NPC Recruitment Change...
 

There is a part of Panhellenic recruitment that I have been thinking about. It's the part about not being eligible to pledge another sorority for one calendar year if you decline a bid offered to you. I personally think that this should be changed. Women are more transient and more fickle these days. I think allowing a woman to try and join a sorority after ONE semester would be better for Greek life...Any thoughts on this? I've been thinking about this and really think this would help with retaining girls who are interested in going Greek. A calendar year is too much time to worry about keeping her interested. We are missing out on a key market here!! Let's look at this from a marketing perspective. I rush and do not get a bid from the sorority I wanted. I will be sullen and upset for a while, but if I know that I can try again in 5 months or so, I will not be so upset, just more willing to try again. I would get the opportunity to meet more sorority sisters and get more involved on campus. ALSO, what if I find out I like XYZ sorority better than ABC that I originally wanted? I can see joining them in 5 months. But a year? That gives me too much of a chance to say "Forget Greeks" and join band instead because they accepted me...Anyone have an opposing view?

[This message has been edited by sigmagrrl (edited October 18, 2000).]

If that's true, that's EXACTLY why it should stay as it is.

People need to really think about the responsibilites Greek life entails, and not just go jumping into it. If you depledge or don't take a bid, and you have that year, it will give you a lot more time to think about what you really want, not just who has the most flash.

And there's no law saying you can't hang out with the sisters of the chapter you are interested in. If they really want you to be a part of them they will be patient!

I have to agree with 33girl.

Much Love,

Kymberleigh
Delta Delta Delta

I am with you, sigmagrrl. When I filled out my Bid Card, I was "bullied" by my Rho Chi to put down a sorority that I did not want to join (They were #7 for me out of 7 sororities.). She told me that I HAD TO put down ALL of my pref parties (we weren't allowed to decline any pref parties). I would have been better off putting down the 4 that I did want to be in, and if no bid was forthcoming, at least I would have been eligible for COB. As a result, the sorority that I did not wish to join did bid me, and I declined. Then I was stuck for a year. It was a very upsetting and devastating experience. I think to let girls try again in the next semester is a little less extreme. How I wished that I had better understood that whatever you write on your Bid Card essentially means that you will accept a bid from any of those sororities.

For those of you who oppose the 1 year hiatus, I would like to ask if you got your 1st, 2nd or 3rd choice?



[This message has been edited by CutiePie2000 (edited April 16, 2001).]

Cutie Pie,

It is supposed to say on the bid card that by signing it you agree to accept a bid from any of the above mentioned groups. That being said, the Rho Chi cannot and should not bully you into writing down more groups that you feel comfortable with. If indeed only 2 of the 3 groups you preffed were attractive to you, you should only have put down those two. On some campuses you are allowed to put down more than 3 selections. This is in the event you received more than 3 pref invitations and declined one or more with interest.

I don't know why you weren't allowed to decline a preference event invitation, that is somewhat unusual and goes against the system of mutual selection. Some campuses do that as part of their local rules, but as far as I know, it is generally frowned upon.

I accepted a bid from my #3 choice and have never regretted the decision I made almost 20 year ago. I've enjoyed long-term friendships and sisterhood and served my fraternity in many offices and capacities.

Although it is important for a woman to accept an invitation from a group she feels comfortable with, I have always believed that a person can be happy almost anywhere when the effort is made. What most potential members never think about is the fact that the chapter that offered them a bid already considers them a sister. If your 'preferred' choices had really wanted you as much as you wanted them, then you would have received a bid from that chapter.

Barbara

This is terrible! This is some Panhellenic group's misguided attempt to build up the weaker chapters but it doesn't--it makes people resentful and causes a lot of depledging. I wish you'd go into the Panhel office and tell the advisor what happened. If she ignores you, go to the VP of Student Affairs. No one should be forced into a sorority they never wanted.

Cutie Pie,

May I ask which campus this is and if all the groups on campus are NPC?

