Blackball
 

I was just curious if any of you have personally been responsible for blackballing a PNM during recruitment.

I would like to fess up and say yes I have. Here is the story behind it.

About 15 years ago my mom was driving down the road and there was a girl riding a bike wearing headphones and she swerved out in the road right in front of my mom. My mom obviously hit her. The girl walked away with a few minor cuts and bruises and her parents tried to sue my mom. She shouldn't have been riding in the road at her age in the first place and she certainly shouldn't have been riding with headphones on.

Anyway, a couple years ago she showed up during formal sorority recruitment and kind of gave me dirty looks. I found out from a Rho Chi (not from my organization) that she had been talking trash about me saying how my mom was lucky that she didn't get sued.

So yep I blackballed her...

Would you have done the same thing?

i have "blackballed" people...few example: a freshman who got really really trashed one night and decided that she was in love with my boyfriend and told me to "F-off" bc she thought she was hotter....gone. a girl that had no idea what org. i was in who told me that my org. sucked bc it wasn't southern enough for her (she never did recieve a bid from anyone), and the girl who came to a frat party one night that i had known from hs. and she decided that she felt the need to call me a slut....she was gone too.

I've never really "blackballed" anyone, but this past year a girl came through rush who was not the most popular rushee- she had a history with several sisters of approaching their boyfriends (all members of one fraternity) WHILE MY SISTERS were standing with them and a)grabbing their package and saying obscene things b) jumping on them and wrapping her legs around their waist and saying obscene things, and c) lifting her shirt and asking "Wanna play?" This girl was cut immediately. Peace out...

I did, however, talk to one girl during rush this year who did not get a favorable evaluation from me- we were chatting and I asked what she was interested in at school (classes, field of study, etc) and she looked at me and said, "Oh.... yeah, well, I don't really do school." Um okay... then I'm afraid we don't really do you.

We never used a blackball per se and I don't believe that one vote could keep a girl out. However, when one person (alum or active) does have majorly serious concerns about a PNM, the chapter needs to listen.

I have sent a no-rec twice. I had accompanied 3 high school Girl Scouts to Asia and one spent all her time trying to hook up with every sailor she saw. After spending 3 weeks dragging her butt out of trouble, I definitely could not see her wearing the arrow.

The other time was recently when I felt that a PNM our family knew was seriously disturbed. My AOII daughter likewise sent a letter of warning to her chapter at that school. The PNM did manage to pledge a sorority but was depledged by the group for bizarre behavior.

We didn't ballball. I tried to prevent someone from getting a bid, but it didn't work. She received a bid and within a few weeks everyone told me that I was right. It didn't make me feel very good. It was a bad situation.

I had a friend my freshman year who did something pretty sh*tty to me.

I was willing to let it go and just never speak to her again, but my friends and boyfriend were so appalled they told everyone in the greek system they could get their hands on what she'd done to me. Consequently, when she went thru rush the following fall, she was cut from every single house after the first round.

I didn't agree with what my friends were doing and told them so at the time, but I also can't say she didn't deserve it. We were best friends and if she'd do something to me--who's to say she wouldn't have turned on her sisters too?

When Hubby was active, one pledge was blackballed before initiation. He was a DOG. He lied to and stole from his brothers, stole tests from the files and sold them, and forced himself on a girl.
Everyone on campus heard about this, it wasn't a secret.
I've never done it however.

Re: Blackball
 

hell yes!!

for guys its kinda different. in phi psi we actually have blackballs...i cant tell you about it, but we can blackball pledges. you could be half way through your pledge semester, then POW you're gone. it only takes one.

i have seen it happen...it sucks sometimes.

We didn't use blackballs in my chapter--in fact, we were not even allowed to verbalize negative remarks about PNM's in front of the chapter at all. We could no-comment, which was basically as good as a negative remark, but if we had serious concerns about a girl, we had to write it down and give it to the bid committee to consider. Usually, such a note was given great weight in the bid committees decisions, but occasionally, they were made by sisters without much respect, so they were sometimes disregarded, though rarely.

The most dramatic instance that I would call a blackballing--was when we cut a PNM who had been arrested the prior summer for boating while intoxicated--the case was still pending, but she was 17 at the time of the accident, and a guy was killed, and she was a known party girl. She didn't mention it on her registration form (of course), but one of our sisters was from the neighboring town and had heard all about it from the local papers. She ended up not getting a bid from anyone.

