DARK/LIGHT...SKIN COLOR.........Is this still an issue? Let's be honest Sorors & SF'
 

Is this an issue? I was in the mall a few days ago and a nice looking brother in his late 30's maybe early forties approached me. (Very nice looking Sorors) Any whooo, we were in engaged in a little small talk and all of a sudden I lost my hearing,,,,,yes I went absolutely deaf. I just could not hear pass the words that left the lips of this fine, well built 6"5 about 210 "dark-skinned" brothers full lips (beautiful white teeth). The words Sorors & SF's were......."You are so pretty to be sooo dark." I still cannot believe that. Is it written some where that dark-skin sisters are biologically challenged, where beauty is concerned? Is it an unwritten law/belief that beauty is only among the white/prit near white?

Surely this is not still an issue!

Deja

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TO WHOM MUCH IS GIVEN....MUCH IS EXPECTED.

To answer your question deja, yes you are biologically challenged. God forbid you are a reminder of Mother Africa http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif. Sista I am being sarcastic here but that just shows you that somethings have not changed. I am on the other side of the spectrum and I remember one time at a club with my girlfriend and she said in so many words that if SHE were my complection she would be getting numbers and invites to the dance floor. I was p***ed to say the least. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/frown.gif It makes me sad to here about stories like yours but it is also true in many cases you the lighter you are the more accepting you are. Just look at BET for example. The VeeJay Rachel is fair skinned very appealing to the eyes because she is light. But the chick couldn't interview to save her life!! Now Big Lez who is a much more down to earth woman and has far better interviewing skills gets put on Rap City which if I remember correctly comes on later in the evening. This situation is sad. I personally don't have an answer to it. This brother definitely has some issues http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/frown.gif and unfortunately the higher up you go in your career the worse in can get. All you can do is be strong within yourself and pray those who are in that land of confusion. Peace

Deja,

Been there, girl. It can be truly shocking when this happens. Epecially when the brother is dark-skinned himself. HELLO!

I once had a guy tell me that his mother would have nothing to do with his kids if they were dark-skinned. Sad....really and truly sad. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/frown.gif I have heard mothers tell their children to come in out of the sun because they don't want them to get too black. God forbid!

I could go on and on. Like they say, as much as things change they still stay the same. Like Darling1 says, we just have to continue to be strong and pray for the "confused" ones. We are all beautiful in God's eyes. Believe that! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif

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Sincerity, Loyalty, Unity

Unfortunately, this kind of stuff will continue for years and years. If it's not the light/dark thing, it's the good VS. bad hair. I am light skinned with what would be termed "good hair" that is wavy and down the middle of my back. What question do I always get? "What are you." Now I am not mixed with anything, both of my parents are black. But before people find out, they always seem to be intrigued by the fact that maybe i could have a little something running thru my blood other than black. I think it all goes back to how for as long as we've been in this country, we have been made to feel like black was not good enough. So this whole light/dark complex that we have will not go away until somehow we can realize all of the beauty that comes with being black, no matter what shade we are.

Deja, you are not alone. I get that all the time. I've actually had a white male teacher tell me that I was a pretty dark-skinned girl. If I'm pretty, what does being dark have to do with it. It's something I've just learned to except, but it has also made me favor pretty dark-skinned ladies...I guess because I feel the need to take up for 'my kind.' The media doesn't help the situation at all. All you see are bright skinned girls with long hair. I even notice dark skinned famous people gradually getting brighter and brighter. I just don't know what the deal is?

I am a dark skinned sister and I am GLAD to see brothas date light skinned women. WHY? because atleast she's black. The problem is getting so bad that my light skinned, long hair 1/2 black 1/2 white friend got pushed on the dance floor because a brotha was trying to get to a white girl who wasn't even cute. The situation is so bad that she is even sick of them dating white women and her mother is white.

I don't have a problem with people dating outside of their race...however it is becoming an epidemic with brothas dating white girls. You see it everywhere.

So when I see a black man (positive) with a black woman (dark or light) I get over joyed and wish them lots of luck.

