do the work to retain their charter. I have had first hand experience with the chapter of my GLO that I advise for in a situation where it was on probation. The university also had no clue what had occurred internally to warrant a visit from national officers. But there was just cause and several women's memberships were taken. The remainder of the chapter had specific things they had to accomplish before it was decided whether or not the chapter would keep their charter. The women worked together and even though it took a year to get back in good standing, they did it because they valued their membership and wanted o keep their chapter on campus. While it's a shame that Chi Omega is no longer at Wake Forest, it doesn't sound to me that they were really there to begin with. |
That just made me cry :( It's so sad, and I know I would have been really sad if that happened to my chapter or even another chapter here on campus.
I really feel like the 'probation' terms were *extremely* harsh on the chapter and that is most likely why they walked away. Someone mentioned earlier that they felt the poster was 'inappropriate' for Chi Omega, but I don't really see how that is. While the poster plainly admitted to breaking some rules on alcohol and what not, I don't see how that is any different than coming on GC and writing in the Chit Chat forum stuff like "OHMYGOSH WE GOT SO DRUNK LAST NIGHT!" or whatever and having your letters in the signature (like many people do). While there probably are chapters out there (whether they are national, local or non-social GLO's) that follow every single rule and guideline to the 'T', realisitically speaking, I can almost promise that there are probably even more chapters out there who don't follow every single rule and guideline to the 'T'. I'm not saying it's OK, but that's something we should all work on. We shouldn't "crucify" this poster because she admitted her chapter did some things that were wrong, because I'm almost certain every chapter has at least one person who doesn't follow every single rule. ... however, that is just my .02 on that issue. My heart really goes out to those girls. To me it sounded like no matter how much they loved the Fideles, they also loved Chi Omega very much, and I felt like their punishment was a little unjust. (of course I'm just basing that on what I've read about it) doubleblue&gold mentioned "they obviously didn't care enough about Chi Omega to do the work to retain their charter" umm.. did you SEE the list of stuff they had to do? that puts a *tremendous* amount of pressure on everyone.. attendance, and especially putting the liability of the entire chapter on the exec board's family. all other probation terms aside, this iteself is A LOT, and a little bit scary. |
Coming from a situation where many members of my chapter are currently questioning whether we agree with one of the policies of my organization, I can see where this girl is coming from.
Questioning whether your organization is doing something right (and in the Wake Forest Chi O's case, it sounds like they were definitely doing some things wrong, not that they were the only ones) does not mean that you're not a true XYZ. It means you care enough about the organization that you want to make it better. In this case I think they just realized that their aims were too different from those of Chi O's to work out, and it was probably for the best that they separate from them. As much as we'd like to believe it's true, none of our organizations are perfect. |
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that is so so sad.
i disagree with the people who are saying these girls weren't loyal Chi Omegas... bear in mind, you're reading her journal. while not neccessarily private, i dont know how exactly it came to be posted on here - we don't know if she meant for so many people to be reading her thoughts and feelings on the issue. she struck me as very upset and just trying to work through how she felt about the issue. that's what journals are for, right? working through your feelings. also, i got the impression that she wrote that entry VERY shortly after all this happened... just because she is upset and feeling betrayed by something that obviously meant a lot to her. give these girls some time to sort out their understandably conflicting feelings about Chi O before you go and say that they aren't loyal to their organization. when i read what was required of them to keep their charter, it made me so sad. you can't honestly keep a chapter under conditions like that. can you imagine the dilema of telling people that during rush? hey, join our chapter, but we're basically going to HAVE chapter and that's about it. i mean, people want to have sisterhood, but they also want to have social events, and formals, and have the option to skip chapter if they've got work to do. we had a chapter on our campus that was on social probation during one year, and when some of my friends joined the house and found out, they felt like they had been lied to because they didn't tell them during rush. but they stuck it out because it was only one year... but "indefinite"... that's tough. sorority is supposed to be a learning experience, but it's also supposed to be fun. anyway, i do hope that something good happens for those girls... |
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I hate to hear of any chapters closing, no matter which organization it is.
Hmmm...you know, my cousin was a member of the Fideles back in the 80s...sorry, that was kind of random. :p |
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I think that this is so sad and i dont think the girl is out of line at all for POSTING HER FEELINGS!! My heart goes out to the Chi-Os! |
So, I don't know how any of my other sisters will feel about me posting, but...
