Why is it so hard to date greek guys?
 

I've really had it, I can not date any more fraternity guys. This is just the 5th week of school and these guys are really awful. All they want to do is try to sleep with you and when you tell them "no" your not going to sleep with them (when you first meet them at the bar) or try to get you to go home with them after the mixer is over. Then they act like jerks. I have high morals and standards and refuse to sleep with someone that I do not know and is not my boyfriend.

I guess they are so use to girls just going home with them and sleeping with them. They just assume every girl that they meet will do the same.

Yeah I really do like the guy I'm seeing it's just I don't think I will continue seeing him anymore.

Thanks for listening.

Annice22
Phi Sigma Sigma

It's just not greek guys, it's college guys period.

In men's defense, you were at a bar, which is college battlefield for sex. Plus, they are just playing the odds game. 9/10 times a guy will get shot down, there's still that 1/10 chance, lol. No but I don't mean to be offensive, but I knew girls just as guilty as the guys in greek organizations, so it's all equal if you ask me...


RUgreek

And...what's wrong with non-greek guys?

I don't just meet these guys at the bar
 

I don't just meet these guys at the bar I have classes with some of them and they look at you like your a piece of meat. I wear regular clothes to class. Blue jeans and a sweatshirt or a top. So it not like I'm advertising my body or anything. I talked to the guy I like on the phone tonight and here is his exact words Mine: I have to write my self-evaluation for my presentation. His: I can help you fill in you self-evaluation. Mine: So how would you answer the questions. His: You could fill it with something hard and long. Ok now tell me if there is not something wrong with this conversation. I was talking about my home-work assigment and he was talking about something else.

So, I don't know what I'm suppose to do I just told him I had to finish my homework.

Annice22

yea, that's pretty sad, but you know what, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. No, obviously don't DO anything with them, but tease the immature morons. It's college, you're suppose to have fun, not complain.

And on a side note, there are nice guys out there, even in the greek orgs., don't stereotype the whole group/house based on 99% of the members. Maybe one of them is the nice guy. Oh well, in any case, I wouldn't recommend homework with that loser...


RUgreek

Re: I don't just meet these guys at the bar
 

Good lord, girl, are you SERIOUS?! I can't believe that someone over the age of 14 would say such a stupid thing!

There *are* great guys out there, but I don't know where to tell you to find them. I think you always end up finding them when you're not looking. But I'd kick Mr. Hard and Long to the curb.

Honestly, it's not just the fraternity guys that are all about sex...and in that same respect it's not just guys either. It's just a lot easier for many people to go with the stereotype and lump all guys that are after sex as fraternity guys, or "frat boys". The difference between the guys and the girls is that old double standard where it is perfectly acceptable for men to "sew their wild oats" whereas a woman who does the same is considered a slut.

I know my freshman year, the fraternity guys were not the ones committing the sexual assaults on campus, the few that we had that is. But many people just choose to see fraternities as a negative aspect of college campuses. As such, fraternities get a bad rep, whether it's deserved or not.

Thanks I'm off to sleep
 

Well, I'm off to bed. Thanks everyone for the advice and new ways of looking at this. I will try to to have some fun and try not to complain. I even showed respect for the guy by not naming his fraternity.

Good Night

Annice22
Phi Sigma Sigma

This should go for Female greeks as well...(wink wink)
 

Yeah, I've had bad luck with the other half of the greek spectrum. Girls can be just as bad as men...Went through 3 sorority girlfriends and now I'm madly in love with a girl who is not. Guess that's the way the cookie crumbles...

i am a strong believer in NOT stereotyping.. maybe its because you see greeks most often you think they behave like this more than the general public??
i am also an equal oppurtunity hater- MEN SUCK

that is all ;)

DONT WORRY
 

Dont worry it is a part of growing up and one day you will reach the age and you will know who is sisere.you just have to hold out :D

I'll talk with him today
 

Good morning

Well, today I will see him so maybe I'll tell him that needs to show and treat me with respect. I am not like the other girls he meets. I also want to get to know him more and if that's too much to ask then I guess I have to move on. I really do like to have fun, so maybe I really don't need anyone right now. It's not just him, I have met some of his brothers in a non-romantic way and they all try to get into your pants.

I have to get ready to go to work.

Annice22
Phi Sigma Sigma

I don't date frat boys b/c I feel uncomfortable with the whole situation. I am in a sorority, but my group is very non-traditional and multicultural. I'm Black and most of the mixers that my sorority has are with predominantly white fraternities. One of the frats, TKE, has black members, but I just don't feel comfortable with it all. I do date outside of my race, my ex-boyfriend is white, but the frat boys here don't seem like they would date outside of their race. Maybe i'm wrong. But, I decided that I don't wanna have anything to do with any frat boys. I just don't think very highly of them.

Geez... what to say here?

I know that one thing my particular chapter prides ourselves in is the fact that we treat women with respect. We strive to be known as gentlemen. Sure members slip now and then but they'll here about it from their brothers.

Please don't make general assumptions that all guys wearing greek letters are bad people, degrade women, etc. I'd know a lot of women that would disagree with your comments here about "frat boys".

Definitely Not Just Greek Guys
 

Let me just tell you it's definitly not just greek guys. My boyfriend of 5 years has had so many girls try to take him home after mixers it horrible. Even we he tell them that he has a girl friend they say "Well I don't care" Then when I pull up to take him home they dissapear. So while not all girls are this way there are just as many girls as guys.

