Multiple Q's: Medical leave, letters of support...
 

Hey, everyone!

So I'm looking to go to a Big 10 school this fall (though not one where recs are required - will get them though :)). I'm looking into the sorority recruitment process, and I've had a few questions come up:

1) I had to take a year of medical leave earlier in high school, so I'll be a year older, and I'll have 1997 in my recruitment forms, I guess. Do you think it'd hurt me in any way, since I'm supposed to be a sophomore, and should I bring it up? I'm already planning to talk about this with my recommenders, but what about mentioning this during open houses/invites?

2) I'm also thinking I might have to bring up being out of school anyway, due to the impact it had on my cumulative GPA, which meets all the requirements, but is not something I'm proud of. And if so, would it be better framed more ambiguously as "medical leave," or should I be more honest to sisters and delve into mental illness related areas, or is that a tricky area? *EDITED for clarity: what I went through is definitely not something I'd bring up myself, but I've found that with half the people this comes up with, they tend to ask for specifics, just out of curiosity really. I don't mind usually, but in the context of rush, I really don't know what I should say if I get a follow up question about the "medical leave."

3) I've been hearing about letters of support, but I'm still a bit confused on whether they'd be good or just annoying at a school that already isn't that big on recs. I'm also wondering when they'd have to go out and how they're different from letters of recommendation.

Thank you for all your insight!

Hey! I had a gap in my education as well (a year off between high school and college), due to medical reasons that necessitated a major operation. Funny, but no one ever asked me about it - maybe because I was a year younger to begin with so by the time I started college I was the "right" age? When it did come up (after recruitment was over), I just said "I had to have an operation on my spine" and that pretty much satisfied people's curiosity (not that very many people were curious, actually!). You might be worrying about something that won't come up at all.

Anyway, I think there is such a thing as "oversharing" and "too much information". And in the busy-ness of recruitment parties, you want to maximize your positive interactions and not delve into the super serious stuff. You really don't have that kind of time. That's my opinion, of course.

More concerned about your GPA. Can you take a college class or two during summer school to show that you can handle college level work?

Agree with AZTheta. I don't think that folks are going to ask you why you are a freshman but are the age of a sophomore. I really don't.

I've already signed up for two semester credit (though I don't intend to seek credit), self-paced college classes actually, and I've been on the rebound grades wise ever since I went back to school, so I'm feeling good about them. From your experience, do you think marks on these could be factored into my recruitment info GPA? Also PMed you a little more about this situation, as it's a little complicated. Thanks!

College courses won't be factored into a high school GPA. I speak from experience. HOWEVER YMMV, waiting to hear if other GCers have something different to say about this.

There are a million reasons why a freshman wouldn't be exactly 18. I wouldn't sweat that at all. I mean, unless you're 23. Then you likely would not fit into a Big 10 sorority type environment. But 19 or 20? I don't see that as a huge problem.

But you said you are on the rebound grades-wise. I want to caution you that all the sororities have pretty stiff GPA requirements and below which they have virtually no wiggle room, regardless of good reasons. So just be aware that you may get cut heavily if you are on the bubble, grades-wise. Don't let that ruin your rush experience and just be happy and enthusiastic about the options you do have.

It appears to me that all of the Big 10 schools have thriving Greek systems right now so be open to all of your choices. And many of them have new chapters (sadly, Iowa and Northwestern are not among them. yet), so be open to the newer chapter that may be smaller. They'll be fine so don't let it scare you away.

I'm gonna assume we aren't talking about IU, because that's a different beast.

For the others, nobody cares about age. They do care about GPA. Get recs, and ask your rec writers to explain the situation.

If your GPA meets the minimums, but isn't stellar, you may be viewed as a grade risk. If a group has a rec in hand that says "she's great, had a weird circumstance senior year, that's resolved," they are going to be more comfortable taking that chance.

Even so, be prepared for having fewer options than other PNM's. I will say that the Big Ten has some of the best Greek systems (I'm biased!), and every chapter is great. While you will see/hear tier nonsense on every campus, everyone is over that nonsense three weeks after recruitment and it comes down to having something in common with students in all GLO's.

Thanks! The school in question isn't IU, so I'm actually wondering how many recs I could do before getting annoying. Also, in your opinion, by how much would a GPA have to exceed the requirement to be out of "grade risk" territory?

One rec for each chapter is excellent.
Two recs is good but unnecessary.
Three would be weird.


*For the Big 10

Depends on the school. Check their overall PH average. Should be on their web site under the Greek Life area. They usually have that information out there for the public.

Thanks! I've seen the PH average but couldn't find info on averages involving non-college GPAs. I'm somewhat aware of where the minimums fall, but not how far away the "safe zone" is from these minimums. I called the Greek office about this, but the person who answered wasn't sure, and I'm guessing I should not try to contact the individual chapters?

