What happened to all the diamonds???
 

Okay...Polltime!!!

Here's the deal, after spending time with my girls this weekend, somehow we got on the subject of marriage proposals. Surprisingly, two of my dear friends stated that they had let their significant other know that if it wasn't at least 2 carats, don't bother!!! This got me thinking...of course most of us would love to have a large, stunning engagement ring, but how many of you guys would actually be disappointed if it were less?

Have any of you ever spoken those words to your significant other?

You gotta be sh*ttin' me! Diamonds are forever, and also are a girl's best friend, but if my GF or SO measured my love for her based upon the carat size of an engagement ring, then that relationship's not gonna last very long, if at all.

My two cents' worth, before taxes take it all away.

Re: What happened to all the diamonds???
 

If a woman ever said that to me, it would be the immediate end of our relationship.

:eek:

That's ridiculous!

For the record, my engagement ring is .53 carats and I think that's big enough! But then, I'm not into flashy jewelry anyway...

its not really about the size..you can have a 2 carat piece of sh*t..

Personally, I think 2 carats is too big. When I get engaged, I'd rather not have something that flashy. Plus, I think that the thought that whoever proposes to me puts into picking out the ring matters more.

I hope they were kidding...! Carat is only one of the four C's.

When my husband and I got engaged, he was a poor starving grad student and couldn't afford a 2-carat rock - and to be honest, I didn't want one - it would look ridiculous on me. My diamond is about half a carat, but with good color, clarity, and cut, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

If I'd insisted on the Rock of Gibraltar, I probably wouldn't be married today.

when/if i'm ever proposed to, i honestly don 't want my ring to be more than a half carat. i have little hands and i don't like flashy jewelry, so that's quite enough for me.

A rock, a pebble, whatever...I'd take it! Although I do prefer smaller stones because my hands are small (my ring finger is a size 3 and a half!).

Anyone remember that thread where someone inavertently came accross a value-priced engagement ring?

How many months of our salary are we *supposed* to drop on this bad boy?

Amen to that.

When Mr. Adrienne was shopping for my ring, I gave him only 2 criteria: yellow gold band and an oval cut. After that it was up to him.
We shopped together for a while and some slease salesman tried to sell us a huge stone he described as "high quality". Problem: it was pee-in-the-snow yellow and you could see the flaws across the room. He must have thought we fell off the turnip truck the day before. :mad:

Another time I tried on a huge set of 3 ovals--it made my hand look anorexic.

IMHO, it's not about the size per se, but how it looks on you. Even the Hope Diamond can look like crap if it's not worn correctly, or if you can't "carry" it well.

My teeny tiny hands are very happy w/ the Grade D flawless 0.5 carat that Mr. Adrienne slipped into a Cracker Jack box. :p

---------------------------------------------
Pardon me while I get corny--the radio was actually playing a song about this on the drive to work. Can't remember who sings it.

"Don't love make a diamond shine
It don't matter if it costs a dime.
Dang thing looks like a million bucks
Sittin' on the hand of a girl in love.

Even a 15-carat
Is duller than dirt if the heart don't wear it."

Adrienne (PNAM-2003)

2 months salary according to the ads.

Although I wouldn't mind being proposed to with a 2 ct. diamond ring, I think what matters is the future marriage not the ring...No wonder the U.S divorce rates are so high.

Although it is NOT a requirement for marriage, however 2 carats would look pretty nice on my finger. :cool:

Shoot, i don't really care, I'd just happy he asked! :D

Here's a question, and something I read about recently. Someone above also mentioned it briefly and in passing:

Is it now customary to go ring shopping together??

Personally, I am very old-fashioned. I will tell a girlfriend what I like, and SHE can go shopping with him. I want to be surprised...I don't need or WANT to be in on this particular decision as far as being there to pick it out....That's not right for me...We'll pick out the wedding bands together...

My boyfriend and I are looking at getting engaged soon, and the way we've done it, is we've gone looking at both engagement and wedding bands together. I've shown him what I like and what I don't, and I think he's becoming comfortable enough in picking out my "style" that when the time comes, he'll be able to go alone.

I wouldn't trust any of my girlfriends to go with him. Though they may have the best of intentions, I have a feeling they would goad him into a bigger stone at the sacrifice of the style I like. (I like smaller, more delicate jewelry myself)

Every time I see a "yellow" diamond, it reminds me of the part in "Beautiful Girls" when Michael Rappaport buys the champagne diamond.

"What difference does it make? Diamonds are supposed to be colorless. You go out and buy a colored diamond for a girl you're not even seeing, man, you've been eating retard sandwiches again."

