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More tips on rush
I know my tips and suggestions on rush won't be looked upon favorably by some but I was given these and going through as a sister I know that unfortunately they do help.
1) Make sure your nails look nice. (You don't have to get a professional manicure but please make sure your polish isn't chipping. Clear polish is fine too but make sure your nails are clean and even and nice looking.) We have so many great girls who go through and we need to make a certain amount of cuts each round that we have made cuts on some girls who have had bad looking nails. It's shallow I know but we had to have a reason to cut someone and not to cut another girl. 2) Do not wear too much makeup. Especially if you are rushing when it's very hot outside. Makeup melts and mascara runs and you need to look your best but also look natural. 3) Don't wear a watch. I had a GREAT girl and she kept looking at her watch. I thought it was out of habit that she looked at her watch but wasn't sure if she was just bored. Again, we had to cut so many girls that we cut her inorder to keep another girl that we liked better. 4) I wouldn't wear a short skirt. I just wouldn't. I would wear a skort but skirts when you are sitting have a way to creep up on you and that could be ugly. 5) I wouldn't talk about guys at all (unless you have a brother in a fraternity at your school) and wouldn't talk about other sororities. 6) SMILE SMILE SMILE. Show real interest (think about it as pre job interview.) Even if you are tired, bored, hate the house, etc. smile, show excellent eye contact, shake the girls hand, THANK THEM for their time, compliment the girl and act impressed. They are working hard and want girls to appreciate that. 7) The skits mean NOTHING. They are simply entertainment. TALK TALK TALK to the girls as much as you can because these will be your friends. Who do you see yourself with when you are 35 years old sipping lemonade while your kids are out playing? Sororities, IMHO, are about friendship first, social second and service third. And, when you have friends that you can have fun with and be yourself with and have them love you no matter what and love them no matter what, you are more inclined to want to give something back to your community when you feel support and good about yourself. 8) DO NOT be uppity! Even if you are a triple legacy and drop dead gorgeous, if you have a bad attitude, you will be dropped. It happened to me, I had to go to our province president in TEARS and beg to cut this girl who was beyond gorgeous but also a triple legacy. She was beyond rude to me and there was no reason to be. We cut her and you know what? All the other houses cut her too. And, when we had the opportunity to snap bid her even though we made quota and was at total, we declined. 9) I just think that you need to be nice and friendly and be personable and not have it be about guys and who you party with and whether you have the tiffany tag bracelet (which I love by the way). In a nut shell, LOOK NICE, CLASSLY, eye contact, no mention of men, and act like this is a job interview. You want this job so how are you going about getting it?? |
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------------------ Travelling with no boundaries, moving in imaginary. |
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If you wear sandals, make sure your toenails look nice too! |
Remember that these are only suggestion and may only pertain to particular chapters/schools.
While I think some active members are trying to help potential members, some of these "hints/tips/suggestion" boards are only succeeding in scaring the crap out of them! Be yourself, follow your heart, and the rest will take care of itself. [This message has been edited by LeslieEMU (edited August 08, 2001).] |
Just to clarify the position here, not ALL sororities care about stuff like your nail polish having a slight chip or looking at your watch to make sure you're on time and on schedule. Be yourself and I can tell you that you'll find your place. It's hokey, yes, but it works. I've seen tons of gorgeous, perfectly primped and dressed women go through rush, end up at XYZ and hate it because the only reason they chose her was because of her appearance, and never bothered to get to know her. In any case, she ended up depledging, rushing again, getting a bid from us, because she was so great inside too, and she loves her sorority now.
So, in the ever hokey words of a rusher, follow your heart and you'll end up where you're supposed to. ------------------ Delta Phi Epsilon, Celebrating 84 years of Dedication, Pride and Excellence! |
Two thoughts...
Yes, the skits are meaningless, but do not fall asleep during them. Try to look interested, even if you are not. In addition to avoiding short skirts, watch your necklines. One girl came to my house and was referred to as "the girl who needed a better bra." She was actually my rush crush, and joined my chapter, but you don't want to be that girl during rush. |
Forgot to mention in my previous post that the "watch rule" is legit. At my campus, the active members are not even allowed to wear watches during parties and the potential new members are encouraged not to wear them because it is considered rude.