We don't have any "blackballing" per se. And I would say the reason for that it is because one person doesn't acquire enough power to do that. During "pros and cons", you can "con" a PNM. That way your opinion is out there. Mind you, it's always said that if you didn't meet a girl personally, and other sisters did, you should trust their judgement!

ok, I'm a little confused about this blackballing thing... 1.) does this mean that person is prevented from getting a bid during that rush, or from that house ever? 2.) this may be diff. for each org., but is it only 1 person that has to "blackball" some one, or more than 1? lol, sorry- this is just a little confusing :p

Blackballing in my fraternity is as simple as one "no" vote on a silent ballot. There are some exceptions but that's generally how it goes.

Other houses I know vary some require 3/4 or 4/5 for initiation.

Get rid of em'
 

From what I read all of the blackballed girls had reason to be subject to that, blackballed. For my chapter we do 3/4 but if the big brother or some brother that gets mad respect says he has a problem with a pledge more then likely they are gone. Man I have a story about this one clown who had nothing but lie after lie after lie, and cared nothing for his pledge brothers, however I can't go into detail. Trust me you'd laugh....I'm laughing thinking about it:D
-PROPHET

[COLOR=darkred]FKT

Well, I can't really talk about our voting, but generally it takes more than one no vote.

However, let's say I know something really awful about Suzi Rushee. She went to my high school and, oh, stalked all these guys, and ten men have restraining orders against her. Rather than ruining her reputation by spreading this around and getting people to vote no, I could mention this to the committee running voting, and they would have the power to remove her from our lists. But it better be a pretty serious complaint - "she has ugly hair" is not good enough.

My roommate from the dorm this past year once told me that someone she and her sister knew had been blackballed from all sororities on campus. When I asked her why, she was just like, "Because she depledged." Coming from the girl who always thought she knew everything, this deserved a big eye roll from me. I informed her that that's not really a good enough reason to be blackballed, people depledge all the time. In fact, a girl in my pledge class had accepted a bid from a sorority the year before last and after a little while, decided it wasn't for her. So last year, she went through informal rush and pledged at my house. Lol, no blackballing there. That shut my roommate up! ;)

I haven't been through formal yet, and I don't think we can really blackball, anyway, but I have another story about another guy I know...

There was this guy who went through formal rush his freshman year. He got a bid to Sig Ep (a really good fraternity at USC). After knowing him for a little while, I couldn't see why they'd give him a bid, and then I thought back to when I first met him, and I could see why...

He was a decent-looking guy, from California, extremely wealthy, and made very good first impressions. The problem was, after a while the guys noticed things about him that were NOT right. He was just... uh... a little odd. So, eventually they balled him. Now, I don't know the whole story, one of my good friends is Sig Ep, but he's very good about keeping the whole secrecy of the fraternity, but I could tell that he was really mad at this guy and couldn't stand him... apparently after he got balled, he was really bitter about it and did nothing but trash the fraternity for a long time...

But, the story is not over. This guy went through rush again, and this time went DU. Well, I don't know any DU's, so I'm really unsure of the story, but apparently either he didn't get a bid, or got balled from this fraternity as well.

So, third time's a charm? He's currently pledging another fraternity, and he's hung on so far, but he's had quite a few little "talks" with the president (who happens to be my ex-boyfriend and the guy's big brother) and has come really close to being balled. I told my ex that taking him would be a big mistake, but he just replied "we believe in giving everyone a chance." Apparently, though, a lot of the brothers can't stand him... In my opinion, he's making this other fraternity look really bad, but apparently one of the brothers is really fighting to keep him in.

A sister of mine (who was um, shall we say a little feisty?) went beyond balling a girl from our chapter - she got her banned from all 11 NPC groups? Apparently she messed with my friends bf back home...we all know the story, and my friend made an effort of personally contacting someone in EACH sorority to explain the predicament to cut her round one. <LOL> Her reasoning? She couldn't bear even crossing paths with her one night at a frat house!!! Well, we will never know if she was cut from everyone but she never pledged.... and we never saw her out.


Also, we had to ball a new member just hours after she was supposed to be intiaited... She told our new member ed. that she had to miss initiation for a family reunion that had been planned for a year... then went to a frat. date party!!!! Stupid move, since the pledge ed and about 6 others girls went to same one, but left right after intiation and got there in time.....

Don't let the door hit ya on the way out!!!