Sorry, one of my favorite lines from one of my favorite movies :)

Anyways...As a female, I have to say-To hell with the girls that need a 2-carat. I have a few friends like that, holding a contest to see who gets the bigger ring. It's sad and shows their real colors. The Mr. and I are planning on getting engaged soon. We've looked at rings, and he knows what I like. As long as he keeps the basic style in mind (I like simple), I could give two shits what the size is. It's the THOUGHT and the love behind it that matters, not the bling bling.

Let's say that hypothetically I have been engaged, LOL. I got a really awesome, approx. 1.5 carat, D color, almost flawless diamond set in platinum. I looked at it all the time and thought it was really beautiful. It was exactly what I wanted and I was involved in the process of picking it out.

Now, however, I realize that a ring doesn't matter. If I get engaged again, I don't even want an engagement ring. I'd just want to design unique, cool, symbolic wedding rings. When I think about it, I don't even like the symbolism of engagement rings and I just don't think that the idea of a man buying me an engagement ring has any relevance to my life.

That is so true... my fiance said he could have gotten me a diamond that was over 1 carat and it was actually priced at less than the one he ended up getting for me (the slightly more than 1/2 carat). The difference was the clarity. He said the bigger one had too many flaws. So yeah I'd rather have a smaller one that looks really nice. But what means the most to me as far as the ring goes is that he put a lot of THOUGHT into the purchase, and into surprising me... plus he asked my parents before he asked me, which was a MAJOR plus! That's why I love my ring :)

There are 3 things my boyfriend has memorized about what I want in my engagement ring (we're looking to get engaged fairly soon).
1. The cut - princess
2. The band - white gold (although I would LOVE platinum, who wouldn't?) :)
3. The size - 8 (I have chubby fingers, my mom told me it's from cracking my knuckles all the time ?)
I don't even care what size it is, as long as the color, cut, and clarity are good and that he took the time to pick it out.

Just kicking in another vote to say that I would never wear a 2-carat diamond ring.

I'm not saying that I don't have standards for my future engagement ring, though . . . just that it being huge is definitely not one of them. I hardly ever wear jewelry, and I never wear flashy jewelry, so a big diamond ring would look out of place.

I'd make sure my significant other knew what I wanted in an engagement ring, too, so that it wouldn't be an issue that he would try to get me something I didn't want.

Wow, thank you for that excellent and informative post, Hootie!!

I do have to say, though... that as a woman, there's nothing more annoying than hearing a stuck up woman demand something from a man!

And THAT is probably why one of them has been with her boyfriend for like 6 years...no proposal yet!!! ;)

I think it's downright tacky to tell someone what size diamond you HAVE to have in order to get married. Spoiled much? :rolleyes:

Quite honestly, I couldn't care less what size of diamond I get. It's not a contest in my group of friends to see who's got the bigger rock, and I'm glad that we're all "down to earth" in that sense. My bf knows that I'll be thrilled with whatever he selects, and if he does ask for my opinion, I'll remind him that I have small hands and that a big diamond just wouldn't look right. I'd much prefer something small and simple with a nice cut over some gaudy rock that doesn't suit my hand. :)

i guess i will be going against the tides here, but honestly, i do want a 1 ct diamond, with all of the c's looking really good! no questions, no compromise. ok, so i am bitchy, but there are very few things that i want. i don't want a big wedding...i want to elope. i am not materialistic, but this is something that i have really had my heart set on! my last bf and i were talking engagement and had gone ring shopping (and no, we didn't break up bc of the ring i wanted....if you really want the long story, you can pm me). he knew what i wanted well before we hit the jewelry store.

i would never send a man to the store to buy my ring alone! i would like to go shopping and show him things i like and dislike and then let him choose from there. this way, it is still a surprise, but i won't be smiling and saying that i love it, when i really don't!

One of my friends was given a diamond the size of a dime. No joke, it was huge. She didn't ask for it or demand it. She just happened to fall in love with a very successful and generous man. It couldn't have happened to a nicer woman, except for me of course. :p ;)

Women picking the ring...
 

I know it's really common for women to pick out their own engagement rings, but I'm one of the few left that wouldn't have wanted it that way. I like surprises, and having no clue that my guy was going to propose made it that much more special and memorable for me. It's something I'll remember for the rest of my life... but if I had known about it ahead of time I just can't see that it would have been all that memorable. Plus I think it means more when the guy takes the time to pick out the ring. Of course I guess that doesn't work for women who just HAVE to have a specific type of diamond...

And seriously, a 1/2 carat gets in my way at work enough as it is because I work with my hands a lot. If I had anything bigger, I'd never be able to wear it, cuz I'm like ALWAYS at work. :p

My husband and I did go ring shopping together... he proposed without a ring, then we went shopping.

An engagement ring is a ring you're going to wear for a long time, a symbol of your love, and it should be a decision that you share.

Of course, it did mean that for 6 weeks I couldn't walk into a chapter meeting without getting asked "Do you have the ring? Do you have the ring?" :D

This is how I'd want it done. :) I'd want the surprise of not knowing he was going to propose, but I'd also want to be involved in the process of picking out my own ring.