No. What I'm saying is look at the chapter GPA vs the minimum requirement and see how you fit in. If the min is 2.5, the chapter GPA 3.5 and you are at 2.5, odds are they will drop you. If the min is 3.0 and chapter GPA is 3.5 and you are at 3.2 , odds are better. They don't want to pledge someone who has the potential off the bat to negatively impact their GPA. That's how they look at it. Doesn't matter about HS vs college for for freshmen. College GPA only comes in to play for upperclass PNMs. They assume that most freshmen will have a fall off fall semester so they want the highest they can get so that 3.9 HS GPA PNM won't fall too far and drag their GPA down. The higher the chapter GPA, the higher your GPA needs to be.

Thank you! And letters of support shouldn't be bothered with? This school also isn't a very common destination in my area, and so I was really excited when I learned that a friend had a cousin who went and was a recent graduate and Greek. Whether I decide to go through this year or do it next year, I definitely want to reach out to her. Would it be correct to say that a rec from a recent grad who actually went to the same school would be the most powerful kind? Also trying to determine the strength of current collegian recs from other schools, as I also have some friends who could speak about my situation, though one's chapter was kicked off campus (probably not that one...).

Letters of support are pretty regional with Texas having the highest percentage. My group doesn't even have such a thing - other than in Texas. So just the recs unless you are in Texas is probably fine.

And the most powerful rec is from someone who has known you for several years - family friend, coach, teacher, etc. Some groups don't accept collegian signed recs so you would need to check that with the rec writer as well.

IMO the person who knows you the best is going to be the best rec.

Let's be honest, anything lower than a 3.0 coming out of high school is going to be a grade risk at a Big 10 school.

I think I could have that pinned down (very good friend at other school who's in a sorority that allows collegian recs) for one sorority, but it seems like for others, I'd have to look for recs from those who don't know me personally. So I guess I was wondering if in that case, it might make for a better case to search for recent alums of specific chapters at the school (maybe through my high school's own past matriculation records) in addition to going through a regional network, so that I could have somewhat of same town and high school connection (and so those who read the recs could be all, "Oh, this recommender was a chapter sister!"), as I am OOS. I'm not sure how common this is, however, and I wouldn't want to come off as creepy or anything like that.

Recs do not have to be from the same chapter that will becreceiving the rec, just a member in good standing of that particular sorority.i have written recs for PNMs I did not know well. I invited them to meet me for coffee and talked with them. If I felt comfortable I would write a rec. Try that approach.

You'll need to network with any adult you know who went to college. Parents' friends, neighbors, employers, teachers, parents of friends, etc. When you find someone to write one, ask if they know someone in other groups. This is a heavy networking operation. And you can check the national orgs FB web sites for local alumnae chapters as well. You never know who you know and don't realize they are Greek.

The second best rec comes from someone who knows someone who knows you personally. For example, I have close friends in other NPC groups, and if they are willing to write a rec to their org for a PNM they know, I am definitely willing to write one to my org, because I trust their judgment.

And as you'll see in all of the rec advice threads, you know more sorority women that you think you do, we promise.

But remember, recs are generally not required at Big 10 schools. They can be helpful and if you've got good people to write them, then great. But digging up some rando just so you can have that box checked is not necessary like it is in other parts of the country. If you want to have them for as many chapters as possible I would start beating the bushes to see who you know because you probably know more Greek women than you think. But you're not doomed without them.

Thank you :) As an out-of-stater, do you think it would be more strategic to beat the bushes around the area my college is in rather than around home? Greek life is big in my area, though not my family, and you're definitely right in saying I probably know more Greek women than I think. I think I'm just worried it would probably be a weaker "know" anyway around home, like so-and-so from history's mother.

Wherever you can get the closest connection. We don't know where that is. And "so and so from history's mom" is not what you think. It's "we've known her and her family for x years." Please don't presume what we on this side see as connections. Beat the bushes and line them up. You'll be fine. If you were coming to Bama it would be different. But you aren't.

Except for the currently in chapter or very recently graduated members, the relationship to the specific chapter doesn't matter. The best connection to YOU is what matters, not to the chapter. Part of your membership for a lifetime responsibility and reward is you are considered an equal member, whether you went to MOST COMPETITIVE U or just barely a 4 year college that has sororities. I've never heard of anyone looking at a rec and saying, well THIS one is from Everyone's Heard of it U but that one came from Never Heard of it U so this one counts for more than that one.

I can think of particular chapters at the University of Texas and Ole Miss who would feel this way.

But, for the overwhelming majority of chapters you are 100% correct.

Really?

Oh yeah! And Alabama also.