Okay, so we don't really "black ball" in my sorority, but like others have said if you had a really big issue with a girl you could tell it to say the chapter Advisor, and President, and that would be taken in to consideratio. However in my opinion If even one girl in my sorority feels uncomfortable with a PNM, for valid reasons of course, then that's reason enough to cut her. Obviously not if you don't like her hair or something, but something sustantial. I myself have said I don't want that girl wearing my letters, I'm glad that my sisters trusted my judgement enough to cut that girl from our list.

Yeah, we had a girl skip initiation for a fraternity's mountain weekend... she's no longer with us. Funny thing was, I was invited to the same fraternity's mountain weekend, and had to turn it down b/c of initiation... did she really think I wouldn't find out, though?

Just wanted to add something that's kind of off the subject, but not...
When I went through, I cut a sorority just because a girl in their sorority had a "slutty" reputation... so I think it's important to make sure who's wearing your letters is right.

I can't believe the girl thought she would get away with it - the pledge ed, WHOM she lied to, was dating a guy in the house at the time. And EVERY other girl who went waited to go - it wasn't like this girl didn't have a way of getting there. It showed us where her priorities were......

we had a new girl skip out on initiation bc she had spent the night at a frat house and "forgot" to get up.....she never was initiated.

like most of the other people on this board, it usually takes more than one person to have serious issues with a person. "bad hair" and "food stuck in her teeth" are not good reasons.

With us, it is 3/4 by secret ballot. Of course, given that our chapters tend to be smaller than those of many other fraternities, it may not take that many "no" votes to prevent a 3/4 "yes" vote.

We don't have black balls per se. It takes more than one. If you get a certain number during pledge ship then you're red balled. usually if a brother has a big enough problem with you, then he's not the only one and you'll be voted out. But, we're pretty selective in who we give bids to, so thats rarely an issue.

"and she looked at me and said, "Oh.... yeah, well, I don't really do school." Um okay... then I'm afraid we don't really do you."


HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! I laughed SOOOOO hard about that! There's one of them at every rush.....

~ Jacquelyn

This is basically how it's done at my chapter, too, unless they've changed the process in the past few years since I've been away.

I personally never wrote in about any rushee. There was one girl who went through Rush several times, informally as well as formally, who I would have written in about if I'd needed to. She had been kicked out of her dorm during her first quarter as a freshman for starting a fight with another resident and had to drop out of Rush mid-week. By the time she was allowed to return to campus, everyone in Panhellenic pretty much knew the story. Giving her a bid just wasn't an option after that. She ended up pledging a local sorority and was kicked out by them for some bizarre behavior before initiation.

Hm. So we vote on a girl once, basically - whether or not to give her a bid. But once she has a bid, she's in. We never have to vote on her again. She could be kicked out by standards board for grades or something, but not by vote.

Several people have mentioned black balling someone during their pledge period. How does that work? I know ZBT does sabre-ing, but they don't have a pledge period, so I'd imagine that's different.

I would call it depledging...

Every week during the active member meeting we discuss how pledge is going and how the girls are doing. The pledge educators usually meet with each individual girl, outside of their normal meeting, to make sure things are going okay and to express concerns voiced by other members and pledges. If there are any serious concerns we take action.

Since I joined we have only depledged one girl. Another girl voluntarily depledged before we could depledge her. She got her sh*t together and we invited her to pledge the following year and now she is an alumna.

One week before initiation we have a final vote on all of the girls...basically speak now or forever hold your peace.

We have two votes, both by secret ballot after discussion, both by the entire chapter: one to offer a bid and one, toward the close of the probationary member period, to approve initiation. A 3/4 majority is required for both votes. Less than 3/4 majority on the first vote and no bid is offered; less then 3/4 majority on the second one and the probationary member is not initiated.

We had a girl come through formal rush one year who wanted to join a sorority - ANY sorority - but for all the wrong reasons... she thought it would make her instantly popular, give her an instant circle of friends, and give her the opportunity to meet fraternity guys. We had a lengthy discussion over whether to invite her to pref (I wasn't the only person who thought she wouldn't make a good sister) and we finally voted not to invite her. A few weeks later, she came through informal rush... we had another lengthy discussion, and finally voted not to offer her a bid. In that second discussion I made some comments... so I guess you could say that I'm a large part of why she's not a member.

In my org, once you get a bid, you're in. There's no second vote about whether to initiate each new member, although a girl can be asked to depledge if she, for instance, does something illegal.