My chapter was on probation the sememster I pledged (there was an alcohol related incident that involved the university). The terms were very close to what the Wake Forest ladies were given. We survived while continuing to be a top chapter on campus, and we are still a top chapter today (some 5+ years later). That's all I really wanted to point out. It can be done. As for Chi Omega Nationals, I have nothing but respect for them. We haven't gotten to where we are with a bunch of evil, sadistic women at the helm. As for the Wake Forest girls, I do feel for them in this time. I hope they all come out of this with a majority of wonderful memories and sisters. I'd also like to thank everyone for being pretty reserved and nice in their posts. But do please remember that no one but the collegians and national reps in that room will ever really know what happened - regardless of what you "hear" or even read. |
I find her journal entry sad, but cannot help wonder if there is more to the story. Underage drinking happens within the Greek community and outside… It is COLLEGE!!!! If the reasons they were put on probation are accurate, then almost every chapter in the nation would have to be on probation. Why were they singled out? Also, it seems that many groups at Wake Forrest have had allegations raised and been put on probation for violations that vary in degree. Apparently, these societies were PUSHED into affiliating nationally (from what I have heard.) It has not been a smooth transition, even though it has been over a decade (from what I have heard.)
During lunch at the hospital one day, we were discussing Greek Life, a young lady in our MSN program, was rather negative on Greek life... Of course I had to know why and questioned if she even tried sisterhood.... Her answer surprised me... SHE was a PI PHI!!! I invited her to our brunch at the Blues Club the next weekend... my invitation was not warmly received... not because of me, but because she really did not feel the wine and sliver blue. Alicia received her undergrad at Wake Forrest, where after hanging out with a group of ladies her freshman year, she joined their society. The sisterhood of Strings... All societies were later TOLD they were to affiliate with a National organization, at some point during her junior year, Strings became Pi Phi. According to Alicia the transition was not easy and the new structure/rules took some getting use to… She never felt a connection to Pi Phi, though she is a sister. Interestingly, she speaks very fondly of Strings. |
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As stated before, we did not receive all sides of the story and I bet there was more to the problem besides underage drinking. |
Just a note for anyone who's not already aware--
If your chapter commits any kind of risk management violation, violates the alcohol policy at the local or national level (allows underage members to drink alcohol, has an open keg, etc--whatever the rule might be) and someone is injured or killed: 1. The nationals of the sorority can be sued 2. The local chapter can be sued 3. Individual members of the chapter, particularly executive board members, can be sued 4. The families of sisters can be sued 5. Chapter advisors can be sued THIS GOES FOR EVERYONE. If your Panhellenic hasn't done "Something of Value" or a Mock Trial recently, I highly recommend that you do. It is scary to think, but with a few small mistakes you can be ruined. My Panhellenic did a mock trial last year enacting this and it was very upsetting. So, what Chi O nationals wanted this girls to sign was actually pretty standard--it was probably just having them acknowledge something that's already true. Don't believe me, you can do the research. It's totally true. That said, I don't know much about Chi-O at Wake specifically (I live like 30 minutes away from Wake at home and 4 of my best friends from HS go there), only that they had one of the best reputations on campus--known as being southern, classy, popular, etc. I have also visited the Pi Phi suite there and they seemed totally into Pi Phi, not Strings. So I'm not sure how that plays out for other chapters. I also know KDs on campus (doesn't seem to be an issue for them, either). I know that Wake was expanding with ADPi (Theta left my freshman year after only being on campus a few years--Wake had been involved in sort of a chapter cycling--new colonization followed by small numbers and eventual shutdown) this year or next year, so we'll see what happens. The Pi Phis I spoke to seemed very sarcastic about the chapter cycling, etc. They thought Panhellenic should be a little more cautious in its expansion tactics. All in all, the Wake situation seems very complicated to me. FYI, Wake has: Delta Delta Delta Kappa Delta Kappa Kappa Gamma Phi Mu Pi Beta Phi |
All I can say is, if you (national sorority you) are coming into a school where groups are having nationalization forced on them, I will not say don't do it, but don't be surprised at what you get. If you're the girls in that situation, and this is the only way you can preserve your sisterhood, you will do it. Teaching history and passdowns are fine, but it sounds as though the national officers in charge at the time of their Chi O colonization actually gave them too much leeway. Start as you mean to go on.
