Ghetto acting interests
 

A friend and I were talking last night about a certain college in our area that we feel is truely the epitome of "ghetto". There are Greeks on that campus as well and we were discussing about what their informationals might be like considering the school. Greeks have you ever had people show up to your informationals who you knew there was just no way they would ever wear your letters by the way they carried themselves? What are some absolute no no's that you have seen or know you would not allow to pledge your beloved orgs. ?

I agree with DeltaBrat that we need a little more clarification as to what's meant by "ghetto". But on the whole, in my opinion, all that matters to me is that you know that there is a time and place for everything. Greek org's don't seek to change people, we only seek to bring in people that have our aims and goals in mind and who are ready to do what is neccesary to achieve those aims. If a person is a certain way that we see as negative, the only thing we can do is make it known to them, and then act as positive role models for them. Hopefully, they will take our lead and be fully ready for all that our org's call for. As far as definate "no-no's", my only one would be disrespect for oneself. Because when it comes down to it, if you don't respect yourself, I don't see how you could ever FULLY respect my Sigma Gamma Rho.
Yeeep Out!
SoloRHO
***PEACE: Proper Education Always Corrects Error***

when i think of ghetto, i think of loud rowdy behavior(very unbecoming for a young lady) or a certain mind set - ex you don't take care of your responsibilities(bills & children) but you hang out at the club etc. personally, i really don't see those type of people wanting to do community service anyway

I'm with Deltabrat on this one. Why do you refer to the behavior you described as being "ghetto"? I know unrefined, uncouth women who grew up in the suburbs. I also know sophisticated, well-versed women who grew up in the so-called ghetto. I understand that the term "ghetto" has come to be synonymous with any behavior that is distasteful, but I still cringe when I here it. To me, it's as worse as using the "n" word to refer to one of your friends. Maybe you should rephrase your question and rethink the implications of what you're asking. I think you just discovered one of the "no-no's" on your own.



[This message has been edited by SkeeBunny (edited July 11, 2000).]

Ditto skeebunny,
Having lived in the "ghetto" all of my life, it hurts sometimes to hear the word used when reffering to unladylike behavior or behavior not becoming of a gentleman. I know many poeple in my neighborhood (ie myself)who are nothing of the kind. But anyway, that being said, my feelings on the question are already posted, so I'll just hear what others have to say.
SoloRHO
PEACE: Proper Education Always Corrects Error

I apologize if I have offended anyone with my choice of slang. I was raised in the inner city myself. And I am not offended by the use of the term ghetto...cause you know what? there are all types of ethnicities that reside in the inner city, it isn't just person's of color, so i don't take someone using the word to describe someone's behavior to be synonymous with the "n" word. But being that my experience and beliefs aren't going to apply to everyone else I apologize to those who took offense.

Now what I am asking is, since not everyone who is interested in being greek, becomes a greek, have you ever met someone that based on the way they have carried themselves you knew just was not going to be in your org if you had anything to say about it. For example a girl/guy that was known for being loose or was always seen drinking or smoking marijuana? Or the girl/guy that couldn't put a sentence together if it didn't consist of curses? The girl/guy who whenever a fight kicks off is bound to be in the center of it....People plege orgs for a variety of reasons and community service isn't always the first that comes to mind...this person may just want some letters and be caught up in the social aspect of it...have you ever come across people like that and if so what happened?

oh is that what ghetto means? The behavior you described comes off as immature or just ignorance maybe? I do not know about that "ghetto" description though. That term was originally used to describe the way people of color act. So regardless of what it means to you, it still is one of the many degrading terms used to describe my people. I have heard it used describing other races, but only in a mocking matter............. I am sure that personality does play a part in ones chance in being chosen into a sorority or fraternity. Greeks always tell us that just because you have the grades, service, and college credits, that does not mean you will get in. So one would have to assume that your personality would def. play a big part in your acceptance.

Can you please explain what you mean by "ghetto"?

In my sorority it isn't about how a person dresses, except for some exceptions. If we asked for dressy attire and that woman kept on showing up in sloppy workout clothing, then we would definately have a problem. However, we do judge the character of the woman. If she appears to be uninterested or not motivated whatsoever, then that is someone who wuold not be asked to join. Of course, generally someone who dresses completely different from the women in my sorority might be looked at with much more scrutiny to see if her ideals and likes are the same as the women in the sorority. our rush lasts for a month so it gives us a while to actually get to know these women and know who will be a sister and who will not!!
AEPhi Forever!!!
beta gamma pledge class, we were rockin from start to finish!!

actually the term ghetto refers to back when the jewish people were being persecuted in europe and they were forced to live in restricted areas, aka "ghettos." I don't believe anyone is trying to place a correlation between people of color and the term b/c ghetto areas are not in the best condition so they are trying to call the person as cheap as the area. I am totally not offended seeing as though i am a person of color and i did grow up in the south bronx projects! It's ridiculous the way people quarrel over such miscommunications.
DPhiE
NYU

Regardless of the origins of the term "ghetto", we all know that over time words may and do take on "new" meanings. What is offensive to someone may not be offensive to another. Unfortunately, the term ghetto has become mostly associated with people of color and has been known to describe attitude, behavior, or mentallity. Although I understood the question put forth, I too, was put off at first by the choice of slang used.

