Alums and Their Children
 

Hey All,

I was wondering what the alums do with or for their chldren, if anything to tell them about their Greek life? Do you engourage them to go Greek? TO go your house specifically? Did you get them legacy things when they were babies or children?

Just curious!

~Allie~

We have talked about Greek life with our kids since they were old enough to understand words! As far as they know, being Greek is a natural part of college, like living in the dorm or going to football games (and going to class... ;) of course!).

Of course, I will not force them to go Greek, but they will know all about it when the time comes. My daughter has a few articles of clothing--in fact today she is wearing a lovely pink shirt with green script embroidery that says "Delta Zeta Legacy" on it. Whenever one of my sisters has a baby girl, I give them a bib or some other keepsake that says something similar. My sis-in-law is a Tri-Delt, and I suspect she would like to give Anna some things with dolphins, etc., but I think she is afraid of stepping on my toes--on the contrary, I think it would be great! Because as much as I want Anna to be a DZ, I want her to know that it is her choice, and the more exposure she has to different organizations, the better!

My son has never had any LXA (his Dad & one uncle are LXAs) or ATO (2 uncles) paraphrenalia, but he knows what it is when he sees it.

Edited, because punctuation is good.

Every lullaby that I sang to my daughter was an AGD song until she reached the age of 1. I think it will work subliminally.. she'll be at an AGD house during Pref and feel warm, safe, secure and will have no idea why! She sees my continued involvement now and asks me a lot of questions about being in a sorority.

Right now, at the ripe old age of 9, she very much wants to be an AGD. I'm sure she'll get a little more rebellious or have less desire to be like Mom as she gets older. I'll support if she wants to go through Recruitment and I'll support her if she doesn't. I'll support her if she chooses a different GLO too. But, I really really really really really really really really really really would love for her to be an Alpha Gam!

Dee

My kids know I'm a Delt. Their grandmother (mothers side) is an ADPi, so all are legacies.

If they had questions, I answered them honestly. I did not attempt to influence them in any way.

Of the two who went to/are attending college, neither chose to join a fraternity or sorority. The oldest is in a Greek Letter academic honorary.

There is nothing wrong at all about telling your kinders what Greek Life is about!:)

While I do not have Children, I consider ALL of the Guys at my Chapter as surrogates some what!:D

Legacys have been shown two times on GC, one the Younger Foos at UG and PDT, and by justamom whose son was a 4 legacy young man.

One went with his legacy when he did not get a Bid, Boo On SN for that and one who went LXA on his own.

The important thing to me, is at least they went Greek!:)

Legacys do not gauarntee a bid. Each Indivdual has different thoughts than a Brother, Father or Grandfather. Each Chapter is differrent!

I tell every young person who comes into the Store, I hope you look at and go LXA, but if not right, at least think strongly about becoming a Greek!:)

No kids here (yet) but I'm planning on talking to them about what greek life is all about and how being in a sorority has benefited me. If they then decide it's not for them, I'll be disappointed but I'll respect their decision. Same goes for my hypothetical future daughter if she joins a sorority other than AEPhi - if she's happy in another GLO, I'll be happy for her.

Oh, I like the lullaby idea. We have a couple of pref songs that would make great lullabies ;)

I've known far too many legacies who were cut by their mom's or sister's sorority to fall into the trap of only talking about Pi Phi. I taught the kids Pi Phi songs, I wear my letters--but we talk about GREEK around here.

CARNATION, Carnation!:)

PM me to let me know of situation at S C. No new Updates!:(

Re: Alums and Their Children
 

I have three sons, and my husband is not Greek by his choice. I've talked about my sorority involvement and the boys have watched (and when appropriate, participated!) along with me. Heck, I was pregnant with my youngest while a Chapter Adviser and he came along with me to functions until he outgrew the confinement of a baby carrier.

I also sang AOII songs as lullabies, they wore "My Mom's an AOII" tees when younger, and I hope when the time comes each of them considers Fraternity Membership. We've got about 5 more years before I'll start the "Carnation Nation Consider Fraternity Life Program" :D

I have a niece who's a sophomore in High School. I have toddler photos of her tucked in my bed with one of my AOII sweatshirts, surrounded by pandas. I've told her ever since she was a child that if she went to college, I'd pay for her sorority membership. I truly don't know if she'll be attending college, but if she does I'll hold true to my promise no matter which sorority she joins (but oh how I'll want her to be an AOII!)