FWIW, here's a story I found of Dartmouth's Theta chapter that turned into a local...Epsilon Kappa Theta. They had some potentially dicey ritual-type stuff on it, so I edited. The main upshot is that while there were policies they disagreed with, their main reasons for leaving were ideological. The History of Epsilon Kappa Theta In the early 1980s, Dartmouth's Sororities were much different than they are now. Only a few female houses existed on campus, and those limited their pledge classes to 25 or 30 women every year. During this time, a number of new sororities were formed by women who were not content with the options open to Dartmouth women. Among them were the predecessors of Sigma Delta, Kappa Delta Epsilon, and Epsilon Kappa Theta. The 1984s called themselves CONS (Committee to Organize a New Sorority) and established a provisional organization according to Dartmouth's guidelines. At the time, only sororities affiliated with national organizations were formally recognized by the college, and CONS choose to affiliate with Kappa Alpha Theta. KAT is the oldest sorority in America, and Dartmouth's chapter was its highly celebrated 100th colony. We were installed as the Epsilon Kappa Colony of Kappa Alpha Theta in January of 1982. The new sorority was visited by national officers, and by sisters from UVM, who initiated the founding class. Since we had no physical building, KAT met in classrooms, dorm rooms, or whatever random space they could fine, including the basement of the president's house! Ritual items and other common possessions were stored in scattered dorm rooms. By the Spring of 1984, KAT proudly boasted to their pledges that they would soon have their own house. Due to the large number of forming sororities, and the lack of college property to house them in, the International House (Brewster Hall) was renovated into a kind of "holding tank" for the new sororities, until a permanent location could be found. In the Fall term of 1984, Alpha Chi Omega (now KDE) moved out of the International House, and KAT moved in. The house presented unforseen conflict in the Epsilon Kappa Colony. Our local advisors were dismayed by our eager use of the house for open parties and social gatherings. The national specifically forbade having alcohol in the house, and severely limited male visitation. The limitation on having male visitors in common areas only (to protect the privacy of our sisters) was especially troublesome for the EK Colony, as Brewster Hall boasted 27 singles, but very little common space. By 1985, EK sisters were beginning to weigh the pros and cons of affiliation with KAT, but votes on our bond to the national showed strong loyalty to the black and gold kite. The creation of minimum standards in 1983 was expected to lead to the derecognition of several fraternities. However, the fraternities managed to pull themselves together, and KAT remained in Brewster Hall until 1986, when the building that is now La Casa opened up. Although KAT was offered first choice of the La Casa building, the lack of a common room and poor location led KAT to reject the small building, and Delta Delta Delta quickly moved in. The decision might have been different if we'd known that it would be 1992 before another house would become available. In 1992, Epsilon Kappa sisters continued holding discussions about the pros and cons of their affiliation with KAT. Common practice up until 1992 was to hide the alcohol when the advisors visited and hope they didn't show up at night. The combination locks on the doors were changed for advisor or national officer visits (to prevent wayward men from walking through at inopportune times), and any alcohol was neatly stashed away. Unfortunately, in the winter of 1992, things took a turn for the worse. A "travelling consultant," an ambassador from the KAT Grand Council came to stay at EK Colony for several weeks. Consultants are recently graduated Thetas, sent to a variety of colonies to help communicate novel problem solving approaches and guide new chapters. The sisters of EK Colony had received consultants before, and were usually able to squelch fraternizing and imbibing for long enough to accommodate them. The consultant who arrived in 1992 was dismayed by EK Colony's abandonment of tradition and ritual...She found our sloppiness with rules and rituals disrespectful to the national. After a short time, EK sisters resigned themselves to her criticism, and she in turn reported the colony to the national. On the return of our officers from spring break they received notice that we were on "double secret probation." Male visitation and alcohol policies were the major components of the initial discontent with KAT, but EK Colony's objections increased considerably with the advice of our last consultant... The consultant and the national were very upset about our editing the initiation ceremony. The EK Colony began to question the returns we were getting when we sent away money to our national, and KAT began to threaten to revoke our charter. We needed a unanimous vote to become a local sorority. One sister argued that the vote was not really to become a local, but whether or not to become a national, coming into compliance with the rules and expectations of the national we'd ignored for years. After several rounds of voting, and