Question about married chicks
 

I wanted to see what some of you thought about this situation.

I consider myself as well as my friends to be moral men, but a situation has arose that has me thinking on what is right and what is wrong.

Let's say I have this friend. He has a girlfriend but she lives in another town. He met this chick out at a club awhile ago. She's 21, married and just moved from Detroit to Florida. The chick is hot, in my view. My friend met her husband one time while out and bought him a few drinks, they chilled and found out they have a lot in common. They get along. Now, the guys wife asked for my friends phone number, he gave it to her. The girl calls up the next day and wanted to hang out. After hanging out with her they realized they too have a lot in common and decide to hang out more. Eventually he found out that she's been sneaking behind her husbands back to meet him.

Now, they hang out all the time these days. It's got to the point to where they smoke out all the time, drink and now the chick tells him she has only rolled once and would like to do it with him since her husband has never done any kind of drug. The two have never kissed or made out as well as sex, though I'm sure the thought has crossed both of their minds. I know what happens when two people roll together, usually it ends up where the two eventually realize they have strong feelings for one another. The thing is though, the girl lies to her husband about going to see this guy. He has no clue as to whats going on. She calls him in the morning to wake my friend up, she calls him after her husband is gone from lunch and she calls him at night when her husband isn't home.

What makes this even more sticky is that her husband is in the military and is about to be shipped off to war. They've talked about what could happen should things get nasty over in Iraq. She told him she's going to stay in Florida for the duration, which means she would then have no restraints as far as doing what she wants with my friend. He has a girlfriend and hasn't told her about his friend. I know he feels guilty to a certain level, but they've never done anything to jepordize their current relationships.

What do some of you think about this situation? Is it wrong? Is it ok as long as nothing sexual happens? Should he cut all ties to this chick now, before things progress....if they do? In one sense I know that if you can't share the friendship with your current lover then odds are that it shouldn't be happening. But, on the otherhand it's just a friendship. Some of us think he should just nip things at the bud while others in our crew think he should keep coasting along.

First, I would like to preface this with I do not condone drug use...I've never tried any kind of drug, so your'e on you own with that one!;)

I can say this, though. My boyfriend is in the military and is being "shipped off" as well. I cannot tell you how stressed he is. Just this past weekend, we were asleep when his phone rang at 1 am...he went into work until 3 am, came home, went back at 5 am and worked until 3 pm. Then, at 9 pm he was called back to pack "sensitive items"....I went with him and we didn't get home until 2 am. Soliders were on the phones with wifes, husbands, girlfriends, boyfriends.....crying, consloing, you name it. Matt told me the only thing getting him through all this that I would remain faithful, which I truly will.

It is unfair to put your friend's girlfriend's husband through that. Period. If their marriage is that messed up, then maybe they should seek counseling. Drugs/cheating certainly won't help the situation....especially if the husband is going to be put through hell in Iraq.

Thats my .02 cents....

Blaire

Your friend needs to find a single woman to hang out with and stay away from the married ones. She needs to go bond with the oter wives and share her experience/feelings with them, not chase another man!

If she's lying to her husband, what is she lying to your friend about???

your friend needs to stay away from this woman, especially if he's met the husband and likes him. no guy deserves to know that while he was overseas (and before he went) his wife was spending her time with another man. that's just more stress to add to the situation.

He should just get over it and bang her already.

What the hell is his problem anyway? She is obviously shaking her tail in his face . . . he should take a bite already lol.

Tell him to "hump or get off the pot".

Jeez. I swear, people are soo stupid.

If you get a married woman pregnant, you should send her husband a cucku clock.

I know, I told him the same thing. Personally, I think he should rail her a$$ a few times and then dip the phuck out when war starts. Consistantly banging a married woman cannot be good for any bachelor.


His fear is that once he hits it he might get what some of us call, pu$$y whipped. It's totally understandable though, I know how easy it is to get whipped if the chick is a good phuck. And, the girl looks like she's a good phuck. That b!tch looks like Devon, the pornstar.....only she's about 5'10 instead of 5'3.

sweeping generalization....this chickie-babe's first mistake was getting married at age 21 (or earlier). But since it's done, it's done, and your friend should back off. Military men have lots of strength and combat techniques. I would not like to be the one they are used on.

if it was a group together, no problem, but one on one all the time is just asking for trouble.

I don't know, my boy's actually really big.....bigger than me.


He's 6'5 and somewhere around 260. He said her husband is a shrimp, but he is a marine.

Yeah, I wouldn't mess with the Marine. They are trained to kill people.

Anyway, if you told your friend to bang her than I dare say you are far from moral. You sure can think that you like someone, and be sexually attracted to them and still choose to do nothing. And your friend should do nothing since she is married, especially while he is at war. How bad would your friend feel if he was the last person to sleep with this guy's wife before he died? Of course, I know it takes two to tango, and she should have enough sense in her not to bang your friend as well. So, your friend should tell the woman that rolling is not a good idea, and take pains to keep the realtionship platonic.

As for the sneaking, well... that really isn't your friend's problem. You never know what her husband is like. He may be insanely jealous if she even looks at something with facial hair. She shouldn't have to lie about having male friends to her husband, but if that is all they are, then it is her issue that she is lying.

My advice (and good advice I do admit).

You rule dude.

Some of these new folks seem to know a lot about us old folks...hmmmmmm

Hmmmmm, that's exactly what I was thinking.....you never know

Michelle,

I have to disagree. Isn't it true that the boy in uestion has absolutely no honorable committment to anyone in this scenario? I mean, he isn't the one in a committed relationship.