When I hear ghetto, I just think cheap or crappy.. I don't think of any people of color. My roommate was one of the first people I heard use it and he's asian. I think he used it referring to a video game that he bought that sucked.

------------------
Steve Corbin
Lambda Chi Alpha
Theta Kappa Zeta Chapter
Rose-Hulman Inst. of Tech.

Thank you for putting that so eloquently, Soror. I wasn't even going to bother responding to that one ...

Steve Corbin,

No matter what you believe the term "ghetto" to mean, it is offensive. I've also heard whites, Asians or other ethnic groups use the "n" word when talking to their friends. Just because the word has been accepted as a slang term by the general public, doesn't make it any less offensive. Regardless of the origins of the word, the fact remains that the "ghetto" is made up of primarily people of color. Using that word to describe uncivilized behavior insinuates an air of superiority and suggests that people who are raised in the "ghetto" don't have good home training. It is just not true.

I'm big on analogies, so maybe this will help you understand. Since you are Greek, I'll put it in Greek terms. What if everytime someone got pissy drunk, others would say, "that is so Greek of you". Isn't that unfair? Or if someone had a really low GPA and others said, "that is so Greek". Would that bother you? I think it would because it is a sweeping generalization of how all Greeks are.


[This message has been edited by SkeeBunny (edited July 12, 2000).]

Like I said earlier, words take on different meanings to different people. As a member of the black community and where I live, that is what the term "ghetto" signifies. Everyone's definition may vary. Therefore, what is not offensive to you is offensive to me.

Ok I think we pretty much figured out that some people take offense to the word ghetto while others do not. I am the one that originally used the word in my question , I already stated that although I don't find it offensive I understand that there are those who do and I apologize for offending anyone...The reason why I used it was not intended to be offensive...it's a slang word I hear in everyday language by all types of people...and have never met anyone that took offense to it until now. I definitely don't feel like reading about the word ghetto for the next 30 post, so let's end this conversation right here and now, as a matter of fact forget the whole question I don't care for an answer right about now. Thanks anyways.

allright then!!! I case you didn't notice, but this forum is open for everyone to respond to whatever. Just because you are finished that doesn't man that the discussion is over.Just don't check out this subject again! Ciao!

TrueGreekLove,

I suppose you are always free to delete your own topic.

TrueGreekLove,
Now my feelings are hurt because you knew exactly what you meant when you posted it.
HOW CAN YOU CALL A WHOLE COLLEGE 'GHETTO'?

I am a highly educated, well respected lady in my community which is a ghetto and it is also the area I grew up in. I didn't go to a "ghetto" college either. I am a teacher who gets highly offended when I hear other teachers talk about how "ghetto" students are from my neighborhood when they don't know that is where I live also. Actually, I have found that some of the most ignorant, disrespectful students are from the most affluent areas.

I think your topic is a good one. I suggest you repost it and use different terminology. I am sure you will get more positive responses!!!




------------------
BE POSITIVE!!!

So now everyone wants to pretend that they've never used the word ghetto? Come on! To answer the orginal question, yes, there are certain mannerisms and speech patterns that would turn me off from a prospect, but in the old days, I would have gently corrected their grammar and/or behavior. Since now that could misconstrued as hazing, I would probably just silently observe the person to see if any more redeeming qualities presented themselves, then make my judgement/perception call.

[This message has been edited by Discogoddess (edited July 14, 2000).]

DG>>>>I was scrolling and scrolling and scrolling, waiting on somebody to say it....

WHy is err'body acting like they never heard anyone say someone was ghetto? I mean ya'll had to wait for her to elaborate before you were willing to answer her question??? Why, If you watch a comedian, and he says I hate ghetto women, or I had this really ghetto girlfriend, I doubt that the joke would go over your head!!! You all know exactly what she was talking about. Like some chick with every other tooth with a gold cap, or green weave in her hair, or 3 rings on every finger, or the girls in any given Cash money video, need I go on??? Come on..Keep it real!!