Hmmmmmmm.......I never really thought of it that way Anydaynow. Good point. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

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Sincerity, Loyalty, Unity

Soror Deja,

Yes this is still an issue...and I have to deal with it right at home. I would classify myself as brown-skinned (between light-skinned and dark-skinned) my husband is dark-skinned. My oldest daughter is my complexion (who is almost 5), my baby girl is my husband's complexion (who is 3). My almost 5 year-old child is corrupted. Because of what she hears on the playground at daycare, she has called her sister black! Well needles to say my reaction was pretty strong. Reflecting back it was probably too strong. With kids they will always continue to do the one thing that gets a strong reaction from their parents.

Anyhow, I'm still struggling on how to deal with the issue...I need help on how to enlighten my oldest daughter, and how to ensure my youngest grows up with confidence and does not feel second best. By the way, both of my daughters are very pretty (and that's not a mother's bias talking! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/wink.gif )

Hello Ladies!!!

Taykimson: I am sorry to her that your child's mind has been corrupted at such a young age. It really is sad. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/frown.gif I don't have any children but I would say explain to your child that yes her sister is Black but so is she. They're just different shades of black. Explain to her that black people come in all kinds of different colors and the differences don't make anyone any less/more beautiful, special, etc....

When will we as a race realize that it doesn't matter what complexion you are....you're still black? Nobody (of other races)really looks at you and sees light skin or dark skin they see a black person. We are more color struck than anyone. We are quick to put one another down before anyone else will. That is our main problem as a race. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/confused.gif And as soon as we can free our minds of this type of thinking we will be on our way to a more prosperous future as a people.

http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif On a happier note HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to everyone who is blessed with kids or is blessed with one, two, three, etc...on the way!!!!
sorry for the lenght of my post http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/redface.gif
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"We are each of us angels with one wing, We can only fly embracing each other."

[This message has been edited by CuRiOuSiTy (edited May 14, 2000).]

Unfortunately, Deja, this is still an issue. I grew up in the south where racism was something we encountered on a daily basis. When we are so hated by others, I can't understand why we inflict the hatred on our own. What that brother didn't realize is that his comment was right up there with "You speak so well...." and reflects his true inner feelings about himself.

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>>>"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised... Proverbs 31:29-30

I'm saddened to say that yes this still goes on. I'm brown-skinned, right in the middle. There are times that I wished that I was lighter and there are times that I wished that I was darker because to me I think that they all are beautiful. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif I do this when I see a beautiful light woman or a gorgeous dark woman. They come in all shades. We, as African Americans should br very happy with our whole race because the black race is a beautiful rainbow of brown complexions. We have "yellow sunshine", "red roses", "brown sugar", "sweet chocolates", "licorice black"..even more than that (just can't go into such description). http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/cool.gif Now that ALL sounds good to me. Even though this is NOT the best thing to go back to but....think about the song by WOOTANG. All the delicious flavors of the African American woman. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/wink.gif

Now, on the down side. My boyfriend of 5 years HAPPENS to be light skinned. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/rolleyes.gif I didn't pick him because of that, I was just blessed with his every being. I think that he's one of the most beautiful men in the world, BUT........he made the comment about a girl.."She's cute for a dark-skinned girl." Girls, I went off the hindges with him." "It pissed me off that he said something so stupid." http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/mad.gif I've been bringing it up to the past three weeks because it pissed me off so much. He constantly says that he didn't mean it like that. I'm going to drill his head until I get tired of doing it. Even though we hear these things just think back to what I said.

Some may say that I may not know how it feels because I'm in the middle. But I will correct you on that.. I do BECAUSE I'm black!!! And being black is the single ingrediant that we need to come together and do what's important. That's all!!

And to the mother with the son issue...just keep teaching him. You will see what his final conclusion will be. And that is .... what his momma taught him! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Well said gypsy.


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>>>"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised... Proverbs 31:29-30

Ladies I have heard that slanted compliment all my life (adult life) I was a funny looking little girl, thanks to those BIG purple glasses my mommie made me wear!!!! but that is another subject (I am currently in therapy for http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

Anyway it is sad that brothers actually think they are paying you a compliment when they say that! I am pretty because of who I am don't qualify my blessing!!! I have a very ignorant cousin who when her baby was born would not hold her beacuse she was of a darker hue. Her first child was of a ligher complextion. She indicated that she was not use to "a dark child". Some stuff I can not even internalize it is too painful to deal with, I just shook my head. Now the baby is 5 years old and her mother is constantly slicking her hair down, dressing her up and trying to do whatever to "make-up" for her darker complextion. I see what she is doing and it is sad. She use to do my hair and would frequently comment "you sure are a pretty Chocalate thang" My reply was always the same, "Liz you are one ignorant thang." Girl just roll with the punches life deals some interesting blows! But, this is an issue which will not go away, God loves me and is very very good to me, what people say about me means nothing!!!