many tears, we decided to dissolve our relationship with KAT. We informed them of our decision, and they in turn revoked our charter. Our bank accounts were frozen, and our travelling consultant quickly packed up everything she could find that said, anywhere, Kappa Alpha Theta. Anyone who wanted to become a member of the new sorority had to de-pledge KAT. Many seniors had been Thetas for three years. With less than a month left to graduation, they were asked to give up the national network and support of KAT to join an uncertain fledgling house. Brewster hall was divided into KATs and members of the new sorority, Epsilon Kappa Theta. By the time we moved into 15 Webster Avenue that Fall, the officers of the former Epsilon Kappa Colony had thrown together a new name, new colors, a new pledge, a new everything. Epsilon Kappa was retained from our colony name, and Theta from the national, so we would still be "Thetas." The colors of EKT are navy and maroon. Navy blue is for constancy, faithfulness, and genuineness. Maroon, a deep red, is for optimism and revolution. These colors are opposite, representing diversity in the house which is brought together through the combination of the two colors. The shield of EKT is a shield with a moon and shooting star at the top, draped with ivy and waves. The date of our founding is at the bottom of the crest. The moon is a symbol for a female and also stands for brightness. The shooting star stands for aspiration. The ivy represents scholarship, friendship, and fidelity. The waves along the bottom are a symbol of change and represent the continuous evolution of ourselves. The flower of EKT is the Tiger Lily. This flower was chosen because a lily represents exceptional fairness, and a Tiger is a person of great activity, strength, and courage. Ivy is the symbol of our sisterhood - an ever growing bond linking sisters together where every sister was a new leaf on the ivy. Every May 4th, the founding of Epsilon Kappa Theta is commemorated. Initially called "Freedom Fest," the celebration was renamed "Theta Fest" in Spring of 1997 to reflect at least one KAT alum's concerns that Freedom Fest made the separation from KAT sound more appealing than it was. 1997 was an appropriate year to make the change; it was the 5th anniversary of EKT's founding, the 15th anniversary of KAT at Dartmouth, and the 25th anniversary of coeducation at Dartmouth. On May 4th, 2002, EKT hosted a "Twenty Years of Theta at Dartmouth" party, which brought together many alums from both EKT and KAT. Karen Francis, one of the original '84s and now a trustee of Dartmouth College, was an honored guest and presented the 20th annual Karen Francis award, which has been given in her name throughout KAT and EKT's history. The Presence of both KATS and Thetas at the party, with balloons in maroon and blue and gold and black, signified for many of us a happy acceptance of our house's interesting history. |
Breathsgelatin is EXACTLY right about the liability issues, and this isn't the first time they've been addressed here.
Remember, this young woman has admitted to breaking the law -- not just the sorority's rules. And, again, she said that she (they) would continue to do it. If you want to read a really sobering post, check the one in the Risk Management forum where Lloyds of London refused to honor the terms of a fraternity inssurance/liability policy because the group broke the law which left insurance policy void. That left the liability squarely on the fraternity, advisors, officers, etc. Here's a quote: "My husband spoke with the insurance company rep at the Executive Board meeting of his own fraternity over the weekend. The insurance company did not pay at all. Since the fraternity served alcohol to an underage person, they were not in compliance with their insurance policy and, therefore, were not covered. The negotiations began at $18,000 and ended with the girl's family being awarded $150,000. This amount was paid by the fraternity and/or the parents of individual brothers who may have been involved in her acquiring the alcohol. What was paid by the fraternity probably came from their deductible fund. This should emphasize the fact that just because groups have insurance, it doesn't pay if the group is not in compliance." Here's a Link: http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...n&pagenumber=1 Beyond the seemingly apparant loyalty issues between Chi-O and Fideles, there are some really scary legal issues and dangerout precedents here. Chi Omega may have been in the position of simply feeling they needed to get out of a very bad situation. That's why a lot of Greek Letter Organizations are making the very difficult decision to close problematic chapters. It is a much tougher decision than it appears to be from the outside. I really hate to sound like the hard guy on this, but, frankly I'm not sure Chi-O had much choice since the chapter refused to cooperate. |
I just read the history from Epsilon Kappa Theta's website....
now THAT is a group of classy ladies. Just look at the way they speak of Theta, their history, their involvement in the past. |
I assume you are being sarcastic, HotDamn? I think the post showed disrespect to Theta, its policies, ritual, national officers, and all current sisters who hold true to their bonds of sisterhood!
