always want what you can't have
 

Does anyone else have such a crush on someone that they know that they can't really have (bc they have a girlfriend or whatever). There is this guy that I go to school with and he is so cute (spiky type hair, really good dresser, fraternity member) anyway I have liked him for some time and he has been dating the same girl forever. Granted for part of the time I was dating someone but it was off and on, and my bf was actually a friend of my crush's!! Anyway, I have tried my darndest to get this guy and just can't get him...oddly enough my southern charm hasn't worked it's wonders:rolleyes: anyway...is anyone else in a situation like this too that could make me feel bettter?

(Ok, PM baby, ya know I love ya, and theres pleanty of room at the top, but I am thre with you.)

Not only do I shop there, I am president of the company.

Seriously, if my life made a sound, that would be it. Also known as, "Why cant I have what I want?"

I'm a member of this club as well. My fave line guys use is," You're the nicest person I've ever met, BUT I'm not attracted to you."
nothing worse than having a crush on a guy who thinks you are ugly.:(
Sometimes we just have to deal with the hand fate dealt us. Plus it seems like once you have a crush eventually the novelty wears off and you move onto someone else.

I kinda have one too, I must admit. Friend of mine. We flirt occasionally and when we are at the club together we always dance somewhat suggestively. I hate making the first move though and so does the other person. So we are kinda just in limbo.

I think part of the attraction for us is the fact that these people seem unattainable.

That's so true. The minute someone wasn't interested in me, suddenly I was so attracted to him. :rolleyes: What torture!

Luckily, I am over that phase.

There was a comedian on Comedy Central comparing this to a job interview. Something like...

"You have an outstanding resume...All the qualities we're looking for...But, we're not going to hire you. In fact, we're going to hire someone who can't even hold a candle to you. Would it be possible, however, if we called every once in a while to complain about the moron we hired...?"

***

It sucks to be the one everyone considers the "best friend type." :(

I saw this comedian. It was so funny and true.

same thing happened to me. like a a guy a lot. we dated, called it quits but i still continued the crush. (some of you might remember my story.) well i tried to convince him that just being friends was okay, even tho i knew it wasn't hoping he would say he wanted to start things up again. well he didn't and didn't want to hang out with me cuz he thought he would send the wrong msg. so i told him that i would just leave him be and not invite him out anymore and keep emails to strictly school stuff. well, it kinda backfired and now he took it to a whole new extreme and actually insulted me and my crush for him ended. but he still is kind of an ass to me and it is a struggle to carry on a coversation, when about a year ago, we could talk for hours. yeah, so i ruined that one.

now i have a new friend. he and i have been having a weird relationship ever since we met. the first night we went out with a group, i got kinda drunk and he took care of me, cuddled with me, and whatnot. from then on, our relationship was kinda touchy feely even though i would probably never date him seriously cuz he just isn't my type. well at a party we had recently, i wanted to go to sleep when the party was still going on, so he offered his room to crash in. Thought nothing of it and fell asleep. He joined me later and we KISSED! So now our lil strange friendship has gone to a whole new level. I don't think anything will come of it and we are cool about it. But damn... he was a good kisser too.

See... my problem is always monetary. I want the things I can't afford.

LOL, I hear you!

I think I need to join the "this is the story of my life" club. Bah, there was this one guy last year (who I still think is absolutely GORGEOUS) who I was friends with..he was perfest. A hockey player, he wrote poetry, played field hockey (yes field hockey and he wore the skirt to school..that takes BALLS!) and I just...swooned. lol.I ended up telling him that I liked him and he's just like..."Thats cool, I'm glad you told me."

Nice. I still love the kid though...and he has the COOLEST last name. :-p

Why is his last name cool?

because its SCHWENK!! haha, I laugh just thinking about it :-p

That is actually a rather unfortunate last name... poor guy.

i have to say that for the longest. . .i was in the club
i liked this SAE since i had joined sorority
for a year, i would go to all of their parties
and become good friends with his crowd
finally, this past TOGA, i was really drunk and flirting with him
he FINALLY took the hint and made out with me
but that's all we would do is make out
so, before spring break, i went to their paddy o'murphy party
we hooked up again but this time we exchanged numbers
well, he would only call me to come to their parties or gatherings
it wasn't until a month ago that he started liking me
and he talks about us moving in together
he dropped hints of 'wanting to solidify our relationship'
and he gave me a ring
and he says that i'm his girl
however, i was devastated when i learned
that though he's with me every day
he's 'not ready to settle down'
but he 'still wants us to move in together'
and he'll 'decide if he really likes me'

i'm the idiot who still chases him
and tries to make him jealous
but it doesn't work
because he still ends up coming over
and crashing in my apartment
yeah, i'm the idiot

This is also the story of my life. The guy I have the biggest crush on has a girlfriend that's in another sorority. I just have to realize that I will never be able to date him. My sorority is having it's annual date party next semester, and I so wish i could take him. Well, anyway that's how it's going for me.

