Pref Ceremony
 

hey guys its me again!
i was wondering if anyone has any awesome pref ideas. i mean ideas that really got you when you put on or went through formal rush. i beleive that to be a very important day and would really like to improve our pref night! thanks
Erica Brown
Sigma sigma sigma social chair
epsilon kappa

My chapter always did (and I believe will continue to do) a song that's really meaningful and sentimental to the sisters. We also have always had some sisters read little things they have written about what Sigma means to them (and they're usually tearjerkers). I know this is what got me, because I was really not even sure I was going to join a sorority before that night, but it was really special and I could see how close the sisters were... and I know several of the newer members felt the same way! These are probably really obvious ideas, but I think that if the PMs can see how much the sorority means to each of its members, then that will make them want to be a part of it.

P.S. Of course the girls' reactions gave us a better idea of who was really interested and who wasn't (i.e. if they showed emotion it was a good sign, if they stood stone-faced it usually wasn't) ;)

Pref Ideas
 

We always have Sisters bring a couple of Sigma items (crafts from retreat, their badge, Big/Lil' gifts, etc.) that mean a lot to them and have them talk about it. It's kind of an individual way to relate those really special Sigma memories to the girls at preference. Good luck on recruitment!

Sigma Love and Mine,

Laura
Zeta Mu Chapter

i did not go through formal rush (got an open bid) but when i went through informal rush as a member ... we did the wish pearls.

anne

cont.
 

we also stood in a circle and all the members told why sigma sigma sigma is important.... i dont know if these are done with all chapters.
but it really meant a lot to me when informal rush came around and i got to tell the rushes why i love tri sigma so much

anne:)

I just went through formal rush last semester. Of course I knew what I wanted from day one, but of the two (we are only allowed to go to two) pref parties I went to that day, Sigma's seemed to be the most meaningful, I thought it just showed the true siterhood that we share.

We had a candelight, and of course, since it was pref it was formal. Each of the girls shared what Sigma meant to them and how it has changed their lives, until we got to one of the girls and she proceeded to read an entry from her journal. I don't remember what it was about, but I all the girls were crying at the end of it. And not that fake cry, but an honest, "I take you guys forgranted" cry.

That isn't what really got me, what realy got me was the sincerity in the girls eyes. It showed me how much they loved what they were a part of and what they were thinking. :D

I would just like to give a few words of advice...

I was the "wordsmith" of the chapter, the one that was always gung-ho, Suzy Sigma. THIS IS THE WOMAN YOU WANT TO SPEAK AT PREF!! I wrote deep, thought provoking, tear invoking things and spoke so eloquently and from the heart, I had even the most hardened sisters crying EVERY PREF! I assisted any other sister with her speech by asking specific questions, getting her to remember that place in her heart that drew her to Tri Sigma...

PREF IS THE KEY COMPONENT! Our last time to convince the women we want as our sisters that they want to become our sisters...

Also, simplicity is very important...We decorated the rooms with white lights (the small Christmas tree kind), candle light, white table cloths, and our silver punch bowl and serving tray. Trophies and brag boards won't quite do it anymore. This is when you come down to the simple, no holds barred "this is who we are, we love each other, and we want to embrace you too" level. You could have sisters bring their personal photos (we always brought framed ones because there was most likely a story behind the picture). We liked to sit more one on one with the women at some point, get to know each invitee and get her to know us...

On a very personal note: Hugs ALWAYS went a long way too (but only if you were comfortable and you could sense the PNM was as well) I'm a big hugger, so I encouraged it always!!!

PREF
 

Actually, I don't think you can hug a PNM anymore, that's a Panhellenic rule. Sorority members and PNMs cannot have any physical contact, and since the Recruitment Counselors are in the room during Pref, it would be a bad idea to hug a PNM and get stuck with the fine from Panhellenic.

Other than that, these are great ideas and advice on Pref, I think I'll definitely be bringing it back to my chapter. AX chapter, we always, say something to inspirational to the PNM we pref as they leave, something like, "Anybody would be lucky to have you." Anything like that, just be careful not to sound like you're promising them a bid.

SLAM,
Courtney

Re: PREF
 

LORD, YOU CAN'T EVEN HUG?? Wow, that's actually really saddens me :( If this is a rule, then by all means stick by it. I don't want any of our chapters getting in trouble...

AND Recruitment Counselors are in the room now too?? GEEZ!