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You know I totally agree with Leslie. If I had read this before I rushed I probably wouldn't have rushed! As a PNM I didn't want to be judged as a piece of meat. I know it depends on what school you go to, but I think I come from a fairly competitive school. I went through it with a smile and an optimistic attitude and I did fine! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif Girls, when you're rushing a house just be yourself and don't worry too much about saying "the wrong thing" or how your nails look. If a house cuts you because of a wrinkled skirt or a slightly chipped nail then you obviously don't need them anyway. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif Good luck and just remember this: Have fun with it! ------------------ "Having a sister is like having a best friend you can't get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there." -Amy Li |
I do NOT want to come off as rude, BUT I honestly believe that if a sorority cuts someone for something as materialistic/petty as nails, then a girl is better off not in that sorority. If you use this tactic as a last resort (ex. you have so many girls that you have to resort to these type of reasons), then I believe that you did not do your JOB as the rusher. I know that time with these girls is short, but you shouldn't spend it analyzing their appearance, but instead spend it finding out WHO they are and WHAT they are about. While your looking at their nails, you might accidently miss that special attribute that they can offer you and your sisterhood. I'm only saying this because I care about the girls going through Rush...I don't want them to be self-conscious or feel as if they aren't good enough. AND for those GOING THROUGH RUSH...just to let you know, I bite my nails! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif
------------------ Whitney |
No one is really saying you'll be cut for having dirty nails, BUT-- if it comes down to one spot and its you and another PNM up for it--you don't want to be remembered as the girl with dirty nails. If its tight and close and competetive, this will be remembered, and its only human to nit-pick when things get intense--and it DOES get intense when choosing new members.
The job interview analogy is a great one. You wouldn't go to a job interview in a tight as all get out shirt, with dirty nails, or runny mascara. Don't rush like this. Be yourself, and be comfortable, but present your best self too. Your personality will shine through, but it is the WHOLE package--mind, heart, soul and body that is being looked at. |
Thank you soooo much. You just gave us some of the "unspoken" tips. The only one that somewhat disturbs me is the one about makeup. So they might cut me if I wear a good deal of makeup?
gggggggggrrrrr...this is all sooo stressful!!! aaaaagghh. It just seems to me that with all these bits of advice, I'm gonna go in acting like something that I'm just not. If these are the girls who I want as sisters, why is it so important for me to sensor all that I say?? thank you again for all your help!! |
I really look at it this way. You are going on a job interview. You don't want to show up at a job interview wearing TONS of makeup, tons of jewelry, sexy clothes, etc. Even if you are interviewing with a company that is super casual in the basement of a guys house, you should still wear a business suit. You adapt to the climate.
Think the same with rush. You can still show your individuality but you wouldn't go to a job interview and talk and talk and talk about all the dates you go on, right? You would put your best foot forward and when you can SUBTLY throw in that you just happen to volunteer for the AIDS walk and you're interviewing with a company that does AIDS research, that is smart interviewing skills. If you wear a lot of makeup that is who you are, BUT would you tone in down if you were interviewing with Microsoft? I would think you probably would. Again, these are just my opinions. Here's more. 1) Be careful about what you say to your Rho Chi. I personally had a horrible experience with mine and thankfully I didn't say anything too personal in front of her. 2) If you sit on the floor, or a chair too, sit up straight, don't lounge. I have seen way too many girls practically laying on the floor. Sit lady like with your legs together and crossed whenever possible. 3) Again, like a job interview, do research. Look at the sororities web site and throw in that you know their philanthrophy is XYZ. That would score some points most likely. You are showing interest. 4) I would listen to other girls (I would) but not participate in the discussion. I know I know you need to make the decision for yourself but I will be honest, I made a lot of my decisions based on the type of girl that was making a statement about a certain house. This classless and rude and arrogant girl was invited back to a certain house again and again and I didn't want to be a part of that group if they invite back girls like that. Quote:
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wow, you can get dropped because of how your nails look? I didn't know that.
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May I also please add that while you certainly don't want to come across as uninterested during rush, you don't want to come across as way to eager either. Girls that come in talking a mile a minute and OHMYGODI'MSOEXCITEDTOBEHEREANDCANTWAITFORHOMECOMIN G are loked at (at least at my chapter) as girls who are way too eager to please and fit in right away. We would rather take in a girl who shows interest by asking questions without raising her voice to shreaking levels and smiling when it is natural to do so.