Thanks,
Barb

Yes, all groups are NPC. I will email you privately to discuss.

That being said, the Rho Chi cannot and should not bully you into writing down more groups that you feel comfortable with.

Indeed, my Rho Chi *DID* bully me into writing down a group that I was not comfortable with. I wished that I would have launched a complaint with Panhel after the fact, but I was so ignorant of how Rush worked. I wished I could have had this board as a resource...how much more capably I would have been to handle this situation.

If indeed only 2 of the 3 groups you preffed were attractive to you, you should only have put down those two. Looking back, how I wish I would have been brave and not permitted myself to be pressured and bullied.
I should have never put down a group on my Bid Card that I didn't want.

I don't know why you weren't allowed to decline a preference event invitation, that is somewhat unusual and goes against the system of mutual selection. I kept my Rush Documentation. We were NOT permitted to drop *ANY* parties. We had to attend all parties where we were invited. If I could have dropped that group, then they would not have been misled (by Panhell, not me) into thinking that I wanted them.

Until I discovered this board, I had no idea that on other campuses, Rushees can drop groups that don't interest them. I sure wish that had been the case on my campus.

I accepted a bid from my #3 choice and have never regretted the decision I made almost 20 year ago. I've enjoyed long-term friendships and sisterhood and served my fraternity in many offices and capacities. It is one thing to get your 3rd choice. It is another thing entirely to get a bid from a sorority you never wanted in the first place, but weren't permitted to drop them.

What most potential members never think about is the fact that the chapter that offered them a bid already considers them a sister. Understandably, the chapter must have thought that, since I wasn't allowed to drop them. For me to continue with Rush, it was mandatory that I attend ALL parties. I should never have been at their final party. But I HAD to be there...as dictated by the local Panhellenic's Rules.

At my school the Rho Chi's cant talk to any rushees on pref night & the girls can't talk betwwen houses. You also were'nt allowed to speak to any one in a sorority until you got your bids, the next day. I thought that was totally crazy, until I read these posts, now it makes sense.

I have heard of having to go to all your pref parties, and I think that has some validity - the sisters may be bette at connecting with a smaller group, and it could help them and the rushees alike. But as far as your bid card - that should be the rushee's choice, PERIOD. If you want to put down 3, 2, 1, or none. I recall someone saying on here that at their campus if the rushees suicided (aka intentional single preference) they were ineligible for a bid. That is just wrong.

I think carnation is right - this is a local panhellenic trying to build up the weaker sororities, and I guess that is an admirable goal. But it's wrong that if forces the rushees to go someplace they never wanted, and it's also patronizing. "Poor XYZ needs some help. Let's funnel all these extra girls there." I don't care how small my chapter was, I would NEVER want a girl to be there who felt she was "bullied" into joining. I don't care if we were her second or third choice, as long as we were HER choice.

You should know - should be told by the Rho Chis and the Greek Affairs office - that if you suicide there's a big chance you won't get a bid. But you should also know that if you put down a group you don't want there's a big chance you WILL.

CutiePie - you definitely need to go to someone in student affairs on this one. What they are doing is contrary to Panhellenic procedure.

But as far as your bid card - that should be the rushee's choice, PERIOD. If you want to put down 3, 2, 1, or none. I agree. However, at the time, I didn't feel like I had a choice. Read on...I explain below.

I recall someone saying on here that at their campus if the rushees suicided (aka intentional single preference) they were ineligible for a bid. That is just wrong.
I had no intention of suicide bidding. I wanted to put down 1 of my 2 prefs + 3 others (we were allowed to put down a total of 4). I tried to put down my 1 pref that I liked plus 3 others. (I did not attend the 3 others' prefs). My Rho Chi said I *MUST* put down BOTH of my prefs. I now know that this is wrong. But stupid, uninformed, ignorant, 19 year old me listened to her and allowed my instincts (which were saying to me, "don't put the other group down, you'll regret it") to be overridden by her.