And let me re-state, the Wake Forest chapter did NOT get it's charter pulled. They relinquished it after deciding they could not adhere to Chi Omega National policy. |
kathy, do you mean me posting it or them putting it online? I don't want to offend anyone...if it does, I'll cut and paste an abridged version. I just thought it was a similar issue.
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Sorry for the confusion 33. I was referring to the EKT ladies but I am sending you a PM...
:) |
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As for the drinking, yes, that is a risk management issue. But really, if you're looking for a sorority or fraternity who doesn't have at least one or two members who have broken the rules that she mentioned, you won't find one. If this group is a risk management issue, all groups are risk management issues. We can't shut down every sorority on every campus. I do realize that what we're reading is slanted, but if things did happen more or less the way she's explaining, I do think the national organization is in the wrong. I mean, if they tried to claim that a candle pass is HAZING -- come on, guys. That's ridiculous. |
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Also, you may think the candle pass thing silly, but remember, when I pledged tests were normal, scavenger hunts fun, and lord knows when people my parents age pledged FAR worse things were allowed and we now consider it hazing. Things change. You accept it and try to make it work, or you decide not to. These ladies obviously did not want to change. And that's fine. It is their decision. But please, people (not S&S specifically!), do not assume our Nationals did this in a vindictive, hurtful way. All we are hearing is the side of a very, understandably, hurt and sad collegian. (S&S - I still think you rock!) |
Owner of the journal
Hello everyone -
Well, someone who read my journal sent me along in this direction so I thought I would come see what was going on. First of all, I am not sure how my journal got up here, but hey - it is the internet. You don't publish anything you wouldn't want your mother to see. Second of all, thank you to everyone for your support - and for your criticism. For those of you who acknowledged especially that this journal was written during a very emotional and stressful time, I thank you for your understanding and open-mindedness. I'm only human - and I do write that journal mainly as an emotional outlet and for close friends and family. Dear Chi Omegas (and other Greeks) - I am so sorry if any of you are offended by what you perceived as Chi Omega bashing or outright disrespect for Chi Omega, for Nationals, and for the sisterhood. Please accept this apology. My words weren't intended to be hurtful in any manner and my sisterhood's loyalties to Fideles do not undermine our love for Chi Omega. I made the analogy in the beginning that Fideles is the foundation upon which we built our Chi Omega upon - there wouldn't be one without the other. It is hard for a sisterhood that doesn't have a local chapter history to understand - as I said, most of my readers are fellow Wake Forest students, so they understand the blending of the societies and sororities. As I read all of your posts - and I did read all of them - I was making mental notes that there were many I would like to reply to and clarify, but I would end up writing a whole other long journal entry (and if you read my journal entry, you know brevity of words is NOT my specialty.) If I can answer anyone's questions specifically, I would do my best to. And lastly, I would like to address one stream I saw come up consisitently. Yes - we did break laws and Chi Omega national policies and yes, it may be flagrantly disrespectful to both the constituion of the US and Chi O to admit that. But I would ask you - can every single one of you, especially as a college student, admit to me your perfection as a human being? I did not confess to these mistakes in order to throw them back into Chi Omega Nationals face - I did it in order to be fair, and admit our mistakes so as not to present myself in any sort of unjust self-righteous manner. We are 21 year olds, we are learning growing mistake making human beings. I don't expect perfection from myself, my sisters or any of my peers. I, as well as my sisters, were expecting punishment and a chance to reform from Nationals (and as far as the true problem goes of why we received our probation sentence it had to do with underage drinking) - we didn't feel the punishment fit the crime. It was up to you to be the judge of that. I've enjoyed reading all y'alls opinions, both supportive and opposed. You all have made very insightful commentary and I'm glad I've stumbled upon this. I am curious as to who the original poster is and how you came across my journal?? Take care yall, Meghan |
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Don't go telling her that! You are going to swell her head even more! bwahahaha /end semi-hijack |