FSS

Oh, I have a history of being attracted to or having crush on the unattainable guys, even those who I assume are unattainable (don't ask me why I assume this). However, it bugs me that guys I am not attracted nor interested in to try to pick me up? I think it goes both ways.

http://burns.thefinaldimension.org/otn/blobs/multi.gif

Damn....ran into this boy at the mall today. Haven't seen him since two summers ago. Still freaking hot and STILL with his girlfriend of like three years. God damnit...I know he likes me, and I'm sure he knows I like him. Why can't he break up with her and date me?!! But hey he did get my new number, and gave me his (but that's just our regular routine) and told me to come see his band. Hmmm..... do ya think he just thinks of me as a friend???? We went shopping together for like an hour too.....

Sweetie, that guy is no good!!!!! Don't move in with him. He's getting all the action he wants with NO COMMITMENT!! not cool!!

ETA: I just realized that this is from May. Any updates??

I had always thought this Sigma Nu was so cute at the bars, and he was friends with my friends... well one night at the bar we were dancing and he kissed me! I was like whoa, yay, and so after the bar we went to hang out at my friend's place. On our way there, I had met his friend, a guy in Beta. He was really nice and actually ended walking me home that night because we were both leaving at the same time. The Sigma Nu ended up graduating that semester, and we had hooked up before then. So his friend was still around, and I'd see him all the time at the bars. The turning point was when my good friend was like wow, he's soooo cute! And I was like hmmm, I guess I really never took notice because I was all into his friend. Then he'd come to our events, and my sisters would be like who's your friend, he's sooooo cute. Then I started liking him, but then he got a girlfriend. It sucked... not only because he was taken but because my one of my guy friends in another fraternity said she was really slutty because she had been with a lot of his brothers. Anyway, I graduated and over the summer I saw him, and turns out he broke up with his girlfriend... so yeah we ended up hooking up and he told me he had always been attracted to me. My heart melted when he said that.

I'm in a situation just like this! The guy I like has a girlfreind and they have been dating FOREVER. I always in and out of relationships because I just keep a man. Probably because I want this one so bad that no other man is good enough. Anyway I'm kinda shy so I'm not going to make the first move. I think he may be shy too because it's easy to see that we are attacted to each other but we won't really talk to each other. It's a crazy situation.:confused: :(

Not always. Sometimes we don't know they're unattainable, like if they don't wear their wedding rings! Had a huge crush on a new guy at work but was going on a medical leave, not in a position to get involved with someone. I spent my medical leave working up the guts to ask the man out. I struck up a conversation with him shortly after I got back. It turned out he lived a half mile from me and grew up in my subdivision. Our kids go to the same school. I could SWEAR I'd heard him talking about his custody schedule one day to another coworker where he said he had them 3 nights a week. So, as we're talking the dreaded words came out of his mouth "Well, my wife.. blah blah blah". I was so bummed out. Then I had to meet her at a school function! UGH! "It's like meeting the man of your dreams, and then meeting his beautiful wife" (to borrow a line from Alanis). He's so gorgeous, so sweet. His wife is a nurse who works 3-12 hour shifts hence his "3 nights a week" comment. I can feel his presence when he walks into the cafeteria. It's just chemistry. Nothing I can do about it, but I would never act on it. We are friends and he offered to take me to Home Depot to get new bi-fold doors for my closets and I declined. I could not handle it and I knew it! THEN, I'm at a family get together and my cousin says "My husband works in your building now" and it turns out that my cousin's husband is my crushes BOSS. Could I be anymore bombarded with his presence???

He should have been wearing his wedding ring from day one!

Dee

As the girlfriend of one of these "unattainable" guys, I didn't appreciate it very much when some sorority hussy tried to hook up with my bf at a party that I wasn't at. I found out, so I had to teach them a little lesson, and I put an electronically scrolling sign in my window at my sorority house in Greek Park saying...