I agree with one of my SF's who said that words sometimes take on new meanings...when she said "ghetto" she wasn't talking about the projects or what have you...she was talking about ghetto mentality. And you don't have to live in the projects to be ghetto!! Sometimes people can be entirely too sensitive...if you live in the ghetto that's fine, but if someone says someone is ghetto, that is not a slight against you or your personal character...like I said, we all know what she meant when she said ghetto.

Ladies, and gents, have a phenomenal day...
Peace and hairgrease!!!

Discogoddess,
Thank you for taking the mental thoughts right out of my cranium!!!!!!

Onesavvydiva, Thank YOU for telepathically extracting my thoughts and laying them down in this here forum! Yall know what she's talking about! Those chicks with the big 1986 door knocker earrings, wearing the Goose down bubble jackets with dress shoes/boots, with the 3 hair styles in one. Yall know...them no perm having females with the bone straight weaves walking around as human billboards for Tommy Hilfiger, Guess, etc. GHETTO...40 ounce drinking, a.m.-p.m. weed smoking, Ordering "Scrimps" or 4 chicken wings and french fries at fancy restaurants chicks....NEED I CONTINUE?!?

As an answer to the original question, yes, there are some young ladies that would have to go a long way to prove to me that they have (recently) learned how to present themselves with class and style before I would be excited about offering them membership. It's not about being "hip" or "IN style". It's about knowing as the chair of a formal event that when they show up, they won't be in a skin-tight mini with a lepord print tube-top. It's about knowing that when we say "white dress ceremony" they don't go out and get a wedding dress.

This has nothing to do with this topic (sorry), but DPherlove, you are the first dphie I've seen on this site: I am a dphie from UBC http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Dag! for a minute there I thought I had left the planet! For a minute there I thought I grew up in a part of Brooklyn NY that maybe only we used the term "ghetto", that maybe only my television set somehow connected with a strange satellite signal on B.E.T when the term "ghetto" was used...For those who truely understood that no foulness was involved in my use of the word...thank you *whew* I guess I didn't drop down on the earth from another planet.

And if Sha nay nay is the epitome of "ghetto" imagine a school full of Sha Nay Nay's and you will see why I called a school "ghetto".(By the way I am an educator myself, so there was definitely no foulness meant by that statement) Regardless, like I said, the whole conversation steered to the left awhile ago and by than I didn't even want the answer to my question anymore.

I don't think there was a problem with my original post asking her to elaborate. She said an entire college was ghetto. Dang...that's alot.

I would have preferred her to have elaborated the way Sexy Mocha and onesavvydiva did to be honest. Hell, keep it real and we all will. That was funny.

To answer the question, yes there were women I'd seen that I felt would have to do a lot to prove that they KNEW how to represent themselves and the Sorority appropriately. Many functions require a bit of public speaking, introducing speakers, etc. If her favorite introduction to others regardless of their status/position is "Whaddup neeeeeya" or she wants to incorporate the "crip" walk into dance routines (which could be step routines)...that's a problem.

Yes, I think we all knew what the young lady meant, but asking her to elaborate wasn't a crime, I don't think. And because it is a public forum, I want to make sure we don't misrepresent ourselves as a people. Just like to person who referenced the n***** word. Some of us say it, but that doesn't make it right...it's still a form of self-hatred MOST of us are guilty of. We laugh at ourselves so it doesn't "feel" so bad (as I did when I read the examples), but it is still destructive.

Ok ... yes, I know what ghetto means, but I STILL find it offensive. No matter how mainstream the word has become, I don't use it and I would prefer not to hear others use it. I refuse to refer to insubordinate behavior as the mentality of people from the "ghetto" (mostly, my people). I am not ignorant to the fact that this is a word used in a joking manner, but to me, it is not funny. It is another way in which we degrade ourselves. Again, using "ghetto" is analogous to using the "n" word to refer to one of your friends. Just because everyone uses it, does not make it any better. I'm not trying to be overanalytical. To each his/her own.

For those of you who said I need to lighten up, maybe you need to dig a little deeper.

[This message has been edited by SkeeBunny (edited July 14, 2000).]