He isn't doing anything wrong if he "taps that ass." So why shouldn't he?

He isn't married. He can do what he wants. She's the evil one for playing her hubby out like a fool. Isn't she?

And why should he feel bad if he is the last person to sleep with her before he dies? It has nothing to do with morality.

No comment on the situation, but what's "roll"?

I tell ya, I learn SO much on GC! LOL

Well, he definitely wouldn't be on the same level of immorality as the wife would be if he went for it . . . but there still would be something bad about his behavior, in my opinion. If he knows that she has a husband and is still helping her cheat on her husband, that's not exactly "honorable." There's just something questionable about sleeping with another man's wife, even if you're not married yourself.

But then, most questions of morality are pretty much subjective when you get right down to it.

It's my understanding that both parties involved would be guilty of adultery if they slept together, NOT just the married woman. It would be one thing if the guy didn't know she was married, but since he does, it would be totally immoral for him to sleep with her.

And yes, I do believe that the circumstances of their relationship are wrong, even if they are not having sex or even kissing. The fact that she's lying to her husband and hiding things from him is wrong in and of itself. Your friend, however, hasn't technically done anything wrong... yet.

I think your friend would be wise to cut ties with this chick, she's obviously got some issues.

SSS1365 You sure said it a LOT nicer than I will!!!!:mad:

If they do ANY kind of drug together, I would bet my bottom dollar they will have sex.

So, if America got all upset over Jimmy Carter "lusting in his heart", what perception do you think people have of THIS situation???

The girl is a piece of TRASH (IMO). James, you can think what you want and advise how you want, but that does NOT change the fact that marriage is a binding and BLESSED union. To forsake ALL OTHERS...A VOW for heaven's sake!!!

I feel so damn sorry for the marine. If your friend were REALLY an honorable man, he would walk away and HONOR the marriage contract between the two. Otherwise...he's no better than she is!!! :mad: ...and I hope they BOTH get what they deserve! Perhaps he wants to be named in court!

I take marriage seriously!

I agree with JAM

-Rudey

DITTO!!!:mad:

Wow...all I can say is that I'm glad my boyfriend does not have James' mindset...he's a real man

If that is true, then why do so many people get divorced so frequently? What is the stat up to now, 7 out of 10 marriages end in divorce?



You may, but obviously most of the people out there don't take it seriously or consider it binding!

Blair and justamom- you said it!!!

Wow, James I am really impressed with the lack of morality that you have! Go find yourself some values!
He would be crossing an ethical line if he knowingly and willingly slept with a married woman, no matter her decision. It takes two to tango, and both parties would be at fault for decit and adultry. He would not, in my opinion, be "less at fault" either-- he just doesn't have to face the consequences of a broken marriage. You also ask to whom this guy has a commitment. I'd say he has one to himself. How can you really think yourself a good person if you decide not to take yourself out of a situation where you will break up a marriage????? You could reason that they shouldn't be together, but if that is the case, she must decide based on her relationship with her husband itself, not by comparison with another realtionship, that divorce is what she wants.

Marriages end in divorce a lot, for all sorts of reasons, but does that make a promise or a commitment any less important? No.

Ya know, one of my problems is that I'm usually way too nice. Justamom more accurately said what I was thinking!

I'm gonna have to agree with JAM and the others on this one.

Yeah, your bud has no committment to anyone in this situation, but in a way he's encouraging her to commit adultery.

Personally, i'm not into the dope scene, but i think for them to be smoking out together is again, just asking for trouble.

I know that i would hate to be the guy who broke up a marriage, especially a marriage involving someone who fights for this country. I think your boy needs to bow out.

Kitso
KS 361

Eclipse... Roll = X.

Anyway, on the situation... I think the friend should probably avoid this girl. He can tell her to give him a call after her marriage ends (which it inevitably will, based on this saga). :)

I mean, sure, he could hit it with this girl, maybe even without guilt, but it is wrong by society's standards. And it will only bring drama...

There are plenty of hot single girls out there. I'm sure he can find plenty that he has things in common with.

Don't get me wrong, every time he goes out with us he has other pu$$y lined up.......it's just I think he actually likes hanging out with this chick. Thats kinda weird, it totally goes against my theory that no guy wants to just hang out with a chick and expect nothing out of it.

If that were my wife, I'd probably break every bone in the guys body and then toss my wife out on her a$$. If we had any kids I'd make sure she didn't get them.

The way I look at it, if a b!tch is good enough for me to marry, I better be good enough for her not to cheat on. Plain and simple.

However, I do know how hard it is to turn down a good piece of a$$ because of a commitment already in place.

Um, am I the only person that's a little annoyed by certain peoples' referral to women as "bitches" in this thread? :rolleyes:

Actually it's still at about 5 out of 10 . . . the divorce rate has actually gone down since the 1970s and has been holding steady at about 50% for about ten years (?) now I think.

Second that motion...!

So do I, even though I have never married. (Eventually I will settle down and take the plunge, but it's not a high priority right now.)

When I took my obligation as a Master Mason I swore to uphold the institution of marriage, not just to the female relatives of a brother Mason, but to others as well.

I swore the chastity to shield
Of woman true and tender;
Of Mason’s widow, wife and child,
His mother, sister undefiled;
Each pure and innocent whose love
Makes Mason’s homes like that above,
I am their sworn defender.

Some of my favorite parts of the long creed of Sigma Nu refer to this:

Kitso
KS 361 times i think of how uncontrollably pissed i would be if someone called my mother or sister a "bitch"