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We ask ourselves why Greek numbers are declining, and I see this as a perfect example. Whether or not we like to admit it, the majority of students do not join GLOs primarily for the philanthropy, the connections or even the brother/sisterhood. They join primarily because they think it would be fun -- specifically for the easy access to alcohol and the opposite sex that we're known for. With the kind of draconian rules in place with some GLOs, numbers are going to decline because we're losing out on our biggest market. I live in the house right now. If I want to drink, I have to go to a fraternity party or a friend's house. My friends who live in their own apartments can drink whenever they want. Even my friends who live in the dorms and aren't technically supposed to be drinking can drink as long as they keep their doors shut. They can have boys over whenever they want, but if I want my boyfriend to come over, I have to kick him out by 2. (And on my campus, that's considered good -- there are some sororities who don't allow boys on any floor but the first floor, ever.) If we have parties, we have to hold them halfway across campus and go hiking around in heels and dresses in the cold, because we can't have them at the house or at a fraternity. At the parties, we can't drink unless we're 21, even though some of us have been drinking for years without incident. And the list goes on. If people are looking for fun, why SHOULD they join a fraternity or sorority? Provided they're social, they can make tons of friends in the dorms. They can party and drink and have boys over in the dorms -- and let's face it, for a lot of college students, alcohol and sex are a huge part of the college experience. For some they're second and third only to academics. And we as Greek members are subjected to many rules that the rest of campus isn't, and we pay hundreds of dollars a year for the privilege. No wonder Greek numbers are declining! Now I'm not blaming the national organizations because most of the time they're just trying to cover their own @$$es. But I also don't blame students for not joining. It's basically a lose-lose situation. Also, Blaine, you know you love me. :p |
Meghan,
It was good of you to post, especially considering that we, as individuals and as a group, have both agreed and disagreed with you. The tone of your post reflects a very mature attitude, and I enjoyed reading your comments and commend you for them. I must point out, though, that while you are correct in saying that there may be no chapter that is perfect, and does not break some rules or the law -- that doesn't change the dynamics. Unfortunately, the law is the law. When a chapter breaks the law, it puts everyone in the chapter organization, their parents and their Nationals at risk. It is my unfortunate conclusion (posted many times before), that it is the "everybody does it" attitude that may foster the final downfall of the Greek System as we know it. I pray that I'm wrong. I fervently wish that things could be dialed back to the way things were when I pledged in the mid 60's -- before the huge lawsuits became the norm instead of the unusual. When the drinking age was 18. When our actions weren't always so serious. In my final analysis, the members of your chapter chose your own course in a number of ways. That happens in business on a more personal basis when a person decides to disagree with a boss or department head and loses his or her job. Been there/done that at an earlier age. I would love to say that I was so right that I would take the same path today. Unfortunatly, I wouldn't. Whether I was right or wrong, I handled it incorrectly. I don't know whether you did or not -- but I do know that your chapter openly broke the rules and laws -- admitted it -- and said you would continue the practice. This is a straightforward reading on my part, and is not meant to point directly at you personally (consider that word to the the generic "you" meaning the entire chapter, please). There is never a single side to any human dynamic, and I'm sure that there were actions from Chi Omega Nationals that seem wrong to you. It wouldn't be fair, though, for them to treat you differently from the rest of the sorority. In the end, unfortunately, all the two groups could agree on was to disagree. That's too bad. I wish you and your chapter the best of luck in the future. |
Hi DeltAlum -
Thank you for the been there/done there - its always good to have the perspective of someone who can look down the road and tell you where the path could lead. As they say, hindsight is 20/20. I concede that "everybody does it" is not the way to go. After speaking with my brother, whos fratnerity went down a similar misfortunate path in the late 90s, it's apparent to me that as a probable liability to Chi Omega Nationals, if they found probable evidence that we were hazing, drinking, etc - it is within the rights of their authority to take our charter away, much less put a probation upon us even if the result was that we felt so cornered we ended up reliquishing it. On the bright side, this isn't the end of the story and we are recovening with National reps tonite to hopefully reach some sort of compromise. I fully hope that both groups can admit their mistakes and that some changes can be made that will lead us to find some middle ground and not have to walk away from something so important to so many people. I think my sisters feel the way the situation was handled has weighed more heavily upon us than the actual doling of the punishment. But from a "strictly business" point of view - I agree with you. From a "from the heart" point of view - well, I am too much in throng of things to separate my grief at the situation of my sisterhood. Que sera, sera. I am sure that the best will come from this situation in the long-run, for both sides, whatever the outcome may be. |
DancinDeac, I want to echo the sentiments of BrownEyedGirl. It definately takes a lot to have to be in the position that you and your sisters are in, and even more courage to share it with us.
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