I think carnation is right - this is a local panhellenic trying to build up the weaker sororities, and I guess that is an admirable goal. But it's wrong that if forces the rushees to go someplace they never wanted, and it's also patronizing. "Poor XYZ needs some help. Let's funnel all these extra girls there." I don't care how small my chapter was, I would NEVER want a girl to be there who felt she was "bullied" into joining. I don't care if we were her second or third choice, as long as we were HER choice. I agree. I have only learned thanks to this board that some Greek systems out there permit Rushees to drop groups that they don't want. I sure wish I had had that choice available to us.

You should know - should be told by the Rho Chis and the Greek Affairs office - that if you suicide there's a big chance you won't get a bid. But you should also know that if you put down a group you don't want there's a big chance you WILL. I now know this, and I will say again: I did not intend to suicide bid. There were 5/7 groups that I really liked. Unfortunately for me, I was made to feel that I could not drop this group.


CutiePie - you definitely need to go to someone in student affairs on this one. What they are doing is contrary to Panhellenic procedure. Unfortunately, this was a few years back, so I cannot take action to straighten this out. However, I am wiser now. What's more, I certainly learned that if I am not comfortable doing something, I will not be signing my name to it, whether it be a Bid Card, or a legal contract of some sort. I also recall that I had some questions about filling in my Bid Card, and was made to feel that I could not ask them. Rather, the mentality expressed to me was, "Don't ask questions. Just fill out the card and sign it."

Forgive me if I'm a little late coming into this, but CutiePie, did you get one of your choices the next year?

My roommate went through a similar situation. She had to put down her choices, got a bid from a house that she was hesitant about, attended half an hour of the bid day festivities and left. She waited the year and then rushed again. This time, she got a house she liked.

I was stupid and suicided my pref night. Granted, I loved my house but there will always be that part of me that wonders what could have gone differently.

I will be honest and say that when I rushed the following year (I did informal rush the next year, not formal), no, I didn't get a bid from any of the houses that I wanted. So some people might say that I never had a hope of getting into any of the other 5 houses that I wanted (and maybe that is true, but we will never know). However, there was a sorority girl who was in my "rushee class" (for lack of a better word) that I got to talking to about Rush. I told her what had happened to me and I asked her how this could have happened. She said to me (off the record) that if you rush, decline your bid, and then rush again the next year, you are kind of viewed as "damaged goods" and the other sororities won't want to bid you, for fear of souring inter-sorority goodwill. So, while I was very frustrated to hear this, at least *SOMEONE* was honest with me, and told me how "it really was".

But you did end up being in a house? Did it all turn out well in the end?

No, KarenC725, it did not turn out, and thus, I never pledged in college. Miraculously, this has not soured me from wanting to go Greek.

I am now finished with college and have been out for a few years. I am pursuing alumnae initiation. It seems to be going well. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif
I feel good about this. I know that membership is for life, and maybe the "roulette" nature of formal Rush was not for me. I feel very fortunate to have learned fairly recently that some groups do alumnae initiation. When I learned this, I felt very excited, because I thought for the longest time that since I didn't pledge an NPC group in college, I couldn't become a member. Now, I know that this is possible and I feel elated about it. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

We kind of got off topic there, so I am interested to hear some posts to the original question, which was regarding...
"It's the part about not being eligible to pledge another sorority for one calendar year if you decline a bid offered to you."

What is everyone else's thoughts on this? Would the NPC ever re-address this issue? I know that given my own personal experience, I feel that 1 year is too long.

Hey CutiePie -

I hope you didn't think I was getting on your case or implying anything (like you would suicide bid). I was addressing the bigger issue and your issue at the same time. In your case the local Panhel definitely deserves a spanking. Bad Panhel! Bad!

Does anyone know if a local Panhel can be "disciplined" by National Panhel for not following procedures, etc?

Reading all these rush stories, I see how lucky I was to a) have Greek friends before I rushed and b) live in a very pro-Greek dorm. I think I absorbed a lot of the info about rush, etc. that I needed to know through osmosis.

