Letter to my National, tell me what you think?
 

Good Evening Brothers:

During Townsend University's recolonization a pledge (new colony member) died from spinal meningitis. There was much mention of this on the former listserv. Since that listserv is now dead, I am unable to look up his name. I apologize for that lack.

At the time I asked a DGM whether that person would be initiated posthumously with the chapter. He said NO. When it came time for their charter to be granted, I asked a DGM involved with Installation whether the poor man would be initiated, and he said NO also.

If he has been initiated please disregard this message and accept my apologies for wasting your time. If not please consider the following:

Simple human decency requires that we initiate this man. This is beyond any consideration of “Brotherhood,” I am talking about just living up to those qualities that we universally believe exemplifies a “good” human being. If there is no current mechanism to do this, we need to invent one.

I am a chapter founder (primary and original organizer) and I can say without hesitation that I would not have accepted membership in Kappa Sigma or any organization if they chose to deny membership to the least of my men, even if I hated him as an individual, that died in such a tragic manner while seeking entry into the Order. I would have immediately looked for another fraternity that would not have a callous disregard towards a youthful death.

This is the way I was taught to view the world both in terms of fairness and my responsibility as a leader of people that trust me. I make no criticism of the Leaders and Brothers at Townsend.

If this person has not been initiated yet, it reflects poorly on ALL of us as human beings. And we need to immediately rectify this. If the National Officers are worried about the cost, I will happily pay the dead man’s initiation fees myself. And I wager I could find volunteers to do the initiation.

We could do it in a very meaningful way at the leadership conference this summer. We could send a nice letter of respect from the fraternity, to his family, with a Framed certificate of initiation. Again, I would be glad to cover the costs.

I believe his parents would be touched. And I have no special knowledge as to what we experience after death, but if there is a part of us that survives and cares, I believe that part of him would be touched also, and perhaps those Kappa Sigs that have gone before us would welcome him.

I am interested in any feedback that leads to an immediate plan of action to get this man initiated, but I am proposing that we do it at the leadership academy that has Townsend in it this summer.
Brothers, the Universe is an unfair and uncaring place. That is why it is important for us do what we can to diminish that unfairness. This presents us with an easy step in that direction. I challenge all of US to do the right thing. Thank you for your time.

Semper,

James

that was lovely, send it.

TG

sounds good to me, but where is townsend university? do you mean towson in maryland?

I think he should be initiated. So maybe he could not go through the ceremony because he has died, but he no doubt worked just as hard as the other members to become a member. I think it would be a very thoughtful and decent thing to do. We give things like Oscars and Medals of Honor posthumously (sp?), why not initiate this man? What harm will it really do?

I agree he should be initiated ! Please keep us updated on any response you receive :)

James -

Great response. I agree wholeheartedly, and if you would like support or a follow-up, IM me.

AEKDB to you, and to the departed - hopefully we can do the right thing here for this young man.

Semper,

RC

excellent idea
 

there is no question about what is the right thing...
good job
mmcat

Good job James. He should be initiated. I hope your nationals will feel the same.

Excellent job, James. Dumb question, though. How would they initiate posthumously? Could they do it as a graveside service? Or in the chapter house, perhaps with his father or his brother (if he has any) taking the vows on his behalf? I'm not sure how this could be handled, but it is an interesting situation.

At the very least, I think that your Fraternity's Memorial Service should be performed at your Leadership Academy in honor of your brother.

Please do let us know what happens.

James,

I concur with your feelings on this. Greeklawgirl brings up some good questions, but nothing that couldn't be overcome.

James - I think you know what I think. ;) Wonderful letter.

A posthumous initiation could easily be done with his big (or if they didn't have them since they were a colony, the colony prez or someone else he was exceptionally close to) standing in his place.

Plus his family, I'm sure would appreciate it immensely. Any time you lose a loved one, people often are so uncomfortable that they just avoid mentioning them which makes it hurt even more. Anything you do to recognize the person who's gone is the right thing to do.

James, that is a very wonderful and true thought about an nearly Inititiated young man who had the thought of your great organization in his heart and mind.

It seems sometimes that the National Headquarters have blinders on themselves.

I for one would vote strongly yes! There has to be some sort of exception in a case such as this! Life is gray, not all black and white!

You do a GOOD THING by doing this! You are a very thoughtful Brother to You Fraternity!

Interfraternally Your Brother,

Good Luck James, I think to initiate him would be the right thing to do! Keep us posted!

Great letter James. Good luck to you on your quest. should your national offciers say no, thats not necessarily the end of it. You can make a motion from the floor at your national convention. If your orginization is like mine, the undergrads have the final say on everything. they even have to OK the decisions of the national officers in a motion at the beginning of the assembly. You KNOW your brothers would support the measure. So you could go that route.

Best of luck to you...

Very good letter, James! Keep us posted

Very good letter, very well put.

If the young man in question has died, obviously he cannot take whatever vows would be required of a brother - but if it is plain that he intended to do so, and that he worked toward earning the rights and privileges due to a brother, he should be accorded that status.

Does he have a relative who is a member of Kappa Sigma? Or a close friend? Perhaps he could represent him. If nothing else, I agree with greeklawgirl that your fraternity's memorial service would be appropriate.

Please keep us posted.

another thought. My fraternity explains that for certain extreme circumstances, variences are allowed for initiation purposes. Example, if you are initiating a blind member, have someone discretely explain the actions taking place they cant see. A NM who has to leave for millitary service immediately, and a ritual cannot be scheduled in a timely manner can be initiated by having the ritual read to them. Harry truman was a sititng president, and one of his cabinet members was a Lambda Chi. They were on a train traveling somewhere and truman inquired about wanting to be initiated. His cabinet member telegraphed ahead and had a chapter meet the train at a station, they boarded, and President Truman saw ritual performed on the train, and became a brother. exceptions can and are made. You just have to convince the powers that be that it wont destroy your order if this happens. Also, try to enlist the help of powerful and prominent alumni of your org to help you out withthe cause. Most often they are sympathetic to the cause..

last ditch effort.... our chapters are fined $200 per case for unauthorized initiations. If it was impoortant enough to us, we'd just do it and pay the damned fee. You think theyd close you for it? they wouldnt want the bad PR amongst your alums.

James,
I think you are completely right! As a founder of my chapter, if anything had happend to any of the founding sisters, I would expect them to be initiated along with the rest of us. Things can be worked out, and I'm sure your National will understand, and work with the chapter to go through with the initiation. Good luck, and let us know what happens.

Fraternally,
Beth

Great letter, James. I hope that they initiate him. It's such a sad story. Good luck!

Great letter, and I hope it all works out for you. Just remember to ask the young man's parents if they approve is all :)

Any updates? I didn't want to post in your forum.