I already posted on this subject on the Cita thread, but dang i hate it when Brothers say stupid stuff like that to me. Like i said in my other post, some people are trying to lighten their family tree thinking it will end thier suffering as black people, but it won't. The madness will only stop when the masses put an end to this warped mentality. But i'm beginning to think that some people don't want it to end because it benefits them. We as black women can have three children each completely different in skin color, so it would seem that all of us would want to stop this self hatred because eventually it will affect someone in our family, if not our children, theirs.

Hello ladies. This is a topic that gets me riled up every time. I hope that I dont sound too radical. The complexion issue is one of those issues that were put into place hundreds of years ago (by whites slave masters) to keep us divided. Lets not forget that the lighter complected,mixed race slaves were "houseslaves" while the darker complected ones were "field slaves". This was a technique used to keep the race divided so as to avoid revolts. This issue is one of the major self perpetuating complexes that we as black people buy into. It is sad that "we" are so cought up in skin color when there are so many other more important issues for us to deal with as a race. Lets talk about economics, crime, injustice...
I've heard children express the same things as mentioned above. My nieces and nephews came home saying that my mother is choclate and I am vanilla. My nephew told me that he like vanilla girls. Of course I gave him a long lecture on the issue. My mom had an exprience with a brother from her church. He is a dark complected man who is a single father of a really dark complected father. This man is the center of the attention of many of the single sisters in the congregation. Do you know that he had the nerve to say that he wants to marry a light complected woman?!!! My mother said to him "Well if every man felt the way you do, then your daughter will never find a husband. What do you think of that?" He was dumbfounded of course. I just think that it is a deep rooted issue that will be hard to change on the national scale. It is sad.

I just thought of something positive that I would like to share on this issue:
Freshmen year my friends and I were trying to weigh the options on which sorority to join. I hadn't been exposed to Greek life prior to this so I kind of based everything off of what my friends had to say. Two of us were light skinned, the other two dark skinned. Well my friends all seemed to think that we light two should be AKA's and the dark two should be Delta's because that is the way things are. But that spring when their new lines came out, there were more brown/dark skinned AKA's than Delta's and more light skinned Delta's than AKA's. I just remember being very relieved. I guess the point is that, no matter what people may have felt at one time about skin tone, educated people have sense enough to put all of that aside. Now we just have to sit back and wait for everyone else.

This has truely been an exciting topic to read. One we are of one but with so many different ideas and beliefs.

No matter our hue, we are all Sorors. Now that is beautiful. Oh, yes, and big hugs to my SF's.

Deja

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TO WHOM MUCH IS GIVEN....MUCH IS EXPECTED.

TTT/bump of very old thread
 

I decided to kick this one up in view of this news from the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:
Applebee's settles color bias complaint

By TAMMY JOYNER
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
http://www.ajc.com/business/content/...rch0808opt.jpg

A former Applebee's employee who said he was harassed by his black supervisor because of his color has received a $40,000 settlement in an agreement reached between the Kansas-based restaurant chain and the federal Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

The lawsuit, part of a rare but growing trend of intraracial harassment claims, was resolved through a consent decree filed with the U.S. District Court in Atlanta. In addition to paying Dwight Burch, who worked at the Applebee's in Jonesboro, the company must provide anti-discrimination training to its workers.

Burch said he was called derogatory names by the store manager because he is dark-skinned. The manager is light-skinned. Burch said he was fired when he threatened to report the store manager's behavior to Applebee's headquarters in Overland Park, Kan.

Applebee's spokesman Frank Ybarra said in a statement that the company admits no wrongdoing and settled "to clear the way for the sale of our restaurants in Atlanta to one of our franchisees."

Burch joined the suburban Atlanta restaurant in December 2000 and was fired in March 2001.

"I am grateful that the EEOC filed this lawsuit, not just for me but for other workers, too," Burch said in an EEOC statement. "No one should have to put up with mean and humiliating comments about the color of their skin on the job."

Color bias filings have risen from 413 in 1994 to 1,382 in 2002.