"Way to go [PNX John Doe]. Way to screw up 3 yrs. Hope you have fun with [DGC Jane Doe] if that's the best that you can do." [Not real glo's or names]

It was great entertainment for all.
Except maybe them two.

Oh well, we worked it out...but she better realize she needs to go for someone who's unattached and back on up. He definetely knows better now.:o

I am sooooooooooooo in the club!

I'm kinda in, kinda not in the club.

I had a crush on my coworker, but I wouldn't approach him. For a looong time. But then he pissed me off, so I got over it, lol.

Now I have a crush on a different coworker. Lucky me he is far from unattainable. He's just so incredibly far from my type that the thought of us together is rather funny.

He = punk band, glasses, green hair (only for one night though, lol and I helped with that so I can't complain)
Me = almost any other kind of music please, far more likely to be wearing Prada (or wish I was anyway :p )

Yes I definitely had a situation like that. I met him years ago but he had a girlfriend the first time I met him. He and I were apparently attracted to one another but knew never nothing could ever come of it. We always had bad timing because by the time he was single I was dating someone and when I was single he got back with his ex. I called it the yo-yo effect. Eventually there came a time when we were single at the same time and started dating. Unfortunately he couldn't handle the distance (only an hr apart...ugh) and found another girl who was closer to him. But he always managed to get in touch with me every now and then and we'd meet up and for me the feelings would come back all over again. He was just sooooooooo yummy...someone my parents would have loved. I just found out a few months ago that he's engaged so there ends that chapter.

Oh my God. I have been the President of the "I Want The One I Can't Have" club for so, so long! Way back in the day, there was this guy who I met on the second day of second semester, freshman year in a class. I fell for him the second I met him. After class I was sitting in the computer lab with my friend, telling her about this hot guy in class when who should send me a BITNET (showing my age here...this was sort of like an IM) message at that moment! It turned out he lived in the same dorm as I did so even though he ended up dropping the class, we saw each other around the dorm every so often and we became good friends. He dated a girl who used to live on my dorm floor for years...they were even engaged for a while. Guess who he talked to about how lonely he was and how much he missed her when she was in London for a semester? Guess who he came to for advice when they had problems? Yep...good old Auntie Rachel. After her, he dated some others...in fact, I always used to tease him that he dated every single female from the Chicago area in the journalism school except for me! You don't know how torturous it was, hearing him tell me all these things, and me sitting there listening and all the while I just wanted to hit him with a 2x4 and scream "HEY! WAKE UP! I wouldn't treat you like that! I've been in love with you for years!" Of course, I never did. Oh yeah...and there was always chemistry between us, and there were many times that I got the feeling that he may have had a crush on me...but nothing ever happened.

We lost touch, of course. Last I heard he was married.

That's one of many, many stories I have.

Agghh! I am definitely a member of this club!

Here's my screwy situation.

A few months ago, I briefly dated this guy I work with. I'd always been attracted to him, but never pursued anything because he had just gotten out of a long-term relationship and it was a messy breakup--plus, we worked together. But then he asked me out and confessed he'd had feelings for me for a long time, blah blah blah.

Anyway, it didn't work out because he's incredibly fickle.....one minute he was into me, the next he was pulling away. Things just fizzled and I never really found out why.

I moved on and was dating someone exclusively for about two months, and the first guy I messed around with another girl we work with (a whole other story). I broke up with my boyfriend and he and the other girl are now just friends. The thing is, now I realize that even though it's been like three months, and I'm kinda dating someone new now, I still have a major crush on him. WTF? What is WRONG with me?

It's so complicated.....the other girl from work he hooked up with is a girlfriend of mine, and I think she still kinda likes him too, even though he basically did the same damn thing to her. And because I live in a really small town, the dating thing is kinda incestuous. Not only did she and I both date him, he's now trying to date another girl I know.....who happens to good friends with my ex-boyfriend. Even better, my girlfriend is dating this same ex-boyfriend's co-worker.....does everyone follow? Probably not :rolleyes:

Anyway, don't know why I'm so hung up on this guy. And I have to see him every day at work!!!:mad:

Old post I know....
 

It sucks to be the one everyone considers the "best friend type."

Let me just say, Oh dammit YES I belong to this club...

Re: Old post I know....
 

Those are toxic!

Re: Old post I know....
 

Yeah...I belong to this club too