As far as NPC re-addressing the year wait rule - if it could be shown that it was keeping LARGE amounts of women from going Greek they might, but until then, I doubt it.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by 33girl:
Hey CutiePie -
I hope you didn't think I was getting on your case or implying anything (like you would suicide bid). Okay. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/smile.gif

I was addressing the bigger issue and your issue at the same time. In your case the local Panhel definitely deserves a spanking. Bad Panhel! Bad!
Does anyone know if a local Panhel can be "disciplined" by National Panhel for not following procedures, etc?
I guess what I'm wondering (and maybe Pnguintrax can help out with this one)... did the local Panhel actually do something wrong? (I realize now, that, at the very least, that in "bullying me", the Rho Chi did) Or was it just my own "tough luck" that the campus that I rushed on happened to have the practice of not permitting rushees to drop groups?

Reading all these rush stories, I see how lucky I was to a) have Greek friends before I rushed and b) live in a very pro-Greek dorm. I think I absorbed a lot of the info about rush, etc. that I needed to know through osmosis. I felt that I knew a lot about Rush, but I did not know anything about bid-matching, or that you can "drop out" and potentially pledge a few weeks later. I just felt that if I dropped out, people would think that I was no longer interested, and pledging a sorority that I would have been happy in was something that I really, really wanted. I guess that's why I went through Rush to the bitter end.

As far as NPC re-addressing the year wait rule - if it could be shown that it was keeping LARGE amounts of women from going Greek they might, but until then, I doubt it.Well, I will say this....I ran into 5-8 rushees after rush to ask them where they ended up. Half of them dropped out of rush (with no intention of following up with informal rush) or they declined their bid because it was a group they didn't want (because they couldn't drop either).

Another thing I wish I had known is: I wish I had known that informal rush
existed, and took place AFTER formal rush. I had NO IDEA and I figured that if I didn't do formal rush, I would have no mechanism through which to potentially pledge.

As for the original post, when and why did the NPC come up with the rule of: "Decline your bid - no eligibility for a year". Is this so that girls don't make "flippant" decisions or......?

[quote]Originally posted by CutiePie2000:
[B] I'm doing this also, and know of one other person who is pursuing this. Write me offline so we can chat about it! It will be nice to have several people we can talk to during this process.

TCSparky
future greek



[This message has been edited by tcsparky (edited October 31, 2000).]

I don't know if a Panhel can be disciplined by NPC. I think the Area Advisor (most people don't know there are greek alums who volunteer to advise college Panhel groups)would work with the campus and try to strengthen Rho Chi training.

As for alum initiation I am interested in where you live and which groups you have looked at.

I think that the one year rule should stay. It gives a girl plenty of time to really think about her decision, make sure it's right for her. Also it gives chapters a chance to really get to know a girl.

But mainly...I've always been under the impression that the rule was in place so that the CHAPTERS didn't rush dirtier than some already do. Like if a girl gets a bid from a house that she's not positive about and is thinking about DPing; and then another house says "Just drop them and we'll take you in informal." That'll kill the first house!

I've always been under the impression that the rule was in place so that the CHAPTERS didn't rush dirtier than some already do. Like if a girl gets a bid from a house that she's not positive about and is thinking about DPing; and then another house says "Just drop them and we'll take you in informal." That'll kill the first house! Ah yes, very true! I did not think of this.

About the whole waiting a year deal, girls at my school aren't usually seen as "used goods" as far as I know. But then I just became a sister, so its not like I'm a wealth of wisdom. Most girls I've talked to have taken the year to get to know sisters outside of the Rush atmosphere which helps them make a more educated choice(plus they are practically guaranteed a bid). I feel so bad for everyone who goes to the big school were they Rush is dirty and people get bullied into putting down sororities they don't want. My school's Panhel is very good about making Rush clean and the Rho Chis are great about being helpful and unbiased.