Erica - Hi this is a sister from Alpha Xi down at Whitewater! Its so funny - I'm new on this board and we could have just met last Sat. at Founders Day and not even have realized! I am not the recruitment chair, but one thing that we do every semester is after dinner we all line the halls with everything dark except each sister has a white candle lit. The officers begin leading the girls through the house and we sing a song very close to our chapters heart (Halls of Ivy) I know several girls in our chapter say that was the deciding factor for them. The pearl ceremony is also a tradition here. As far as what the other girls said about hugging and such - I don't believe this is a rule here - as long as it is during the event. Also, we don't have the RC's in the room at pref. Maybe its a local thing? If you have anymore questions or want to get in touch with our recruitment chair just let me know and I will be more than happy to forward you her info!!!

SLAM

Our pref night is our strongest night by far and usually is the reason they choose Sigma.

We always have two rooms. One set up for "preffing" where we are each assigned one girl to talk one on one with, and the Pearl Room. Both rooms are decorated beautifully with candles, white Christmas lights, tool, tinsel, scapbooks, and momentos (each sigma brings two meaningful momentos). We also serve cake and punch. All of the active members dress up in black dresses and badges. Towards the end, every girl goes around and says what Sigma means to them. We also do a "pearl ceremony" and candlelight. We usually sing three songs (through out the night), Violets, Pass it on, and Friends. It is really amazing. As they leave, we give them purple and white bracelets with the poem, Tradition of Sisterhood, attached.

I think the best part of pref night is the sence of belonging that we portray.

We always do the pearl drop..its so beautiful with the candles and everything. We hum usually "In the light" as the girls come in. Usually we also have special speakers that say things about Sigma and what it means to them. Its simple, elegant, and probably one of my favorite events...the love in that room I swear could break the walls.

And we always hug..we are a hugging-photo taking group of girls in general so its almost like breathing for us!:)

question to everyone....

for pref... black or white?

We always did black formal/ semi formal dresses (normally we all got matching garters to wear under our dresses so we would have something "matching" to remind us we were all in it together), but I have been told by others who went through pref the years I was involved (96-00) that they found the black to be a turn off, that it was "intemidatingand depressing". I do know that several other chapters on campus went to white dresses for this same reason.

I got to thinking about this my junior year because we decorated the room with white tablecloths, white tulle, ivy, white christmas lights, purple punch, white/purple cake, white/purple candles and violet/ white centerpeices and in this beautiful room we looked like we were going to a funeral! I asked some of the older sisters why we wore black and they said they didn't know why, we just always had.

Is there a standard order/ requirements for pref parties? Also do any chapters you know of vary from black?

anyone have any opinions/ thoughts on this one?

IOB,
amellia

We have always done black..and honestly I have to say I am not sure why either. Perhaps it is to signify how important the ceremony is and to show respect, thats what I have always taken it as. I see black as a very formal serious color, so I like to think of wearing black at pref as respect. We usually go with lighter decorations and everyone has a variation on how they dress in black. One girl had just gotten a pair of candy red Stuart Weizman pumps and decided to sport those at my last pref...it definately jazzed up the place:p

Since we don't have a house on the campus I came from we would have to walk to a private lounge on campus in order to perform ritual and initiation. We would always get looks as 30 girls came across campus dressed in white. So in that respect, I like the black a lot better

I love pref...I am hoping to go back this year as an alumni to help out.

From what I remember (Since I'm newish) we wore black. I was thinking that maybe you all could wear a matching accessory in purple or white to make it less ...black?

We always wore black while I was a collegian, but sisters were free to choose the style of outfit they wore (just as long as it was badge attire). We wore badges, and I always wore a pearl necklace that a chapter sister made for me. :) I always thought it looked really classy, as you can never go wrong with a classic black dress.

Besides, we had pink punch at preference, and so if we spilled or splashed a little onto a black dress, it wouldn't be as bad as if it had been a white dress. ;)

Sigma Love and Mine,
Laura

we always did all black (hose, dress and shoes) and the only thing we could wear was an engagement ring and your badge. we also had french twists that matched also. I guess it just seemed so blah next to what I have seen other chapters do....

of course being a klutz the black when drinking/ eating makes sense!

My chapter writes preference letters to the potentials. A sister is chosen (or volunteers) to write a letter to a certain potential. These letters usually include what Sigma means to the Sister and other meaningful things. If the potential ends up joining Sigma, they get their preference letter back to put in their scrapbook. I still have my letter, which was written by my best friend of 10 years. She joined Sigma the semester before me, so I was able to learn about Sigma before I went through recruitment.

Pref Day