Re: Re: Alums and Their Children
 

what a great aunt you are!!!!

Even though I'm not Greek or an alumni of anything but high school, I have influenced my 12 year old neice :)

Let me put it this way, she knows her Greek letters backwards and forwards, and asks me all the time about fraternities and sororities :) Heh..a lot of influence from me and TKE209 has hit her hard :) I've already told her that wherever she attends (she has her eyes on Duke) that she should at least rush. So, she's ready.

Oh, DZ's..she's fallen in love with you. The turtles got her!!

Hahahahahaha...... how much I love the subliminal lullabye! How delightfully sneaky!

Great thread, by the way, to Miss Allie.....

I'm going to say, and try so hard, to influence my kids to rush. I feel like you can't truly know you *don't* like Greek Life until you get a taste of it, and realize there's sister/brotherhood in there along with all the stereotypes. So I'm going to say I'll encourage and support my daughter if she rushes and decides to go GDI, or local, or panhellenic.

BUT OH IF SHE'S A PHI MU.....

I have no children, but my niece looks up to me as if I'm her sister. I've never really pushed AXO, but she likes the idea of Greek Life (her mom's an AKA) and talks about how she's going to join my chapter. :) She has had nothing but positive exposure to Greek Life, which is all any of us can ask for. I've asked my sister about whether or not she wants her to go AKA--for both of us, sorority life is more important than the letter, and GDI is just fine. :)

As for me, I can't imagine any little Munchkins wanting to go Greek, especially if Mr Munch is their father. :p If anything, the factors that encouraged me to go Greek won't be there for them.

When I have children, I can't wait to tell them about Greek Life! My parents weren't Greek and I had never really thought about Greek Life until some of my friends pledged. Then I couldn't wait to be a part of it! Of course it would be great if my daughter(s) were Delta Gammas but I wouldn't try and influence them to go that way... I'd just promote Greek Life to them.

dzandiloo, that "Delta Zeta Legacy" shirt sounds cute!

I sing Alpha Chi songs to my girls too! When I was a recruitment advisor I took them to a few bid days. I have told them about why Alpha Chi is so important to me, and that one day I hope they will join a greek organization when they go to college.

My daughters know a lot about Delta Zeta and what it means to me and they have had their share of "DZ Legacy" items! But I also have a sister in another sorority and several good friends in yet other sororities so they have many good role models to look up to and that makes me happy :)

If they want to join Delta Zeta, that's great. If they want to join another sorority, that's great, too! Either way, they'll still get tons of letter goodies and a big bouquet with the appropriate flowers sent to their dorm rooms on bid day. The only difference, I guess, is that if one or both goes DZ I could conceivably be there for their initiation (mom gets all mushy and pauses to wipe away a tear)

My 6 year old did tell my husband and me a few weeks ago that she couldn't decide if she wanted to go to the Naval Academy like Daddy or if she wanted to be a Pitt DZ like mommy. Oh well, she has lots of time :)

Ahhh! My future daughters are definitely going to have as one of their first outfits "Tri-Delta Legacy" shirts or jumpers of some sort. A girl from my chapter who's parents are UCLA alum came home from the hospital in a "Future Bruin" outfit. Now that she actually goes there, she has the picture on her door...I want my daughters to have a picture like that if and when they go Tri-Delt! No...honestly I will be happy if any of my future children decide to go Greek since I has such a positive experience.

Never a big deal in this house where "legacy" was concerned.
Everyone KNOWS I love that my kids did decide to persue Greek Life.

One thing that kind of worries me about nudging kids to their legacy is this-

If your child is a legacy to a strong, highly regarded GLO on the campus of their choice, I think MOST of us would like to play the legacy card. Yet, if their legacy is small or struggling, we probably wouldn't expect or push our kids to "take" THEM!
We don't like it when our child falls victim to their legacy deciding our child isn't right for THEM- double edged sword!
Eventually, the legacy factor may become rather meaningless, especially on the larger Greek campuses.
For that very reason, I never did talk up AXO (not on campus anyway) or SX too much. It always fell within the realm of going Greek.

One of my wonderful Kappa sisters had one of her earliest memories of her mother singing "I want to go ADPi, boom boom..." to her in the bathtub.

When she went through rush, the ADPi chapter at our campus released her before prefs. She was actually a bit relieved that this happened, since she didn't really feel that the chapter was a good fit for her. Her mom, on the other hand, had a really hard time that her legacy hadn't had the opportunity to pledge.