I think this way also puts a lot less stress on the guy, because most guys know that they don't know much about jewelry! :p

as the product of an all-girls, private school education (for high school i mean) i was TAUGHT by one of my teachers not to accept less than a carat. in my honest opinion it means alot to me that a man is willing to spend alot on a token of our eternal love, that shows me that he is in it for the long run...

BUT really all i ask for is a classic tiffany engagement ring (which by the way start at only 1,000 dollars) set in platinum. i dont expect the hope diamond just something that is worth the money and will look priceless as well as timeless :)

aaaaaaaaaaa...i am still "patiently" awaiting that special moment

I want it to be a total surprise, ring and all.

However, once it gets to the point where a proposal could be looming, my should probably have figured out that I only wear white metal. That's something a guy should be able to figure out on his own. I don't care if it's white gold or platinum, and as long as the diamond isn't shitty clarity, I'd appreciate any size.

But if I wanted to pick, I'd probably pick a 1 or 2 carat marquis or princess cut set in a medium thickness platinum band.

But I really want the romance of surprise.

Can women tell if it's cubic zirconium?;)

Is it just me or doesn't the fiancee lose all moral authority when she takes it to the jeweler to have it appraised?:D

Actually, many people get rings appraised for "good" reasons, for example, to make sure that the diamond really is what the seller said it is. This isn't so much of a problem if the diamond is GIA certified, but it's never a bad idea. Also, she may at some point take the ring in to get it cleaned or resized, and I'm sure any jeweler would say something if it was a CZ.

Ya'll should know I'd never consider doing that.

I still don't really understand why the $$ part of a ring is so important -- or do many think that if the guy isn't willing to part with his $ he doesn't love you enough?

I'm sure this isn't the case for every women, but I think that for a lot of women, it's that the engagement ring is the most obvious symbol for the engagement itself, and if their fiancee isn't willing to put some time, effort, money and care into it, they start to wonder how much time, effort, money and care he will put into the marriage. A fake diamond would kind of reflect a "fake relationship," in a sense . . . especially if he lied to her and told her the CZ was a diamond.

(You can tell I've been writing too many English papers when I start getting this deep into the symbolism of engagement rings, lol :p !)

As you've seen from these posts, though, it's pretty obvious that money is not the only factor, or even the most important one. I think most of us would be happier with a $2,000 ring that reflected our tastes and showed that he had taken what we liked and what was important to us into account, than we would be with a $10,000 ring that was uncomfortable, unpractical, tacky or just not in line with our taste.

My fiance designed our engagement ring. When I first saw it, I was a bit disappointed, because there's a center stone and 5 small ones, and it wasn't exactly "me".

Then I found out that he had used diamonds that had been set in his grandmother's ring, and that the <> diamond shaped carvings were to symbolize my sorority - which he realizes is important to me!

So, okay, it's maybe a carat total, but with that much history and that much planning, I think both the ring & my fiance are keepers! :)

honeychile

You know, I wouldn't mind receiving a .75 or 1 carat Princess cut diamond from my boyfriend. But I can honestly say that I would be just as happy receiving his fraternity pin as a symbol of our love. That's how we met...through his fraternity and my sorority having a social together. So it would only be natural to base our future off our involvement in the Greek community.

One day, it will happen. Until then, I am patiently waiting....and hinting :D (My sisters think it will happen within the year though).


Jadey

I think we have some fibbers on this thread who don't want to look materialistic and shallow so they say "Oh, I could never have 1 carat, my hands are so delicate...." :rolleyes: ;) :p I'm teasing you all, but in a nice way, so no offense to anyone!

But come on, who doesn't want a nice rock on her hand?!? I have always told my boyfriend all I need is a nice 2 carat diamond solitare in a platinum setting! :D I doubt I would actually get that much, but I expect at least a carat. I know how much money my boyfriend makes, I know his financial obligations, and I know he can afford that. So, I am shallow because I want it? I don't think so. However, if I was dating a starving artist or a college student, of course I would not expect something that big! But if he can afford a decent size, that's what I want.

Hey, Hootie - jewlery question. Would a specific diamond cost the same in Nebraska as it would in NYC, for the most part. I mean, if all things are equal (the C's)? Because I was thinking that I see plenty of carat plus rings here and I have a theory about it, but need your info. to see if I'm right.

Edited to add: I tell my boyfriend I want the 2 carat, but it's not a demand! He knows it's not a demand!

Re: SURVEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

I would be fine with it. I too would walk away while the actual transaction took place and the financing, etc. was discussed. I wouldn't see it as a ruined moment... I would want him to take it home and put it on my hand when we were alone and officially "ask" me... but to me, the important part of it happened when he told me many months ago that he wants to marry me.