If the word "ghetto" offends anyone on this board, then let me be the first to apologize for my insensitive jokes...I just find the subject so dam funny. Have you guys read the book by Shawn and Marlon Wayans...I think it's called "You Know You're Ghetto When...". It's hilarious! It's particularly funny because I'm guilty of committing more than 1/2 of the ghetto acts in the book. Like putting batteries in the freezer to "recharge" them and taking the batteries out of the smoke detector to put in my walkman, (not just ghetto, but dam dangerous as hell!) I also do not (and never have) owned a dust pan, we use mail, newspaper, etc. to pick up the trash. I have a can of reusable bacon grease on top of my stove (always), my furniture is covered in plastic, and I've used the dish detergent as bubble bath and tussy deoderant BUT...I have learned to laugh at these things and to NOT dig deep into them. Actually, until I read the book I didn't think these things WERE ghetto. I do, however, know the appropriate way to look and carry myself in public. This, I think, is the difference between the average Joe and someone that's ghetto fabulous. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/wink.gif

I agree with you. I think that when I am just talking with some friends especially childhood friends I do and many others of you too http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif play the you know you ghetto if game. So I personally think that this has went a little to far to personal. (but like I always say, thats my opinion)


But yet again I guess I might be a hypocrite, because I really feel like when someone who doesn't even know what a Ghetto is comes up and says that someone is ghetto is really out of place and then again I personally know that there is a time and place for everything and I feel that you should know that. I am often said to "act white" (still haven't figured out what that is.. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif)when I am at work or school or out in a particular place, but I just feel that I know were to do what.

But I have digressed so far and if you haven't already decided to just scroll through my jiberish, this is something for Mocha and all you others out there who won't be offended. (I am sorry if I do offend anyone, but I can only be myself)
But anyhow Mocha this one is for you:
(ignore the numbers....their wacked)

You know it's a GHETTO hair salon when . . .
1.) Your stylist accepts a 3pc from Popeye's as her tip.
2.) All the stylists walk around with house slippers on.
3.) Your stylist is still there doing your hair even though she's supposed to be on bed rest.
4.) Four people are booked for the same 1:00 appt.
6.) Your stylist calls YOU at the salon talkin' bout "I overslept but I'm on my way".
7.) When your stylist finally arrives you can see that she had been to the club the night before because she still has on her club clothes, and she still has the red "over 21" stamp on the back of her hand.
8.) Every hairstyle, no matter what you're getting, requires that nasty brown gel.
9.) There's always that one stylist in the back that you can't tell whether it's a girl or a guy.
10.) The STYLIST'S head looks a mess.
11.) All the other stylists fake like someone else's client's hair looks good until they leave the shop and then its "Girl, I KNOW Shameeka ain't let her walk outta here like dat!"
12.) There's a receptionist's booth at the front of the shop but no one ever uses it because it's stocked with beauty supplies.
14.) There's a hustler's car show outside of the shop every Saturday afternoon.
15.) Some crackhead is always coming into the shop every five minutes trying to sell some deodorant or batteries.
18.) You get to the salon and your stylist isn't there, so you gotta page her. When she calls back, you gotta go pick her and her baby up.
22.) They got strawberry, orange, AND grape in the coke machine, but no coke.
23.) Your stylist stops doing your hair to go outside and talk to her baby daddy.
25.) Your stylist holds a 15-minute phone conversation with somebody while she styles your hair.
26.) The tape man is there selling bootleg tapes for $5.
30.) When they send Boo-Boo's baby girl to the 99-cent store to buy your $10 "deep conditioner".
31.) When the stylists boyfriend comes in the shop with his boys and you are just hoping that they hurry up with your hair before there is a drive-by.
32.) When for a finishing touch your stylist insists on sprinkling a little bit of glitter in your hair.

Sorry this is soooooooo long, but Mocha got me started

I feel everyone's comments and yes, I read the Wayan's book and it was funny. I only asked because she said the "college" was ghetto. The whole college. I was asking what she meant. The people at the college were ghetto (see onesavvy comments)or the college itself. Were the windows boarded up? Were there bars on all the windows of the college? Barbed wire? What?

I agree that we should be able to laugh at ourselves, but there are many who find that degrading ourselves is detrimental to our upliftment. Especially seeing as how the stereotype is that ghetto people are people of color.

sexy mocha,

girl........you are killing me!!!!

i think that shanaenae (martin) is the epitome of ghetto.

ok about this college let me describe it so some of you know what I meant by ghetto. Yes there are boarded up windows, the admissions and some other administrative office aren't in buildings but in trailers. The security at the front gate only does there job if it isn't raining, whereby they would let jeffrey daumer through the front entrance. And, some of the security guards have hair that is fit for a hair show, all types of crazy colors, gold teeth with the name pookie engraved in them, long flouresent pink nails. Some of the offices and computer classrooms have a screen door in front of the office/classroom door. You know the kind you would see at a person's home. The yard isn't maintained at all, when you go into the human resource office they can barely find where they keep their job applications, that's if you can pry the secretary off the phone long enough to help you...Now the student body is whole other issue...think about what it would be like to go to school with Shanaenae and her whole family! The dorms look like projects rather than student housing. Now all of this and more is why I called the school "ghetto"