:)

This has happened to our chapter! Another chapter promises bids to potential new members telling them that if they can not take them now, they will informally rush them later, which they oftern cannot! It is a way to preveother sororites from promising what they can not deliver!

Coming from a campus where dirty rush is rampant, I can tell you that the one year rule thing can be bypassed, if the sorority to which the woman first accepted the bid and then depledged released the woman. It happens all the time on my campus. A woman things, oh I want to go to XYZ. Then she realizes that XYZ is hazing the hell out of their new members, so she says screw this and depledges. But she still wants to be in a sorority. So, she goes through informal rush the next semester, telling the women at the parties that she depledged XYZ last semester. If one of the groups she goes to really likes her, they go to the Greek Life Office and ask the Greek Advisor to ask the sorority to release her so she can pledge at the new house. And 9 times out of 10, they release the girl and she pledges.

At our campus, unlike most campuses, if a girl intentional single prefs (suicides) a sorority, she MAY NOT COB at that sorority if she does not get a bid through formal recruitment. We had a huge problem with this, where women in sororities would say, listen, suicide us, and if you don't get a bid, then come to our COB and we'll get you a bid that way. This made 2 sororities huge and the other 8 of average size. People started to wonder, and hence this rule was put in place. It's not like that at other schools I've done bid matching at. One place I did bid matching, girls preffed two sororities...nearly all the same two sororities. So, like half of them went bidless, while 5 sororities got like 2 new members each, and the other 2 sororities got 8 or 9. Then, COB started and all the girls that didn't get bids at the two "popular" houses went to their COB parties, COB'd to ceiling, and the other houses ended up getting maybe 3 or 4 more per house. What a mess!!!

Anyways, enough of my rant. Rush can be a dirty process, but Panhel does try to make things fair. If Greek Advisors do not implement rules properly and address problems, and if sororities do not work together instead of against each other for women, the systems will suffer.

*off soapbox and back to work*

I have a question...
 

Does the one year rule apply from rush to rush or from the time you depledge? At a bigger school, this could totally ruin a girl's chance of ever getting into another sorority.

I had a problem similar to this. We had some girls who depledged and wanted to pledge something else the next semester. Even though we are not in the NPC, the NPC director will not allow anyone who has previously pledged in that same year to pledge something else the next semester. As far as getting bids, I think if you really want to be in any particular sorority and that is in your heart, you will wait a year. Some people really need time to mature, because I honestly don't think pledging your first semester, freshman year is for everyone.

Re: I have a question...
 

I believe it is a year from the time you sign your bid - i.e. if you sign a bid to ABC in August and quit pledging in October, you can go through rush again next August. That's how it always worked at my school.

My freshman year you had to wait a year from the time that you depledged. What are the NPC rules?

"A woman who has had her pledge broken by an NPC fraternity, or who has broken her pledge to an NPC fraternity, may not be asked to join another NPC fraternity on the campus for one calendar year from the date she was originally pledged. However, she may be repledged by the same NPC graternity chapter at any time within that calendar year."

Arrgh
 

At my school Panhel tries to act all strict and enforce this rule of waiting a year before you can rush again, sign another bid card, etc. Funny thing is, no one ever follows this rule. A girl pledged my house, dropped out a few months later and pledged a different house like two weeks after she left my house. I was really curious as to why this could happen so I asked our Panhel rep and she told me that in our Greek Life office, they keep everyone's bid cards. They try to play it off like they have them all organized and everything. Nope! They are pretty much just thrown in to a big pile on the floor....I kid you not. How ridiculous is that? They are just organized in alphabetical stacks, but other than that, there's no real order at all! So then, if someone signs a bid card, and then signs another one at a different sorority, they'll never have any idea, since there are thousands of students on my campus who are Greek. They just shove it in the the alphabet pile it belongs in, and move on! Hmmph....I think someone needs to get to organizing that room! :p

Well, my take on the original question is yes, i think lessening the time to one semester, or four months would be acceptable for someone who has signed her pref card but does not want to sign her bid card. (is that right?....no formal rush at my school) Since it seems that many women are still misled, or just don't know, that they don't have to put 3 choices or that they can drop out.