General rule of thumb... if they won't do anything with you outside of a bar, all they really want is sex.

Okay, I keep trying to post this but GC is being SO slow!

Anyway, I am going to make a sweeping generalization here, so prepare yourself: BOYS LIKE SEX (and girls too, for that matter!)

However, a boy's hormone levels do not increase just because he chooses to sport Greek letters. Non-Greek guys like sex too...

So, my rule is not that I do not date fraternity boys... it is that I don't try to start a relationship with boys I meet at bars. Instead, I date boys I meet in class, volunteering, or through friends. Of course, these boys too want to hook up, but usually not as soon as we meet (or maybe they just don't act on it so quickly... they can't really try to grind with you in class)!

*Disclaimer: I do agree that sometimes when a large group of guys are hanging out together, it can breed a macho attitude... so I guess that boys in fraternity may act a little more into sex... however, I am sure the non-Greek guys are too... they just don't show it all the time!

edited for grammar!

Find a Theta Chi.

I wasn't trying to over generalize all frat guys Just....
 

We do not have theta chi at my school. I wasn't trying to generalize or sterotype all fraternity guys. It was just the fraternity guys here at my school they always seem to be "looking to get some" all the time and they don't care with whom. Plus, the guy i like is probably too immature for me anyway.

This is going to sound real bad, but bear with me.

It’s the beginning of a new school year and because of this there is an abundance of new girls on campus. Freshman girls are no longer under their parents control and guys will take advantage of this fact. I know that’s how it is here. One of my friends refers to it as the “freshman fun time” because the freshman are willing to do things they normally wouldn’t because now they can. After a month or two, it starts to die down a little bit, and with it, the guys hormones. I’m not saying that the girls are at fault or that the guys are for that matter. It’s just that many people are looking to just have fun, and for some, that means sex. If that’s not what you’re looking for, then say no. And if that doesn’t work, try to find a friend to help you out of the situation.

that's because most guys do want some:) I understand that this sort of personality is not what you are looking for, so just ignore him and meet other guys. In the interests of sounding P.C., don't stereotype his house, but honestly I don't think you'll find your winner there. Just have fun, it's college :cool:

RUgreek

sexism?
 

I've had girls say some pretty immature things to me too. I hold to the theory that girls are just as confused and frustrated at guys as guys are confused and frustrated at girls. In this more than anything else is there equality between men and womyn.
Most of the guys in my house have girlfriends, including me. I can't imagine of us saying anything immature like that.


My advice to you is to stop lookin' for those guys who'll tell you that you have nice legs and then ask you what time they'll open.
And disregard whoever gave the advice to become a cock tease ("If you can't fight 'em join 'em" or whatever). You don't want to stoop down to that level, you want to associate with guys at your level.
Keep your chin up!


PS: The same advice goes to guys out there lookin' to get away from ditsy girls! Look for ones at your level who play with your feelings like you have none.

Check out the What is it with girls thread in chit chat for some of my adventures in bitchland.

Most college guys here are ick! Me and my roomates call the nasty-get-in-your-pants ones chotchi's... Every guy that I've met here is one, but that could be because we only meet guys at bars, and the guys that are at the bars are automatically out to get some @$$. My suitemate went to this one guys frat house that she'd been friends with before, and she turned him down when he asked her to spend the night, and he told her "I can't believe you turned me down, no girl ever turns me down. You are a freshman, you are supposed to be easy, start acting like one." She slapped him. :) Then she met some guy at a bar and went back to his room, and they made out, and he took off his shirt and told her "Lets @#$!" and she was like "Okay, that really makes me want to... that's not my style." and he told her "I was just kidding, I can give it to you anyway you like." Then he passed out, and she left... A few weeks ago, I was at a bar, and some nasty came up to me, and we were dancing, and for some reason he though he could put his hands down my pants... No, I don't think so... I felt so disgusting... I squiggled out of there faster than he could turn around and molest someone else...

Where do these random nasty's get their ideas?

They get their ideas from the girls who let them do it...and the girls that act the same way.

I don't like slutty girls! Well, I do. But not for to dating. Do not meet guys at parties. Meet in class. Date guy who helps you with your study group. Take him to formal. He will treat you like a gentleman like the lady you are.

LAST NIGHT...
 

I have a new complaint about greek guys...

Let me explain a little something really quick...
We don't have houses, we have halls. There are two different fraternities in each separate building. My boyfriend's fraternity is in the same building as the fraternity that we're doing homecoming with. There are actually three floors, the first is the lounges, which are side-by-side. We were practicing homecoming dances in the lounge last night. All right, now hopefully you can understand a little better what's up...

...I went to the top floor last night (homecoming fraternity) to use the bathroom. On my way downstairs, I ran into my boyfriend who was carrying in some liquor. He asked me what I was doing, and I said homecoming practice (which he seemed shocked about) and I asked him if he was going to the mixer (they had a mixer with tri-delt... for the record, I love the girls, and I hang out more with them socially because they mix with my boyfriend's fraternity a lot). He replied, snapping, "yeah, I live here!" I dunno where the mixer actually was, but I can pretty much guarantee that only the pre-party was on the hall. Anyway, I'm not upset that he was going to the mixer, but the fact that he snapped at me kills me. I can't decide whether this is the end, or just a fight. I hope to GOD just a fight. Anyway, mixers with other sororities... that's the hardest part about dating a greek guy.

Only if you're insecure about your reltaionship.