"It's an important case," said Robert Royal, EEOC regional attorney in Atlanta. "People don't realize color discrimination is [covered] under Title VII. It affords protection not only to African-Americans but Hispanics ... and everybody of color."

The Associated Press contributed to this article.

I am glad that article was posted because some of us have been lead to believe that color preference was instituted by the slave master during slavery and that white America then left it alone. That simply is not true. Color preferences are used every day in corporate America. It is probably more common that name-profiling.


Just survey the scene you will find far more A.A.'s in high corporate positions of light to brown skin tones.

My mother, who is "light" by almost ALL standards, but was treated differently as a child because she was the darkest girl in her Jennings, LA native family, has openly told me she would not be where she is today (VP of a major bank/investment firm) had she been darker. My mother doesn't even consider herself light, but she is the color of Tracy Ellis Ross. Her sister is about the color of Vanessa Williams and always got the preferential treatment.

When discussing why her boss, a black male, was a Senior VP and she was not (she has an outstanding record...over a million in sales last year) she said it had to do with his sex (banking is a big boys club) and the way he looked. He is VERY fair with the requisite wavy hair. She said while the face of corporate IS changing (SLOWLY) they just still lean towards blacks who look like them.

So while our self-hatred is depressing and infuriating. Please don't be deceived, even in 2003, it is not only self-inflicted.

Lawd!
 

At least I know now that it isn't just me!!!!

I have been told that I am "pretty for a dark skinned girl."
What the heck does THAT mean?!?

My son is fair-skinned, and people assume so much about us. My boyfriend is darker than him, but lighter than me, and if we go out, people automatically ask him questions about my son (how old is he?) and direct comments to him (oh, he is so cute). And I have to push him aside to say, "4.. and thank you!" The same things happen with my lighter skinned friends. They ask or assume that his father is white (ummmmm.... naw.). We as black people should know that we come in all colors and not assume stuff like that.

Once, a white lady came up to me and said, "Oh, your son is such a pretty color." She expected me to say, "thank you." I just looked at her as if to say, "Soooooooooooo..... my color is what?"
It is a trip.

People still do care.

Color and pledging?
 

As far as BGLO's go, I think most stereotypes only exist in the minds of non-greeks. (AKA's are light skinned, Delta's are dark skinned, Kappa's are light skinned, Alphas are dark skinned, etc.) I can only think of a handful of campuses who still use the paper-bag test. Very few care anymore. Greeks are always in the forefront, aren't they?!? :)

Funny thing is was I was in the bookstore and I was about to pick up the color complex and I said nah I think maybe we have come a little farther since that was written (Sometimes you give people too many compliments) :rolleyes: Well being dark skinned myself I grew up with a lot of issues about that and I had to get over that! I think our people still take that seriously until we see more darkskinned women on TV and a more broad based spectrum of people of the African descent then the whole complex will never change!

Re: Lawd!
 

Thank-you so much for saying this...I have experienced this more than a few times:rolleyes: and it pisses me off to no end!

When my daughter was born she was VERY light-skinned, everyone looked at me then looked at her--I sarcastically said her father was white, then they would say "oh that explains it" ;but, I would laugh and say her father was light-skinned. The killer part is they would say oh she is so cute but then turn right around and say she looks just like her daddy---even though I've been told she looks just like me but lighter....:rolleyes:

I just completed a feminist class, and this issue was one I found very hard to explain to my white female counterparts. America is still shielded with the concept of race.
But ya know even today color is still an issue...it's so sad :(

Thanks for posting this. For years, I thought that the dark/light skinned issue always slammed women in a disproportionate manner, as you alluded to when you mentioned that we need to see more darker-skinned women on TV, etc.

Soror,
I can honestly say this plays a great part in self esteem. Growing up darkskinned in America can be difficult for both men and women. Rarely do we see positive images of both sides of the fence even today. BET plays into that in their original programming!

@ ST, this was a very interesting article! Do you think it would apply to my situation? Actually, I was very heated when I wrote that HC this morning, I have calmed down considerably. I talked to my Auntie about it and she said that maybe I shouldn't say anything. I have basically chalked it up to ignorance (on her part of course), but I still don't feel comfortable (actually it burns me a bit) that she is so incredibly uncouth. Honestly, now that I am sitting here writing this, there have been occasions where she's made little inuendos about me going to RN school and "being so proper", and that makes me uncomfortable. I guess she may be jealous because I am trying to do something with myself, but I think sometimes she just does stuff for shock value. I really need to think about this before I proceed, but I do want to report it, (at the very least, it is just inappropriate), I am just weighing who I should report it to first. The first person that I actually SHOULD report it to is the ER RN Manager, but like I said, she is their little 'mascot' so I may have to take it elsewhere.