However, it should remain a year for a woman who depledges. ie signs her bid card to become a new member then disassociates.

writing to your NPC delegate would prolly be the best way to get them to look at this.

Most greek advisors will allow a woman who declined a bid/resigned her plegeship to rush during the next calendar year. So if they don't accept in Sept they can go thru formal next August.

I wholeheartedly agree with the rule that a woman should not be allowed to COB a group if she suicides and does not receive a bid. There's a girl at my school who suicided another chapter and went to every COB this chapter had. They still did not bid her, yet she kept coming and coming. Meanwhile she has many friends in my chapter and we'd love to get to know her better. She still thinks that she has a chance to join this group she suicided. Furthermore, the sad thing is that members of this chapter have told everyone but her that they don't like or want her. If she were not allowed to COB them, perhaps she would open up her eyes to see the other two sororities on campus.

I also did not know about releasing. I assume that this only applies to women who do not accept bids, not to those who depledge? There are another two girls on my campus who declined bids from this same chapter and are now waiting the year to come join us. If this option were available... hmm. There are countless others who have lost interest in GLO's as a whole. If you depledge, however, I think you should have to wait the year. It's rather fickle to switch so quickly and if a woman wanted to do that and come join us, I would question her loyalty. That said, I think we have to agree that the bid matching system is not infallible and that a woman, given the night to think on it, might make a different decision in the morning.

I was unaware that campus panhellenic was allowed to pick and choose which green book rules it follows. I know that my campus does not follow all of them, and it irritates me to no end. I really think that NPC does a good job of keeping rush fair, and there's no reason to decide whether or not you're going to follow something, especially the unanimous agreements.

[Scheming to get my hands on a Green Book...]

If you want, you can order one from NPC. Go to the NPC web site ( http://www.npcwomen.org/ecommerce/online_form.htm) and get the order form.

I know I am a little late to this discussion, but....

When I went through rush, I knew a girl who put one sorority as her first choice and then my sorority as her second choice. She went to bid day and spent the entire day CRYING. She did not participate in any of the activities they were having. She basically sat in a room while sisters tried to console her and help her feel that her decision was the right one. She told them that she was going to depledge because she was that unhappy. They recognized how unhappy she was and called panhel, the greek advisor, and my chapter's president (bc she said that she wanted to be Phi Mu) and released her from her bid. She came to our house the very next day to join our class and was happy as a clam! I guess my house had done the same in the past for someone else who wanted to join their sorority. I think it was really great for them to realize that she wasn't happy. They could have been really "bi***y and made her wait another year. By that time, I am sure she wouldn't have wanted to be greek (we have sophomore deferrment, so she would have been a junior).

.I rushed last year, some of you may remember me. I was dropped by my "dream house" after theme night. I only preffed one house and my PX and I had a very long talk about whether or not I should sign my bid card or just withdraw. I decided to give the house a chance and signed my card. The sorority I preffed did give me a bid. I only lasted about 2 weeks in the chapter, I never even pledged. Some of the sisters, not all of them, weren't very welcoming. I was literally left out and left behind from many activities. I talked to the New Member Educator on several occasions during the time I was in the chapter. I was released from the chapter and wanted to go for the house I originally wanted. The sisters from that house were shocked when I didn't show up for Pref night because they thought I was invited back. I have waited an entire year and I plan to rush that sorority during COB. I have kept in touch with those sisters and have made even more friends in that chapter because of them. I knew where I belonged, but as they say hindsight is 20/20

I don't think it's really "legal" to pick and choose what rules from the Green Book you should be following. If you have more than 2 NPC sororities on your campus and have a college panhellenic, you should be following the Green Book. Also, if you're a collegiate chapter that doesn't have a Green Book, I would advise contacting your national or international HQs immediately and acquiring one :) If you're in Canada, I think it's a different color though :)