It's kind of like we want girls who have self respect and self esteem and self confindence that it will be no sweat for them if they don't get a bid from us. does any of this make sense? I know I have posted many comments and some are probably contridictory but all of these posts and our pre rush rehersals are triggering a lot of memories. Quote:
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Quick question-
I know that rec letters get your foot in the door, and a lot of times will get you invited to at least round 2. However, I was wondering if having a rec could help out in one of those down to the wire type of decisions. For example... if two girls rushing both were "five star girls", right down to the polish on their toesies, and a decision had to be made, would the girl with a recommendation letter get the bid? Just curious... Molly |
Not being a girl I could never Rush sororities, much as I believe I would have been an awesome sorority member http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif I would have loved http://boards.elitefitness.com/forum...ety[1].gif to live in the house and attend sleep overs, pillow fights, and pajama parties (that is what we guys assume you ladies do when you get together, so please don't spoil it) http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/wink.gif Hmmm, sorry my mind was kind of wandering with that vision . . .
However, for all the people that may be a little taken aback by advice consider what people are really saying: The interview analogy is very valid. The first rule is don't dress in a way that takes away from yourself. Clean and neat are the basic rules of thumb. Remember that you don't know these people, so they won't know how cool you are really. So the trick is not act or dress in a way that fits a negative stereotype. Its not that people are being shallow per se, but people tend to pick something and identify you with it. Especially if they don't know you. And most of the girls won't meet you at all. So PNM 1 becomes the girl with the red hair that smiled all the time . . . to the girls that just remember seeing her. Lets say PNM 2 talks with a sorority girl and really hits it off with her . . . but it might not do much good for the girls that didn't meet her to be referring her to as, oh the girl with the dirty fingernails! Or the girl who's breasts were falling out. They aren't being mean really (most people are only truly mean to people they know) its just an identifying characteristic. Plus when someone is being disqualified for something, its not necessarily dirty fingernails . . . but if you can only take one out of three girls in front of you, and each girl has someone who met them and liked them, but one is remembered for some negative thing that stood out, I am sure its going to decrease her overall chances in a vote: by comparison to the others who seemed equally nice and cool, but the Chapter can only take one girl . . . As far as people over whelming with specifics. They are just responding to people's desire for very direct directions. For some people you can say, formal, or clean and neat and everything will take care of itself. Some people are mosre comfy with the idea of knowing the best color, or fashion combination. For guys even, formal could mean sports jacket and slacks, suit and tie, or tuxedo. |
James it does sound like you would be an awesome sorority member. our sleepovers are fun!!! LOL- too bad you can't join in.
I think that basically it comes down to the point where girls either hit it off or don't hit it off. Look nice, but not overdone. Be interested, but not overeager. Don't put our house down. I know that my sorority sisters had an experience, when I rushed, where one rushee asked if she joined our house we could change our mascot. That is not good to say. Our mascot is a symbol of pride to us so if you don't like it too bad. Girls you all sound so nervous- please get some tums or something. RUSH IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. Remeber you are all phenomenal women- read the poem by Ms. Angelou. |
James--
I would like to take this moment to emphasize that sorority women most assuredly do not have pillow fights in their underwear, Revenge of the Nerds style! |
Most of the time us sorority girls wake up on the weekends around noon and wear our pj's- baggy sweatshirts and some drawstring pj pants, maybe a t-shirt once in ahwile.
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It's not that you'll get cut because you have dirty nails. You'll get cut if that's the one thing that stood out about you!
Ladies, imho, just file your nail so that they're not jagged and throw on a coat of clear/clear glitter and leave it at that. But if you're like me, and start messing w/ your cuticles when your nervous,(ewww http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/redface.gif ) just get some gel overlays a week before rush. Then you nails will look FAB! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif ps If you're obsessing about your nails. Just about every other single thing we have mentioned is more important. Take a deep breath and RELAX! |
I can't register posts that ruin adolescent fantasies http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif
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LOL James if it makes you feel better I really DID have a pillow fight with a fellow sister. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/tongue.gif
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James,
Don't worry---None of us want to ruin your fantasies. Feel free to continue to believe that we all have pillow fights in PJ's!!! However, we also spend time doing our hair and nails while talking about boys. Moving on...I also have some swamp land in Florida for sale. :-) |
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