It might apply to your situation. I would check with the HR people at your hospital, too. If it were me, I'd report it. She needs to keep her tacky comments to herself.

As an aside, it seems like your co-worker is putting her lack of self-esteem, etc. on you. Classic crabs-in-the-barrel syndrome. :rolleyes:

Re: Re: Lawd!
 

I had the same problem with the brat when she was born. What kills me is that they act as though they're giving you a compliment by commenting on how pretty their light skin is , or just how much they look like a white baby...WTF?:mad: :mad:

I also feel it's stupid of them to say........"Oh she must have gotten her color from her daddy":rolleyes:

Does it matter? I mean we're beautiful no matter what shade we're in!!!

You know, what's sad is that Pastor spoke briefly about this on Sunday. He was saying that basically: My blessing is not predicated upon your failure. This is not a see-saw world...you don't have to go down before I can rise up. We do this, I don't know why! :rolleyes: Everything that I am blessed with, God will do the same for you! Don't hate on me, just get YOURSELF on point.

ETA: I don't think that her comment this morning was so much directed at me, but it just made me uncomfortable. (I just wanted to clarify for someone who pm'd me last night :rolleyes: )

Even though her comment wasn't directed at you, your reaction to the comment is what's important. Same thing for sexual harrassment, it's not just what was done or said (directly or indirectly), it's also a person's reaction/comfort level with it.
I must agree, she is facing some serious self-esteem problems here, and she' projecting them on you.

Re: Color and pledging?
 

Please, please, please tell me you are kidding about being able to name any school that still uses the paper bag test??? See this is one of those behaviors and obsessions that we as Black people have that I swear is pathological.

I am light, bright and damn near white in complexion. I used to go to bed as a child and pray that i would wake up any color darker than what I am. It took a long time to get over that.

As far as color and BGLO's- you would be amazed how many people who try to guess my affiliation say "you look like an AKA." It is definitely still out there that light skinned, long hair = AKA. I think it is such a disservice to the members of both organizations. It infuriates me.

Unfortunately it is still an issue. I even heard my grandmother say "She is real BLACK but she is pretty". WTF is up with that!?
If I had a dollar for every time I was dissed for being dark (I am one of the darker ones in my family), I would retire! :rolleyes:

Come on! Our community has other serious issues to deal with besides this BS!

You would think that we have after all we have been through we would have gotten over this...
This type of racism happens to me every single day. If I have to hear...." Your so nice to be light skinned" I just might slap someone. I remember the first time someone ever said this to me... I was baffled... what in the hayle does my complexion have to do with my attitude??? Not a Dayum Thang!
As far as greek life goes... this is still prevalent. But not in the quantity that it used to be. My chapter was comprised of nothing but darker skinned ladies...so my LS and I stood out like sore thumbs. But that didn't deter us any... nor did it matter to a Sorors. We are all in it for one common goal. And our complexion can never effect that...

You know I've had the same thing happen to me over and over. You would be suprised how much I had to fight as a child because of a stupid complexion issue and because I came from a two parent household, sad but true. When I was younger, I met a girl up the street and we hit it off. One day we were in her kitchen eating and she said she never thought we would be friends and I asked her why. She told me "I just didn't think you were that cool." Years later in college I've had people to say Afrochic, you cool peoples because we thought you were one of those "stuck up red girls." I've also gotten the "you look like an AKA" comment more times than I can count.

When I was in college I would style hair in the campus salon. There was an older lady (50ish) who eventually became my regular customer. One day we were chatting about women who have been in the cosmetology industry for years. She knew a lady who had varicose veins from the constant standing for years in a salon. That woman looked at me and said, "I wouldn't want to be as light as you because if you got varicose veins, you can see them, and that would be ugly." WTF?