Although I don't have kids, if I ever have a daughter she will be dressed in blue with lots of blue bows. And I will try really hard to remind myself that my choice shouldn't have to be hers too. What's of value is the experience of being Greek, regardless of the letters.

Very true.

Although I knew there was very little chance our son would rush, I visited the Delt House when I took him to the campus at the beginning of his freshman year.

Being a division officer, I knew that the chapter was having some problems with the Central Office -- even though it was/is one of our bigger chapters.

While I had a very pleasant chat with one of the brothers who happened to be at the house, and while the facility itself is very impressive, my talk and a look at the shelter, composites and other factors pretty well convinced me that our son probably wouldn't fit in well -- even if he were interested.

As we all know, different chapters of the same fraternity can vary greatly from school to school.

This comment is NOT meant to be an indictment of that particular chapter -- I simply mean to point out that one particular kid would probably have been out of place there.

I never sang Sinfonian songs to my son as lullabies, although we did sing fraternity and school fight songs in the bathtub. Now my daughter, however -- I often sang the Phi Mu Alpha sweetheart song to her as a lullaby. Still do, in fact.

Ms. MysticCat and I are both Greek, and it has meant a lot to both of us. We certainly are and will be positive on Greek life in general and our own groups (and those of others in our families) in particular. I'm sure my wife would love to see our daughter be a Kappa, and I would travel hundreds of miles to be there if my son were ever to be initiated into Phi Mu Alpha. But most importantly, we wouldn't want them to go Greek unless it was the right fit for them. Same is true of being a legacy, especially for my son. No point pledging a special interest GLO just because you're a legacy.

I definitely don't want my daughter to feel pressured to go DZ or end up heartbroken if she goes to a school where DZ cuts legacies heavily (I don't think that's a problem anywhere in Texas). Plus, if she ends up going to school where she says she is (yeah-she's 5...I know this could very well change), there is no DZ chapter for her to choose. I have not sung any DZ songs for her though....

Fortunately, there is an ADPi & a DG working for the after-school program she attends, and they wear their letters all the time. I think they were impressed when she recognized the Greek letters & told them she would be wearing some of those someday too....

Andi, that's adorable -- and for her to recognize the greek letters is impressive!

GC has definately convinced me that if my daughter pledges just about anywhere, it'll work out OK -- she'll have a great experience just like I did.

We should start a thread to see which parents were able to be present for their son/daughters initations, and what it meant to them.

Yeah, now if we can just get her to recognize the letters of the alphabet she will be using every day, we will be on a roll!

teke209sweetheart, did you ever think about trying Alum. Int??

Just check Alum thread!:D

While I have no kids of my own yet, I am a camp counselor in the summer, and tend to wear a lot of Kappa gear - as well as making Kappa-inspired arts and crafts (like fleur-de-lis out of clay, and light blue and dark blue gimp keychains...) and my campers definitely noticed - they had a bunch of questions about sororities (especially my oldest campers, they were 12 to 15 and really starting to get interested in college life) - it was really exciting talking about how wonderful sororities can be to a group of girls who haven't really heard all the negative stereotypes and stories yet - hopefully it will keep their minds open!

Also, one weekend when parents were dropping off their kids at camp, I saw two women wearing sorority shirts - they didn't know each other, but went up and hugged one another and talked about what schools they had gone to and their experiences - it was so cute!

my parent's only rule was that i had go through recruitment. i didn't have to pledge anywhere if i didn't thing it was right for me. they just wanted me to keep all my options open and find out what greek life was about on my campus. i come from a heavily greek family so i've known about the benefits of greek life from a very young age. i think that will be the rule if i have kids, "you have to go through recruitment to find out what it's all about, but you don't have to pledge"

I love that rule. I think I'll instigate it in my family, too.

The thing is, though, if you're going to mandate your kids rush, you have to be prepared to PAY for rush!

My son has a bib that says "an AGD loves me"

I've sung AGD songs to him since he was in utero

My grandmother is a Chi O, my mother is an AOPi, my Aunt is an AOPi and my uncle is a Pike.....there are some other various greeks in there as well. I'm not going to pressure him to go greek at all. He will however know that his mother is greek and PROUD!


of course now that I'm pregnant again, I'm *crossing my fingers* for a little legacy!!

congratulations!!!!!