Well I am sure that most of us have used that term before. There is a time and place for everything. Even if we all use it hat does not make it any less offensive. I mean you know the term "nigga" do not offend some people and it too has taken on a new many to some and it is used as a sort of slang. I never use that term and I have taught my children never to use it also. They have learned to never say the word ghetto when they are referring to a person and how one might act. Just because it can be offensive to some and you never know who may be around if you use the term to loosely. If it is okay where she is to use it the word then thats cool. Still we all have to be cautious about terms of this nature, because if she wanted to pledged xyz sorority and they over heard her using this word in that way one of them just might get offended. I am sure she or anyone else would not want that.

blu,

you have just described ALL the hair shops in philly. this is the worst, what about when they eat over your head. see thats why, i'm go to jersey to get my hair done!!


true,
damn!!!!! what school to do you go to?

Now let's just use a different term for ghetto. When I was growing up my mom and grandma would use an expression like "low-class". That's a bit less offensive, you think?

Thank you DeltaBrat for always, always saying what I feel but can't articulate. And my Soror Blu Theatrics -- thank you for giving me the laugh of the day. IT'S SO HARD TO FIND A DECENT HAIR SALON!!! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Blu theatrics,

Thank you for my first laugh of the day! Now, I know for a fact that you don't live in California, so I'm just trying to figure out how you know what the salons are like in MY community! That was hilarious because of the recognized familiarity. The fact that most of us have experienced the things listed is most amazing to me.

TrueGreek,

Is this the school you attend or where you're employed? That's pretty sad.

[This message has been edited by Wynna (edited July 15, 2000).]

Bu_theatrics, You are killing me!! That post deserves a Big ass LOL!!! You described every beauty salon in Brooklyn!
Delta Brat, Windows boarded up?? Barbed wire? You guys are a riot! I don't know if you were trying to be funny with that post, but I found it funny as hell! What's funnier is that you were almost right about the school! I'm with Her_Story, What school DOES TrueGreekLove go to?!? What are the requirements to get in like?!? I can only imagine. I think Low-class is a more appropriate term but I bet if everyone started using that it will eventually replace ghetto but it will take on the same meaning. Thus, becoming offensive as well.

Blu_theatrics- I almost choked from laughing when I read your post!! The sad thing is you know that a lot of those are true. Especially the ones that have to deal with keeping you waiting!

ZetaAce

I don't attend the school I described, When I first moved here, I was looking into grad schools for an education program, it just so happened this school has one and I went there to inquire ...needless to say my mouth droped when i got there. Since than I have been to several greek parties there and have been on the campus several times for meetings and yes to even inquire about a job...and each time I went, I found one more thing to add to my list. The most recent was my encounter with human resources....I certainly don't mind using the term "low-class" if that's less offensive to everyone.

Oh and by the way I wasn't worried about using the term "ghetto" around xyz sorority. I have several friends and family members in various orgs...both fraternity and sorority and they all use the term "ghetto". Besides, if I am not yet a member of xyz sorority I would conduct myself in a business like/professional manner, we all know that there is a time and place to use slang, whether you are seeking membership in an org or seeking employment, you know that these are not environment's where you would act and carry yourself as if you are around your home girls. Enjoy the weekend everyone!

What about when somebody who doesn't know you, or has never even met you, continuously calls you "Boo"...I called the cable company the other day to report a problem with my service, and the girl on the other end keep saying stuff like, "Hold on Boo", or "Try this and call me back Boo"...GHETTO!!!

But I do understand what the SF was saying...and I respect that. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif I don't wholeheartedly agree that everything, and every slang term has some deep-seeded meaning that is derading or condescending, but I can partially agree, for example...we all know that we have a sister, brother, cousin, that might be ugly/not so smart/not so affluent, and behind closed doors we may crack jokes. I know I have done it, call my sister ugly or what have you(even though she isn't), but let somebody outside of the family talk about my sister, and I am ready to brawl!!! I guess that ties into what the other SF was saying about outside people maybe grouping and classifying what they have no knowledge of.

One thing I know is that black people are some of the most humorous people on earth, mainly because we know how to laugh at ourselves! And I think that's what some of my SF's meant when they said lighten up, not that we should be ignorant to the injustices that DO go on, but that we shouldn't be so eager to make an injustice where there isn't one....

Laughter continues to be the best medicine

------------------
'Cause I'm a woman,
Phenomenally
Phenomenal Woman
That's me

Maya Angelou