Another thing I can't stand is job interviews. I have a name that you wouldn't know the race until I step in the door. I don't think white people mean it, but some act as if they have never been around a black person before who can speak English and dress in business attire. Sometimes they act as if I'm the spokesperson for the entire black race. One day I went to an interview and I was at the head of the table while a good seven or eight people in the company interviewd me. One white lady told me she wish she could tan and get my color because she turns red when she tans. She also wanted to know what hair color was in my head because she liked it. And the other lady said my God look at her teeth, they are gorgeous. I felt like sideshow damn bob up in that piece on display. What in the hell did any of that have to do with the job? How long have we been in America? There are a wide array of hues in the black race. Why is this an issue?

I've also gotten the comment, "Are you mixed with something?" And I say yeah, two black parents. Many people do not realize how ignorant their comments can be. But why do I remember the sarcastic and hurtful comments from childhood until now, and I'm 28 years old? Racism outside and inside of our race is alive and well. By the looks of it, it is not going anywhere anytime soon.

Sad but true
 

That ranks up there with "you are pretty to be big" or "you have good hair"

Huh????!!!! I am visiting family in Jamaica and it is a serious issue here as well the paper had an article about it because all of the Miss Jamaica have been very light to med. complexion and 'coolie' meaning "good hair" or a person who looks mixed. The reporting was commenting on how sad it is that the beautiful sisters who are darker are discouraged from even trying to compete! And this is an entire island of people of color!!???

:confused:

When I was an adolecent and going through it on this issue I was really upset over people asking me if I was mixed. My dad, (so cute) trying to make me feel better told me to tell them yes, I am mixed. East and west Baltimore. It still makes me laugh.

I have heard all the ignorant comments from "I thought you would be stuck up", "You think you are cute cause you're light," (Side note- no, i think I am cute cause I'm cute!!) From a white classmate -"I could almost forget you are Black," (DON'T! WTF!! That is supposed to be a compliment?) "if I wanted to date someone that light I would just date a white girl," "he is only dating you cause he really wants to date white girls," etc. Wake up Black people wake up!

Well,
 

A good friend of mine who I worked with back in 10 A C was convinced that I was biracial because I'm fair and have fine hair (that some would consider "good," but I digress. :rolleyes: ). I simply showed pictures of my parents (mom's fair, my late dad was dark).

I understand that intraracial discrimination exists, but I just think it's a waste of energy. Let's worry about improving education and securing economic opportunities.

I think it is an issue for those that are insecure about themselves. If anyone of you watched the movie "Queen", it is a great example of how this type of insecurity was embedded in most of our ancestors years ago. Queen - (Halle Berry) was allowed to stay in the house, dress nicely ect, while our darker skin generation picked cotton and lived in poor conditions. What I learned from the movie was that, even though Queen may have had an advantage back then in many ways because of her skin color; she still ended up with the same negative effect, when times got bad.

It is unfortunate that some of our ancestors passed this on that it is visibally affecting us in the 21st Century.

Re: Re: Re: Lawd!
 

No, it shouldn't matter ;but it still happens to me to this day. My daughter is considerably lighter than I.

Now being from the South, I have found that what Northerners (West and East included) describe as light is not the same where I am from. For instance, Jada Pinkett would be considered as brown to some but light where I am from.
Although, most people I knew didn't care what color you were as long as you were pretty. :rolleyes:

When I was younger, a guy I was dating (a jerk) once said in a conversation I overheard that he would marry a light-skinned girl and only f*** dark ones. Well I guess you know I told him where to get off!

But it used to really bother me and I would pray often that my daughter didn't experience those same prejudices.

My husband and I just had a discussion very similar to this (black men marrying white women and the reasons why--another issue another thread)--my argument was and still is that we, as an Afro-American community, have a social responsibility to enlighten, require, and demand that the face of the A-A female community is not just some chick with "slightly" dark skin with very "thin" features or some BBW with a hearty voice selling Pine-Sol. My color, or ANY woman's color should not set the standard for what's beautiful but should expose our blackness as merely existentialism.

I'm what some would call "light-skinned", but my roomate is dark. People are always telling her that she is cute to be dark skinned, and while she thinks nothing of it, I find it offensive. She is a very pretty girl and her skin color should not defined her beauty.

In another case, a guy I met at the movies told me that he would not have approached me if I were a shade darker. I don't know what kind of line he thought that was, but I politely left him standing there looking like the fool he is.

But on a lighter note, I have a "thing" for dark skinned guys:D